


Am I Ginger: The Mourning After

by The_Red_Rabbit



Series: Am I...Ginger? [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, F/M, as always there are cameos from characters i didn't mention, because spoilers, i do promise this fic series is about growing and healing, i'm not good at descriptions, it's gonna start out sad but get lighter i promise, progress isn't linear nor is time, realistic depictions of trauma and mental illness have to have a relapse in order to work, shhhhhhh, some people go too far to escape feelings, there's gonna be alternate universe shenanigans and different expressions of grief, wait is saying it that way a spoiler, yet it's still progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:07:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 29
Words: 135,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24905824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Red_Rabbit/pseuds/The_Red_Rabbit
Summary: Picking up right from where season 1 left off."The Doctor's dead."That's where this story left off. Despite many attempts to contact him, he's been nowhere to be found. But DOES that mean he's dead? The ragtag group of misfits he left behind keep having conflicting thoughts on the subject. Is he dead? Held hostage somewhere in need of rescue? Just avoiding them?Just when they give up hope, the Doctor decides to crash his own funeral. Two funeral crashings in a row, that has to be a record for him. But can he still fit in the world he left behind, or has he changed too much? Is it even a good idea to try?Set when Amy and Rory are on their honeymoon (between "A Christmas Carol" and "The Impossible Astronaut"). This is also just after "The Death of the Doctor" episode of the Sarah Jane Adventures. As usual, I'm playing fill-in-the-blanks with unexplored parts of canon.
Series: Am I...Ginger? [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1785223
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. Lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well hello! Back from an almost 3 month long season break there! We're picking up right where we left off, so buckle up!
> 
> In the meantime, I've been finally getting closer to being caught up. I was a Doctor Who fan starting in 2010, but stuff happened and I stopped watching in 2013. I've been rewatching over the past year and am finally up to watching episodes I've never seen before! I originally left off at Rings of Akhaten, but now I'm just past Flatline! I'm gonna watch more today! I've got a lot of thoughts about where I'm gonna take the 11th Doctor and what sorts of justifications I'll have to make for Moffat's poor choices, but I'm REALLY loving Peter Capaldi's take on the Doctor and cannot WAIT to eventually get to write him. So anyway. Here we are.
> 
> Well we're back at it with a very cheery season opener, as per! I promise better times are coming, we've just gotta have a spot of drama! If you recall, we left off with Ginger thinking the Doctor is dead, but there are much more pressing concerns in her life. Who are these doppelgangers? What is she really? We're getting very close to those answers, but first we must muddle through the murky waters of Ginger's complicated relationship with the Doctor, which is about to get another level of complexity. Will they even get along anymore now that he's regenerated? Where do they fit in each others lives? As always, we're gonna have cameos and appearances from this era's companions, so stay tuned!

"He's dead."

"Ginger, come on-" Jack tried to reason with her.

"I know he is."

"You don't know that-"

"If he was alive, he'd come back. He wouldn't leave me feeling like this. He'd know that something knocked out communications so he'd have it fixed and he'd be here to tell me he's fine!"

"Ginger, it doesn't always work that way-"

" _Don't tell me how it works_ ," she snapped, her voice rising to dangerous levels. "Are you still trying to call him?"

Alex looked up from her phone. "No answer."

"You're useless," Ginger snapped, snatching the phone from her. "I'll do this myself."

And she did. She tried him over and over again all night until Alex's phone died, then she cried herself to sleep.

...

"Has she come out of her room yet?" Jack asked when he stopped by the next afternoon.

"Not yet," Alex said. "You know how she is...Should I be worried?"

"I'm monitoring her vitals," Thea said. "I'll tell you if you should be. You know, I think it might help if she had a cat. Cats are scientifically proven to be a great companion during times of emotional stress."

"I agree," said Alex. "But this building won't let us have pets."

Ginger's door opened.

"Ginger!" Alex said. "How are you? You want something to eat? I can get you a sandwich-"

"No time for that," Ginger said, throwing on her coat. "Got stuff to do."

Alex exchanged an anxious look with Jack. "Like what?"

"I'm gonna go find the Doctor," she replied. 

"But I thought you said-"

"I know what I said," she replied firmly. "But I tend to jump to conclusions. It's part of my disorder. I've decided that I need answers and I'm going to find them."

"What if they're not the answers you want?" Alex asked.

"That's still better than not knowing. Jack, can you do some poking around? See if anyone knows anything?"

"I can, if you think that'll help," he said.

"Good," Ginger said. "Alex and I are going to see Sarah Jane."

"We are?" Alex asked. "Why?"

"She's got that super computer, doesn't she?"

...

"I thought maybe you could help," Ginger said awkwardly. "Because if he's not dead, then he must be in trouble. He wouldn't just vanish like that."

 _Oh wouldn't he?_ Sarah Jane thought to herself privately.

"How can I help?" she said instead.

"I thought maybe you could get Mr Smith to poke around satellite images from this year. See if we can track a pattern. And maybe I can help you with any alien sighting cases you investigate. Just in case he shows up, you know? He likes that kind of stuff."

Sarah Jane could see how hard Ginger was trying to keep it together. She knew this must be difficult for her. She knew what it was like to some degree, but she also accepted that there were things about this particular situation that she could never understand.

More than that, though, Sarah Jane had personal reasons to believe the Doctor was still alive. She'd seen him in a future regeneration, after all. But she couldn't mention that to Ginger. It wasn't just a matter of accidentally revealing information about the future, it was also a matter of preserving Ginger's well-being. What if he _was_ purposely avoiding her? Sarah Jane searched her mind and couldn't remember that regeneration even mentioning Ginger.

"I'll do whatever I can," Sarah Jane assured her. 

"Maybe we can contact old friends of his?" Ginger asked. "Anyone who might still be around?"

...

"Well that was a waste of time!" Ginger hissed as they marched back to Sarah Jane's car. "LINDA, really? I mean, I coulda told you they wouldn't know what they're talking about. Amateur alien spotters. They were sort of the joke of my time as a UFO chaser."

"You were a UFO chaser?" asked Sarah Jane.

"For a while," Ginger said. "My point is that we all knew about LINDA and figured it dissolved because they all realized they were being a bit silly."

They got in the car and Ginger leaned back against the seat with a sigh, closing her eyes.

Sarah Jane paused in the act of buckling her seat belt. "Do you need to stop? We can go back to the house and I can put a kettle on. We don't have to keep going through all this disappointment. It can't be good for you."

"No," Ginger said. "We have to keep going. If we don't, then I'll give up hope. I can't give up. He's out there and he's in trouble, I can _feel_ it."

"Is that an ability you two have? To feel each others pain?"

"No," she admitted. "It's part of my disorder, okay? I know I'm imagining things, but that's why it'll be so good when I can find him and stop imagining, right?"

"That makes sense," Sarah Jane said gently. "We're going to find him alive, you know. I know we will. And everything will be alright."

Ginger blinked back tears. "I know. Just drive, okay? We don't have to talk about this now."

Sarah Jane smiled empathetically. "Alright. I just want you to know you're not alone. I know how much it hurts when he disappears like this. Believe me, I do."

...

"I haven't seen him since the wedding," said Wilfred Mott. "Lovely little ceremony. He just turned up. I had a feeling, but of course I couldn't say it at the time. How many sugars?"

"Two is fine," Ginger said, trying not to seem impatient. 

Wilfred went ahead and put three sugars in her tea and handed it to her. "But no, I haven't seen him since. It's been over ten years now, I'm surprised anyone's come knocking. Why are you asking? If it's urgent, I can find him for you. I've done it before and I can do it again."

"How would you do that?" Ginger asked.

"I just call up my friends, ask them to report anyone in a brown coat with sort of sticky-uppy hair."

"Oh," Ginger said, unable to mask her disappointment. "Well, thanks for the offer, but no. That won't be necessary. But you will give Sarah Jane a call if you hear anything?"

"Of course."

Ginger finished her tea in one gulp and stood up. "We should be going. Thank you for your help."

...

Ginger and Sarah Jane were leaving when a silver car pulled up. A red haired woman exited the car.

"Alright, you lot, out!" she said in a commanding and authoritative way. "Time to have a visit with grand-dad."

"Do we _have_ to?" asked a pre-teen boy as he was ushered out of the car. "Jordan said I could come over to play xbox."

"You can do that _after_ we've visited gramps," the mother said. "And don't be rude this time!"

Two other even smaller children followed her out of the car and she turned just in time to see Sarah Jane and Ginger on the front stoop. Ginger could tell immediately who this was without even needing to be told.

"You're Donna Noble," Ginger said.

"Yeah?" Donna said. "Who's asking? Do I know you?"

"No," Ginger said. "No, we've never met."

Donna narrowed her eyes. "Listen. If you're selling something, we're not buying it."

"Not selling," Ginger replied. "I was never much of a salesperson. Too anti-capitalist. And from what I hear about you, you wouldn't be likely to fall for anything like that."

"Donna?" Wilfred opened the front door and rushed outside. "I knew that was you! Why don't you come ahead and bring the kids inside?"

"I was just chatting to these people," Donna said. "Who are they?"

"Nobody, they were just leaving," said Wilfred.

Sarah Jane couldn't think of anything adequate to say that would sum up her feelings on the subject. "It's been brilliant seeing you, Donna Noble," she said, taking her leave and getting into her own car.

"Why did she say that like she knows me?" Donna asked, feeling very uncomfortable and oddly exposed. This made her lash out. 

The Doctor had told Ginger exactly what was at risk if Donna ever remembered, and out of friendship for him she stopped this. "Don't think about it too hard, Donna. Some things are just, well..."

Donna and Ginger just looked at each other for a moment. "Go inside, kids," Donna said to her children. She waited til they were gone then put her hands on her hips. "Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're sad. Why do you look so sad when you look at me? Gramps looks like that too sometimes just for a second. Then it's gone."

"Donna, you have a beautiful life," Ginger said. "I mean, I'm sure someone thinks it's beautiful. Personally, I'm not the kid type. But trust me, this is nothing you have to worry about. I'm sorry I wasted so much of your time." She started to walk away.

"I know!" Donna called after her. "I'm not stupid, you know!"

Ginger paused but kept her back turned. "I know you're not stupid. That's why I'm so honored to have the chance to meet you."

"What the hell does that mean?" she demanded. "Oi! I'm still talking to you! Don't walk away from me!"

Ginger had heard a lot about Donna, and based on those stories she determined the best way to get her off her back. She whipped around and stared her down. "I'll walk anywhere I damn well please, thank you very much! Who the hell do you think you are, giving _me_ orders? I don't owe you anything, lady! Back. The fuck. Off. Got that?"

This only incensed Donna further. "Now listen here, missy-"

Ginger winced. "Don't call me that."

"I don't know who you are, but I'm not about to stand here and be insulted by a short-"

"I'm _barely_ shorter than you are!" Ginger protested.

"Twenty-something with a bad attitude and a worse hair cut-"

Ginger reached up to touch her hair. "What's wrong with my hair?" She tried for a smile. "But hey! Natural red head club, am I right?" She raised a hand for a high five but saw one wasn't coming and dropped it hastily. "I was joking anyway-"

But Donna wasn't at all amused. "You're not even worth it. You're just a skinny little slip of nothing trying to step up to me. You'd break like a twig."

"That's more like it," Ginger said. 

Ginger climbed back in the car and leaned against the seat the same way she had at the last stop, but this time she began to cry. But it wasn't a good, honest cry. It was a cry of frustration, and she was furiously trying to hold it back.

At first Sarah Jane didn't say anything, just pulled out of the driveway and began driving away.

"I take it the Doctor's mentioned her," Sarah Jane said.

"She was his best friend," Ginger said. "Of course he did. I never thought I'd actually get to meet her."

"I wish you could've known her before. She wasn't much different from this...Then again, I didn't know her much. She never stopped being good with the shouting, from what I understand, but she changed. She developed. Traveling with the Doctor made her different."

"Is she really better off? I mean I know he said she would die if she ever remembered, but is she really better off not knowing?"

"Maybe she's better off getting a chance to move on," Sarah Jane offered.

"That's bullshit," Ginger said. "If I ever have the chance to help her, I will."

"Who says she needs it?" Sarah Jane asked. "If she's happy in her life, why would you need to bring all this down on her? You know how hard it is for us to let that life go. Sometimes you're better off not knowing what you don't know."

…

Ginger accompanied Sarah Jane on all her missions from then on. Whenever a new alert would come through, she'd put on her jacket and sweep out the door before Sarah Jane even had a chance to find her keys.

"He'll be at this one," Ginger said. "I'm sure of it. This is _exactly_ his cup of tea. He'd just _love_ this one."

But he was never there. 

"Maybe it's not healthy to put so many expectations on these cases," Jack said. "I mean, I get it, I do. I started doing this because I was looking for someone too."

"You did?" Ginger asked.

He nodded. "My brother. I only found him when I stopped looking and, well...Let's just say it didn't work out. But my point is that you might actually enjoy this sort of work. You have a knack for it."

"Sometimes you just have to accept that you'll know when you know," said Alex. "I mean, I could've used the Doctor to find my parents, but I knew I probably wouldn't like what I found. I might even have brought some danger on them by exposing their whereabouts when I thought they might still be alive. Sometimes you've just gotta trust."

But Ginger didn't accept that. 

"He wouldn't give up on me," Ginger said. "So I won't give up on him. I owe him at least that much."

...

Ginger accompanied them to a UFO sighting in Blackpool, but someone had got there first.

"This is a closed scene, back off," said a Scottish man in his mid-twenties with jet-black hair. "We were here first, we have first dibs on any remains."

"Aw hell," Ginger said under her breath, trying to shield her face.

"What?" Alex whispered. "What is it?"

"The EETS."

"The what?"

"Edinburgh ExtraTerrestrial Squad," she explained. "Bloody amateurs, really, and much too bigoted toward aliens for my taste. I shacked up with them when I first moved to Scotland."

A severe-looking brunette recognized her. "Oh my god?" She nudged the man next to her. "Cam, is that who I think it is?"

The man named Cam, who was also very dark-haired and severe, looked over at her. "No way? Cinna?"

Alex raised her eyebrows. "Sinna?"

"With a C," Ginger said. "But yes, it's meant to be said that way."

"Well would you look who it is," the man who told them to back off said. "And with Torchwood and press on your arm as well. Which does that make you?"

Sarah Jane crossed her arms. "You know who we are?"

"Of course."

"How?" asked Jack.

"We keep tabs on the competition. And sometimes keep tabs on people who think they're the competition, but are really just muckin' about. We thought you'd died during the Miracle or at least fallen in with some bleeding hearts like LINDA or something."

"You're not far off, Andy," Ginger said. "Except in the sense of being not at all in the vacinity."

"Blimey," Andy said. "Almost didn't recognize you. You got sort of hot."

"And you're doing what?" she demanded. "Still trying to kill aliens who didn't do anything to anyone?" She had a horrible thought. "Killed any lately?"

"No," he said, picking up on her tone. "Why?"

She tried to inquire without giving much away. "Have you heard of a man called 'The Doctor'?"

They all laughed. 

"Now you _do_ sound like LINDA," said Cam.

"Well?" Ginger demanded. "Have you?"

"Of course we have," the woman said. "Urban legend, isn't he?"

"Only to people without proof, Ainsley," Andy said calmly. "Which we've had for years. We know he exists, but we've never had the pleasure. We've never been first at the scene." He studied her closely. "Have you been one of his girls, Cinna?"

Ginger raised her eyebrows. "One of his what?"

"Girls," Andy replied. "He always has a different one with him, then he throws you away."

Ginger didn't want to give too much away in case they wanted to hurt him in some way. "It's not like that." She mentally kicked herself, knowing this gave away too much.

Andy's smile widened. "I thought so. I never would've guessed he'd pick you, but I guess it makes sense with you looking like that. But tell me: if it isn't like that, then why are you here with Torchwood and the little journalist lady instead of with him? You're his little reject pile. Not good enough to make the cut."

"You have _no idea_ what you're talking about," Ginger spat.

"Oh really?" Andy replied smugly. "Look, we can stand around chatting all day. I'd love to get caught up. But we've got a scene to investigate."

...

"So what's the deal with them?" Alex asked on the way home that night. "EETS? You've never talked about them."

"It was at a low point in my life," Ginger admitted. "I was barely 18, I was an illegal in a new country...I thought I could fit in with a group of alien hunters."

"Do you think..." Alex said slowly. "Maybe they could help us?"

She raised her eyebrows. "You mean find the Doctor? No. Absolutely not. They're not cool Mulders looking for proof. They're poachers. They'd kill the Doctor and put him on display. Hell they'd do that to me if they knew. It's why we parted ways."

"Do you think they'd come after you or Alex?" Jack asked. "Maybe to lure the Doctor?"

"No, we're safe as long as they believe we're human," Ginger said. "They'd find it too crass. They prefer 'legitimate investigative measures'."

"You said they're the Edinburgh ExtraTerrestrial Squad?" Sarah Jane said. "What are they doing in England?"

"They go all over," Ginger said. "They're based in Edinburgh, but if they stayed there nothing would ever happen."

"Why not come to London or Cardiff instead of commuting to the action?" Jack asked.

"They're very pro-Scottish independence."

"And you're not?"

"I can have things in common with people I despise," she said dismissively. "Just because I agree with Mitt Romney that Trump is terrible doesn't mean I suddenly like Mitt Romney."

A short silence fell.

"You know we're not his reject pile," Sarah Jane said. "I don't want you girls believing that. Not for one minute."

...

Two months passed, and Jack and Alex were at their wits end with Ginger. She spent every waking moment combing the Earth for some trace of the Doctor. It couldn't be healthy. Alex was beginning to lose faith that the Doctor was alive, and Jack had exhausted all his resources. The only person who never gave up was Sarah Jane, so Ginger spent most of her time on Bannerman Road.

Ginger and Sarah Jane were becoming unlikely friends through this. They'd share stories of old times they'd had and reminisce about when things were more certain. Ginger could sense there was something Sarah Jane wasn't saying, but she figured it was just something about the nature of her relationship with the Doctor so it couldn't be very important. 

Ginger was becoming more frantic by the day. It was starting to exhaust Alex. She and Jack decided they had no choice but to stage an intervention.

"I think it might be time," Alex said. "He wouldn't want us to do this to ourselves. Maybe we should have a small service. Get a few people together."

“No," Ginger said as she got the implication. "No absolutely not. There's no concrete evidence that he’s dead! Mr Smith and I have been scouring for months and found no trace!” She glared at Jack. " _You're_ supposed to be helping!"

“I'm trying," Jack said delicately. "I'm not saying he's dead, but this obsession is bordering on unhealthy. Even if he's not _dead_ dead, it might help to at least mourn the person he used to be...Maybe it's not time to mourn him, but maybe it's time to mourn the death of that relationship."

Ginger just glared at him in that way that she always used to glare at the Doctor. Jack suddenly understood why the Doctor had always found her so formidable. “We aren't having a wake for someone who might still be alive!" she snarled. "There’s not even a body that we can bury with a little bell in case he wakes up. He’s still out there, somewhere.”

“You were the one who said he was dead,” Alex pointed out.

“I’m melodramatic,” she waved this off. “I’m a classically trained Shakespearean actor with severe anxiety who jumps to the worst conclusions.”

“Ginger,” Thea tried rationalizing. “I know that when you slow down and let yourself believe that he’s dead, it’s debilitating. I know that this is your way of not letting yourself feel that. But you need to mourn. Because this isn't what he’d want. He’d want you to move on.”

“Don’t tell me what he’d want!” she snapped. “None of you really know what he’d want!”

“Actually, Thea and I kind of do,” Alex reminded her. “I could feel everything, and he was the one who programmed her in the first place. He would want us to keep moving forward. We can’t let ourselves get stuck.”

“So what?” She shook her head. “This is your big brilliant idea? Have a little get together and exchange sob stories? Wallow in it?” She looked at Alex. “Doesn’t that just sound miserable to you?”

“I’m on medication,” she reminded her. “I can handle it. And I think I need this. I need a chance at catharsis. I feel like I’ve been holding my breath since August.”

“Well you can all go on without me, then,” she rolled her eyes. “Go be depressing on your own time. You don’t need me there.”

“Actually, we do,” Jack said. “And if the Doctor could say this to you, he’d need you there too.”

“Why?”

“Ginger...Didn’t he make you promise something before he left? He made you promise you wouldn’t lose the music. That you’d always keep singing.”

“Yeah, what’s your point?” she grumbled. 

“My point is that you haven’t sang even a note since that night. And if that was his dying wish for you, you haven’t been honoring it.”

“If you haven't noticed, last time you guilted me about this, I sang and then it all went to hell."

“That had nothing to do with you singing, and you know it. If there has to be a wake - and I know this is unconventional, but then again we always were - I think you should play a set there. Sing a few songs for him. It’s what he’d want.”

These words hit her hard. “No. I’m sorry, but no. We’re not having a wake. Not until we know for sure.”

“Alright, alright, no wake,” Alex said, sensing they were pushing her a bit far. “But why don’t you help me work on adapting our stories into actual books? The Doctor said that you’d be able to clear up some of my bigger misconceptions.”

“Look, Alex, I’m sorry but I just...I don’t think I can do that. I can’t let myself remember. It’s too hard to think about.”

…

Time passed and suddenly it was mid-October.

“Has she even once mentioned witches? Or vampires?” Jack asked. “What about ghosts or goblins or...or anything Halloween related?”

“Not once this year,” Alex admitted. “I’d thought maybe she’d feel better now that it’s October...but she’s still not acting like herself at all. Everything is about trying to find out if he’s alive.”

“I mean, it’s probably nothing to worry about, right?” He was trying to sound nonchalant, but Alex could sense that he was worried.

Ginger came out of her room in search of food. 

“Hey Snappy, how’s it going?” Jack asked.

She narrowed her eyes, suspiciously. “That was way too casual to be casual. What do you want?”

“Wow, cutting right to the chase,” he replied. “I was just wondering what your plans for Halloween are this year. I know you’re probably not going to tell us what your costume is, because you like a dramatic reveal, but-”

“I honestly don’t think I’ll have time for Halloween this year,” she cut him off. “Haven’t even given any thought to getting a costume.”

“No costume?” he asked. “But that’s...not like you.”

“Yeah, well, I can always do a do-over of this Halloween when I’ve got the time. When the Doctor gets back, we can have all the Halloweens we want.”

Alex and Jack exchanged worried looks.

“But what if…” Alex began, tactfully. “What if he doesn’t come back? You know I don’t want to think that either, but...What if you wait forever, miss all the Halloweens, and he never comes back?”

“That won’t happen,” she replied. “Because we’ll find him. Wherever he is. He’ll be back, he promised.”

…

Ginger came out of her room one night to see Alex passed out on the sofa with her laptop on her chest. Ginger sighed and went to turn it off and put it on the table - it really isn’t safe to have delicate electronics in such a precarious position. What if you should roll over?

She was just about to close it when she noticed what was on the screen. It was the story - the one Alex was writing about them. It was open to when the Doctor and Ginger had met Queen Bess.

“Oh well that…” Ginger breathed, brow furrowing. “That is just wrong.”

Then, without thinking about it, she sat down on the floor and got to work fixing all the errors.

…

Alex awoke early the next morning to the sound of furious typing. She opened her eyes and looked around, momentarily disoriented. She took a second to stretch - sleeping on the sofa had made her limbs stiff. Then she focused on the sound and turned her head.

“Ginger? What’re you doing?”

Ginger didn’t answer immediately, just lifted a hand to furiously wipe away some tears. This barely broke her stride, she was typing so furiously. “It was wrong,” she choked out. “All of this. It didn’t happen like that. Had to fix it.”

“Have you been up all night with this?” Alex asked, suddenly concerned. She climbed down to the floor to look at it. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t’ve-”

“Had to fix it,” Ginger repeated. “Didn’t want you thinking...We weren’t like that.”

“Weren’t you?” she asked.

“Robin and Mr Smith had it easy by comparison,” Ginger said. “You didn’t understand the scope - how could you? You got it almost...but not completely...You need to understand…”

“Understand...what?”

“How much we hurt each other. Just like...all the time. We couldn’t help it.”

“Ginger…”

Ginger’s shoulders began to quake, as the sobs she’d barely been suppressing came forth like a dam had burst.

“Hey,” Alex said, taking the laptop from her and placing it on the floor as she awkwardly put an arm around Ginger. “Hey, it’s alright…”

“It’s not!” Ginger said. “I mean, how can she just…?”

“Who?”

“Robin. She wasted so much time. So much time being...just a stupid bitch-”

“Hey, don’t say that-”

“It’s true, if she would’ve just-”

“You can’t blame yourself-”

“I’m not blaming myself, I’m blaming her. This isn’t about me! This is about the story!”

Alex knew she wouldn’t be able to get Ginger to fess up. “Sure it is…”

“Robin was so stupid. Why couldn’t she have just...And anyway, now what’s she supposed to do? Like what’s even the point of her character now? She loved him so much. She never loved anything like that. And then he’s just dead? Just like that? Alex, she loved him so much!”

If she hadn't been able to feel that with absolute certainty, the way Ginger dissolved into sobs would've clued her right in. Alex delicately took the laptop from her and put it aside as she climbed to the floor next to her. She felt a certain deja vu as she put her arms around her and allowed her to sob into her neck.

“I know, dear, I know…” Alex felt a bit awkward saying ‘dear’, the word felt a bit weird coming out of her mouth. But it’s what Sarah Jane always said when she was falling apart, so she hoped it would do. “But your... _her_ story isn’t over. There’s so much more out there. You’ll see.”

“You were right,” she replied, voice breaking. “You were right. We should have a wake. I know we got to say goodbye but...maybe we need to mean it this time.”

“Yeah,” she breathed. “Yeah, maybe.”


	2. Voyage Voyage

Ginger enlisted the help of Sarah Jane and Jack, and they called around to as many people as they could, trying to gather people for the wake. Sarah Jane offered up her place as a venue, and they gathered there.

“It’s so weird to think of him actually being gone,” Martha said on the day of. “I mean it’s been years since...And we just knew something was wrong...But it’s still hard to think about.”

“How many people are coming?” Sarah Jane asked, trying to move the conversation along. 

“Supposed to be a small thing,” Martha said. “Couple of his close friends that we could get in touch with.”

When Sarah Jane had been approached to help plan the wake, she'd briefly considered reminding them that she didn't believe the Doctor was dead. She'd been through this before with him, and now required a bit more proof. You could call this denial all you want, but she knew she'd met him in a new regeneration year before. She believed he'd come back. She just couldn't spoil the future too much by offering this as proof. Luke, Clyde, and Rani were all with her in this belief, since they'd had the same encounter themselves. 

She could also see the point in having this wake. She'd watched over Ginger for these past few months, and this obsession wasn't good for her. She was falling apart, and it couldn't be good for Alex to be around. Maybe they needed more closure than she did before they could move on with their lives.

…

It was a small, intimate affair - which is a phrase Ginger hated. Calling something ‘intimate’ was awkward enough...but to call it an affair? The English language sometimes frustrated her. Good thing she had several others languages to switch between if one grew tiresome.

“Twul hastoven mor glarvan, Doc?” she said under her breath, raising an empty glass in a toast. This was a Gallifreyan phrase that roughly translated to: “Bet you’re having a laugh, you bastard.” But of course the person she was addressing was nowhere to be found. Suddenly she had, shall we say, a Spider Sense, and turned her head to catch the sight of an unfamiliar man in the doorway. She'd never seen this man in her life, and she'd gotten well-acquainted with most of the Doctor's long-term contacts during her search for him. This dark haired stranger simultaneously had the appearance of three children stacked on top of each other beneath a tweed coat and an aged wizard posing as an art professor in a time period before bow ties went out of fashion. All that being said, there was something familiar about him that she couldn't put a finger on. It couldn't be anything about his appearance, because she would've remembered if she'd ever seen someone who looked that out of place. She knew he'd been watching her by the way he looked away just a second too late and exited the room quietly. She got up to go follow, but got distracted by someone she _did_ recognize. Cupid smiled at her in what he approximated to be a soothing manner and left through the front door, trusting that she'd follow. She hesitated a moment longer before following him, deciding the weird stranger was less important than this.

Ginger closed the door behind her and leaned against it, imploring Cupid with her eyes to tell her that he had good news. "Why are you here?" she asked.

“Heard through the cosmic grapevine that there was a funeral on,” Cupid said. “That’s not information you want swimming around in the multiverse, so I wanted to let you know I killed it for you.”

“I didn’t think of that,” she admitted. “I guess it would be a bit like all the demons finding out the slayer’s been replaced by a robot-”

“You misunderstand me, Pumpkin," Cupid replied. "This isn’t me trying to protect you all from retaliation from the Doctor’s _enemies_ , understand? None of that is half as terrifying as imagining what a certain other Ginger might do if you broadcast your whereabouts and the fact that your Doctor is dead. She might project her issues onto you - it is what you lot are best at. But I did come bearing sincere condolences.” He softened. “I know you’ve been having a hard time with this, my dear. You should’ve reached out. I can stay if you need me…”

“I don’t need anyone,” she said, finally standing up straight and crossing her arms.

He smiled sadly. “I did think you’d say that. In any case, I’ve got a gift for you.” He saw the defensive stance she immediately adopted when he reached into his pocket, and more carefully withdrew a small oval stone, opaque and white. “For you. I don't like seeing you suffer unnecessarily.”

“What is it?” Ginger asked, staring at the object suspiciously.

“A Trivscallion Stone,” he explained. “It’ll remove your suffering. I’m sure young Alex would appreciate it.”

"It's for Alex?"

"No, you misunderstand...It's for _you_ , but your emotions directly influence hers when you're in such close proximity."

She felt a pang of guilt at this reminder. "And this will help?"

“It will siphon off your pain, transferring it into the stone until you’re ready to deal with it.”

She scoffed - this was ridiculous. “So what? I’d use those tiny hooks on the bottom of it to fix it above my heart?”

He smiled to himself. “You always were a poetical sort. That would be poetic, but no. It goes at the base of your brain stem. This is about neurochemistry, not poetry.”

She hesitated before shaking her head. “No. Thanks but no. I’m trying to stay clear headed.”

“You can’t be clear headed if you’re in pain,” he said, kindly. “Look, just take it anyway. Personally, I wouldn't use it. I think removing even a tiny bit of emotion is a nasty business.”

"Then why give it to me?"

"As a way out? If you need it?" His eyes were clouded with sadness. "I've seen what nasty things Gingers can do when they feel backed into an emotional corner. If you need a way out, just for a second's small relief, this could help. But please only use it in moderation." He took her by the wrist and placed the stone in her hand. “Hook it in, then turn the stone clockwise. It has notches in ten settings, so it can remove your emotions gradually with minimal risk. Setting one should do it. I would _not_ recommend going farther than setting three."

The stone was cold in her hand as she looked at it. "What does setting ten do?"

"It turns your emotions off entirely, and you’ll just feel worse when you get them back.” He said this last part sternly. “Please don't make me regret giving this to you. Promise me you'll use it safely, or better yet, not at all. I know how you Gingers like to go overboard when you don’t want to feel something."

"I'll take it under advisement."

"This is just to help you get through the funeral, you understand? I'll be back for it at the end of the traditional grieving period - let's say, three days - so you can safely and gradually transfer your feelings back if you do use it - which, I should reiterate, I don't advise..." He hesitated a moment, hands fidgeting anxiously. “I can stay, you know. For the funeral. As support. If you'd like." He rushed to clarify things so that Ginger wouldn't feel uncomfortable. "I don't want to crowd you, I know mourning is a solitary thing...but if you need...Not that you, you know, _need_...But I'm here. I can keep being here."

He was very careful to phrase it without using the words 'want' or 'need' because they tended to make her defensive. He wanted her to know he could be there. She had to pluck up the courage to ask.

She felt tears rising just beneath the surface. "I..." She took a shaky breath then shook her head. "You said you're on the run. It can't be safe for you to be here."

"It isn't," he said, almost pleading with his eyes. "Cupids always drift back to their Gingers when they're in stress, so if the Trickster's Brigade wants to find me, lingering too long will pose a risk."

"To us?"

He shook his head. "Just to me. The rules are to not directly harm you. I don't count."

She tilted her head. "...There are rules?"

He smiled sadly. "Aren't there always?"

"But you can be harmed? I mean, there's a way? You got shot...I remember it. And Doppelginger said it wouldn't kill you, and _clearly_ it didn't...You're not like Jack?"

"Not exactly. But I'm not that far off. And yes, my dear. There is a way. There's always a loophole in these sorts of things and I, well, I broke my contract, so to speak."

“I don’t understand…” she said. She shook her head to clear it. “You know what, no. Just go. Just- just leave me alone, alright?”

He just smiled ruefully and nodded. “Whatever you need. I really am sorry for your loss.” He snapped his fingers and was gone.

Alex opened the door. “There you are!” she said, anxiously. “I’ve been looking all over! We were beginning to get worried.”

“Worried?” Ginger made a face and stowed the stone in one of the hidden pockets on her dress. “I was only gone for a minute, chill.”

“You ready?” Alex asked. “Because we are when you are.”

In all the commotion, Ginger had entirely forgotten the weird stranger she’d seen before. “Suppose I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.”

“You sure you’re fine with this? Because you don’t have to do this if you’re just gonna break down and make a spectacle of yourself.”

“I’m a performance artist, Alex,” Ginger rolled her eyes, steeling herself. “The whole bloody point of my existence is to make a spectacle of myself.” They went back inside. She took a swig from a bottled water in her bag and made her way to a piano. Convincing Sarah Jane that they needed a real piano for the event had been tricky, but Sarah Jane actually liked the way it looked there so she was thinking about keeping it. They'd also set up speakers next to it. She nodded to Thea, who synced her karaoke capabilities to the speakers via wifi, then nodded at Jack. He got up and made his way to her.

“Are you sure you’re up for this?” he asked her in a hushed tone. “We can pick some more...uplifting songs? I mean, knowing the Doctor, he wouldn’t’ve wanted you to be so…”

“So what?” Ginger said, raising her eyebrows. “Melancholic?"

"Not exactly the word I was going to use, no," he said. "I was going to go with depressing."

She rolled her eyes. "You’re lucky that I’ve left out some _real_ depressing material, Captain Jack. I had worse in the original set list. Now let’s get this over with.” 

Sarah Jane stepped over to them. "Ready, dear?" she asked. Ginger nodded, so she turned to the assembled friends. "Excuse me, quiet down please," she said, forcefully. Quiet occurred instantly, which wasn't really saying something since the crowd hadn't exactly been rowdy to begin with. "Ginger is going to sing us a few songs before we go tonight. She was one of the Doctor's closest friends and it was his wish that she sing for you all. So give her your attention." She stepped aside.

“Hiya,” Ginger said, somewhat awkwardly. “I was a...sorta friend of the Doctor’s, like she said. Listen, sorry, I know this is tacky and not tacky in the way I like because, like, it's like I'm making this wake all about me when it shouldn't be. I don’t wanna be doing this but...It was his dying wish that I, y’know...sing. So I’m gonna...I'm gonna dedicate these all to him. He meant...” She swallowed hard. "He was a good guy, okay, and I'm not qualified to be a eugoogoly." She heard one soft exhale from the corner of the room that sounded like someone almost chuckling but exhaling through their nose instead. She looked up to see it was the same man she'd spotted before, the stranger in the bow tie. He was leaning against a door frame and smiling at her joke. But he had sad eyes. She frowned and closed her eyes, trying to put this from her mind. “This first song is by Regina Spektor.”

Jack began to play the piano as Ginger shaking leaned against it with one hand and began to sing:

_The man of a thousand faces_

_Sits down at the table_

_Eats a small lump of sugar_

_And smiles at the moon like he knows her_

_And begins his quiet ascension_

_Without anyone's sturdy instruction_

_To a place of no religion_

_Has found a path to our alikeness…_

She continued along, relying on the strength of nostalgia to sustain her. She found herself smiling a bit at certain points, even while a few stray tears leaked from her eyes. But finally the song ended, to a smattering of applause. 

“This next song,” she said. “Is by the Killers.”

This song seemed to take more out of her, and at certain points it was as if she could hardly speak the words for fear of her voice breaking.

_“I believe in you and me_

_And I'm coming to find you_

_If it takes me all night_

_Wrong until you make it right_

_And I'll forget you_

_At least I'll try_

_And run_

_And run_

_Tonight_

_Everything will be alright…”_

The chorus in particular was difficult for her. It was just a repetition of that same denial that she’d had for months, except she was letting it go. And it was painful. So painful that she would find herself clutching at her chest and trying not to sink to her knees. She finally made it back to the verse.

_“I wasn't shopping for a doll_

_To say the least, I thought I'd seen them all_

_But then you took me by surprise_

_I'm dreaming 'bout those dreamy eyes_

_I never knew, I never knew_

_So take your suitcase, 'cause I don't mind_

_And baby doll, I meant it every time_

_You don't need to compromise_

_I'm dreaming 'bout those dreamy eyes_

_I never knew, I never knew but it's alright, alright_

_Everything will be alright…”_

When the song finally ended, Ginger stood there for a moment with her eyes closed. She was visibly shaking.

"You alright, love?" Wilfred piped up, vocalizing what everyone else was thinking. "Maybe you should sit down, someone can get you a glass of water..."

Jack got up from the piano to comfort her. “You don’t have to do the last one,” he said to her, in a hushed voice. He touched her arm. “You know that, right? You’ve done enough. We can go sit down-”

“No I’ve got to finish this,” she said in a small voice. “I can do this, I swear I can do this.”

“Ginger, you’re barely standing and you’re shaking like a leaf.”

“I’m a leaf on the wind,” she said, trying to make things lighter with a reference. “Watch how I…” Then she realized what she'd said and choked. “Sorry, I...That was a bad reference to turn to. I don’t know why my mind went there.”

“Ginger, I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Jack said, sincerely. “But you don’t have to do this to yourself. It’s just hurting you.”

“Exactly,” she said. “I’ve got to...externalize it. Get it out there. I promise you, Jack, you would _not_ like the other ways I’ve considered hurting myself.”

He simply looked at her for a moment. “You’re sure about this?”

She took a shaky breath and nodded. “One last song.” Then she turned back to the small gathering of people as Jack resumed his place behind the piano. “This last song is in French. Because nobody knows how to write about sorrow quite like the French.” She steeled herself and glanced back at Jack with a small nod. He began to play.

_“Au dessus des vieux volcans,_

_Glisse des ailes sous les tapis du vent,_

_Voyage, voyage,_

_Eternellement._

_De nuages en marécages,_

_De vent d'Espagne en pluie d'équateur,_

_Voyage, voyage,_

_Vole dans les hauteurs_

_Au dessus des capitales,_

_Des idées fatales,_

_Regarde l'océan..._

_Voyage, voyage_

_Plus loin que la nuit et le jour,_

_Voyage_

_Dans l'espace inouï de l'amour._

_Voyage, voyage_

_Sur l'eau sacrée d'un fleuve indien,_

_Voyage_

_Et jamais ne revient._

_Sur le Gange ou l'Amazone,_

_Chez les blacks, chez les sikhs, chez les jaunes,_

_Voyage, voyage_

_Dans tout le royaume._

_Sur les dunes du Sahara,_

_Des iles Fidji au Fujiyama,_

_Voyage, voyage,_

_Ne t'arrêtes pas._

_Au dessus des barbelés,_

_Des coeurs bombardés,_

_Regarde l'océan._

_Voyage, voyage_

_Plus loin que la nuit et le jour,_

_Voyage_

_Dans l'espace inouï de l'amour._

_Voyage, voyage_

_Sur l'eau sacrée d'un fleuve indien,_

_Voyage_

_Et jamais ne revient._

_Voyage!”_

The crowd watched, stunned, as she very visibly fell apart but still continued to sing. Even when her voice cracked with the force of the tears that were exploding from her, even when her legs gave way beneath her and she sank to her knees during the final chorus.

The song finally ended and just after the final notes Ginger just softly spoke to herself: “Voyage, Doctor.” Then she doubled over completely and cried.

Jack and Alex moved forward at once to help her up and to a seat. Alex noticed an odd aroma wafting off her, barely noticeable. Ginger didn't wear perfumes, so she figured it must be a new shampoo or soap giving off this scent. It smelled like some sort of herb. She put it from her mind, deciding this wasn't the best time.

"Give her some air, people, for goodness sake," Sarah Jane said, motioning for people to stop crowding her.

Wilfred poured her a glass of water. "Here you go, love," he said, placing it in her hand. "It's alright, just drink up and you'll feel better."

Ginger didn't even seem to notice the water, she just stared blankly in front of her. She'd given up.

"You really, eh, you really knew him well, then, didja?" Wilfred asked her gently.

"I guess you could sort of say I'm his widow," she said dryly. "Don't say that though. I'm not the marrying type."

"My condolences, sincerely. He was a great man. A really, truly great man. He sacrificed his life for mine, and not a day goes by..."

Ginger let those words sink in and looked up at him. "He did what?"

"I always thought he was going to regenerate, at least," Wilfred carried on. "But something about the last time I saw him...It felt final. And I can't shake the image..."

"I think we need to let Ginger rest, Wilfred," Sarah Jane said, gently taking him by the arm. "Let's not crowd her." 

"My condolences again," Wilfred said as he was led away.

People moved forward to share in their grief and to tell Ginger that it had been a spectacular performance, but Ginger could hardly hear them. She’d accepted it. Finally. After all those months. Singing that song in French had finally made her realize that he was likely dead. The shock of this acceptance made her totally unable to take in the world around her. 

People were getting ready to leave and saying their final goodbyes when Ginger said she needed some air. Alex and Jack exchanged a look. 

“I’ll go with you,” Jack offered. 

“I’d rather be alone,” she said. “And don’t you try to stop me, Alex Mitchell, you’re looking pale enough as it is. I wouldn’t put you through another moment of my suffering.”

“Still-” Alex tried to protest. “We’d feel better if we knew you weren’t on your own right now.”

Ginger noticed Thea hovering on the periphery and realized what was happening.

“Oh my _god_ ,” she said, raising her voice a little. “I wouldn’t _kill myself_ at Sarah Jane’s house! I wouldn’t do that to her! Especially not at Doc’s funeral! Do you really think…” She was so furious that she couldn’t speak. “Listen, it was one of his last wishes that I wouldn’t hurt myself anymore. And I haven’t.” She raised her sleeves to show her unmarked arms. “He told me that hurting myself was hurting him and...and you know I’d never do anything to hurt him - not on purpose! So you can all stand down now! And let me have a little goddamn space!”

She took off further into the house, leaving them all to stand exchanging nervous looks. Alex tried to go after her.

Thea put out a hand to stop her. “Now’s not the time, small human,” she said, comfortingly. “I understand you want to pull her back off the ledge, but following her right now will only push her off it. I’m monitoring the situation. Patience.”

The man in tweed had been hovering unnoticed in the corner of the room, observing the scene. If anyone had taken the time to look up, they might've seen a strange expression in his eyes.

...

Ginger found herself in the attic. She looked out of the window and sang softly under her breath in Latin.

 _"Amare et sapere vix deo conceditur...Aeternum vale..."_ She choked on the last syllable and squeezed her eyes shut.

She reached into one of her hidden pockets to pull out a small bundle of greenery.

“Rosemary,” she said softly, turning the plant over in her hands. She pressed it to her lips briefly. “That’s for remembrance.”

Then a voice spoke. One she'd never heard in her life, though somehow recognized immediately.

“I hate to break up an Ophelia soliloquy with a nitpick, but I don't think that costume is exactly period-accurate.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Going on hiatus again. Back beginning of August. Feel free to leave your guesses in the comments, but I think I was fairly transparent.


	3. Here Lies Love

Ginger stiffened, her pulse quickening as an impossible hope flooded through her. 

The man seemed to recognize this hesitation and chuckled. “Aren’t you going to turn around, bright eyes?”

“If the rules of mythology hold true,” she replied, voice shaking. “Turning around would trap me forever. Besides, every now and then I fall apart.”

“There she is.” She could hear the stranger smiling. “My Angel of Music. And we get it, alright? You speak French and Latin. Sorry I ever doubted you, but you don’t have to beat me over the head with it.”

She turned around and looked at him. Standing at the top of the stairs was the man in the tweed coat who she'd noticed at the funeral. 

She cast around for something to say that wouldn’t betray her emotions. “Is that you, Mo-Dean?” she asked him, tentatively. Her voice shook ever so slightly.

He smiled at her from the foot of the stairs, full of a strange mixture of relief, hope, and sorrow. “It’s me, Mo-Dean.”

She moved slowly towards him, as if she were in a dream. “You’re...here? Really here?"

"You look like you've seen a ghost." He retracted his statement. "Well, not like _you've_ seen a ghost. We both know if you'd actually seen a ghost, you'd immediately go for a camera. You'd want proof. You'd want to study it. But you're just frozen. Sort of like a human would be if they saw a ghost."

That was something he'd say, and that realization made it hard for her to breathe. "It _is_ you. I can...I can feel it. I knew it the second you spoke, I…I don’t understand.”

“Look at you,” he said softly, almost beaming. “You look...Well, like Ginger Roswell, Queen of the Cryptids. A myth used to frighten children. Or, at the very least, a Victorian witch who killed her husband.” She nearly smiled at that, so flattered by the compliment that only he could give. “Stunning dress, really. And the veil...You’ve outdone yourself with the whole goth thing this time, Roswell.”

“Wh-where’ve you been?” she asked, struggling to hide her vulnerability, though it was still visible in her eyes. He was the one person she couldn't hide from.

“I didn’t mean to be gone so long,” the Doctor said, apologetically. “But you didn’t have to go and throw me a whole funeral! And those songs! Yeah, my last wish was for you to keep singing, but I specifically said it should be a _happy_ tune! _Happy!_ ”

"Happy?" she repeated, anger rising to the surface now that the shock was wearing off. "You think I should've been _happy?_ " When she ran toward him, he had the fleeting moment of hope that maybe she would embrace him, but then remembered what the look in her eye meant. She flung the sprig of rosemary at him and pushed him violently backwards as she struggled to find words to describe what she was feeling. She opted to express herself with the first reference that sprang to mind. “You complete _arse,_ Ronald Weasley!” She cast around for something more scathing to say, but her mind was racing. “ _Va te faire enculer!_ _Chikusho! You...you fucking...haleakxsa maetrtrivsa!”_

“Woah woah…” the Doctor said, putting his hands up. “Ginger, _language!_ Pick _one_ , please!”

She fumed for a moment, the anger so visibly coming off of her that it was surprising she didn’t burst into flames. “One language isn’t adequate to describe what I’m feeling right now. _Especially_ not English.” Her eyes flashed dangerously. “ _Poshel k chertu-”_

“Your Russian accent still needs a bit of work, I’m afraid,” he cut in. “And don’t start swearing at me in Latin - I’ll think you’re trying to curse me.”

“That’s the _least_ of what you deserve after what you put us through!”

“I know me leaving the way I did probably triggered some abandonment issues with you, but just take a deep breath, Ginger, you’re splitting-”

“Splitting?” She laughed sarcastically as if he’d just insulted her. “ _Splitting,_ Doctor? I'm angry with you so I'm _splitting?_ I can’t be upset, no no! I'm borderline so it's not a _rational_ response, it's all down to me being crazy.”

“I didn't say that,” he tried to reason with her. “And you know I wouldn't say that word lightly. But I think I know by now the difference between you being upset and you splitting. I don't understand why you're so upset with me. I've only been gone a few months and I told you I'd be gone for a while. Can we just talk this out-”

“You wanna talk it out? Let’s fucking talk it out!” She reached beneath her dress and pulled her necklace off her, throwing the key to the ground. “Your bloody key doesn’t work! That night you left, it stopped humming! It was all quiet! The button wasn’t working! And Alex couldn’t get you on the phone! And Thea said her homing beacon to the TARDIS had gone offline! We thought you were _DEAD!_ I was looking _everywhere_ for some sign of you! I had Mr Smith and Sarah Jane combing every angle they could find! Jack helped too, but I even had Alex ask Kira to reach out to some contacts in Japan because that's how desperate I was! But you were just gone! Fucked off to god knows where!”

The Doctor suddenly understood. It wasn't just Ginger jumping to a worst case scenario, she'd had plausible evidence to back it up. “Oh. Right, well, I see what happened. I crashed my ship, the night I saw you last. Had to completely rebuild it. Lost all access to communications, it probably would’ve knocked out the uplink to Thea _and_ your key. You know, I _thought_ Alex was being unusually quiet, but it didn't occur to me that I'd knocked out the communications beacon. I can fix that.” He hated the way she was looking at him. This might be the angriest she'd ever been at him. He knew what that meant. “Listen, I’m so sorry I hurt you-”

“You hurt me?” she laughed, instinctively pushing him away to preserve her dignity. She shoved any anger down and tried to adopt a more apathetic tone. “Don’t be stupid. This isn’t about me. It's not like I care.”

There it was, just as he'd predicted. She was splitting. “Don’t you?”

“No!” she was defensive now. “It’s not like you owe me anything. We weren’t like...together or anything. If we’d been in love or whatever that would’ve been different, but...We're two separate people. I’m not upset that you did this to me, but how could you do this to Alex? To your daughter? You let her think you were dead for _months_ while she had to deal with how _I_ was feeling...That’s just cruel. You told her you care about her, you promised you wouldn't abandon her like every other parent she ever had, then you disappeared.”

He knew that this was a mask over her real feelings, but felt the truth in it all the same. "I-I'm sorry...I didn't think-"

“What’s going on, what’s happening?” Alex asked, rushing into the room with Thea and the Jack and the rest of the Bannerman Road crew behind her.

“We heard shouting,” Sarah Jane interjected.

Ginger didn’t take her eyes off the Doctor. She gave him a few more choice insults in Gallifreyan.

“Woah, alright,” the Doctor said, a little stung. “That was a _little_ uncalled for, don’t you think?”

That’s when Alex realized what was happening. “Oh my god.” She turned to Sarah Jane. “What? No ‘told you so’?”

Sarah Jane smiled at the Doctor. “It only takes one time being tricked into a fake funeral for this man to be skeptical any time someone tells you he’s dead. Good to see you again, Doctor.”

“Likewise, Sarah Jane,” the Doctor replied. “How do I keep crashing my own funeral? It’s getting to be a problem. I did the same thing on the way over here.”

"Ah, so that's where you are in the timeline," Sarah Jane acknowledged.

"You've seen this Doctor before?" Alex asked. 

Sarah Jane nodded. "That's why I didn't have a doubt he was out there somewhere, but giving away too much might damage the timeline. You can never be too careful."

Alex wasn't looking at him and the Doctor remembered what Ginger had said about her having to feel all her emotions these past months. “Alexia Mitchell, all grown up,” he smiled, moving forward to hug her. She flinched away from him and refused to look at him. He frowned. “Everything alright, kiddo?”

“Yeah, fine,” she said, still looking anywhere but at him and shifting uncomfortably. “Absolutely bloody brilliant. You’re alive, it’s all good.”

“You don’t seem..." He glanced between her and Ginger. "Well, neither of you really seem as _happy_ about that as I’d anticipated.” 

“What?” Alex scoffed. “Course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”

The Doctor was definitely concerned. “...I dunno. Look, I’m sorry for...everything. I was just explaining to Ginger that I crashed the TARDIS the last time I saw you. I didn’t realize when I was rebuilding it from scratch that it had knocked out communications and homing beacons for you lot. We could pop round to the TARDIS now and fix that? I parked it not too far from here.” He looked at Thea. “You should probably stay overnight for calibrations.”

“Agreed,” the robot replied, brightly.

“Doctor, before you go,” Sarah Jane began. “A word, please?”

…

She led him away from the others before speaking. “Doctor.” Her tone was low and hushed, but not unkind. “We’ve got to stop doing this.”

“Stop doing what?” he asked.

“This thing where you die and come back...it’s too much whiplash. Not for me, but for the girls. They can’t handle it.”

“Have they been alright?” he asked, anxiously.

“No,” she said, honestly. “I’m sorry, I know I should sugarcoat it and I know that they would hate that I told you this, but they’ve absolutely _not_ been fine. Alex has _barely_ been keeping herself together and Ginger, well...She spends more time here with Mr Smith than she does anywhere else.”

“We always knew this was a risk, Sarah Jane,” he pointed out. “You’re the one who urged me into getting involved in Alex’s life. Are you regretting that?”

“Absolutely not,” she said. “She needs you in her life. And yes, we all accept the risks. But please be more careful to not let her think you’re dead. It’s one thing to leave it open ended as you have with me in the past - letting me believe that you might still be out there somewhere even if you might not be. That’s comforting. But people insisting that you’re dead all the time...that’s too much. You understand?”

“I’ll try to be more careful.”

“No you won’t. I know you too well, Doctor. But pretend to be, for their sake. How can they move on with their lives with this constant uncertainty?”

…

Jack took Ginger aside. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," she lied defensively. "Bit of whiplash, but that's life."

"I can wait around and give you a ride home," he said. "If this is too much."

"It's not," she said. "And it's fine. I don't care. Travel by TARDIS is more efficient anyway."

He observed the sullen way she avoided his gaze and looked anywhere but at him. "Sure. Efficient. It's not that you're secretly glad to see him and don't want to let him go yet..."

She glared at him. "I'm not glad to see him. He's pissing me off."

"Just like old times," he said.

She fought the urge to roll her eyes. "Leave me alone."

...

“Where did you park the TARDIS?” Ginger asked. “It had better not be far-”

“I know, I know, you _loathe_ walking,” he said, smiling at her then stopping quickly when he noticed she was obstinately refusing to look at him and had kept her arms folded. They turned a corner. “All aboard?”

The TARDIS, at least, looked exactly how they remembered it. Ginger's heart leapt particularly at the familiar sight.

"Hey old girl," she whispered as she gently stroked its side paneling. "I missed you."

 _Missed you too,_ the TARDIS whirred.

The Doctor watched this exchange with an overwhelming sense of fondness and nostalgia. This was as it always should be. Ginger Roswell and the TARDIS. 

Ginger smiled. "Heard some asshole crashed you. You didn't deserve that. You should be treated better."

The Doctor recognized the thinly veiled criticism and crashed heavily back into the present. He bit back the obvious retort and decided to let it go for now. "Let's get going then." He unlocked the door and held it open for his two guests. Once inside, the sense of nostalgia completely disappeared.

“It’s different,” Alex said.

“Don’t like it,” said Ginger. She squinted around at the bright orange interior. "Too bright." She added an aside to the TARDIS. "Not that this is a criticism of you, of course. You're beautiful as always."

The Doctor was a bit stung by this, but tried not to show it. “I had to rebuild it from scratch. Thought I should redecorate.”

“That was your first mistake,” Ginger said, trailing her fingers along the new console. “Look at that. All shiny and new. Not even a little speck of dust. No character at all.”

He rolled his eyes, determined not to show her that he was bothered by this. “Yeah, well, sorry I had to clear out the cobwebs for you.”

“I think it’s lovely,” Thea said, brightly.

The Doctor clapped his hands and looked at the robot appreciatively. “See? Thank you, Thea! At least _someone_ has good taste!”

“Likelier that you programmed her to agree with you,” Alex mumbled.

“Now that would be no fun,” the Doctor said. “Give me _some_ credit, Alexia.”

“It’s all fresh-faced and new,” Ginger said. She peered at him from the corner of her eye. “Not even broken in by the looks of it…”

“Oh that reminds me!” he said, brushing past her. “Installed a new proper sound system! Multi-tiered and leveled! AUX cord, CD port, cassette port, vinyl and 8-track...I’ve even got a gramophone in the back I can pop back and get-”

She shook her head. “No thanks. Bit tired. Too much to adjust to.”

“And Alex!” He rushed back towards her, and she backed away quickly from the sudden advance. He stopped short, catching this. “Sorry. Just...Got excited. Installed a mini arcade for you in the console.”

“You did what?” she asked, having to admit she found the idea sort of enticing.

He grinned and pressed a few buttons. A panel opened up, reminding her a bit of Mr Smith as it did so, revealing a tiny 8-bit arcade screen and some joysticks. “For long trips, you know?”

If this had been a few years earlier, she would’ve been very excited. “Actually, I’m a bit exhausted right now, Doctor. Thanks for the, erm, consideration. It’s all too new. I don’t know how to feel about it yet.”

He was a bit stung by this as well. “Ah well, that’s to be expected, I guess. But ‘Doctor’? That was a bit formal, don’t you think?” She didn’t answer. “Alright, then. Let’s get you home.” He turned to Ginger. “I’ll keep your key overnight to recalibrate while I’m resyncing Thea.”

“Kinky,” she rolled her eyes. “Let’s just get on with it, shall we?”

His eyes lingered on her a moment later as he tried to find the right words to say to fix this. She was pacing slightly, looking around at the new TARDIS interior with an unreadable expression. He decided to say nothing at all. He turned back to the console and set their course.

Ginger was still pacing when she came across something draped across a railing. "Whose is this?" 

The Doctor looked at her to see that Ginger was holding aloft a denim jacket, pinching it between two fingers like it might be contaminated. Her expression was so carefully neutral but her eyes were filling with a confusing array of strong emotions. She used those eyes to look the Doctor up-and-down before carrying on.

"It's not yours, clearly," she said, voice shaking with barely disguised anger. "You've got the sort of middle-aged art professor vibe going on and this is not _at all_ your size. So whose jean jacket is this?"

"Ginger-" he began.

"Don't jump to any conclusions," Alex said, gently. "Maybe it's something you left behind-"

She laughed indignantly. "Oh you think this could be _mine?_ When have I _ever_ worse denim? Not exactly one of my aesthetics, is it? I wouldn't be caught dead. Besides, he's redecorated. Whoever usually wears this has been here recently." She threw it to the floor.

"Does it matter?" the Doctor asked.

"Is she here?" Ginger asked. "Where is she?"

"Ginger, just drop it, okay?" Alex began anxiously.

"I just want to get a look at her, I'm not going to _do_ anything!" Ginger snapped. She cupped her hands around her mouth. "Hello! Anyone out there? You can come out now! I promise to behave!"

"You've never behaved once in your life and you know it," the Doctor said, in an attempt at humor.

She glared at him and he shrank away. "Be that as it may," she said slowly, putting special emphasis on every word. "I just want to see the new girl."

"Just because there's a denim jacket means I've got a girl with me? Bit narrow-minded of you. Lots of genders wear denim."

"It's your pattern," she said. "It's nearly always a girl. They last the longest anyway. The Doctor and his girls."

"She's not here," the Doctor said. "Really, Ginger, jealous isn't a good look on you."

Ginger's voice was even when she replied, but shook with repressed rage. "Jealous? You think I'm jealous? Over what, exactly? You? Fuck you. I want to go home. Get this over with so I can go home."

This saddened him particularly. He remembered a time when the TARDIS had been home to her and now she could get away fast enough.

"Alright," he said.

...

He took them home then parked in a nearby alley so he could do calibrations on Thea.

“They just need some rest,” he said. “They’ll be sorted in the morning. It’ll be back to normal.” Thea didn’t answer. “Oh. Right. Expect it’s hard to answer while you’re still resyncing to the homing beacon.”

“No that’s not it,” Thea said, her hand still firmly lodged within the console. “I was simply doing that therapist thing where I let you work it out for yourself.”

“But you’re not my therapist,” he reminded her. “So you can give me your opinion.”

“You want my honest one?”

“Yes.”

“I’m not sure things will ever go back to the way they were. They’ve been through too much. This whole ordeal was another complete trauma. Ginger and Alex are two _very_ different people with _very_ different traumas, but they grew up as orphans in foster care. You triggered some _major_ abandonment issues. And I know that you’re aware of that.”

“I am,” he admitted. “How have they been? In your opinion?”

“Alex would’ve probably been better if she hadn't felt what Ginger was going through the whole time. You know how Ginger is when she feels something - she’s like a raw nerve, a live wire. Standing too near that...it’s likely to have made things worse for Alex.”

“And Ginger hasn't-”

“No. Ginger wasn’t hurting herself, if that’s what you were going to ask. Though I know she’s wanted to very badly.”

He hated hearing how badly he'd hurt her, but was relieved she hadn't done anything drastic. “And this isn’t breaking patient confidentiality? You telling me this?”

“I’m just telling you what you need to know. Anything else is private.”

“So what you’re telling me is I can’t have things back the way they were?”

She smiled at him in what she approximated to be a sympathetic manner. “Doctor...do you really want to?”


	4. Waltzing Back

Alex opened the door to find the Doctor standing on her doorstep.

"I didn't even knock yet," the Doctor said, hand held aloft in mid air.

"I could feel you leaking in through the door," she said wearily. "Nothing humanoid can sneak up on me. I always feel you before I see you."

He picked up on the phrasing. "Humanoid? So not animals then."

She nodded. "Yeah. Complex sentience only. Which sort of includes cats." She had a feeling that she knew why he was here. "Listen, if you want to talk to Ginger, it's not a good time. It hasn't even been 24 hours yet, she just needs some space. She's not even here anyway - she said she'd be at the record store until at least 3-"

"I'm actually here to talk to you," he said gently. "I thought she might need some space. Maybe we can, as the humans say, 'do lunch'?"

“I, uh…” she said, casting around for a reason not to go. But there really wasn't one. If she was honest with herself, she missed him too much not to go. “Alright. But I’m picking the restaurant."  
  


...

The Doctor watched her closely as she ate. This was his Alexia, his daughter. She couldn't be more a part of him if she'd actually been his biological offspring. But she was acting as if they were strangers.

"I know this is a lot to take in," he said slowly, trying not to let her see how hurt he was while at the same time knowing that she had no choice but to feel it. He always tried to protect her, however irrational that instinct was. "I know I've changed."

"But you still feel like you," she said. "Mostly."

He found this interesting. He'd encountered many empaths in his travels, but had never gotten to know one well enough to carry through to new regererations. "Mostly?"

She shrugged without looking at him. "Just little differences. You're not as..." She struggled for a word. "Desperate. I don't think I realized until I saw you again just how much of a mid-life crisis you were having when I knew you. But you still feel like you. 'Cept you're not burning anymore. Well." She squinted at him. "Not so loudly anyway."

"You can tell a people apart by their emotions?"

She paused in the act of playing with her food as she contemplated how best to answer. She'd never had to explain this to anyone before, so she was struggling to put into words. "Not...exactly," she said slowly. "Sometimes."

"Sometimes as in it only works sometimes or sometimes as in it only works for some people?"

She thought about it. "...The second one? It's like...it's like some people just feel different. It's normally only once I've got to know them that I can recognize them. Like when you know what someone's footsteps sound like. Except more complicated. You and Ginger are different though."

"How?"

"It's not just that I know you well enough, it's that your emotions are so many-layered and complicated. Nobody else feels quite as much as you do all at once. I knew you as much by your own feelings as by how you felt for each other. It was that withdrawal feeling. And that special way she's always mad at you."

"There's a special way?"

"She's all talk, but only ever to you. You know how she is. Keeps her words close to the vest so she can speak volumes to you later, sometimes without making a sound."

"Very observant," he said. "You've always been very observant."

"So have you."

...

They walked back to Alex's flat, but Alex intentionally took them the long way around. As confused and hurt as she was, she still didn't want her time with him to be over.

"I thought about you," he said finally. "Every day."

She tried not to roll her eyes. "Thought about her, you mean."

"One thought does tend to naturally lead to another. You two are so linked in my mind. Entirely separate, always your own...but linked. I wanted to come back for you."

"But you didn't."

"It wasn't the right time. There was a lot going on. A new mystery. I didn't want to put you in that kind of danger."

"I believe you. But I also don't believe that's even a tenth of what kept you away."

He smiled sadly. "Observant again. What do you believe kept me away?"

"Her. Mostly."

"Why her?"

"Because you're still afraid. That's part of what hasn't changed."

"You're still hung up on me changing."

“Of course I am," she said, trying to keep her voice down but not being able to keep a desperate edge from entering it. "I want my dad back! But it's hard to look at you and see my dad. I mean you look barely older than me. You act like it too. So I'm confused and don't know how to act around you. I don't know how we work anymore.”

“You don’t have to sort that out now, Alex.”

“Don’t I? What if you go away again and this time you don’t come back at all? And I didn’t sort it out before you left? I mean you’re so different. I feel like I have to get to know you all over again. You don't act like yourself so it’s like I don’t know you.”

“What do you mean I don’t act like myself?”

They reached her doorstep and Alex turned to face him.

“Doctor, you...I mean..."

Ginger was walking back from the record store with several new vinyl's in hand when she heard the voices. She spotted them before they could spot her and panicked when she saw the Doctor. She wasn't prepared to see him. She ducked behind a tree and started trying to plot a course to her bedroom window that could get her there without being seen.

"You were a good dad," Alex said. "You were the best one I ever had. But when you had the choice between hanging out with me and hanging out with Ginger...Well, at the very least, you would’ve insisted on making me a third wheel. But you specifically didn't invite her today. That’s not what you do. And I thought I’d picked up on it last night, but I was exhausted...But you feel differently, don’t you? The way you felt before...You don’t feel that anymore.”

He just looked at her sadly for a moment. “Yes. That’s true. I don’t feel the way I used to. I’ve got...perspective now that I didn’t have then. I have clarity that I didn’t have before. And you’re what’s important to me now. I’ve changed, but the way I feel about you hasn’t changed.”

Ginger managed to crawl behind some bushes and flattened herself against the wall next to her window. She was trying desperately not to eavesdrop. She started reaching for the window, hoping that she could manage to raise it without making a sound.

“But the way you feel about her,” Alex said, slowly. “Ginger. That’s changed.”

Ginger froze. Gone were all desperate attempts to escape from this situation. She was in it now. A horrible feeling was creeping up on her and she was trying with all her might not to let it overwhelm her. It was almost as if her entire existence somehow hinged on whatever answer he gave.

“Yes," the Doctor said. "I’m afraid it has."

Ginger's stomach dropped and hot tears sprang up behind her eyes.

"Not enough, unfortunately," the Doctor said. "I think the withdrawal metaphor you used before is particularly accurate. But things are different. There's a part of me that will probably always want to go back to how things were, but I know better. We won't work together, not when we're like this."

Ginger had to stop listening - she felt like she’d been kicked in the chest. She gave up on trying to raise the window quietly and let it slam upwards. She raised herself onto the sill.

Alex and the Doctor heard the commotion and exchanged a look before going to investigate. They made it just in time to see Ginger slam the window closed and draw the curtains.

The Doctor knew immediately that he'd made a mistake by the cold guilt that was blooming in his chest. "How much of that do you think she heard?" he asked.

They could hear her begin to putter around on the guitar.

"At least that's constructive," Alex said hopefully. "Right? Channeling it into music?"

He didn't recognize the song. "Maybe."

_"Who gave them the right_   
_Waltzing back into your li-i-ife, your li-i-ife, your li-i-ife_   
_Now I feel fear_   
_I wish that they’d never come he-e-ere, he-e-ere, he-e-ere..."_

It was worse than he'd feared. He took a deep breath. 

"I should go," he said. "I'll come back later when she's in a better mood."

"Yeah," Alex said. "She's pretty impossible to talk to when she's like this."

The Doctor raised his eyebrows. "You're getting to know her pretty well, it sounds like."

She shrugged. "I live with her. What did you expect?" She knew this was bothering him so she smiled gently. "Can I show you something?"

He nodded and let her lead him away. 

...

Alex took the Doctor to see Jack.

"You have the key to that server, don't you?" she asked.

"I do," Jack said. 

"What server?" the Doctor asked.

"He doesn't even know about the server?" Jack asked. "If she hasn't told him, maybe she wouldn't want him to know."

"She'd want him to know," Alex said. "Trust me. She was learning an angry song when we left. We can't leave him like this."

Jack considered this. "Alright, you're the empath. Come to the kitchen, I'll open it on my laptop."

...

Alex and the Doctor remained standing while Jack sat and accessed what was known as the Ginger Demos. 

"What are these?" the Doctor asked.

"You told her to keep singing," Jack said. "And she really tried, though not in public like she should have. She learned a lot of new covers in the first few months you were gone. I kept saying we should make a band, but she wouldn't hear of it. I finally convinced her to let me record rough demos of her. They're really rough, just one takes with her and an instrument. Thea thought they had theraputic value.

The Doctor scrolled down through the list. "There's a lot of Cranberries in here." 

Alex noticed the change in emotions as he clicked on 'Sunday'. "This have sentimental value for you?"

He nodded. "It was our Roswell song." He remembered how she kissed him that night under the alien-themed streetlamp. He noticed she'd also covered 'I Will Always'. He recalled having a row with her then coming back to the TARDIS to find her nearly asleep and listening to that one. He'd helped her back to bed. He suddenly realized that most of these were sentimental songs from their time together.

His eyes welled up a bit and he blinked back emotions.

"The point is that she was doing almost okay," Alex said. "She was getting on with it. Then she thought you'd died. I guess she'd say that was the day the music died."

He understood the point Alex was trying to make. "Can I have the password to this server?"

She nodded. "Of course."

Just then, a brand new song was added.

...

Ginger had given up on playing Cranberries songs for the time being - they were upsetting her and running contrary to how she really felt. She'd searched for a song that could better sum up how she was feeling, and she found one in Beach Bunny's 'Painkiller'.

_"You've been such a jerk_

_Since you left last week_   
_You're careful with your words_   
_But I'm pulling teeth_   
_You said this wouldn't hurt_   
_Give me cavities_   
_And all of your apologies_   
_Are only empty calories_

_After all this time_   
_I start asking why I'm staying_   
_Were you ever mine?_   
_Are we something that's worth saving?_   
_Every conversation puts me_   
_Back on medication_   
_Sometimes, sorry's just another word you're sayin'_

_Do I look like her?_   
_Does she talk like me?_   
_Been feeling insecure_   
_Codependency is_   
_Hard to break when you_   
_Never make it easy_   
_Reconstructive surgery_   
_Can't fix my anxiety..."_

After she'd successfully recorded a take, she put away her equipment and sat quietly on her bed. It helped to get it out, sure, but she still felt terrible. 

"I just need some pain relief," she muttered to herself. Then she remembered that technically she did have a way to do that.

 _This is ridiculous_ , she thought. _You’re being stupid and ridiculous. There’s no way that thing works. And even if it does, why would you use it?_

But the sudden need to remove her emotions was too strong to resist. She ran to the bag and rifled around inside it until she found the Trivscalion Stone. She turned it over and over in her hand as she weighed her options. The way she saw it, she didn't have one. She looked at herself in the mirror and swept her hair over her shoulder to expose her bare neck. She felt ridiculous - she didn’t even properly know how this was supposed to work. What if she did it wrong? She decided just to take the leap. She turned slightly so she could see the back of her neck in the mirrors and pressed the stone to it. The tiny hooks immediately inserted themselves into her flesh as if they were programmed to know what to do. Nothing happened. She just stood there, trembling on the edge of indecision. Cupid had warned her against using this and she wasn't sure that she had the courage to do it. But it wasn’t courage that motivated her to turn the stone. It was desperation. So she turned it once. She watched as the stone turned a pinkish color as some of her suffering drained into it. This wasn’t like being high - there was no euphoria or numbness. There was just...less. Less pain, less hurt, less uncertainty. It was like a tiny amount of her burden had been lifted. But it wasn't enough. What negative emotions were left over were still overwhelming her. So she ignored what she'd been told and turned it all the way to the highest setting. Then there was just...nothing.

...

Alex made a midnight snack later that night.

“Wifi’s gone spotty again.”

She jumped. “Ginger,” Alex said. “You scared me! I didn’t know you were there.”

“I wasn’t,” she said. “I was on Tumblr and the wifi went weird again. Heard you poking around. Came out to tell you I ordered a new router, maybe it’ll fix it.”

“That was...proactive of you,” Alex said, not sure why she felt so uncomfortable. “Listen, I’m awake. Did you wanna talk about something? It’s been a rough few days-”

“I’m fine,” she said, flatly. “Nothing to talk about. I’m gonna go play the Sims. Least I don’t need wifi for that.” Then she was gone.

It was in her absence that Alex realized what was making her so uncomfortable. It was normally impossible to sneak up on Alex - she could feel anything humanoid from a few feet away. But Ginger had snuck up on her. Alex hadn’t known she was there at all - she’d thought Ginger had been asleep. Ginger's aura was gone. It was like she hadn't even existed.

And that was very troubling indeed.

  
...

The Doctor came around a lot in the following days, mostly to try to win over Alex. He was finding Ginger a bit...frosty. And not in her usual way. There was just something off about her.

“You writing something?” he asked her one day, seeing her busy on her laptop as usual.

“Writing? What would I be writing?” she asked, flatly.

“I was hoping you were writing more articles,” he said. “Yeah, I know about those. I’ve actually read your work and I’m impressed. Then again, you always did have the best takes.” She didn’t answer so he pressed on. “I know you sort of stopped submitting a few months ago. You were just starting to get a real format down too, so I wondered why.”

“You really have to ask?” she said, again without taking her eyes off the screen. “I won’t sugar coat it. I was dedicating all my time and energy into finding you. I was horribly depressed. That left no room for writing a hot take about the Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot.”

“So what are you doing if you’re not writing?” he asked her.

“Got a third generation going in Sunset Valley.”

“What’s that?”

“It’s the Sims,” Alex said, coming in the room right at that moment. “She’s been playing for 3 days straight.”

“They keep rebelling,” she said. It was a statement, emotionless. She wasn’t at all disappointed or annoyed by this - then again he wouldn’t’ve expected her to be. He would’ve expected her to be thrilled and impressed by her sentient little creatures. But she wasn’t that either. It was just a statement. 

“Turn the free will off, then,” Alex said. The Doctor didn’t need to be an empath to see that Alex was nervous about something.

“That’s no fun, though,” Ginger pointed out. “Then they do nothing at all. As social experiments go, Sunset Valley sure is an interesting one right now…”

Alex gave the Doctor a meaningful look and he followed her out to the kitchen. “Well, what is it?”

“Don’t tell me you haven't noticed,” she raised her eyebrows. “You know her well enough to know when something is off.”

“She is a bit...frosty,” he admitted. “But I thought that was just her being her-”

“Doctor.” She was becoming frustrated. “The last thing I want to do is get in the middle of one of your rows, but there is something seriously wrong with her! You know Ginger, even when she’s not expressive on the outside she’s having some kind of hurricane on the inside. She can’t help it. She feels everything to the extreme. But I don’t feel anything from her right now! Nothing! The only other person I get nothing from is Thea, and even then I can almost intuit something from her sometimes? She’s an odd machine. But Ginger is blank. When I’m in a room with her, it’s like she’s not even there.”

Ginger walked in the room, making them both jump. She hadn’t heard their conversation.

“Relax, I’m just getting a sandwich,” she said, evenly. 

“Anyway,” the Doctor said. “As I was saying, Dawn Summers was an incredibly unrelatable character. Whiny, selfish...she damseled entirely too much and had no real place with the Scoobies.” He watched Ginger’s turned back for a reaction but got none. “Well? Don’t you think, Ginger?”

“Don’t I think what?” she asked. She hadn't been listening.

“Dawn Summers was extremely annoying and a terrible plot device,” he said, trying to get a rise out of her.

“You’re entitled to your opinion,” she said, finishing making her sandwich. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to go figure out how to kill a Sim baby that I didn’t authorize the existence of. I tried walling it in a room and letting it die, which seemed the obvious solution, but it kept crying. That was distressing the parents. They wouldn’t eat or sleep. So I tried moving them away, but it wouldn’t let me move them with the baby still there. So I moved a rando into the house then moved them out. But they were still distraught over the baby in their new home, especially now child services has taken him. So I might have to delete the whole town and start over. I had such carefully laid plans...three generations, wasted…” She trailed off vaguely as she exited the room.

The Doctor immediately turned back to Alex. “You’re right, something is very wrong with Ginger. Not because she’s gonna kill a Sim baby - she’s very inventive at killing Sims. But I’m ‘entitled to my opinion’? Not if I’m wrong! But this is silly. I mean, this is her time of year! We just have to draw her back out.” He went back into the living room, where Ginger was already playing the Sims again. 

“So Ginger,” he said. “What’s the plan? For Halloween, I mean. It’s only days away. I know you won’t tell us what you’re being-”

“I’m not being anything this year,” she replied, not looking away from the screen.

This floored him more than anything. “Not...being anything this year? But...it’s Halloween. What do you mean?”

“I haven’t really thought about it, to be honest,” she admitted. “Was too busy trying to find you.”

“Well…I’m back now,” he said, at a loss. “We still have time to put together something-”

“Nah, I’m not really feeling it, thanks.”

He and Alex exchanged worried looks.

…

The Doctor and Alex conferred with Jack, who had also noticed the troubling change in her demeanor. 

"There's a Halloween-themed karaoke night down at the pub," Jack said to her.

"No thanks," she said. "Busy."

The others exchanged a collective glance.

“Ginger, how are you feeling?” Thea asked.

“What is this?” Ginger replied, looking around at the Doctor, Jack, and Alex who were all sitting around with worried faces. “Some kind of intervention? So what if I play the Sims a lot? I was placed in this timeline to be a Millennial. We play the Sims for a week straight then get burnt out and don’t pick it up again for 3 years. It’s not a big deal.”

“I wouldn’t be concerned with you playing the Sims,” the Doctor said. “But you haven’t been yourself. I mean you’re not doing Halloween? That’s your holiday! We’re worried.”

She blinked. “What’s there to worry about? I’m coping.”

“Are you?” Alex asked. “Because it’s almost like you’re not here right now.”

“Ginger, you turned down a chance to go for karaoke,” Jack said. "That on top of not being interested in Halloween is concerning. You're not acting like yourself."

“I just don’t feel like music right now-”

“Exactly. Since when have you not felt like music?” the Doctor interjected.

“You should be getting defensive and crossing your arms and glaring by this point,” Alex pointed out. “That’s what you do when you’re confronted. You act like a tiger backed into a corner. So this...this isn’t you.”

“Maybe I’ve grown out of it,” she turned back to Thea. “Maybe the therapy’s working.”

“Therapy doesn’t make you not feel things,” Thea said. “It just helps you process what you do feel. Ginger, with your permission, I’d like to do a scan. Determine if there’s anything outside of your normal parameters that could be causing this. Because your neurochemicals are...Well, stable isn’t the right word. They’re not doing anything. You’re not producing any. Which is not at all safe.”

“What good would a scan do?” Ginger asked.

“At the very least,” Alex pointed out. “It would convince us you hadn’t been replaced by a very realistic clone.”

She considered this. "No, I don't think so."

But Thea did the scan anyway. “Ginger…” she said slowly. “What’s that device on your neck?”

"Nothing," she lied. "And I told you not to do a scan. That's a violation of my rights."

The fact that she was saying this all flatly without any emotion continued to raise alarm bells.

“Ginger, what is she talking about?" the Doctor asked, getting out of his seat to get a closer look. He reached to move her hair out of the way, but then hesitated like he was concerned she might try to bite him if he got too close. But she didn’t move, just kept staring straight ahead. “May I?” he asked.

She didn’t even think about it, she just nodded and gave permission. He frowned, thinking this was concerning - she normally had pretty strict boundaries. He lifted her hair from her neck carefully, laying it over one shoulder as he caught sight of the stone embedded in her neck. “Ginger,” he said softly. “Where did you get this?”

“Cupid gave it to me,” she said, simply. “He said it would help.”

“Wait, Cupid?” Alex asked. “When did you see Cupid?”

“He was at the funeral.”

“Ginger, I disapprove of these when they’re being used responsibly,” the Doctor said. “But you’ve got it turned up to 100%.” Alex and Jack had come around to look as well so the Doctor gestured to it. “This is a Trivscalion Stone. They're sort of gen1 Cybertech."

"Cybertech?" Jack asked. "As in Cybermen?"

The Doctor nodded. "Yes. It's also similar to original design specifications on Daleks. It works by siphoning off the primary emotion at the core of your distress. See how it’s so red it’s nearly black? It’s leeching all her neurotransmitters, draining them into there.” He was suddenly very angry. “Cupid gave this to you? He should’ve known better.”

“He only wants to help,” Ginger said, flatly.

“Well he’s doing more harm at this point. This was incredibly irresponsible. We need to turn this off.”

“No,” Ginger said. She stood up in one fluid motion and crossed her arms. She still wasn’t emoting, so it was a strange effect. “I won’t let you.”

“Ginger, you’ve got to feel something,” Thea said. “You’re an organic lifeform, it’s not healthy to feel nothing.”

“You want me to go back to what I was like before?” she asked. “I was a mess. Why would I want to return to that? At least now I can think.”

“Ginger, that’s not like you,” the Doctor said. “You’re a person of impulse and instinct. If you don’t have that, who are you?”

“Better,” she insisted. “That’s what you all wanted, isn’t it? Me to be better? I was hurting everyone by feeling that much. So now I'm not anymore.”

“Ginger, it doesn't work that way.”

She shook her head. “You’re not taking it.” Jack tried to move forward. “You really gonna fight me, old man?” He stopped in his tracks and she looked around at them. “Don’t be stupid and try to fight me on this, got it?” She kept her eyes on them as she grabbed her coat off the rack. “Gonna go out for some air.”

She opened the door to find Cupid on the other side.

"Thea rang?" he said brightly.

"She did?" the Doctor said, glancing at the android.

Thea nodded. "You're not the only person I have on speed dial," she said. "I thought perhaps if he gave this to her then he knows how to disable it. So I sent a hailing frequency."

Cupid noticed the elephant in the room. "Oh dear," he said gently, stepping toward Ginger. "Your aura is so muted. What have you done to yourself? I did warn you not to."

"You should've known better than to give her something like that," the Doctor said angrily.

“I knew the risk I was taking,” Cupid said. “I was only trying to help. To test her. Unfortunately she failed. I’d hoped I’d be wrong.”

“Sorry what?” Alex asked. “Test her? Why?”

“She has to be made ready,” Cupid said. “At this rate I wonder if she ever will be...But I have such high hopes for her…”

“You're being purposely vague,” Alex said, crossing her arms. “How do we fix her?”

“I don’t need fixing,” Ginger insisted.

“Not generally, no,” Cupid said. “The biggest mistake any civilization has ever made is trying to fix a Ginger. But in this case...You’re doing yourself great harm, my dear, keeping this up. A Ginger’s greatest power lies in her emotions. Whether that power is used to build or to destroy has always been up to individual will. You need to tap into your emotions. You need to very slowly turn your emotions back on so you don’t overwhelm myself.”

“I’m not doing that. I’ve already said that I’m not going back to what I was.” Ginger looked at the Doctor. “You know what I was like. Why would you want me to go back to that? To something you have to worry about?”

“Because I…” the Doctor cast around for something to say. “Ginger, I missed you while-”

“While you were off making me think you were dead?” She raised her eyebrows. “That sounds like a you problem. You could’ve come back.”

“Ginger,” he tried again. “I still miss you. Right now. I just...I want my friend back.”

“Is that what we were? Friends? And even if we were, we’re not anymore, are we? I don’t even know this person you’ve become. You may as well have died. No, actually, you did die. The person I...knew...he’s gone forever. I don’t want to have to feel that loss.”

“Ginger, this is just you splitting-”

“What?" she scoffed. "How can I be splitting, Doctor, I can’t even feel anything!”

“You started splitting so you finished it by doing this. If anything this is splitting the ultimate way.”

“That’s just ridiculous. I told you before, you can’t start saying that every time I do something you don’t agree with. It’s demeaning. I get it, you know. I let you down by now being who you hoped I'd be. You're not exactly the person I want you to be either.”

“I’m sorry, splitting?” Alex asked. “What are you talking about? Is this like a Time Lord thing? Is she like...molting or something?”

“Not a Time Lord thing,” the Doctor said. “It’s a-” Then he stopped in his tracks and half-glanced at Ginger, worried that going on would violate her privacy.

“What’s going on?” Alex asked, looking from one of them to the other.

The Doctor decided that this was best a conversation for Ginger to handle at a later time. “We’ve got to get her back,” he said, turning to Cupid. “You did this, you fix it.”

"She won't give it up without a fight," Cupid said. “Someone will have to hold her down.” He said this as if he found it distasteful. He looked to Jack. “Perhaps you, my fine fellow? You look like you have strong arms.”

Ginger looked at Jack sharply. “Don’t you dare.”

“I’m sorry,” Jack said, crossing the room. He tried for humor. "You know me, I never miss a chance to show off when a man implies that I have strong arms."

“Don’t you dare!” Ginger still wasn’t quite feeling, but she knew she didn’t like this. “Don’t any of you come any closer, I’ll fight you, I swear I will!”

There was a brief struggle while Jack attempted to hold her arms to her side while the Doctor and Alex tried to turn the stone.

“Don’t turn it too fast!” Cupid warned them. “You might overwhelm her.”

“I’m not certain this is safe,” Thea warned them.

“You might need to stand back,” the Doctor said to Alex.

“What? No. I can help-”

“This isn’t about what you can do, it’s about what it’ll feel like for you when she gets those emotions back. If she’s overwhelmed, you’ll be too.”

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take-”

“That’s not a risk I want for you.”

She looked at him for a moment before nodding and backing up a short distance. The Doctor examined the Stone, trying to find the best way to remove it. He reached up for it at the exact moment that Ginger managed to break free and elbow him in the face.

“I told you, don’t touch me,” she said. Then she felt unfamiliar hands encircle her waist, pinning her arms to her sides with surprising strength. She was surprised to find the hands belonged to Thea.

“I’ve had to activate my Emergency Protocol,” she said, seriously. “You are now being prevented from being a danger to yourself and others.”

Ginger looked her over, momentarily distracted. “You’re really strong. You work out?”

The Doctor took his chance to try to turn the stone, but she felt it at the last moment and struggled again. The combined force of the Doctor tugging at it and Ginger pulling her body in the opposite direction caused the stone to be accidentally dislodged from its metal casing and shot across the room.

“Oh no,” Cupid said, scurrying to try to find it. It had rolled partially under a small end table. He picked it up and blew a layer of dust off of it. “Oh dear oh dear, this isn’t good…”

“What?” Alex asked, rushing to have a look. “Oh. Well. Yeah, that doesn’t look good.”

There was a large crack right in the center of the Stone.

“What does that mean?” asked Jack. “I mean it’s just a crack, right, it’ll all be fine?”

“This stone contained every emotion Ginger possessed,” Cupid explained. “The receptacle is damaged, and before anything could be returned to her. I don’t know if it can be repaired.”

This was the final straw for the Doctor. “Well do something! You got her into this, you’ve got to fix it!”

“There might be a way to do it manually,” Cupid said. “The stone takes your neurochemicals and stores them, but in the meantime sends a neurochemical signal to the brain’s natural instinct to produce more. There is of course a risk that if she's been like this too long, we won't be able to turn it back on again-"

"But?" the Doctor urged.

"It might not be too late. You have to find a way to jump-start the process.”

“What with an SSRI?” Alex asked, semi-seriously. 

“Not quite,” the Doctor said. “She’s a Time Lord, it wouldn’t have an effect on her.” He glanced back at Ginger. “What? Not gonna tell me off for lumping you in with my lot? You keep saying that I'm a stranger, but maybe it's actually you.” He turned back to Cupid. “What do you suggest?”

“You need to try to make her remember,” Cupid said. “Stimulate the brain with manual recall.”

“What like sight, smell, taste, sound, etcetera?” Thea asked. “That’s basic therapy.”

“Yes, but the trick is finding something strong enough that it’ll pull her out,” Cupid mused. 

...

They tried everything to draw her out. Sad parts from Harry Potter, cute shipper scenes from shows - hell, they even tried playing Fiona Apple and other 90s music in an attempt to find a pressure point. But nothing worked.

“What if she’s like this forever?” Alex asked, nervously.

“She won’t be,” the Doctor reassured her. “We’ll find a way to get her back. There has to be something.”

They thought they almost got something when they forced her to sing some karaoke, but it was no use. The performance was terrible. It seemed without her emotions, she sang off-key and monotone, and just sort of sat there while she did.

_"I feel numb...I feel numb in this kingdom..."_

“Let’s call it a night,” Thea said. “We’re all tired. We can pick this up in the morning.”

…

But the Doctor couldn’t let it go that easily. He was restless that night, pacing the TARDIS trying to figure out what to do. Finally he latched onto an idea. A desperate one, but what other option did he have?

He knocked on Ginger’s window.

She hadn’t been sleeping either - she’d been sitting at her desk playing the Sims again. She should’ve been startled by the sudden interruption, but instead just barely looked up. 

“Jack, if that’s you,” she said. “You can come in. On the condition, of course, that you stop trying to fix me. But anyone else can go shove it.”

The Doctor opened the window and climbed up on the sill. “Sorry to disappoint,” he said. “You regularly let Jack Harkness in your room?”

“Not often,” she said, not looking away from the computer screen. “Why? You jealous? You always did get jealous.”

He took a second to think of how to respond. “No, I’m not jealous. Just surprised.”

“Did you want something? Because I believe I told you to shove it.”

“And I’d listen, normally, but I wanted to talk to you. Can we go for a walk?"

She thought about this. “Go for a walk? With a complete stranger?”

“I’m not a complete stranger,” he said, his patience reminding her so much of how he used to be. “You know me better than anyone. I know you better than anyone.”

“That’s not technically true,” she responded. “I mean there’s other versions of me flying about and this Trickster fella who keeps trying to use me for stuff...Oh and then there’s Cora who’s had to watch me die over and over again - fun times, I bet...And of course there’s Cupid.”

“None of them know you like I do,” he insisted. “Can you give me the chance to prove that to you?”

She was reluctant. “Fine. Only because I was bored.”

…

He took her for a brief trip in the TARDIS, finally touching down outside of the ruins of some old castle. 

“What, not Roswell?” she said, crossing her arms. "I expected this to be a ploy and the most obvious target would be bringing me back to Roswell."

"I knew you'd see through that," the Doctor replied. "And besides, I want us to always have Roswell. If I taint the memory by bringing you there when you're upset, it'll ruin it forever."

"So what is this place?" Ginger asked. "I've never been here. Why bring me here?"

“Because you like history,” the Doctor said. “You like old gothic castles that are left to crumble to dust. Reminds you of the impermanence of everything. As high as you build your kingdom, it can fall in an instant. Makes you feel like you can stick it to the ghosts of the oppressive rich monarchs that came before you. But more than that, you like ruins. You’ve always gravitated towards the ruined things that you can see yourself in.”

She just rolled her eyes. “What is this? Trying to tear my castle down stone by stone? Save me the Enchant Era theatrics.”

“I just thought it would be a good place for us to talk,” he said, simply. He took it as a good sign that she was referencing things again.

She just kind of looked at him in disbelief. “Alright, your majesty.” She then added under her breath. “Prince Phillip looking motherfucker.” Then she came back to herself. “Whisking me off to your gothic castle and decreeing that we should talk. Did you want us to talk or did you want to talk at me?”

“I do have some things to say,” he admitted. “But I’d like to hear you talk. I’m always interested in what you have to say. I missed your rambling.”

She sat on the edge of a crumbling wall, dangling her legs off the edge. “Yeah, well, you’re weird like that.”

The Doctor thought about sitting next to her, but could tell by her body language that she wasn’t open to it. “So listen,” he said. “Actually I...I don’t quite know where to begin, to be honest. It hasn’t been...easy. My life in general isn’t, but...I mean being away from you. No matter how things have changed, there is one thing that's stayed the same. It’s been tough not being able to talk to you.”

“You could have,” she reminded him, almost sullenly. “I was right where you left me.”

“Left you?” he asked, picking up on her word choice. “Is that what you think I did? After all this? Everything that happened? This was as much your choice as it was mine. And I didn’t leave you. I was always going to come back. It just took longer than expected.” He watched her to see if he was getting any sort of emotional response, but nothing much happened.

“I guess it doesn’t matter,” she said. “It’s all over and done with now. Time to move on. You clearly have. You’ve been out there doing god knows what.”

“I’d like to tell you, if you’d let me,” he said. “If we could just...be friends and talk like we used to. I’d like to tell you everything that happened and everything I’ve gotten up to. And I want you to tell me what you’ve been up to. I told you I read your articles. They were quite good, you should get back into the swing of doing those. I particularly enjoy how you call certain films 'anti-alien propaganda'. And you're not afraid of controversy either. You've attacked Indiana Jones, Star Wars, Star Trek, and Monty Python since I've been away.”

“You can read what I say but you can’t just talk to me?” 

“I admit it was easier to check up on you that way. I didn’t intend to be gone so long. But it doesn’t matter what I intended. I wanted to hear your voice, to talk to you...but I couldn’t yet.” He sat down next to her and didn’t look at her. “Not just because I was so busy, but because I knew how hard it would be for you. And for me, I guess, in my own way. So I read what you wrote. You always were brilliant.” He looked at her then. “Still are.”

Ginger just looked at him blankly. “Doctor...why are we here?”

“I just wanted to remind you of how good we were,” he said, sincerely. “I mean we were quite the team.”

“We were a mess,” she reminded him.

“We were,” he admitted. “But it wasn’t all bad, you know it wasn’t.” He took a deep breath. “I’m so sorry that I hurt you and I'll keep saying that til you believe it. I should’ve known that it would cause you pain. I should know you better than to treat you like just anyone.”

“It’s whatever,” she shrugged. “Not like I care.”

“Come on, don’t give me that,” he said. “I mean...Ginger, I do speak French. And Latin.”

“I was being dramatic.”

“You couldn’t say out loud how you felt, so you put it in another language. Translation gives you plausible deniability. And you did always say that English was barely adequate.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she rolled her eyes. 

“You always liked that I was a little bit ridiculous. It’s alright. I know that you loved me." He ignored her dry laugh and pushed on. "And I loved you. In my own way, I always will.”

“What do you want from me?

“I want you to remember that there are feelings out there that make the pain worth bearing.”

“Like what?”

“Like this.” 

He closed his eyes and kissed her, but she was so shocked that she kept her eyes open and looked at him with disbelief. She didn’t move at all for probably 10 seconds as she tried to understand what was happening, then drew back and slapped him in the face.

“Ouch,” he said. “What was that for?”

“I don’t know you,” she said, simply. “And you think it’s just alright to do that?” There was no anger or hurt in her voice. It was a flat statement.

“Not the reaction I was hoping for,” he admitted.

She tilted her head to the side and regarded him analytically. “What were you hoping to get from that?”

“Well I was sort of hoping that the, uh...It sounds silly to say it out loud…”

“I’m waiting for an explanation, Doctor.”

“Well, it’s the old movie trope thing...the whole, uh...true love’s kiss thing.”

She just looked at him blankly. “Excuse me?”

“I thought maybe reminding you of how we used to feel about each other would bring back your desire to feel something. Evidently, it didn’t work out how I wanted. Maybe before when we were...whatever we were, but...We’ve changed and that’s not enough. I hope you’re at least angry with me.”

“I would be,” she said, slowly. “If my emotions were on, I’d be fucking pissed. You know the issues I have. If my emotions were on, I’d probably be having flashbacks.”

He immediately felt a pang of guilt. “I didn’t consider that, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well, you’re an idiot. Take me home. And don’t get any ideas.”

…

Alex, Thea, and Cupid were still awake and planning their next move when Ginger and the Doctor walked in.

“Well if that’s the best you lot have got, better give up all hope now,” Ginger said. “My emotions aren’t coming back, sorry not sorry.”

Alex stood up. “I didn’t know you left.” She zeroed in on Doc’s emotions. “What...exactly has been happening?” She crossed her arms.

Ginger lounged across and arm chair and kicked off her shoes. “Nothing much,” she said, examining her fingernails idly. “Bet he’s disappointed, though. Turns out that assaulting me doesn’t actually bring my emotions back. Muscle memory, however...that never goes away.”

Alex suddenly understood what Doc’s feelings of guilt were about. “You did what?”

“Look it was just one kiss,” the Doctor explained. “I thought maybe…”

Alex opened her mouth to speak but Cupid beat her to it. “Ginger, could you give us a moment’s privacy?”

She looked up, sharply. “Why? It looks like you’re gonna yell at him and if you are I’d like to request a bucket of popcorn.”

“Ginger, please,” he then turned to Thea. “Thea, if you could maybe escort her somewhere that is else-”

She suddenly sat up properly in the chair. “Oh no you don’t. You don’t get to pawn me off on the robot-”

“Ginger, you’re not helping the situation, could you leave us?” he asked, exasperated.

She scoffed, almost but not quite looking like a sullen teenager. “You’re not my dad. You can’t tell me what to do.”

Alex glanced at Cupid out of the corner of her eye, she could tell he was stung by this comment. 

“You’re right,” Cupid replied, patiently. “I’m not your father. And even if I was, I have no right to order you around. Especially not in your own home. So if you’ll excuse us-”

Ginger realized what was about to happen a second before it happened. “Wait, wait, don’t you dare-”

But Cupid linked arms with Alex and the Doctor before snapping his fingers. Alex would describe the feeling later as if the universe had passed through her and she had passed through it. Water through a translucent fabric. Everything blurred and sharpened and went out of focus until she found herself once more on dry land. Cupid let go of them and Alex stumbled a few paces away.

“Woah,” she said. “Where are we?”

“Somewhere in Wales, I expect,” Cupid replied. “I didn’t really think, I just knew we needed a quiet place to talk away from prying ears. I have a tendency to naturally return to Wales.”

The Doctor was giving him that look again. “Who are you? What are you? You never say.”

“Have you ever thought that perhaps that’s because I don’t rightly know the answer myself?” Cupid asked. “We all start out one thing and end up another. Perhaps there isn’t one neat word to describe what I am. But that’s not important now.” His voice got low and even, as if he were trying not to get angry. “Start at the beginning, Doctor. What happened?”

He felt oddly defensive - something about Cupid made him feel like a teenager getting caught doing something naughty by an adult. “Nothing happened,” he replied. “I was just trying to...Well, you know! It was desperate, I know, but I thought...It works in the movies…”

“What works in the movies, Doctor?” Alex asked.

“You know,” he turned to Cupid again. “The kiss. True Love’s kiss. I didn’t really expect it to work, but then again...What if it turned out to be right and I didn’t try it? You understand.”

“No I don’t,” Cupid said, struggling to keep his voice steady. “And by the sounds of things, neither do you. Do you have any idea how foolish that was?”

“Foolish? How was it foolish?”

Alex suddenly understood the full magnitude of what was happening there. “You're such an idiot. What did you think would happen?” she asked, voice rising. “No seriously, I wanna know how you thought that would play out. Let’s say, hypothetically, that True Love’s kiss worked. Then what? You gonna stick around again? Or even whisk her away again? You gonna be the happily ever after for her? Because you two said you were done. And it hurt her. God, just...You have no fucking idea how that felt for her. Especially when she died. So what, you were gonna make her come back to herself with a love that you’ve even admitted has changed this time around...then what? You’re gonna fuck off again? Make her feel for you, make her remember how much she loved you and how easy it would be to fall for you like that again, then just leave her like that? Leave the rest of us to clean up the pieces because you can’t be bothered to help?”

“I didn’t think it through,” he admitted. “You know how it is with Ginger...She makes it hard to think things through, you just sort of act on impulse…”

“And your impulse was to hurt her?” Cupid asked.

"I wasn't trying to hurt her and you know it!"

“It doesn't matter what you were trying to do, you should know better," Cupid said. "The point of all this was to make her safe. But evidently she's still not safe from you."

“What right do you have to lecture me? You're the reason she's in this situation in the first place! I thought you of all people would understand what I was trying to do! It’s about love! Gambling on the fact that love is powerful enough to bring someone back!”

“It’s all terribly romantic and in any other context I’d find it charming, but Doctor…” He sighed and suddenly appeared quite weary. “The context we’re in prohibits that. You don’t match anymore. I mean you do, your auras haven’t changed color, it’s just...your energies are so different. And you know this. You’ve felt it. You’ve felt how things have changed, you’ve gotten that perspective. That doesn't mean it has to be like this forever, you just aren't in the same mental space anymore. This is always what I was afraid of. You know when I first found out that you two were being thrown together, I tried to stop it. I mean, for God’s sake, Doctor...She’s far too young for you. And your ex-best friend’s daughter!”

“That never seemed to bother you before-”

“That’s because I had no choice. I had to go along with it for the sake of our safety. But you're right, I eventually got on board when I saw what you could be. What you never got to be. In any other context, I would’ve put a stop to it because it would be disgusting but...You two could be something. And either one or the other of you always ended up dying before you could reach the optimal point for it to work out so I thought...Why not let her be happy? If there’s a chance she could just have some small happiness. Sure you weren’t healthy in your last life, but you could be in this one. But not now. Perhaps someday when your energies match again and you’re not just leeching off each other. Doctor...I don’t think this is that regeneration. And neither do you. True Love’s Kiss...You must’ve been out of you mind to think you could pull that one off.”

...

Cupid teleported the three of them back to the street outside Alex's apartment.

The Doctor took a few steps forward then turned to face them. "You really think I messed up that badly?"

"Yes," Cupid said. "But it could be much worse. Thank the stars that it didn't actually work or we'd be in way worse trouble. She's far too volatile."

He nodded. "I'll have to go back to the TARDIS and think up a better strategy." He noticed Cupid smiling. "What? You're giving me very mixed signals here."

"It's just a good sign, is all," Cupid replied. "You still want to think up ways to help no matter how bad she gets. Gives me hope for some day in some far-flung future."

"Glad you can have hope," the Doctor said. "Sometimes I don't. Not after seeing what we tend to become..."

"What?" Alex said, catching his vibe. "You feel like a cartoon lightbulb just flashed over your head."

"I have an idea," he said slowly. "But you're not gonna like it. Thea wouldn't like it."

"That's reassuring?" she said. 

"I don't like it either, honestly," he admitted. "But we've tried everything else. There's no way around it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back! I've been reflecting on our past with this story and it's occurred to me that August 18th is the 10 year anniversary of me posting some version of this! So stay tuned, the next part will be up then!


	5. R.I,P.

“Nope, no way, absolutely not.”

The Doctor had managed to track the Red Herring to a small moon thousands of light years away. 

“Why not?” Jack asked. 

“Because I don’t help Gingers,” the Red Herring replied. “That’s just smart policy. You meddle with us and we push back. Besides, I have my own mission. You’re distracting me from my purpose.”

“You can go back to your Doppelginger hunt after you help us,” Alex insisted. “Come on, what have you got to lose?”

“My dignity? My self-respect?”

Just then, a voice from outside the room spoke. “Don’t try to pretend you’ve suddenly got either of those things.”

Everyone turned around to see the Corsair in the doorway. “Hiya, Doctor,” she smiled. “Nice to see you again, Captain Jack.”

“What are you doing here?” Jack asked.

“Didn’t I tell you I was on a Doppelginger hunt?” Cora said, leaning against the doorway. “Well, it’s led me here.”

“She’s here?” the Doctor asked. “Right now?”

“Just shoved off, I’m afraid,” the Red Herring replied. “We just missed her apparently. It’s back to the drawing board and the longer we delay, the harder it’ll be. Even with our combined abilities, it’s hard to find one of us. We’re very good at hiding when we don’t want to be found.”

"I was able to find you," the Doctor pointed out.

"Doctors do tend to have a standing invitation," the Red Herring acknowledged.

“R.H and I have teamed up, I guess you could say,” said Cora. “It’s a weird arrangement, but it works. Mostly. So, tell me...What brings you all the way out here to distract my asset?”

The Red Herring made a face. “Your asset? I’m nobody’s asset, least of all yours.”

“Regardless,” Cora replied. “You have some business here. What is it?”

“Ginger’s in trouble-” Alex began.

“What a shock,” the Corsair said, sarcastically.

“We’ve done all we could think of to get her back,” Alex pressed on. “But she doesn’t want to.”

“What’ve you done?” Cora asked. “Dimensional trickery of some sort? Meddled with her mind in some way? Drugged her?”

“It was Cupid’s fault-” said Alex.

Cora groaned. “Say no more. The old fool is always sticking his nose in where it doesn’t belong. He means well, he does, but nothing good comes of it. Thinks with his heart, not his head.”

“We just need the Red Herring’s help-”

The Red Herring spoke quickly. “Absolutely not. You realize what you’re asking me to do? It’s degrading.”

“What exactly are you asking her to do?” the Corsair asked.

“We just need her to pretend to be Doppelginger - the Queen of Hearts - just for a little bit,” the Doctor explained. “Scare some sense into her.”

“And you think that would work?” Cora raised her eyebrows. “Ginger isn’t scared of Doppelginger. She’s furious with her.”

“And from what you’ve said,” R.H replied. “She’s turned her emotions off anyway.” She turned back to the Doctor. “You know her, or at least you used to. You think you can activate self-preservation instinct in that one? She’d need to have that instinct to begin with.”

“Exactly,” the Doctor replied. “We’re not asking her to preserve herself.”

The Red Herring caught on slowly. “Oh that’s...that’s brilliant,” she breathed, in a way that was strangely reminiscent of the way the Doctor’s previous regeneration used to say that word. “No I mean it, that is really quite clever. But I still don’t want to do it.”

“Why not?” Jack pressed. “Think of it as the ultimate acting opportunity.”

“Like a Clone Swap or one of those switches they did in Fringe,” the Doctor tried to tempt her.

“You don’t understand…” the Red Herring said in a soft voice. “I can’t play that character. When I get into character, I have to...I have to commit to it and…”

“What, you’re scared you’ll go method?” Jack asked. 

“You don’t have to go all Jared Leto, just help us,” Alex pressed. But she was getting very weird vibes from her.

“You don’t get it,” she said softly. “You’ve never had to be her.” She turned to Cora. “You should know better than anyone. After what she did to you.”

Cora just looked at her for a moment before nodding. “What, killing me that one time? Please. Like I’m special for that. What she did to you...that was worse.”

“I can’t go there,” the Red Herring said. “I can’t be that person. I know I have the capacity to because I’ve gotten so close to it before. Don’t make me play the villain.”

“You wouldn’t be,” Cora reminded her. “You’d be stopping this universe’s Ginger from heading down that road. You said she turned off her emotions? Can you imagine how dangerous a Ginger can be when she’s not held back by her emotions? Because I’ve seen that first hand. You don’t want that.” She stepped properly into the room and looked RH full in the face. “You can help her. You can play the hero.”

“Do we have time for that?” she asked, nervously.

“After nearly 600 years you still ask that question,” she rolled her eyes. “You should know there’s always time.”

“Please,” the Doctor said. “Please just help my friend. I can’t lose her, not like this.”

The Red Herring closed her eyes, clearly overcome with something about that statement. “Alright,” she said. “For you. As a favor. But don’t ever ask this of me again.”

…

Ginger was kidnapped in the dead of night and awoke strapped to a chair in a dark room with one single light blinding her from above.

“Hello?” she called, seeming completely unruffled by this development. “Anyone out there? You should know I’m not into bondage.”

The others were hovering in a nearby glass booth and watching it all from this vantage point. The Red Herring was putting finishing touches on some rough stage makeup on Alex's face.

"I'm not the best at this stuff," she admitted. "This will be really rough. But we'll keep you in low-light so she won't notice. Cupid's better at this stuff, but we can't ever tell him we did this. He'd string us up."

“I don’t know if we should do this,” the Doctor said, in a low voice. 

“I know,” Alex replied. “I don’t like it either. Thea wouldn’t like it.”

“Which is why we didn’t tell her the full plan and left her on standby at your place,” the Doctor said. “Talk about a guilty conscience. I just feel like we’re...like we’re gaslighting her. And she’s had so much of that already. Too many people lying to her and messing with her head. Don’t want to be one of them.”

“And what does that mean?” Jack asked. “Sorry, but none of you ever say just what exactly happened to her.”

“That’s her business,” the Doctor said. “I already feel like I’m betraying her enough by doing this. I won’t add to it.

“Not having second thoughts, are you?” Cora asked, sweeping into the room. “Because we’re ready to go. Can’t have you getting cold feet. A guilty conscience could kill this whole operation. It was your idea.”

“No, no second thoughts,” Jack said. 

“I need to hear him say it,” the Corsair said, searching the Doctor’s face for the slightest bit of hesitation.

And hesitate he did. “...No second thoughts. I’m all in. It’s the only way.”

That’s when Cora noticed the Red Herring. “For God’s sake,” she said, noticing the way she kept fidgeting. “Can you stop looking so uncomfortable? Doppelginger has more confidence than that.”

“I haven’t worn a dress in several hundred years,” she said, irritably. “I forgot how impractical they were. I actually used to like wearing these? I feel exposed and like I can’t adequately fight or run in this thing. Besides...I feel like I’m gonna fall out of the top.”

“It’s a standard cabaret dress,” the Corsair said. “That’s what she wears. Just because you can’t wear a hoodie and jeans for this role-”

“The extensions are uncomfortable-”

“Stop fidgeting with them, then,” she replied, exasperated. “And you need a little lipstick. The Queen wears lipstick. Lucky for you I picked some up.” She tossed it at her. The Red Herring looked at it distastefully before sighing and applying it.

“I hate this, it feels gross,” she said once it was on. “I really used to like wearing this stuff?”

“For God’s sake, fix your posture,” Cora said. “Really embody the character. You look all stiff...That’s...better, I guess.”

“I don’t know if I can do this,” RH said, nervously.

“Look, I can’t do that pep talk thing,” Cora said, impatiently. “You’ve just got to get this over with.”

The Red Herring seemed to find those words strangely motivating. “Fine. Rip the bandaid off.”

“Careful,” Jack said. “You’re sounding very American.”

She glared at him before descending the ladder into the room that Ginger was in. She made her way toward her doppelganger until she was partially visible in the light.

“Finally,” Ginger said as she spotted her. “I was beginning to wonder if I hadn’t been left here to rot.”

“That’d be the least of what you deserve,” the Red Herring said, trying her best to embody the character. “Look at you...You’ve gone soft.” She was grateful to still be hidden in shadows, because she sort of flinched and glanced back nervously at the others. Alex gave her an encouraging thumbs up. She turned back to Ginger with a new resolve. “I warned you. I tried to make you ready. And for what? Just to be another failure?”

“What because I choose not to parade around making a spectacle of myself?” she raised her eyebrows. “I do just fine. So what if I don’t live the rockstar dream like you did-”

“I don’t mean about that, though I do think it’s talent going to waste,” the Red Herring replied. “Our kind shouldn’t be forced to live in shadows. We should be out there, in the spotlight. Not hiding like scared children. You realize there's no way you're going to be able to sing or act anymore? You can't fake emotions when you don't have any. So what are you so afraid of?”

“Nothing, not anymore,” she replied, lounging in the seat as if she were perfectly relaxed. “You should try it. Having no emotions is just...well, I wouldn’t call it bliss-”

“You sounded just like him there,” the Red Herring said, before she could stop herself. She’d felt the words hit her hard and had to struggle to stay in character. “When you said ‘well’ like that...That was 100% how he’d say it. Every time. Off-hand. Sometimes a bit flippant. Always thinking, quick thinking. And he’d be running his fingers through his hair…” She shook this off and tried to think of a way to save the act. “Too bad you’ll never see that again. Because you failed.”

She laughed. “Failed at what?”

“I told you to protect him,” she tried to imitate the rage Doppelginger always had. “I told you that he wasn’t safe and that it was your job to keep him safe. But you’re just like the others. Too weak to do what’s necessary.”

“Too weak to do what?” Ginger asked, still not rising to it. “Dope my Doctor and hold him captive? I’m sorry, but you know it’s true, that he’d rather be dead than live like that. Maybe you’re the weak one. Couldn’t let him go. Just spending all the rest of your eternal life obsessing over someone who didn’t even really love you.”

The Red Herring surprised even herself by slapping Ginger. “Don’t you ever say that! You don’t know what you’re talking about!”

Ginger just laughed. “Alright, kitten’s got claws,” she said, evidently still unruffled. “Struck a nerve there, did I? Come on, tell me honestly - you do feel just that tiny bit guilty for what you did to yours. I know you do. You see the damage you did to him and it just kills you. Just eats you up inside, more than anything else ever could. I got lucky. I can turn that off. But you...you deserve to live with it until it swallows you.”

The Red Herring slapped Ginger again then grabbed hold of the front of her shirt as if poised to do it again. “You got lucky? LUCKY? You know, you're right! But you have no idea how lucky you have it! You want to turn off your fucking emotions, then fine! Have at it, you ungrateful bitch!”

“Please, you can’t scare me,” Ginger replied. “It’s sad that you would try. I’ve got no emotions.”

Alex could see that the Red Herring was losing her grip. “We should pull her out of there.”

“Wait, wait,” Cora said, holding up a hand.

“Do you know how many Gingers have killed to even have half of what you have?” the Red Herring asked her. “Do you know how many of us have died for it? Just to make him safe? So you’re going to punish yours because he’s not the man he used to be? I’d do anything to have mine alive again. Anything. But there's nothing left. Just a howling void.”

“Wait, what happened?” Ginger asked. Last time she’d checked, Doppelginger’s Doctor had still been alive.

The Red Herring realized she’d slipped out of character and let go of her, straightening up. “So this is really it, then? You don’t care at all what happens to him?”

“Can’t really care about much of anything these days,” Ginger replied. “Least of all him. Not after he…” She started to say ‘abandoned’, but thought better of it.

The Red Herring looked at her for a moment before nodding. “Alright. Fine. If that’s the way you want it, that’s the way it’ll be." She called over her shoulder. "Bring him in!”

The Doctor, Jack, and the Corsair had also descended the ladder and had been waiting in the shadows.

“Showtime,” Jack said, as he and the Corsair pulled masks over their faces. He and the Corsair grabbed the Doctor and pulled him forward.

“Let me go!” the Doctor said, as he was dragged into the room. He pretended to struggle, but Jack actually wasn’t holding him that tightly to begin with. “Where are we? What’s happening?” His eyes fell on Ginger, who was just looking at him blankly. “Ginger. What is this? What’s happening?” 

“Doctor," the Red Herring said. "So pleased you could join us.”

“You,” he pretended to struggle harder. “If you’ve hurt Ginger, I swear-”

“You’ll do what, exactly?” she tried for a wicked laugh. “Snog me to death? Save it. I know you can’t hurt a Ginger, not even me.”

“What are you doing?” Ginger asked, turning to the Red Herring. “What’s going on?”

“You really don’t care about him anymore?” the Red Herring asked. “It really doesn’t bother you that he’s here?”

“No, that’s his own problem-”

“Ginger, you can’t lie to yourself-”

“I’m not lying, I just know he’s capable of doing whatever the hell he wants. Whatever lesson you’re trying to teach me-”

“So you really don’t care anymore? Fascinating. Really, truly, it’s a new one. A Ginger who just doesn’t have any personal feelings for the Doctor. Never seen that before.”

“I told you, I’m over it. I don’t care.”

“So you won’t care if I kill him, then?”

“What?” Ginger laughed. “You won’t kill him. Gingers can’t kill Doctors. You can’t kill him.”

She shrugged. “He’s not my Doctor anymore. Loopholes. Maybe I should show you how serious I am.” She called over her shoulder. "Bring out the human!"

Alex was dragged into the light kicking and screaming. "Don't tell her anything, Ginger!" she shouted.

"What did she do to you?" Ginger asked, a bit of concern beginning to show through at the sight of the cuts and bruises the Red Herring had created with makeup.

"This is what happens to people who don't comply," the Red Herring said. She gestured for Alex to be thrown to the floor. "We'll leave you three a minute to catch up. If you still won't comply when I return, you'll all suffer for it." 

She left and the Doctor wasted no time.

"I'm so sorry," he said. "I'm so sorry I got you into this. I never wanted to hurt either of you."

"Is this really the time?" Alex asked as she struggled against ropes that bound her.

"Time is what we make it," he said. He noticed that Ginger still wasn't looking at him. "It kills me that this is where we ended up. Reminded of that song - it sort of went like _how did we get here when I used to know you so well?"_ No reaction. "See, you won't even react to that. I hate that this is what I've made of you. I thought we'd always be solid, you and me. We never used to fight like this."

 _Don't oversell it, Doc,_ Alex thought. _She'll see right through that obvious lie._

"So what do you think the play is here?" asked Alex. "What does she want?"

"Punishment, probably," Ginger said. "That's what we're good at, punishing ourselves. Bit boring."

"You're not at all worried that she'll go through with it?"

"You can take care of yourself," Ginger said. She nodded at the Doctor. "And that man, whoever he is, is none of my concern."

"Whoever he is?" Alex repeated. "You don't think he's really your Doctor?"

"I mean he says he is," Ginger said. "But he just doesn't act right. Says the wrong things. My Doctor always knew what to say to me. We never used to fight like this."

"What, really?" Alex asked, unable to keep herself silent. "You're serious? All you ever did was fight. He'd say something and you'd take it the wrong way then you'd have a go at each other. It always drove me up the wall! It was weirder when you _weren't_ fighting! You fought so much that I was able to get a pretty good sense of what that felt like and that's a big reason of how I knew immediately who he was! But you know what? I'm sick of this! I'm sick of being put in between all your drama all the time! You always go on and on about how frustrating it is when people change history to suit their agenda, but then you're out here with this revisionist history? _You never used to fight this way?_ Please. It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows for you and you know it."

The Red Herring was concerned that Alex was about to blow the whole operation so she whispered to the Corsair and Jack: "Pull her out of there."

Jack and the Corsair came forward at once to pull her away. They got her out of the light and she pulled roughly away but didn't try anything else.

"No wait!" Ginger protested. "Wait, where are you taking her?"

"She has a point, you know," the Red Herring said as she stepped back into the light. "You're being ridiculous about this whole regeneration thing. It's such a Ginger hangup to have." She pulled a prop knife from her pocket. "Maybe I'll just end him for good if you don't care for this one."

Ginger blinked and sat forward a bit. “Hang on...you’re not really gonna...this is ridiculous.” But she seemed uncertain.

“If nothing matters to you anymore, then you shouldn’t mind.”

“Wait wait,” the Doctor said. “I’m sure we can...We can talk this through like rational people.”

The Red Herring took a realistic looking prop knife from her pocket and stabbed him in the side right where they’d placed a squib. The Doctor cried out as fake blood poured down his side. He was doing a commendable job - gritting his teeth as if trying to hold it together through pain he wasn’t experiencing. Ginger blinked and swallowed hard, clearly bothered.

“You don’t have to do this,” the Doctor said to the Red Herring. “What’s the point of all this anyway?”

She shrugged. “Bit of fun. Fun to watch her squirm.”

“Who? Ginger? She won’t give you the satisfaction. She doesn’t care about me. She’d let me die just to spite you. We’re practically strangers.”

“That’s right,” Ginger said. “I don’t know this man. He’s not the Doctor. The Doctor is dead.” 

But the Doctor felt hope. The expression on her face wasn’t one of emotionless calm...it was that impassive look he knew so well for when she didn’t want to let anyone know what she was really thinking. That had to be a good sign.

“It isn’t?” the Red Herring said. “You certain?” She took a large metal device that was resting against the wall and powered it up. It started emitting sparks, and she jammed it into him. He jerked and screamed as if he were being electrocuted.

“Stop it,” Ginger said, the words slipping out before she could even realize she was thinking them.

“Stop it?” the Red Herring raised her eyebrows. “Why?”

“Just...it’s a waste of time. No sense hurting the idiot if it’s not going to do any good.” But she did seem bothered, so the Red Herring stuck him again with the fake electrocution stick. He screamed. “You don’t have to do that.”

"Maybe I'll just go ahead and make him regenerate," the Red Herring said. "It's a good thing he's got two hearts, really. Don't know how humans get by with just one."

“How do you get by without even one?” the Doctor asked, selling the angry act almost perfectly. “Where’d you lose yours?”

“I gave it to you.” The Red Herring had lost the plot again. “I gave it to you and you took it with you when you died.”

“You’re delusional,” Ginger spat, almost alarmed by this turn.

“I’m a Ginger,” she replied, in this off-hand self-deprecating way that reminded Ginger so much of her old Doctor. “That’s what we are.” She remembered what she was meant to be doing. “But fine. I’m crazy because I feel something, is that it? Which makes you sane because you don’t? Well, let’s take away that one last thing keeping you together! Why don’t you see what it feels like to be crazy?” And she jumped on the Doctor, knocking him to the floor and began stabbing him with the prop knife over the various squibs they’d hidden.

“No!” Ginger screamed, as her emotions suddenly returned full blast. “No, you can’t do this, let me go! You bitch, you evil bitch!” She suddenly found that the ropes tying her weren’t that tight and rushed to his rescue. She tackled the Red Herring and pushed her to the ground, where she began clawing and scratching at her. Jack immediately pulled her off, but then she crumpled to the ground near the Doctor, sobbing. 

But the Red Herring didn’t reply, she simply sat with her eyes closed and rocked a bit while breathing heavily. 

Jack pulled off the mask he was wearing. “Ginger, it’s alright, it’s okay, it’s me…” He touched Ginger’s arm.

“Jack, where did you-” She was so hurt and confused. “What’s going...He’s dead. Really dead this time.”

“Ginger I’m not dead,” the Doctor said, sitting up. “It was just squibs of homemade blood, like you taught me. I’m fine. See?” He put her hand over one of the squibs and made her taste it. “Just corn syrup.” He put a hand on her stunned face. “I’m fine, really.” He tried for a joke. “Happy Halloween?”

Alex turned could feel that Ginger's emotions had come back on, so she climbed into the tech booth and turned on the lights so she could be out of range. The Corsair took off her mask and crouched down to tend to the Red Herring.

The rage returned full force and he knew immediately that the joke had been a mistake. “What...the fuck is going on here?” She got up quickly and backed away from him. “Don’t fucking touch me.”

He was stung but not entirely surprised by her reaction. “It was the only way,” he explained. “We tried everything else to get you back...but...This was the only option left. We didn’t want to do it. Alex and I went back and forth on it, knowing it was a bad idea...But it worked. You’re back.” He got up and moved towards her but she took steps back. 

She suddenly realized she was on a stage. “Wait this is...This is the Bacchus."

"Where we first met," he smiled sadly. "Thought it was at least neutral ground. I thought about doing this on the TARDIS, but that’s your home, you should never be made to feel unsafe in it."

“How very very kind of you, Doctor,” she snapped, sarcasm flaring. “Traumatize me here in front of a bunch of people but at least it’s not in the TARDIS!” She noticed the Red Herring trying not to hyperventilate. “Oh and for heaven’s sake. Who’s this? Because it’s not Doppelginger. I knew something was off, but this...Oh. Oh I see. Red Herring again, is it?” She didn’t get an answer.

The Corsair poked the Red Herring awkwardly on the arm. “You alright in there? Like...holding it together?”

“I did what you asked me to do,” RH snapped, still not opening her eyes. “I was your bloody Red Herring again. Another trick, another trap. Just like always. I’m never anything else. I did what you asked me to do.”

"I’m sorry.” Cora did genuinely seem sorry. “ I didn’t realize you still...It’s been almost 300 years, I thought you’d…”

“Gotten over it?” She got to her feet, suddenly all business again. She snatched the extensions from her hair. “Yeah, well, I haven’t. It’s every day of my life. It’s all that keeps me going. And now we need to get going, yeah?"

“Yeah,” Cora said, getting up with an odd look on her face. “Yeah, we can...We can get going.” She looked around at the others. “Will you be alright here?”

"Hopefully," the Doctor said. He didn't pay attention as the Corsair led the Red Herring away. “Ginger? You alright?” She didn’t even hear him so he tried again. “Earth-like planet to Ginger? You in there?”

This snapped her out of it, even though she was still very disoriented. “Don’t do that. He always used to say that. It’s insulting to talk like him.”

“But I am him,” he said again, feeling useless. “That’s how I talk to you. I don’t know how else to do this. Look I just…” He’d reached for her, but stopped when he saw her flinch away. This hurt him so he swallowed hard and stopped. “No that’s...that’s fair. I’m very sorry. I don’t expect you to forgive me yet. Ginger, I want you to know. I really did miss you. Beyond reason and beyond words. Because I did love you-”

“That sounds like a you problem.”

He was stung by this and tried to reevaluate his tactic. “What can I do to prove to you that I’m still him?”

“You can...you can change back,” she said, sudden desperation rising. “If you’re really him, you can change back.”

“I’m a Time Lord, not a shapeshifter. You know I can’t do that.”

She looked him straight in the eyes. “Not even for me?”

“I’m sorry.”

This made her angry again so she got to her feet. “Oh but of course you would for her, wouldn’t you? The other girl with the plant name. Rose, was it? Your little human? I bet if she asked-”

He didn't raise his voice as he replied. “Don’t you bring her into this, don’t you dare,” he said as he got to his feet. That was somehow worse for Ginger - she’d expected him to shout back, but instead she got the barely repressed anger. “Now you’re just being cruel. You know, when you lash out like this you remind me so much of your father.” As soon as the words came out, he knew a line had been crossed and instantly regretted it. “I’m - I’m sorry,” he stammered. “I didn’t mean-”

“Oh you did,” she fumed. “You absolutely meant that. And that just goes and proves that you’re not really him. The Doctor I knew would never say something like that to me.” 

"I didn't mean that," he said again. "Just wait-"

“Wait?” she asked, spinning to face him. “You’re telling me to wait a moment? I waited for 3 months! How much longer do you need?”

“I just, I think we need to take a breath, here-”

“Don’t try to tell me what to do!” she spat. “But you know what, if you want to talk, let’s talk! Why don’t you enlighten me and tell me just how exactly I remind you so much of the Master. Hm? Why don’t we start with that?”

“I didn’t mean-”

“You said I remind you of my father, so let’s have it out, then! Is that why you didn't come back? Can't stand to look at the Master's daughter! You'd rather go hanging around with some new girl than have to be in the same room as me!”

"I don't understand why you're so hung up on my new companion," he said. "She's not a replacement for you, you know! Nobody ever could be! You haven't even met her, so I don't understand what you're so jealous of!"

"I've told you, I'm not jealous!" she fumed. 

"Then what? What's your problem with me having friends?"

"I don't have a problem with you having friends!" she shouted. "I have a problem with the fact that you _ghosted_ me!”

“Now hang on,” the Doctor cut in. “What does that mean, ghosted?”

She'd heard the term thrown around a lot since she'd been back on Earth, but she'd never taken the time to learn what it meant. “It means you disappear for months then just turn up to haunt your own funeral!”

“That’s an oddly specific bit of slang-”

“I might’ve missed a couple years of memes and linguistic evolution, but I think I know what ghosted means!” She cast her eyes about for the one person she hadn't seen yet. "Alex will tell you! Come on, Alex, tell him that's what ghosting means!"

There was a short pause before Alex tentatively brought up the intercom in the tech booth. "Actually, that's not _exactly_ what it means..."

Ginger ignored this. "I don't know how you can be so thick, Doctor," she said. "You really think I have a problem with you having friends? You think I inherited jealousy and possessiveness from the Master? That's what you think of me? No, that must be it, right? I can't have a legitimate reason to be upset. And maybe I _am_ splitting, but maybe I feel how I feel! You died! I really truly believed that! And you let me think that! You obviously don't care about us at all because you didn't have time to come back and tell us you were alright but you had the time to pick up a new companion! She must've been there a while to be comfortable enough to leave her jacket lying around! So you had time to come back and check in! You just chose not to!"

Now he finally understood, and it broke his hearts to hear it. "I'm really sorry," he said earnestly. "I understand how that must've hurt you."

"Do you?" she spat.

"And I made you think I was dead again now," he said. "Retraumatizing you. I didn't want to. I have no excuse. But you've always been so strong. I thought you could handle anything. I put way too much on you, just as I always did. Always expecting you to do the emotional heavy lifting. But you keep saying that I left. That was a decision we made together. You were the strong one, you let me go that night when I went to meet my destiny. Your willpower was stronger than mine. I admired that about you. How you could make the right decision even when it was hard for you. That's what I had to hold on to. My brave Ginger, my angel of music..."

She found herself blinking back tears as she felt a pain in her hearts. She tried to hold onto her anger. "Angel of music?" she fumed. "Alex? You still remember how to fire up a sound board?"

"Never forgot," Alex said tentatively. "But are you sure..."

"Do it," she said firmly. "He's still not getting the point. Go to my karaoke playlist and select the Bikini Kill song whose title seems best suited for a funeral."

"That's very vague-" Alex said.

"You'll know it when you see it," Ginger said. "Take a seat, Doctor. Your angel of music commands it."

The Doctor reluctantly stepped down from the stage and took a seat in the audience. He knew that whatever this was couldn't be good, but he also knew this was the best way to really understand what Ginger was feeling. She was trying to communicate. The least he could do was listen.

She found a mic stand backstage and assembled it in center stage, managing to turn on the mic just as Alex found the song. It was a rock number with lots of guitars. Ginger nodded. "Yep," she breathed. "Exactly what I was looking for."

She locked eyes with the Doctor as she began to sing.

_"I can't say everything about it_

_In just one single song_

_I can't put how I feel in a package_

_And sell it back to everyone_

_But wait."_ She held up a hand and opened her eyes to glare at him.

 _"There's another boy genius..."_ She closed her eyes and balled up her fists, which she held tightly to her sides as she pulled the final words from deep within her. _"Who’s fucking goooooone!”_

She waved her hands in the air in cutting motions, tossing her hair about as if she was just on the edge of completely losing control. The music stopped for half a second before resuming and she seemed to regain her tenuous composure. She opened her eyes but looked everywhere but at him. She blinked back any emotion that tried to make it to the surface.

_"I hope the food tastes better in heaven_

_I know there's lots of rad queer boys up there_

_I hope that every time they talk to you_

_They know that they're lucky to be your friend_

_Cuz look_

_There's another boy genius who's fucking gooooooone!"_

She finally snapped her eyes back to his as she was filled with rage again.

_"And i wouldn't be so fucking mad so fucking_

_Pissed off if it wasn't so fucking wrong_

_It's all fucking wrong!_

_It's not fair!"_ She closed her eyes and began stomping her feet and clawing at her hair to punctuate this point. _"It'_ _s not fair! It's not fair! It's not fair!"_

She lost her composure and just thrashed for a moment before the music paused again and she clutched at the mic stand for support.

_"But no one said life was easy..."_

She looked at him again as if daring him to answer her.

_"Yeah but no one said - no one said_

_that nothing's supposed to happen right?"_

She opened her arms wide as if to let them act as question marks to her hypothetical question.

_"No, no one told me anything_

_To prepare me for fucking this_

_There's another boy genius whose fucking gone_

_Don't tell me it don't matter! Don't tell me it don't matter!"_

Her voice rose to a frenzied pitch and the Doctor could swear he saw tears in her eyes.

_"Don't tell me I've had three days to get over it_

_It won't go away_

_It just won't go away!”_

The song ended abruptly and she put her face in her hands and stood completely still.

The Doctor was stunned as he watched the tears flow from her. “I’m sorry. I really am.”

“A lot of good that does me, you’re always fucking sorry.”

He hopped back onto the stage and tried to take her in his arms but she flinched away. "Tell me what I can do to help."

"Don't touch me," she snapped.

She was trembling. He knew he'd likely caused some damage here and she might be experiencing flashbacks.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I really am going to try to be around more. I promise. I shouldn't've stayed away so long. It didn't occur to me that my communications were knocked out..." He pulled something from his pocket. "But you can have your key back. I fixed it! You can come home whenever you like!"

"Home?" she repeated in a trembling voice. "You think that's my _home_ anymore? It's all different! There's no place for me there anymore!" She snatched the key from him and threw it across the room. "So no I don't want your stupid fucking key! You want to know what you can do to help? You can make it all go back to the way it was! If you can't do that for me, then maybe you should've stayed dead!"

She left without saying another word.

...

Ginger made her own way back to Alex's apartment and Cupid was waiting outside when the Doctor dropped Alex off. His arms were crossed and he was glaring with an uncharacteristic ferocity.

"I see we got Ginger's emotions back on," he said.

"Go ahead inside, Alex," said the Doctor. "You don't need to go through more of this."

"I'm done," she said, eyes flashing dangerously. "I mean it. I think we went too far."

"You're right," the Doctor said. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

Alex looked at Cupid. "I hope you give us all hell for this. Him especially. All this Ginger business...I can't even feel myself think..."

She marched inside, leaving Cupid to glare at him.

"This is perhaps the most reckless you've ever been with her emotions," Cupid snapped. "Thea's in there right now patching her up!"

"Patching her up?" the Doctor asked, his worst fears rising to the surface. "She didn't-"

"No, she didn't! That's the problem with humanoids generally - you don't think it's a pressing problem until someone's actually hurting themselves! The hurt on the inside is enough, you know!"

"You're right," he said. "I thought it was the only way."

"It's going to take a lot for her to forgive you," Cupid said.

"You think she can?"

"I think she can. The question is what you'll become if this isn't set right. You think the Queen or RH were bad? You've never seen what a Ginger is capable of if her relationship with the Doctor is complicated. Once you mix in hate to this cocktail, a Ginger can end worlds. We can't afford to get her all twisted up."

"How do I fix it?" he asked desperately.

"For now, you keep your distance," Cupid said. "But don't go too far. If I can get her calmed down somehow, she's going to need you."

"I understand."

"No you don't. But I appreciate that you're trying."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the most cheery chapter for the 10th anniversary special, I know. But I promise this is going somewhere. I do promise you that Ginger does still love him. She's splitting at the moment, but she'll get over it. This part of the arc is a bit of a metaphor for people who quit watching the show when Tennant left. Sometimes we've got to let go of the past and stop idealizing it before we can move forward. The Doctor is still the Doctor, no matter how much he's changed.
> 
> I really love writing this story for you guys. It has changed dramatically from what it was when I first posted it on August 18th, 2010, back on DeviantART. Some elements stayed the same. Her first name is still Ginger. She's still a redhead. She still exists in the same time period with the same Doctor. She's still the Master's daughter. Almost everything else has changed though. 
> 
> My biggest regret is that I stopped watching the show in 2013. I'm playing catch up now, but I'm still only just past "The Eaters of Light" as of a few days ago. Hopefully soon I'll be caught up.


	6. Whenever I Breathe Out, You Breathe In

Cupid walked along the empty street on a dark October night. His pastel clothing made him appear almost ghostly in the light of the moon as he did his best to clear his head. He slowly became aware that he was being followed.

He stopped, but didn't turn around. “I see you've, as you'd say, ditched your warden."

If RH was surprised to be caught, she didn't show it. "Slipped away while the Corsair wasn't looking. She can be so oblivious sometimes. She's getting easier to lose." She caught up with him and they began walking together.

"Not in my experience," said Cupid. "Have you ever thought maybe she's letting you slip away on purpose? Gingers are notoriously difficult to control - they push back on any perceived authority. Giving you the impression that you've given her the slip might be a demonstration of trust. She knows you'll come back."

RH was taken aback by this piece of speculation. "That can't be right," she said. "Trust is such a heavy word. That's not one I use for anyone, and it's definitely not one she'd use for a Ginger. I haven't earned that right. No it's just easier to slip away when she's drinking like this. Puts her right out."

Cupid caught a bit of fluttering in her aura. "And that bothers you? Worries you even?"

RH crossed her arms. " _No._ I don't care. It's none of my business. We all have to cope somehow."

“We do," Cupid said. "We don't always cope well."

"She's gotten worse then?"

He nodded. "Of course she has. She's not even getting out of bed now. She won't talk to anyone. Alex is staying at Sarah Jane's for the moment because she can't handle it, and I don't blame her."

"That bad?"

"Just that bad. Not as bad as what you're thinking. Not yet."

"You're mad at me."

He shook his head. "No. What you did was exactly what I would've expected from you."

"That's almost worse. I've disappointed a Cupid. You might not have been mine, but it still stings."

"She's feeling that grief, whether it's entirely deserved or not. You can imagine what that's like. You've felt the real thing. You know what it can do."

"She's being selfish."

“Now now, cut her some slack. She just lost her Doctor.”

“She didn’t lose him,” RH said, bitterly. “He’s still right there. She’s so lucky, but she’s squandering it. She thinks she lost her Doctor? Bitch can’t even imagine what that’s really like. It might've been better for her if she'd just died like Cora planned."

"I know you believe that-"

"It's the truth. You _know_ how important it is that the Doctor and the Ginger have a stable relationship. Her death at just the right moment in just the right way was always a powerful motivator. It was the only thing that worked.”

"But this worked," he insisted. "Ginger's alive, and the universe worked it out better than we could've anticipated."

"But we don't know what the consequences of her continued existence will be. She's not as stable as you'd hoped she'd be. Swear to me that she doesn't know the whole truth."

"She doesn't know the whole truth."

"If you're lying to me-"

"I'm not lying to her, I know better than that. I've seen the consequences of giving a Ginger that kind of knowledge when she's not ready to handle it. She only knows what's beneficial to her. She's still in the denial stage. Even the things she thinks she knows haven't been fully explained to her."

"You know that if she goes into a meltdown, this could be another-"

"Yes, I know what's at stake," Cupid said, hastily. "I don't think this Ginger is at all at risk for that sort of transformation. She might be pushing away her Doctor, but his past regeneration told her before he left that he wanted her to have a good life. He said it would hurt him if he left and anything happened to her. She's still clinging to that. She'll do anything for him."

"It's still worth keeping an eye on," she said. "We can't get complacent just because the Trickster's trail has gone cold. We can't afford to let our guard down. Ginger managed to thwart his plans this one time. Nobody saw it coming. But we all know that as long as the Ginger exists, the Doctor is at risk of falling into that trap. That should terrify you."

"It does," he admitted. "I spent centuries working on averting this one apocalypse and now we're on the other side. That was a sure thing, clearly defined and laid out. Now I have no idea what could happen. The probabilities are overwhelming."

"Which is partly why the Corsair drinks," RH said. "She's had a lot of the weight lifted off of her, but now she doesn't have a track anymore. She's floundering a bit. The Doppelginger hunt is all she has for a purpose."

"Do you have any suggestions?" Cupid said. "I've been thinking all night, and I can't think of an easy way to help this Ginger."

"I think I might. If you're open to it."

“I'm open to anything. What's your idea?"

“Dimension 7. That’s what we called it, right?”

He was startled by the notion. “No that’s what _you_ called it. Personally I never cared for that name. Don’t know why you always gravitated towards the grunge stuff.”

“That’s beside the point. Think you can do it?”

“Of course I can do it. I’m almost offended that you think I can’t. But, RH, honestly...Is this a good idea? When I first proposed the idea, you wouldn’t even hear of it.”

“Yeah, but that’s because it was for me. This would be for her.”

“But it won’t work. Remember, you were the one who pointed that out. She’ll see through it. You can’t fool a Ginger.”

“That’s exactly _why_ it will work. I’m not saying we need to make her believe it. We just need to show her enough to make her figure it out on her own. Come on, in any other context I’d say it’s an awful plan. But I’m saying, as a Ginger, there’s no other way. This _will_ work. She won't listen to anyone. I had the Corsair run the probabilities. She'll just tell you to fuck off, throw things at the Doctor when he interrupts her learning a Simple Plan song just to spite him, basically ignore Alex, and she'll even roll her eyes at Sarah Jane for good measure. Not even a good old fashioned fight with me or the Corsair will convince her."

"You assume she hasn't already."

"She needs to work it out for herself.”

"I'll ask her-" he said doubtfully.

"Just tell her it's something to help her sleep," she said. "She doesn't need to know what the full process is. If she knows going in it'll spoil the whole experience and she'll get trapped. Remember that's what you were concerned about when you offered it to me before? If she doesn't know it's happening, she'll work it out. That's how it has to be."

He stopped walking and looked at her. "You really have gained extraordinary insight into your own psychology and yet you spend all this time hunting down the Queen. I know what she did to you was horrible, and I'm beyond angry with her about it. But don't you at least understand why she did it?"

"I understand it," she replied. "I'm not certain I'd make a different decision in her position. That's what terrifies me. I don't think I'd be strong enough to do the right thing."

"This Ginger did. There's nothing inside her that you don't also have."

"She's yours. Of course you'd say that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long week, guys, not even gonna lie. It feels like I'm always saying that these days, but the week started out with my electric bill having gone up by $200 (as if I'm some kind of moneybags) and got to the point where today I'm having an actual argument with a lady while in line to get shampoo at the dollar store. It's just not my week. Eventually I might learn how to keep my mouth shut, but maybe eventually people will stop messing with me. IDK both events seem unlikely.


	7. The Living Room

A flash of light - Ginger would describe it later as one of those “fucking JJ Abrams lens flare motherfuckers”. Ginger could hear a song in her head, but it was warped, faint, fuzzy...It kept swimming in and out of focus. She opened her eyes blearily and it faded like it was never there.

She felt weird. That was her first impression. Her mouth was dry and things felt, for lack of a better term, blurry. Everything just seemed shifty and out of focus and she somehow knew it had nothing to do with the fact that she wasn’t wearing her glasses.

She blinked a few more times, trying to shake the feeling of being disoriented. But she wasn’t immediately clear on where she was. She seemed to be in a bed. She couldn’t remember going to bed, but assumed she must’ve at some point. An extraordinarily comfortable one with a blue quilt...so definitely not her own bed. She didn’t quite process any of this - her brain typically took a bit of time to catch up after sleeping.

She’d been facing the wall, but she was a restless type so she rolled over onto her other side. She was immediately confronted man sleeping next to her, his nose only inches away from her own. 

_Woah what the fuck._

She thought this rather than said it - her immediate response to being startled awake was to make no sudden noises. She sat bolt upright and scrambled for her glasses on the bedside table. She jammed them on her face while doing a check to make sure she was clothed. Which she wasn’t.

_What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck…_

Her eyes landed on the surroundings. 

_Wait, I know this place…_

She’d know this place anywhere, she’d been here many times. This was the Doctor’s bedroom, which meant this was the Doctor’s bed. She stiffened, hearts beating fast as she looked slowly at the man next to her and had to keep herself from crying out.

It was the Doctor.

But more than that.

It was _her_ Doctor.

_What the hell is this? What’s going on? I must be dreaming._

She pinched herself.

_No, definitely awake, definitely fucking awake. This is...impossible. This isn’t happening. There’s no fucking way...I don’t...understand…_

She reached out tentatively with one shaking hand as if to touch his face then paused inches away.

_He’s not here, he’s dead, he’s regenerated, what is this…_

“Rabbit, are you really going to sit there and watch me while I sleep? One might almost mistake that for romantic.” 

He hadn’t opened his eyes, but his lips curved up in a smirk as he teased her. She quickly withdrew her hand as if he’d tried to bite it and stifled back a sort of strangled noise. She was feeling too many things at once and was in danger of getting completely overwhelmed.

_That’s him, that’s my Doctor, that’s really him...but...how…_

He opened his eyes. “Alright, you’re staring. What’s that about?”

“You’re...you’re…” She couldn’t quite make words work. “Not here. This isn’t...real.

He smiled and rolled over onto his back to look up at her. “What’s this, one of our games? I’ll play along.”

“You...died. You’re dead, you regenerated-”

He frowned and sat up. “Oh this isn’t a game, you’re being serious. Talk to me, tell me what’s wrong.” He looked her over, properly concerned. 

“You’re not here,” she insisted, shaking her head. “I’m dreaming, that’s what this is, just a dream-”

“Of course I’m here...Rabbit, you’re shaking…” He reached for her and she felt his fingers brush her cheek and it was him. It was her Doctor. Alive. Here. 

“What the fuck?” she said, scrambling out of the bed. “No that’s impossible. You’re not here! I’m not here, so just tell me what the fuck is going on!”

“Ginger, you’ve probably just had another one of your nightmares and you’re disoriented-” he replied, patiently.

She realized she was still standing there naked and looked around for some clothes. She saw her purple jeans and her Garbage t-shirt on the floor, strewn as if they'd been hastily abandoned. “No, I know better than that,” she said, as she began pulling them on. “This is some kind of trick. Someone is messing with me and I don’t like it!” She shouted vaguely into the air. “You hear that? Whoever is doing this, I’m going to figure out what this is and I’m not going to be happy when I do!”

“Ginger, wait, hold on,” the Doctor said, climbing out of bed himself.

“Woah okay wow,” she said, looking away quickly. 

“What is it?” he asked. “What’s wrong?”

“Can you like...put on some clothes or something? Please.”

He seemed to find this amusing. “That doesn’t normally seem to bother you.” He frowned and started toward her. "Rabbit, you're shaking-"

She pressed herself into the wall. "Don't fucking touch me. And don't call me that."

He stopped and put his hands in the air. "Sorry," he said. "Not touching. Wow that must've been some nightmare. Tell me how I can help."

Tears sprang unbidden to her eyes. "You can tell me what the fuck's going on!" she snapped. “Which you won't, will you? You're not real!" She rubbed her eyes and took a breath. "Okay, so this is some kind of trick, right?" She walked around him, but kept him in her sights at all times. "What happens if I open that door?”

“I'm not sure what you mean."

“They’re obviously trying really hard to get me to not leave the room.”

“Are they?” he asked.

“Yeah obviously! So what's really out there?” She glanced back at him before quickly away. “Some clothes, please, you absolute demon!”

“Normally you play the demon, but if you find something here tempting-” He began dressing himself.

“Oh for god’s sake,” she snapped. “Forget this. If I end up in some kind of Beetlejuice hell dimension, that’s a risk I’m going to have to take.” She quickly opened the door and strode out into what seemed like the same hallway she’d walked down a million times before. “Alright, so no hell dimension. Good to know.” She began making her way to the control room.

“Ginger, wait, where are you going?” the Doctor asked, following close behind with clothes in hand.

She couldn’t help but glance back. “For Illyria’s sake! Please finish putting some trousers on! What if Alex comes round and sees you like that?”

“Alex?” he asked, confused. “Who’s Alex?”

“Come off it,” she said, dismissively.

“No really, I have no clue what you’re talking about. You’re not making sense.”

They reached the control room and she turned to look at him. “Alex. Alex Mitchell. Your daughter.”

“My daughter?” he asked. “I haven’t had one of those for a very long time. Unless you mean Jenny? Except I can’t remember us ever talking about Jenny-”

“Jenny? Who’s Jenny?” she snapped. “I’m talking about Alex. You know, the human you adopted?”

He looked at her as if she’d lost her mind. “Ginger, are you feeling okay? Because I didn’t adopt any humans.”

“Right, yeah, that just proves it,” Ginger said. “You’re not him. You’re some kind of...of fucking...like clone or something. Or maybe you’re another alternate Doctor. We’ve run into so many of me, there have to be tons of you out there!”

“Wait, slow down, what are you talking about?”

“You can’t fool me with these...these cheap tricks. Nice try! Like an evil twin was gonna fool me! You don’t remember Alex? Well we’ll just have to figure out what happened, won’t we?”

“How do we do that?” he asked, patiently.

“We’ve gotta find Captain Jack. Or Sarah Jane. They’ll know what happened. They’ll fix it.”

“Wait, how do you know Jack and Sarah Jane?” the Doctor asked. “Have we talked about them?”

“No!” she shouted. “We’ve met them, remember? You, me, Alex, Jack, and Sarah Jane! The old crew!”

“Ginger, we’ve never once spent time with Sarah Jane and Jack.”

“Oh that’s fun. Getting the doppelganger to gaslight me. Very clever.”

“I’m not gaslighting you,” the Doctor said, seeming so sincere that it gave her pause. “I’m just trying to figure out what’s happening here and why you’re so upset.”

“Take me to see Jack,” she demanded. “He’ll back me up, he always does.”

“I don’t even know where to find him-”

“Yes you do!” she insisted. “He's got a flat in Soho!”

“What’s he doing there?”

She groaned. “Ugh, you’re being impossible! Just take me there!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting real Life on Mars in here, I guess lol.


	8. Aneurysm

Ginger hammered on the door to Jack's apartment. “Jack, open up! It’s us!” She knocked again. 

"Maybe he's not home," the Doctor said.

Ginger knew that he was trying to be tactful, but really meant 'maybe we've got the wrong place'. This infuriated her. She kept pounding on the door.

“Jack, come on-”

The door opened, but it wasn’t Jack. “Of course he has a guest,” she rolled her eyes. “What’s your name, mate? Actually we don’t have time.” She pushed her way past the stranger. “Jack, make yourself decent, please, we’re coming in!”

“Hey you can’t just walk up in here-” the guy protested.

“Sure we can, we’ve got an open invitation,” she said to the guy. “Jack, come on out, this is important.”

“Don’t know anyone named Jack,” the guy insisted. “This is my flat.”

“What? What do you mean you don't know anyone named Jack?” Ginger asked. “He’s been here for years.”

“No, you’ve got the wrong address,” he said. “Now I’m going to have to suggest you leave-”

But Ginger didn’t have the patience for this and pushed the guy against the wall, holding a threatening arm against his throat to pin him there.

“Ginger, what’re you-” the Doctor began, alarmed.

“We haven’t go the wrong address,” she said in a low, dangerous voice. “I’ve been here dozens of times. Now what’ve you done with Jack? I know you can’t kill him but if you’ve hurt him-”

“Lady, get off me,” the stranger said in a strangled voice, his face turning blue. “I dunno what you’re talking about…”

“Ginger, get off him,” the Doctor said. “Ginger, come on, you’re hurting him.”

And she realized she was, so she begrudgingly let him go. “Sorry. I get carried away.”

“You’re out of your mind, lady,” the stranger said, massaging his throat. “I want you out of my flat! Now!”

…

“Well now what?” the Doctor asked, once they were back on the street. “That was, as you’d say, a total bust.”

“Sarah Jane!” she said, as she latched onto the idea. “We’ve got to go see Sarah Jane! Jack might not be around, but Sarah Jane is always in the same place!  We have to find Alex. Whatever’s happened to Jack will all make sense when we find Alex. So we go to Sarah Jane’s.”

…

“Hello Sarah Jane,” the Doctor smiled, as she opened the door.

“Doctor! To what do I owe this unexpected visit?”

“We’ve got some questions,” Ginger cut in. “If you wouldn’t mind.”

“Who’s this?” Sarah Jane asked. “New companion?”

“What?” Ginger asked. “Not a  _ new  _ companion, Sarah Jane! You know me!”

“I’m sorry, I don’t recall,” Sarah Jane said, puzzled but polite. “Have we met?”

Ginger was dumbfounded. “Yes of course we have!”

“Can we come in?” the Doctor asked. “See if we can get this sorted?”

“Alright,” Sarah Jane said. “I’ll put some tea on.”

“Well where’s Alex?” Ginger asked as they walked into the house. 

“Hm?” Sarah Jane said quizzically. “Who?”

“Come off it,” she said. “Alex. Alex Mitchell. Your daughter.”

“I haven’t got a daughter, just a son. Think you might have me confused with someone else.”

“No that’s impossible!” Ginger was really shocked now. “You do have a daughter! You adopted Alex years ago! And...and that’s not even mentioning Sky!”

“Sky?”

“Yes, your other daughter.”

“That’s a pretty name,” Sarah Jane replied. "But I really don't have a daughter."

…

“I don’t get it,” Ginger said, as Sarah Jane put a cup of tea in front of her. “You  _ know  _ me. Maybe not as well as the others...But we just spent months searching for the Doctor when he disappeared. You were the only person who didn’t think I was losing it. You believed me that he was still alive.”

“I’m sorry, dear, but that didn’t happen,” Sarah Jane replied, kindly. 

“How can neither of you know Alex?”

“Who  _ is  _ Alex?” the Doctor asked. “You keep bringing up the name like it’s supposed to mean something to us.”

“Of course it is!” she replied, indignantly. “You and Sarah Jane adopted her.”

“The two of us did?” the Doctor asked, exchanging a puzzled look with Sarah Jane.

“Yeah,” she insisted. “She was the daughter of two dead Torchwood agents - Jack Harkness was her godfather-”

“Wait slow down,” the Doctor said. “How do you know about Torchwood?”

“I mean it’s not exactly like it’s a well-kept secret, is it?” she said, frustrated.

“Alright, alright,” the Doctor said, peaceably. “How can we help?”

“We’ve got to find Alex and Jack,” she insisted. “We’ll start with Jack - he can always find her.”

“How will we do that?”

She thought about it. “Mr Smith.”

“I’m sorry?” Sarah Jane replied.

“Mr Smith,” Ginger insisted. “Your computer. When Doc went missing, we had him scouring everywhere for him. And you told me about some...some sub-wave network, I think you called it? You could do something like that. Track down Captain Jack for me. Please. I just need to talk to Jack and this will all make sense."

...

Sarah Jane indulged Ginger by letting her use Mr Smith to track down Jack through the Sub-Wave Network.

"You remember me," Ginger said to the computer. "Don't you? You've got to remember me."

"I'm sorry," Mr Smith replied. "I have no record of us ever meeting."

She was disappointed but growing less surprised. "I thought so. You know, at one time, it would've been a relief that a super computer would have no record of me."

Sarah Jane and the Doctor were huddled by the door watching this exchange.

"Is she alright?" Sarah Jane asked.

The Doctor didn't take his eyes off of Ginger. "I hope so," he replied. "She gets these nightmares sometimes. They're always terrible, but I can usually get her calmed down. I've never seen her this mixed up."

The Sub-Wave Network found its target and Jack Harkness answered with his trademark thousand watt smile.

"Hello, Sub-Wave Network!" he said. "I knew there was a reason I kept this thing open! So who's out there looking for me? Martha Jones? The Doctor?"

Ginger's spirits soared when she saw him. "The Doctor's here," she said. "But I'm the one looking for you."

Jack focused on her. "And what can I do for you, beautiful?"

Ginger didn't understand his tone. This wasn't how he talked to her. "I was looking for you. Things have gone all wrong and you're the only person I trust. I keep saying I'm trying to find Alex, but I just really need to talk to you-"

"Alex?" he asked. "Alex who?"

She felt her heart begin sinking gradually. "You know...Alex."

"If you mean Alex Hopkins, he died over 20 years ago."

"No," she insisted. "Not him. I mean Alex Mitchell. Your goddaughter."

He tried not to show his shock, but Ginger knew him well enough to see that he was shaken. "How do you know that name?"

This was a relief. At least _someone_ was acting like Alex existed! "She used to travel with us."

"You said the Doctor's there? Put him on."

The Doctor exchanged a look with Sarah Jane before stepping into sight. "Jack," he said simply, by way of greeting.

"What's this about you traveling with Alex?" he demanded. 

"I don't know anything about this," he said apologetically. "Ginger woke up today with this idea in her head that I had an adopted daughter named Alex and she had something to do with you."

"She's Jack's goddaughter!" Ginger insisted. "She was a foster kid after her parents died, but Sarah Jane and Doc adopted her-"

"None of that happened," the Doctor said gently.

"For one thing, Alex Mitchell's parents are still alive," Jack interjected.

This was the biggest bombshell yet. "What? No, that's not right. They were killed at Torchwood 3-"

He shook his head. "No. I told them to get out as soon as Jodie got pregnant. We wiped their memories and sent them to England to raise her. I've been keeping tabs on them. Alex Mitchell is just a normal girl, raised away from all this. Now tell me who you are and how you know about her."

This was almost too much and she felt tears spring to her eyes. "You don't remember me?"

"Should I?"

"I'm Ginger. We're friends."

"I don't remember ever meeting you."

This stung, she had to admit that. Jack was the closest friend she had and he didn't even know her. "I'm not crazy," she insisted. "I'm not. I know that was real. It happened. You know me. You all know me."

Jack shook his head. "I'm sorry." He turned his attention back to the Doctor. "This is all very worrying. Nobody should know that Alex Mitchell has anything to do with us. I need to know how she knows. Maybe some form of memory implant? Whatever it is, it can't be good."

"I'm getting worried too," the Doctor admitted. "Maybe we should meet up. Are you still in Cardiff?"

Ginger latched eagerly onto the word. "Cardiff! Yeah, I wanna go to Cardiff." She was feeling drained and she knew that she'd feel better with a little Rift Energy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This note originally said I was gonna take another hiatus, but you know what? Fuck that. I'll see you guys again next week lol.
> 
> I'm nearly caught up with Doctor Who now. It's kinda wild. Jack is back and everything! Everyone knows Jack is my favorite so that helps lol.


	9. Olly Olly Oxen Free

"You look a little annoyed," the Doctor said. "More than usual, I mean."

Ginger crossed her arms. "Cardiff usually makes me feel better than this. I mean I feel better, but not like better better. Maybe it's just all the stuff going on with me, who knows..."

"You've been to Cardiff before?"

She stopped walking. "Yeah, of course I have! You were there with me!"

"We've never been to Cardiff, Ginger."

"Yes we have!" she said, voice rising desperately. "We have, I know we have! Stop telling me we haven't done things I know we've done!"

The Doctor could see that she was upset and couldn't blame her. "I'm thinking Jack's right, that something's going on here. I'm going to help you, I promise."

She scoffed. "Get me help, you mean."

"No, I mean help. Any way I can."

"The Doctor will figure this out, dear," Sarah Jane said. "He always does."

Ginger had forgotten she was there. "Why are you even here? You could've stayed behind in Ealing."

"I had nothing else going on," she said. "Besides, if we really did know each other, I don't want to be the last to find out."

...

Jack met them outside his makeshift base.

"Doctor!" he said. "And Sarah Jane! Good to see you both!"

"Always a pleasure, Captain," Sarah Jane said.

"The pleasure's all mine," he winked. Then he focused on Ginger. "And there's the woman of the hour! Come inside, we'll get this figured out."

...

Ginger looked around at his various equipment while Jack consulted with Sarah Jane and the Doctor.

"When did all of this start happening?" Jack asked.

"When Ginger woke up this morning," the Doctor said. "She was acting strange, but that's just how she is. She gets in these moods sometimes, especially after a bad nightmare. But she bounces back quicker than this."

"And she mentioned Alex?" Jack pressed.

"Yeah, she said something about Alex then said she had to talk to you immediately. We went to find you at a place she swore was your flat in Soho, but you weren't there. So we went to find Sarah Jane."

"I can hear you guys, you know," Ginger said irritably. "It's these ears. They're smarter than the rest of me."

"The rest of you isn't exactly stupid, you know," the Doctor pointed out.

She didn't smile. "Let's get this over with."

"I'd like to run some tests," Jack said.

"I ran some scans in the TARDIS on the way over," the Doctor said.

Ginger bristled. "When did you-"

"They didn't look abnormal."

She squinted at him. "What do you mean they didn't look abnormal?"

"For any other Gallifreyan, I mean."

Jack laughed. "Wait, hold on. You didn't tell me Ginger's _Gallifreyan_!"

"He shouldn't have to," Ginger said. "You already know that. You were at my coming out party."

He raised his eyebrows. "Coming out party? We might be friends after all."

Ginger sighed with frustration. "Let's do this, okay?"

"Buy a guy a drink first," he teased.

"Don't talk to me like that," she warned. "See, something's wrong with all of you. Doc and Sarah Jane don't remember things they ought to. And you're talking to me like - like that. This is all wrong. It's all wrong."

"When did you start calling me Doc?" the Doctor asked.

This threw her off balance. "What?"

"You keep calling me Doc today. You've never done that before."

"Yeah I have! Loads of times!"

The Doctor looked at Jack pleadingly. "Please, just run some tests. I don't know what you could find that I couldn't, but I need a second opinion."

"Maybe your machines won't be faulty," Ginger grumbled. "Since the TARDIS obviously needs retuning. My scans shouldn't be normal. You know that. Or at least you should."

"We can try a lie detector test," Jack offered.

"Like a polygraph?" Ginger scoffed. "Those things are so easy to trick. They're not admissible evidence. A couple months ago you and I bought a polygraph and played games with it, remember? We called it the Con Game? Because we're both trained con artists so who better to prove you could trick a polygraph with ease?"

"How do you know I used to be a con artist?" he asked.

She groaned. "Because you _told_ me! We're friends! We're both liars whose pseudonyms are more real to us than our given names! We made a pact never to ask each other what our given names were, because our chosen names mean more to us! I made a similar pact with the Doctor!"

"I don't remember any of that, I'm sorry." He walked over to a shelf and picked up a headset. "This is a brainwave reader. I hate to do this, but I need to know if you're telling the truth."

"Another bloody polygraph." She sighed heavily. "Just do it."

"It's not just for telling me if you're telling the truth," he said as he put it on her head. "It'll also tell me if there's anything wrong with your memory. Gaps, warps, or things that shouldn't be there."

"Do your worst," she said.

He finished up and stepped in front of her. "What's your name?"

"Ginger Olivia Roswell," she said.

The reader lit up green.

"She's telling the truth," Jack said. "Where did you first meet the Doctor?"

"At the Bacchus Theatre in Camden," she said. "I was the tech and he was hunting aliens."

"Also true," he said. "Where did you learn about Alex Mitchell?"

"The Doctor brought her to see one of my plays when she was 17. I started training her to be a tech."

It glowed green.

"I don't understand," Jack said. "It says you're telling the truth."

"But it could be tampered with, couldn't it?" the Doctor asked. "Because that never happened."

"No," Jack said. "Added memories come up orange. That lit up green."

"Test him then," Ginger said. "Test all of you, actually. Then you'll see someone's been messing with you!"

...

"I don't understand," Jack said, some time later. "How can we all be telling the truth?

"Your machine's faulty," Ginger fumed. "It doesn't make sense. We can't all have perfect memories if I remember something completely different! I don't understand. I don't get what kind of sick test this is. Like it would almost make more sense if it was a memory implant and you were trying to convince me I was Fauxlivia..." Her expression cleared.

"Ginger?" the Doctor said. "What is it?"

"Fauxlivia," Ginger said. "This is all starting to make sense. It still makes no sense because I don't know how this happened or who's doing it, but..."

"But what?"

"What if this is a Fringe thing? What if I've got myself trapped in some other universe and they're trying to convince me I'm someone I'm not to keep me busy while some other Ginger lives my life?"

He was alarmed by this idea. "Ginger, I don't think-"

"You should," Ginger said. "Because I knew you weren't my Doctor. My Doctor is dead. But if I'm not your Ginger, then you should really be asking yourself where the hell your Ginger is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you think? Do you think Ginger's theory is correct? Has she somehow been swapped with another Ginger? Or is something else going on? All that and more when I return from hiatus! 
> 
> Yeah, I mean it this time. I'm going on hiatus next week. But I'll be back with 3 new chapters the week after!
> 
> Thanks to everyone who donated on my Tumblr to help me get my medication! I reached my goal yesterday! I really appreciate it.


	10. Ghosts

"That's certainly an explanation," the Doctor said.

"Don't try to handle me," Ginger said dismissively. "I won't be handled or placated."

"I'm not trying to handle you," the Doctor said. He glanced at the others before leaning towards her slightly and whispering: "At least not in front of people."

Jack and Sarah Jane exchanged a look. He hadn't been nearly as quiet and subtle as he was trying to be, but then again neither of those were attributes that mattered when he was trying to make Ginger smile.

"Don't do that," Ginger snapped. The tactic hadn't worked.

"I'm sorry," he said. 

"Don't just say you're sorry to keep me managed," she said. "You think this is crazy, you just don't want to say it."

"I really am sorry," he said. "It's just a lot to take in. I'm not trying to manage you, honestly. It's a good theory and if it's true, then I want to help you figure that out. I'd do anything to help you, you know that."

"So how do we go about proving it?" Jack asked. "When Torchwood was still here, I might've been able to do something. But all the equipment I have is in this warehouse, and it's not going to be able to prove anything on this scale."

"And who or what is responsible?" the Doctor added. "You mentioned Fringe. We need to find the Walternate who's trying to keep you trapped and find out the reason why."

"And beyond that," Sarah Jane agreed. "How do we get you home once we've proved it?"

Ginger was so relieved, but couldn't help but feel suspicious all the same. "You'd really do that? You'd really help me?"

"Why wouldn't we?" the Doctor asked.

"Helping people is what we do," Sarah Jane added.

"But you don't even know me," Ginger said to Sarah Jane and Jack. "I could be some mad woman."

"Mad women still need help sometimes," Jack said.

"I'd never turn my back on anyone in need," said Sarah Jane.

"Let's go to the TARDIS," the Doctor said. "I have equipment there that might help us."

...

Sarah Jane and Jack entered the TARDIS first, but the Doctor closed the door before he and Ginger could enter. 

She crossed her arms and braced for the attack. "What?" she demanded.

He was visibly apologetic - embarrassed, even - but he also didn't know how else to ask this sensitively. "I need to make sure," he said. "Before we go any further. I'm not saying this because I don't believe you-"

She rolled her eyes. "Great start."

"I know how hard it is to argue with you when you have an idea in your head," he said. "Again, I'm not saying that I don't believe you. I just need to ask you one thing before we do this and if you tell me it isn't about that, then I won't bring it up again. You'll have my full support and I will follow this through without hesitation."

She was impatient, but knew that she'd need his help to figure out what happened. "What is it?"

"I need to make sure this isn't, you know, about what happened."

This statement was far too vague to make any kind of sense to her. "What do you mean?"

He ruffled his hair and avoided her gaze. "I know you were very enthusiastic at the time, but if you're having second thoughts, you can just tell me. You don't have to go through all this. I was worried that it would push you too far and if there's any chance that you're uncomfortable with me now, you can tell me. I'm not going to be upset."

She squinted at him. "What're you...?"

"I don't need anything from you," he said. "I'm fine with us going back to just being friends. Roswell was unforgettable, but-" 

The implication hit her like a ton of bricks and she hoped her cheeks hadn't given her away by going as red as her hair. " _Oh._ You mean..."

"I understand if you regret Roswell now," he said. "If you feel like maybe you were rushed into it. You don't have to feel bad about it. We don't have to speak about it ever again if you don't want to."

Tears were rising to her eyes as she felt the crushing weight of those words wrap around her heart. "Doctor," she said softly as she struggled to keep her voice from shaking. "Where in the timeline are you? Because it sounds like you're trying to tell me that Roswell just happened."

"It's been a few days, but yeah," he admitted. "That's where we are."

She pressed shaking fingers to her lips as she turned away from him so he wouldn't be able to see if she started to cry. 

"Ginger?" he said tentatively. "What is it? Did I say something wrong?"

She took a fraction of a second to find her voice before shaking her head and faking a smile. "No," she breathed. She turned back to face him. "No, you could never. You're just so young." She laughed to herself.

Now he was lost. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing," she said. "I just thought what my Doctor would say if he heard me calling you young. I'm only a few months ahead in the timeline, if it all adds up the way I think it does. And yet I think I know so much more than you. Even a few months younger Doctor is still much older than me." 

"So this isn't about Roswell?" he asked. "Not about what's been going on with us?"

She shook her head. "No. No of course not. Don't think that even for a second. Roswell was the best night of my life. I'll never regret it for as long as I live."

He was visibly relieved. "As long as you're sure."

She nodded. "I am." 

He didn't say anything for what felt like the longest moment. "I believe you. And I'll help you any way I can."

She'd expected more of a fight somehow. "Really?"

"I don't want this to be true," he said. "But if you say that you're from another universe, I'm going to investigate it. I owe you that much. I have no reason at all to doubt you, so I believe you. And I'll find a way to get you home, I promise."

She was so relieved that she hugged him purely out of instinct. His arms wrapped around her, enclosing her in a feeling of safety she hadn't experienced in months. She tried not to cry when she heard the familiar beating of his two hearts.

"Thank you," she said.

"You must really want to get home," he said, stroking her hair.

That choice of words stung slightly as it reminded her that this wasn't where she belonged. She started to pull away, but her body moved out of habit to try to kiss him. She caught herself half a second after the impulse struck, but she knew he knew she'd been about to kiss him. To his credit, he didn't say anything about it. He just looked at her. But that made it harder somehow. Because when he looked at her at her the way her Doctor always used to look at her, she felt unable to look away. And looking always led to other things. She felt his breath on her face and wanted to kiss him so badly. It had been far too long and she missed him so terribly. It felt impossible that she could be here, this close to him, and _not_ kiss him. She was dizzy and confused. She needed to keep a grip on reality.

"You've got to let me go," she said. "I'll not have this turn into Marionette. If your Doppelginger gets back and finds out you've been snogging the impostor, she'll be so upset."

He smiled. "Who said anything about snogging?"

"You did," she whispered. "With your eyes..." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she pressed her forehead against his. "No." She reluctantly pulled away from him and shook her head. "It's not right. A part of me _really_ doesn't care that it's not right, but it's not. Because if I'm here, that means your Ginger is out there somewhere. If she's lucky, she's just in my universe somewhere having to deal with my issues. Maybe she could learn a thing or two, I dunno. But I'm not entirely convinced whoever is doing this hasn't got her locked up somewhere. This is hard for me - believe me, it's not natural for Gingers to care about each other. But I care about you. You might not be my Doctor, but I won't trick you while your Ginger is still out there somewhere. That wouldn't be fair."

"You're right," he said. "I wasn't thinking."

"It's not your fault," she said. "In fact, that's probably the point. We don't think very clearly when we're around each other." She opened the TARDIS door. "So let's go."

She strode into the TARDIS and it was like a punch in the heart. She hadn't noticed it the first time because she'd been in such a hurry, but it was exactly the way she remembered it. She wanted so badly to stay, but she knew that wasn't right.

"So how do we go around proving that Ginger is from another universe?" Sarah Jane asked.

"Oh!" Ginger said. "I know!" She turned to the Doctor. "The 3D glasses!"

He was surprised. "How do you know about those?" he asked.

"You showed me once, in my universe," Ginger said. "You used them to show me the 'void stuff' that was around our alternates. So you should be able to see some around me."

"If I didn't already believe you, I think I might take that as proof," the Doctor said. 

"Don't worry about it," Ginger said. "If Roswell just happened for you, then you haven't had to use them yet."

The Doctor took his 3D glasses out of his pocket and peered at her.

She placed a hand on her hips. "Well?" she demanded. "What do you see?" She swayed slightly. "Do you need a better angle?"

"Not from where I'm standing," Jack said.

"Stop _saying_ things like that!" Ginger snapped. "You're really freaking me out!"

"I don't see anything," the Doctor said. 

"What?" Ginger said.

"I mean I don't see anything," he repeated. "No trace of void stuff whatsoever."

She shook her head. "That can't be right. Let me see those."

He pulled back before she could take them. "And what do you expect to see with them? You can't exactly look at yourself."

"Good point," she said sullenly. "But that's still wrong. I _have_ to be from another universe. I know things I shouldn't know and have real memories that shouldn't exist."

"Maybe you didn't come through recently," the Doctor said. "Void stuff is a sort of background radiation from coming through the void. Maybe you've been here a while and the radiation faded."

"How long would I have to be here before the radiation would fade completely?" she asked.

He ran a hand through his hair and cast his eyes to the ceiling as he did the appropriate mental calculations. "Not sure," he admitted. "I think it would take approximately half a million years before it would thoroughly degrade?"

Her eyebrows shot right up. " _Half a million years?"_ she scoffed. "There's no way I've been here _half a million years_! I'd know it!"

"Even if you've been unconscious the whole time?" he asked. "I know you've got this uncanny sense of your own personal timeline, but you've been removed from it. If you've been held in some sort of stasis, then it stands to reason you'd be a little spatially disoriented."

"But what could have the power to do that?" she demanded. "To have me in stasis for half a million years _and_ get me to a whole other universe _and_ switch me with another Ginger without me knowing?" Then it dawned on her. "Do you think it was the Trickster?"

"You know about the Trickster?" Sarah Jane asked.

"You had a run-in with him in your universe?" the Doctor asked. 

"Yeah," Ginger laughed. "Of course I did! He was behind the whole thing!"

"What whole thing?" he asked.

"You know!" Ginger insisted. "He was the one who..." The words died in her throat.

"The one who what?" the Doctor pressed.

She suddenly realized that this Doctor likely didn't know who his Ginger really was. She could try to tell him, but she thought about what she would feel like if a Ginger had taken that story away from her before she had a chance to explain. That would feel terrible. And completely unfair. This was her truth, but right now it wasn't her truth to tell.

"Nothing," she said. "It doesn't matter. But could it be him?"

"It's as good an idea as any," Sarah Jane said. "He's always playing with dimensions to suit his needs. Can you walk us through the last things you remember before you woke up here today? Tell us everything you can remember."

Ginger cast her mind back as far as she could, but had trouble conjuring memory. "I don't know..." She put a hand to her face.

"Are you alright, dear?" Sarah Jane asked, interpreting the gesture as a sign of pain.

"Yeah," she said. "It's just...Whenever I try to think about it, I start seeing these lights."

"Lights?" Jack asked. "What kind of lights? Like a glow from a lab?"

"Or a ship?" the Doctor pressed.

She shook her head. "No, it's not like that," she said. "It's like...one of those J.J. Abrams lens flare motherfuckers."

"I'm sorry?" Sarah Jane asked, perplexed by the phrasing.

"Interesting," said the Doctor, who had immediately understood the reference. "I wonder what that could mean."

"I saw it when I first woke up too," she said. 

"Kind of like when Olivia would first arrive in another universe?" he asked.

She hadn't thought about it like that. "Yeah, I guess so?"

"Have you had any other symptoms?" he asked. "Headaches, time lapses?"

She thought about it. "No headaches, surprisingly. I usually get a migraine for just about anything. And I hadn't noticed it before, but maybe some time lapses? Not the way Olivia had them where everything was out of sync, but things just sort of skip to where the story would go next? Yeah, that's what it's like. I don't know why I didn't realize it before. Do you remember flying the TARDIS today?"

"Yeah," he said. "Of course I do."

"I don't remember you doing that," she said. "I told you I wanted to see Jack, and next thing I knew we were in Soho. I didn't think about it because it seemed perfectly logical at the time."

"You just cut to the scene," he said. "That _is_ interesting."

"I don't think I understand," Sarah Jane said. "Who's Olivia?"

"It's from a television show," the Doctor said. "One of Ginger's favorites."

"Sorry, Sarah Jane," Ginger said. "You'll have to get used to the references. I'm autistic so they're the only way I know how to make sense of things."

"So what do we do first?" Jack asked.

"First we look for a soft spot in the universe," the Doctor said. "If you came through somehow, there's going to be at least a Ginger-shaped hole."

"How long will that take?" Ginger asked.

He shrugged apologetically. "It's a big universe. A scan of this magnitude would have to survey every atom of it trying to find the tear."

"So what?" she pressed. "Another half-million years?"

"It'll take as long as it takes," he said. "We can't rush it."

"So what do we do in the meantime?" she asked. "Just wait?"

"I know how much you hate waiting," he said gently. "But we'll get this figured out, I promise."

She wanted to argue, but she could see in his eyes that he expected her to so that took all the fun out of it. "Fine. Just make it snappy." 

The Doctor got started running the scan. Ginger paced restlessly over to the railing while Sarah Jane and Jack tried to keep out of the way.

"Maybe we should go," Sarah Jane said softly to Jack. 

"Why?" Jack asked. "This is just getting interesting."

"We might be a crowd," Sarah Jane pointed out. "I don't want to get in the way."

Ginger overheard this. "What? No! You can't go!" She was worried that she was attracting too much attention so glanced at the Doctor, but he was engrossed in his calculations and hadn't noticed. She took Jack and Sarah Jane aside.

"You can't go," Ginger repeated softly. "Please. First of all, the Sarah Jane Smith from my universe would know that she's never in the way and is invaluable to our investigations."

"And secondly?" Jack asked.

She hesitated, clearly embarrassed that she had to say this. "You can't leave me alone with him," she pleaded, the barest note of anxiety entering her voice.

"Who?" Sarah Jane asked. "The Doctor?"

She nodded.

"Why?" Jack pressed. "Is there something wrong with him? Is there something we should be worried about?"

"No, it's not about him," she insisted. "I just can't trust myself to be alone with him. I fall back on bad habits."

"Bad habits?" Sarah Jane repeated.

"He's not my Doctor," she said. "My Doctor is dead. But if there's still a Ginger out there somewhere, I can't take hers away from her. As much as I might want to." She glanced at him, then back away quickly. 

"Oh," Sarah Jane said as she understood. "You and him?"

Ginger nodded. "In another timeline. And from what I've experienced today, I'm going to say things aren't much different here."

"What do you mean what you've experienced today?" Jack asked.

"Is it important?" Ginger asked, uncomfortably.

"It might be," he pressed.

She deliberated for a moment before giving in. She wanted so badly to talk this through with a Jack, and this one would have to do in a pinch. "I woke up next to him today."

"Next to him?"

"Don't be deliberately slow," she said. "You know what I mean. In bed."

A slow grin was taking over his face. "No clothes on?"

She sighed. "Not a stitch." She held up a finger to warn him. "Not a _word_."

He laughed. "I'm sorry, it's just impressive. People don't normally get that far. Believe me-"

"You've tried," she finished dryly. "I know, you've told me that before." She noticed that Sarah Jane was being quiet. "Are you alright?"

Sarah Jane smiled pleasantly. "I'm fine, dear. It's just a bit much to take in. But we have more pressing concerns. You woke up in bed, unclothed. You were somehow moved to that bed and your doppelganger was removed, all without the Doctor waking up."

"That's a good point," Ginger said. 

"Maybe we should run a tox screen," Jack said. "See if anything's floating around in your systems that could account for that."

She slapped a hand to her forehead. "Of course! I can't believe that wasn't my first thought!" She started to turn to go back to the Doctor, but thought better of it. "But you'll both stay? Please?"

"Whatever you need," Sarah Jane replied. 

"Right now I need to investigate your idea," Ginger said. "Because that was a good one."

"It might be best if you take credit for it, dear," Sarah Jane said. "Just so he doesn't ask why I know you two woke up together."

"Thank you," she said. "I would appreciate the ability to preserve my dignity." She steeled herself and returned to the controls. "Hey Doc, wanna do some tox screens?"

"Why?" he asked. He was surprised by the request but was too engrossed in his readings to look up.

She glanced over her shoulder for dramatic effect. She needed the Doctor to believe that she was trying to keep a secret from Jack and Sarah Jane. "I woke up in your bed," she whispered.

"Is that unusual where you come from?" he said, the edges of his mouth curving into a smile.

She resisted the urge to smile back. There was something so endearingly familiar about this banter. "It didn't used to be," she admitted. "But I'm assuming that you went to bed with your Ginger last night?"

"You're assuming it was night," he said. "Time travel is funny like that."

"My point is that you went to bed next to a Ginger and didn't notice that someone switched her in the night," she pointed out. "Does that seem like you?"

He finally looked at her. "That's a point," he said as the implications sank in. "More than that, it's a _good_ point." He reached for her and she knew it was to hold her face in his hands and plant a kiss on her forehead, so she stepped away. His arms fell awkwardly to his sides as he realized what his instincts had made him do. He carried on as if nothing had happened. "You think we might have been drugged?"

"There's a pretty good possibility," she said. "We would've had to be heavily tranquilized to make that happen."

He rushed to the other side of the console at once and flipped open a panel. He returned to her a moment later. "Open your mouth."

She blinked. "What?"

He held out what seemed like a fancy thermometer. "Quick contaminate tests. If there's anything in your blood that shouldn't be, this will tell us."

"Well give it to me then," she snapped irritably. She snatched the test from him and turned away to use it. She didn't want him to know the things that had gone through her mind and was afraid he might be able to read them on her face. She put the test into her mouth and waited what seemed like an eternity before it lit up red. She took it from her mouth and turned back to him.

"Red," she said. "So that's bad, right?"

She could now see that his was red as well. "Actually, that means it's negative. You're clean. There's nothing in your system that shouldn't be there."

"That's impossible!" she said. "That doesn't make sense!"

"You're right," he said. "It doesn't. There should still be trace amounts of something in our system-"

"I'm starting to think maybe I was wrong about you!" she interrupted furiously. "You insist that I have _no_ void stuff and _no_ contaminates! Maybe it's not faulty equipment, maybe it's you! I mean you're _way_ too calm about all this! What is it? You trying to keep me here? Is this _your_ sick plan?"

"Ginger, I'm trying to help you," he said patiently. "I'm doing all I can-"

"You're not doing anything!" she said. "You're being useless! I keep telling you that I'm not your Ginger! I'm not going to be! You can't just _kidnap_ me!"

"I'm not trying to kidnap you-"

"What's your deal? Did you strike out with your Ginger? Is that why you're so calm about this? Things didn't turn out the way you wanted, so you decided just to switch us out? We're not interchangeable, you know!"

"No you're not," he said, a trace of anger finally beginning to show behind his eyes. "You're irreplaceable."

"So then why aren't you trying to find her?" she demanded. "If you cared about her at all-"

"If I cared about her, then what?" he asked, finally allowing himself to get angry. "Go ahead, finish that thought. Tell me what I should do differently. Should I fall apart completely? Should I abandon all reason and be useless? Should I abandon you? You might not be my Ginger, but you're _a_ Ginger. I can't leave you on your own to figure things out. You need my help. And I need yours. Right now, I've accepted that the best way to find answers is to find your answers. If we find out how you got here, we find out where my Ginger is. I can't prioritize one over the other, because they're the same problem. But by all means, keep wasting time by accusing me of being in on the plot to kidnap someone I care about. I'm sure that will help a lot."

She knew that he was sincere, and even felt a little bad. But she refused to back off completely. "Fine," she said. "Whatever. I just need to do something. There has to be someone around who we can interrogate."

"Who do you suggest we ask?" he asked.

The idea hit her so suddenly that she almost kicked herself for not thinking of it sooner. "Cupid!" she said. "Cupid will have some idea!"

"I'm sorry, did you just say Cupid?" Jack asked. "Little flying baby with a bow and arrow?"

"He's not like that at all," Ginger said. "Please tell me you've met Cupid in this timeline, Doc, and have some idea of how to find him."

"I don't know how to find him," the Doctor said. "But I know who you're talking about. So we trust Cupid now?"

"Completely," she said. "He might not tell us everything he knows, but he'll help us any way he can."

The Doctor had so many questions. "Alright," he said. "it's a big universe, so let's get started."

...

And like that, they were walking on a forest path. Ginger realized they were all wearing a particular type of old-fashioned tunic.

"Stupid question," she said. "Are we in Greece?"

"Did you time-skip again?" the Doctor asked, with just the faintest note of concern in his voice.

"I did," she admitted. "You said it's a big universe, then it cut to here."

"We've been tracking down Cupid," Sarah Jane said. "You really don't remember?"

She shook her head.

They emerged into a small clearing filled with people who seemed to be having some sort of celebration.

"We have it on good intel that Cupid should be here," Jack said. "You'll have to let us know if you see him."

"We should ask around," the Doctor said. "Get a feel of the place."

"Good idea," Jack said.

"Whatever," said Ginger. She was just grateful for the opportunity to split up.

But it seemed Sarah Jane and Jack had other ideas.

"You're being a bit harsh on him, don't you think?" Sarah Jane asked. It wasn't an unkind statement, there was no judgement in it, but it was stern.

Ginger crossed her arms. "I don't know what you mean."

"He's trying to help you and he's obviously very worried," Sarah Jane said. "But you keep pushing him. I know it's hard for you to be around him, but all this punishment you're heaping on him is uncalled for."

"I'm not trying to punish him," she insisted.

"Then what?" Jack asked. 

"It's just a little hard," she admitted. "Seeing him like this."

"Like what?"

She watched the Doctor as he talked seriously with a priestess. "The same," she said.

"Right," Jack said. "You said yours died."

Ginger nodded.

"How did it happen?" Sarah Jane asked. "If you don't mind me asking."

"I'm not really sure," she admitted. "He hasn't told me yet."

"Yet?" Jack asked.

"There hasn't been a chance," she said. "He regenerated somehow, but I don't really know what happened. Just that he had to leave me to do it."

"He regenerated?" Sarah Jane repeated. "I thought you said he died."

"He did."

"But not permanently."

"No."

"And you're upset with him because he left you to do it?"

"It's a bit more complicated than that."

"Is it? Because it sounds to me like you're not just punishing this Doctor for not being who you want him to be, but you've been punishing your Doctor back home as well. It's selfish."

Suddenly she could see it in her head, a scrap of memory floated through her consciousness and seized all her attention.

_"The Doctor left me for decades, but that doesn't mean I hold it against him. He's still the same person at heart, and he never really stops caring for us. You can't keep punishing him because he's not who you want him to be. It's not fair to him. It's selfish. Because he's still that person. He just looks a bit different. You need to give yourselves time to get used to each other."_

"You said that to me before," Ginger said aloud as the memory faded. 

"What?" Sarah Jane said.

"You said that before," Ginger repeated. "When did you say that? You told me that I wasn't being fair to him and I was being selfish..." She closed her eyes and tried to conjure up the memory. "I can't remember."

"Is this from the other universe?" Jack asked. "Where you come from?"

"Yeah," she said. "I think so? It feels like trying to remember a dream."

"It sounds like pretty good advice," Sarah Jane said. "Maybe you should listen to it. Regeneration isn't the same thing as being dead. He might come back different, but at least he comes back."

"I know you're right," she said slowly.

"But?" Sarah Jane pressed.

"I don't know how I'll handle things when I get back, but I _can't_ be nicer to this Doctor."

"Why not?"

"It's too easy for me to fall right back in with him."

"And that's not fair to your doppelganger," Sarah Jane nodded. "You've said."

"It's not just that," she admitted. "That's a convenient excuse. You think I really care at all about my doppelganger? I'm a Ginger. We're not really known for self-care."

"Then what? Why push him away?"

"Because I'm not good for him. That's why I need you both to stay. I need you to keep us in line. There are things he doesn't know about that make this extremely complicated."

"What kind of things?" Jack asked. "What is it that you're not telling us?"

She was very tempted just to tell him. This was Jack, after all. But she couldn't bring herself to. "I can't, I'm sorry. It's my secret, but it's not mine to tell. Not here. That wouldn't be fair. I can't get in the middle of this. But trust me, I'm exactly the wrong person to be around the Doctor right now. That's probably why I'm here. Toss some volatile, grieving Ginger right back into the one place she misses the most and hope she wants it badly enough that she'll stay. Well guess what? It's working. So I need to push him away and I need you two to make sure I do. This entire universe could be at stake."

"Such words of wisdom," said a voice from behind her. "So you were listening to my lessons after all."

"Cupid!" She turned to greet him. "I've never been so glad to see you!"

"Always a pleasure to see you as well," Cupid smiled. He wasn't dressed in his usual pink suit, but had opted to switch it out for a white ancient Greek tunic.

"Cupid, we need your help," she said. "I'm trapped here somehow and it's getting confusing."

"Trapped where?" he asked. "In Greece?"

"No not in Greece, in this universe!" she insisted. "There's something funny going on here."

"Funny like what?"

"Like...like look at this." She waved to catch the Doctor's attention across the clearing. He saw and began making his way toward them. 

"Just look at this," she said to Cupid. "Doc, I found him!"

"Cupid," the Doctor said. "I'm surprised we were able to track you."

"I have my regular haunts," Cupid said. "Ginger said you were having some trouble?"

"You don't see it?" Ginger asked. "You don't see what's wrong here?"

"I'm afraid not," Cupid replied.

"Oh." Her stomach dropped. "Maybe it's too early in your timeline...or are you even the right Cupid? You said there used to be others."

"My dear, don't despair," Cupid said gently. "Walk me through it. We'll try to fix whatever's troubling you."

She blinked back tears. "The Doctor regenerated. I know he did, because I've spoken to him since. But I woke up here today and he's the same as he always was. And other little things are different too. Jack and Sarah Jane don't know me. Alex is apparently somewhere else entirely. I don't know how I got here, but it's not my universe."

"I believe you," Cupid said. "With the Doctor's permission, I'd like for us to go back to the TARDIS and see what we can do."

"Of course," the Doctor said. "Anything to get this sorted out as quickly as possible."

They trudged back along the forest path on their way back to the TARDIS. The night was cool and the trees blocked out most of the light from the moon. Ginger found her eyes drawn to the occasional movement along the footpath, but it always turned out to be an owl or a deer.

_Or a person._

She stopped in her tracks when she noticed the figure of the young woman in the sliver of moonlight. The dark haired women wore a high collared white dress and had her black haired tied back under a bonnet. 

"Don't leave me," she said. 

Cupid tugged gently on Ginger's sleeve with one gloved hand. She jumped and very nearly attacked before she realized who it was.

He smiled gently. "See something interesting, my dear?"

She started to gesture toward the lady in the moonbeam, but she was gone. "You didn't see her?"

"Who?"

She realized that she must sound mad. This whole thing sounded mad, if she was being honest with herself. "No one," she lied. "It's fine."

He looked at her with eyes that always knew more than they were saying before he spoke again. "Walk with me? We're lagging a bit behind, and I don't want the group to miss us."

She nodded. "Fine."

They walked in silence for a moment before he spoke again.

"You look like you've seen a ghost, my dear." He nodded toward the Doctor. "More than one tonight, to be exact."

She watched the Doctor as well as she answered. "You could say that."

"This must be so difficult for you. I can't imagine what temptation you must be feeling."

"It's the most wonderful, horrible thing I ever could have imagined," she admitted. 

"You always feel so much at once. It's a wonder you hold it all in. But I want you to listen to me, Ginger, because this is very important. I need you to tell me if anything strange is happening with you."

"Stranger than being somehow trapped in an alternate dimension?"

"I wouldn't say stranger than that, but more on the same level."

"Like time skips?"

"Are you experiencing time skips?"

She nodded.

"That in and of itself may not mean anything. But it's vital that you tell me if you experience anything else unusual. Especially if you start seeing things that you know aren't really there. You need to tell me immediately."

Then it happened again. A scrap of untethered memory floated across the sea of her consciousness.

_She was lying on her bed, hair matted and clinging to her face. Cupid brushed it away with a gloved hand._

_"It's alright to feel how you're feeling," he said. "It's perfectly natural. But I want you to listen to me, because this is very important. If you start seeing things that you know aren't real or experiencing things that don't make sense, I need you to tell me immediately. Don't worry about how it will sound, I just need you to tell me. It's vitally important. Do you understand?"_

"You said that before," Ginger said aloud, back in the present. "When did you say that?"

Cupid eyed her with interest. "Where did you go just then?"

"Down Memory Lane," she said. "I think. Cupid, I can't remember how I got here or what happened before. But I keep almost remembering. Like a dream. You told me to tell you if anything happened that didn't make sense. Well now I'm telling you. None of this makes sense. The Doctor regenerated. He redecorated his TARDIS. But I somehow ended up in his bed naked without either of us knowing? And his Ginger is missing so where the hell did they take her? And Doc says that I don't have any trace of void stuff on me, so I would've had to be here for half a million years. Which also doesn't make sense-"

"Because you always know what time it is," he said. "I know."

"But there's also no sign of anything in my system that would keep me asleep that long," Ginger said. "How am I here? And why?"

"I expect that you'll know when you're ready," he said. "And not before."

She sighed. "What does that mean?"

"It means some truths live inside of us, waiting to be known. If you're not able to understand it, you won't allow yourself to. You're too well defended."

"You told me to tell you if I'm seeing things," she said. "I just saw a woman in an old Victorian high collared dress. She looked like a ghost. But she wasn't real, was she?"

"Do you think she was?"

"I don't know," she admitted. "I'm confused. I feel like I've seen her somewhere before...if I could just think...I know it's there, if I could just remember."

He looked at her in silence for a moment. "I'm glad that you trusted me enough to tell me."

"But you think I'm crazy, don't you? I'm completely cracking up, right? That's why you asked me to tell you? Gingers are famously unstable, so maybe we go psychotic, who knows?"

"No," he said. "I don't have any evidence that you're losing your mind. And don't put down people with psychosis like that. They can be perfectly lovely people and usually aren't a danger to anyone." He reached into his pocket. "I want to give you this."

He placed a little pink heart-shaped pocket watch into her hands. She stared at it.

"Why?" she asked. "Sorry, that was rude, I just assume you have a reason?"

"You're having time skips and seeing things that aren't there," he said. "Whenever you have these experiences, I want you to look at the watch. Keep track of time."

"Okay," she said. That was at least something she could do about it. Having an action plan made it more manageable. She flipped it open and consulted it. Her brow furrowed. The display was flat and digital. There weren't any numbers on the screen at all.

 ** _Not the right time,_** it read.

She looked back at Cupid. "Is this some kind of joke?" she demanded.

"Why?" he asked. "What do you see?"

She pointed at the screen. "There aren't any numbers on this, it's just says-" Her words died in her throat as she looked down at what now appeared to be a perfectly normal pocket watch with numbers, hands, and little turning cogs.

"Yes?" Cupid pressed.

"Nothing," she said. "Trick of the light or something." She flipped it closed.

…

The Doctor unlocked the TARDIS and the others began filing inside. Ginger was about to when she heard a voice behind her.

"Please," it said. "I don't want to be alone. Don't leave me alone."

Ginger turned and spotted the same woman from before. 

_This isn't real,_ Ginger thought. _There's no way this is real._

She looked at her pocket watch.

 _ **Not now,** _it read.

 _Useless,_ she thought desperately. 

She looked up and to her dismay, the ghostly figure was still in front of her. "Who are you?" she demanded.

"Who are you?" the woman repeated.

"What do you..." she began. "Actually, scratch that, you've already said what you want, haven't you? You don't want to be alone. But why are you bothering me?"

"I can't find you," the woman said. "Where are you?"

"I'm in Greece," she said. "I think. Where are you?"

"I'm at home."

The Doctor poked his head out of the TARDIS. "Ginger? Are you coming?"

Ginger was startled but didn't break eye contact with the ghost. "Can you see her?" she asked.

"Who?"

"The woman," Ginger said.

"I don't see anyone, Ginger," the Doctor said.

"What's the hold up?" asked Jack as he, Sarah Jane, and Cupid came to see what the delay was.

"Ginger?" Cupid asked gently. "Is there something you'd like to tell us?"

"You see her, don't you?" Ginger asked. "She's right there!"

"I don't see anyone," said Cupid.

"I'm not crazy!" she insisted.

"I didn't say that you were," he assured her.

"This is why you gave me the watch, right? To keep track when I'm slipping? Well it's not working."

"Not exactly. And based on what I'm seeing, the watch wouldn't help with whatever you're experiencing. This is a different problem, one I'm not equipped to deal with."

"But you believe me?" she asked. "Doctor? I know it's insane, all of this is crazy!"

"There's no reason to believe that you're crazy," the Doctor said gently.

"That's just how you say it nicely when I'm seeing things that aren't real, right?"

"Not necessarily," the Doctor said. "Crazy is a word used by humans to describe anyone acting in a way that they don't understand. Crazy always has a reason. Sometimes it really is psychological, which isn't bad in and of itself when we can manage it, but just writing something off as crazy never helped anyone. There's always an explanation if you're willing to find it."

"Then find it," Ginger said. "Please."

The Doctor came to her side. "Is she still there?"

Ginger nodded without taking her eyes off the woman. "She's flickering a bit. And she's not moving."

"Alright," he said. "Show me where."

Ginger pointed directly in front of her and the Doctor took that opportunity to shine his sonic screwdriver in that direction. For an agonizing moment, he consulted the data and continued to trace it back along toward Ginger then back out again. Something about the sonic seemed to dissipate her when he got too close, so the ghost disappeared.

"She's gone," Ginger said.

"I know," the Doctor said as he consulted his sonic.

"You do?" she asked. That was a good sign! That meant he'd caught something!

"She's not totally gone," the Doctor explained. "There's still a trace left behind. There's always a trace left behind."

"What do you mean?"

"There's some sort of signal. I don't know where it's coming from but it's being beamed directly into your brain. I traced it to you. Someone or some thing is communicating with you directly. That's why none of the rest of us can see it."

"Why?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said. "Can you think of any reason why anyone would want to contact you?"

She shook her head. "You know Gingers. We're not especially sociable."

"What was she saying?" Jack asked. "If something is trying to contact you, then it stands to reason that there would be a message?"

Ginger thought about it. "She was asking where I went. And telling me not to leave. She didn't want to be alone."

"That could be a distress signal," Sarah Jane said.

"It could," the Doctor acknowledged. "Did it give coordinates?"

"No," she said. "She just said 'I'm at home.'"

"And you didn't know who she was?" asked Cupid.

She shook her head. "No. Maybe? I don't know. I feel like I've seen her before but I can't...remember..."

"That's alright," Cupid said. "We'll figure all of this out together. I assume the TARDIS can trace the signal, Doctor?"

But the Doctor looked torn. "Yes," he said slowly. "It can."

Ginger knew that face well. That was the face he always made when he was in two minds about something and they wanted completely different things. She also knew him well enough to know that he thought he might be risking upsetting her with whatever he was about to say. 

"But?" she prompted.

"I want to follow the distress signal," he said. "Of course I do. I don't want to leave anyone stranded and in trouble. And it's a mystery! You know I love a good mystery!"

"But?" she prompted again, with considerably less patience.

"Ginger, we already have one mystery," he said. "We have to get you home. And find my Ginger. Or at least find out what's been going on! Do we really having time to go chasing ghosts?"

"Maybe it's a clue!" Ginger said. "Maybe it's part of what's going on!"

"Or maybe it has nothing to do with it!" he said. "Maybe it's a distraction!"

"We won't know until we try!" she said. 

"Don't you _want_ to get home, Ginger?"

"That's beside the point! Somebody needs our help! Isn't this what we do, we help people? Or is this universe really that different?"

He finally reached his breaking point. "Yes, that's what we do! And if this is all true, then my Ginger is out there somewhere! Who knows what she could be going through! I won't waste time chasing some signal that may not even be a distress signal if it means she might be suffering somewhere! I won't do it! There's still a chance, however slim, that maybe this is your universe and something else is going on! I don't bring it up to upset you or imply anything, I bring it up because I'm desperate! I don't want to believe that I wasted time here when she was out there somewhere! But since this is the best explanation we have so far, I'm going to believe you without question! And that means that we don't waste any more time not looking for her!"

"Well what have we done?" Ginger asked. "Really? You checked for toxins, you scanned our brains, you looked for void stuff! None of that has been useful!"

"He's running a scan, Ginger," Sarah Jane said. "You know this."

"Right," Ginger said. "A scan. Let's go check on that scan, shall we?" 

She pushed past them into the TARDIS and checked the monitor. 

"No results yet!" she said. "Look at that! Still scanning and we haven't found a thing!"

"You can read Gallifreyan?" the Doctor asked.

She groaned. "Yes, because my Doctor taught me! I can't write in it, but I can read it. You said it would take a while to run this scan. How long will it take?"

"I'm not sure," he said. 

"But it'll be a long while," she insisted. "While we sit around doing what? Staring at the screen? Interrogating Cupid about whatever he can do to help us?"

"I thought you said you thought Cupid would have a lead," the Doctor said.

"And do you, Cupid?" Ginger demanded. "You always know more than you're saying."

"I do," Cupid admitted. "But I don't know anything helpful at the moment."

"See?" Ginger said. "We can't even follow him to anyone else we might be able to ask. So why don't we let the scan run while we trace this signal? What do we have to lose?"

"Time," the Doctor said.

"We're in a time machine," she reminded him. "Try again."

He was trying to find a way out of it. "I don't like this. I don't want to walk away and not be here when the scan finishes."

"We probably won't be gone that long," she said. "I'm doing this with our without you. So you can go against me and make this more difficult, or you can help me. But I'm a Ginger, so we both know you don't like the idea of me being out of your sight when something weird's happening. So go ahead and try to surprise me with your answer."

He was clearly still conflicted and this was making him visibly frustrated. "Fine," he said. "Fine. We'll trace your signal. I hope you're happy with yourself for exploiting the fact that I can't help but care about you."

"I'm not happy about it," she said. "But sometimes I have to do whatever I can to get results."

He took out his sonic again and did a full scan of Ginger before plugging it in like a USB to the main TARDIS console. He turned on a monitor that hadn't been scanning the universe for tears.

"So?" Ginger said. "Do you have a fix on where the signal originated?"

"I do," he said.

"So where did it come from?" she asked.

"Is it from outside the universe?" asked Jack. "Like a homing beacon?"

"No, it's from this universe."

"Well come on them," Ginger said. "Where in this universe?"

"Where else? Wales."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back! Excited to report that I finished getting caught up with Doctor Who last week! I never should've taken 7 years off, but now I'm back! And I have a lot of thoughts. But there's no time for that today. (But I definitely shouldn't write a small AU mini-fic fixing the Master's characterization during the Timeless Child thing, right? Right?)


	11. Cherry Hill

"Wales?" Ginger said, disappointed. "Seriously? We were just there!"

"Not quite," the Doctor said as they touched down. "The signal _is_ coming from Wales, but it's outside the Cardiff city limits and it's not in the 21st century."

"Oh," Ginger said. "Then where?"

...

"1900?" Ginger asked as she followed him through a wooded area. "That's sort of lame. Nothing ever happens in 1900."

"The world's fair happened in 1900," the Doctor said. "It was brilliant."

Ginger and the others watched as he continued scanning with the sonic.

"Remind me again why we didn't just take the TARDIS directly to the place?" she asked.

"Because it's easier to follow the signal on the ground," the Doctor said wearily. "I think we're almost there anyway."

They emerged into a clearing to find themselves standing before a great monstrosity of an estate that would've looked out of place in any time period, but especially in the early 1900s. It looked as if it had been built by a child arranging different shaped blocks together. The main entryway was cuboid with large stone columns, but branching off was a circular structure that reached into the sky. Windows were arranged around the circumference of the dome to let light into the many rooms, except one cuboid shape jutting out near the very top of the dome that contained its own private caged balcony. This cube-shaped structure had an inexplicably triangular roof, jutting up almost like a church spire. There were rooms coming off of the circular main dome, but these were fashioned into twisted towers that seemed to bend like ancient trees. The Doctor found the curious shape of this structure familiar somehow, but he wasn't entirely sure why.

"I've been here before," Ginger said.

"When?" the Doctor asked.

"I don't know," she said. "I think...I think this was the last place I was. Before. But I can't remember."

"Funny sort of place, isn't it?" Sarah Jane asked.

"I know this place," Jack said. "It's Turner Manor. It's supposed to be one of the most haunted places in Wales." He pointed up toward the cuboid room. "That's one of the great mysteries up there. Nobody has ever been able to figure out how you're supposed to get into that room. It's almost like it doesn't exist."

"Like the Red Room," Ginger breathed.

"The Red Room?" the Doctor repeated. "When did you watch Haunting of Hill House?"

She frowned. "I...didn't. I don't think? I don't remember watching it..." But she could suddenly see flashes in front of her eyes of images from that TV show. "Or maybe I did..."

"Let's get inside," Sarah Jane said. "I don't fancy being out here when it starts to rain."

...

If Ginger had thought there was even a slim chance that the inside of the manor would be less strange than the outside, those thoughts were dashed away once she got a closer look. The great domed room had a large pendulum hanging from the ceiling of the sort that would hang off a massive grandfather clock. The walls were all carved with symbols that she didn't recognize.

"Let me guess," she said. "You sonicked us in?"

"Another time skip?" The Doctor asked. 

She nodded. "So where do we start? Is there some infamous Mr Turner we can ask?"

"Turner Manor wasn't named after its occupant," Jack explained. "It was named after how easy it is to get turned around. The corridors wrap around like a maze."

"Great," Ginger muttered under her breath. "Because those always turn out great for us." She held up a hand to signal that everyone should be quiet. "Are we alone here?"

Sarah Jane nodded. "Nobody was home when we knocked."

"Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Jack asked. "There's nothing but silence."

"That may not be true," Cupid said. "Your ears process things that the rest of us aren't capable of understanding. If you hear something, it's worth checking out."

"It's like...music," she said. She listened for a moment. "This way."

She took off down a long winding corridor and the others had no choice but to follow.

"I hear it now," said Sarah Jane.

"Me too," said Jack.

They emerged into a room that was shaped like a prism with multicolored stained glass creating a star-shaped skylight on the ceiling. Just below the skylight was a piano that was playing by itself.

"A player piano?" Ginger asked.

"I don't think so," said Cupid, who was busying himself checking it out. "There's no mechanism for keeping it going. It seems normal."

"Except that it's playing by by itself," said Sarah Jane.

"This song," Ginger said softly. "It's familiar."

"You know it?" asked Jack.

"If anyone would, she would," said Cupid.

"Everyone quiet," she said. She closed her eyes and listened for a moment before picking up the rhythm and beginning to sing under her breath. "I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you..." She shook her head. "This is a slowed down piano version of Simple Plan."

"Simple Plan didn't exist in 1900," the Doctor pointed out.

"But that's what it is," she insisted. "It's almost unrecognisable without the lyrics, but there's nothing else it could be."

The keys slammed as if someone was deliberately trying to scare them. It worked because they jumped. There was a woman standing beneath the skylight next to the piano.

"I'm completely sure she wasn't there before," said Jack.

"Oh so NOW you can see her," Ginger said bitterly, though she was privately relieved.

"This is the ghost you were seeing before?" the Doctor asked.

"Hello?" the ghost said. "Who's there?"

"This is Cupid, Sarah Jane, Jack, and the Doctor-" Ginger began.

The ghost seemed to fade slightly. "I don't need any doctors, I've told you, I'm well now-"

"Not that kind of Doctor," Ginger said, feeling an involuntary stab of sympathy. "My name's Ginger. You summoned me here?"

"Did I?"

"You don't remember? You appeared to me in the woods."

"Oh I don't go outside," the ghost said. "I'm always here."

"Is that you?" She asked, pointing to the piano which was still playing the same song.

"I thought it was you," she said.

"Why would you think it was me?"

"You're the ghost."

A loud noise like a clock striking the hour ripped through the house and the ghost disappeared.

"Okay, creepy," Ginger said. "'You're the ghost.' Like this is The Others with Nicole Kidman."

"But the piano stopped," Sarah Jane said.

"Huh," Ginger said. "So it has."

"Do you think we should look around a bit more?" the Doctor asked.

"Yeah," Ginger said. "I want to get to the bottom of this."

...

They explored the house and found each room to be stranger than the last. 

"Look at this one," Jack said. "It's just a room full of masks."

"Creepy," Ginger said. The whole room was filled with various masks that clung to every square inch of available wallspace.

"What do you think they're for?" asked Sarah Jane.

"To wear, I suppose," said Cupid.

"But who would need this many masks," Sarah Jane replied.

A lion mask opened its mouth. "Ginger," it roared.

They all jumped.

"What the hell?" Ginger said.

"Your many faces," it said. "You hide them from even yourself. You hide so deep in your own mind."

"Wake up!" said an owl mask.

"Wake up!" said a drama mask.

Every mask in the room joined in telling her to wake up. Normally she'd think something like this was funny, but she was shaken for reasons she couldn't explain. She ran from the room, but the taunts didn't stop. Each oil painting on the walls had joined in.

"Ginger, wait!" the Doctor said.

But she didn't run for long before she reached a dead end. She was face to face with an oil painting that wasn't taunting her. 

"It's her," Ginger said. 

It was the ghost, presumably when she was still alive. She didn't look any less sad. She caught sight of the Doctor and smiled. "She's here," the painting said. "But you're wasting time."

Clocks chimed all at once and Ginger realized that this entire passage was lined with clocks. But these clocks didn't have numbers on them. They had messages. 

**Wasting time. Time's running out.**

Ginger put her hands over hears to block out the sound of the chimes. "Stop it," she said. She tore a big one off the wall and threw it to the floor. "Time flies, how 'bout that?"

But the sound only intensified.

"She's here?" the Doctor repeated. "You mean my Ginger? She's here? Where?"

But the painting only smiled. "She never left. She was always waiting for you to come home. So stay." 

The house began to shake.

They had no choice but to run. The house was a labyrinth so they kept getting turned around. The Doctor and Ginger got separated from the others after the staircase switched directions. Ginger nearly fell through the hole that was left behind, but the Doctor grabbed her hand and they kept running. They found their way back to the room with the piano, which was playing another familiar song.

_"O'sailor, why'd you do it?"_

Ginger blinked rapidly to dismiss what was surely a trick of the light. For a moment there, she thought she saw herself at the piano.

"What did she mean?" the Doctor asked. "What did she mean she's here?"

"I don't know!" Ginger shouted. 

The skylight began to crack above them and the Doctor pushed Ginger out of the way in time. 

The Doctor and Ginger stared at each other from the floor. The house shook again and she reached for him out of instinct. A white mask fell from out of nowhere and began to talk as it reached them.

"Tell the truth," it said. "You can't keep lying, so much lying. Even a lie of omission is still a lie."

"What are you talking about?" Ginger asked.

"You lie lie lie," it said. "Do you want to go home?"

"I want to find his Ginger-"

"But do you want to go home?"

"I just want to help-"

"Then why are you here? Why did you come here, so far out of your way? Aren't you wasting time? You did this on purpose, didn't you? Didn't you?"

"Yes," she admitted frantically. "I did. I did it on purpose."

"What?" the Doctor said. 

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to go home!" she admitted. "My Doctor is dead! And you're here! I want to be here! I want to stay! It's killing me! I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry! I'm just another selfish Ginger, I can't let you go!"

He tried to find words to say, but his instincts took over instead. He kissed her. It was like everything else melted away. It had been so long since she'd felt this way. She'd missed it so much. She clutched at his shoulders and kissed him back.

The house stopped shaking and he pulled away slowly. They stared at each other.

"Doctor?" she said.

But the house began shaking again. She glanced at a clock.

**No time.**

"We have to get out of here," the Doctor said.

He helped to her her feet and they ran into the main hall where they met up with the others.

"I think this place isn't gonna last much longer," Jack said. 

The ghost was standing between them and the door.

"Don't leave me," it said.

"I'm sorry," Ginger said. "It's for our own good."

They managed to leave the house just in time for it to crumble down.

... 

They made it back to the TARDIS.

"You'd better check your scans," Ginger said.

"Right," the Doctor said. He checked them and frowned.

"What?" Ginger asked.

"There's nothing," he said. "Nothing at all. No tear anywhere in the universe."

"I don't understand," she said. "How did I get here?"

"Maybe it was a clean transport," Cupid said.

"That's impossible," he replied. 

Cupid looked at Sarah Jane and Jack. "Perhaps it's time to send you both home." He put hands on both of them and teleported them before they could argue.

"How did you do that?" the Doctor demanded. 

"Clean transport."

The Doctor dismissed this with a wave of his hand. "Inside the universe doesn't count. This was supposed to be our lead to finding my Ginger! But there's no trace. Except..."

"Except what?"

"She said 'she's here.'"

"No," Ginger said. "Don't even go there. This is Fringe shenanigans. We've been over this."

"Yeah it's Fringe shenanigans. But what if it's not season 3? What if it's season 4?"

She hadn't considered this. "Absolutely not. You know I-"

"Hate season 4, I know. But you don't really. You just hate one specific part."

"Specifically the part you're talking about."

"You kissed me," he pointed out. "Wouldn't you have felt it if I wasn't me?"

This was a good point. "It's impossible. Isn't it? Cupid?"

Cupid just shrugged. "You will know when you're ready and not before."

"You want to be here," the Doctor said. "You told me you do. Ginger, can't you just accept that you're home?"

Ginger looked at the Doctor - _her_ Doctor - and just knew what she'd been trying to deny. 

"It's you," she breathed. "Of course it's you. I'd know you anywhere. My Doctor."


	12. The Hold Tight

"How are your pancakes?"

Ginger looked down at her pumpkin pancakes with surprise.

"When did we get to IHOP?" she asked.

He frowned. "You're still having time skips? That's worrying. We'll need to find the underlying cause-"

She didn't like the sound of that. "No no no," she said, reaching for his hand. "That's alright. I'm fine, I swear. I'm just glad to be back here with you."

He smiled. "Where you belong. It _is_ where you belong, right? You're not going to want to leave?"

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be," she said. "This, right here...this is everything I want for the rest of my life."

...

The next time skip found them strolling along a riverwalk. Ginger linked arms with the Doctor so she could lean into him.

He smiled and looked down at her. "Someone's very affectionate today," he said.

She rolled her eyes. "Why are you talking about me like I'm a particularly standoffish cat?"

"Because you are a particularly standoffish cat."

She smacked his arm playfully with her free hand.

They walked in silence for a moment before he felt confident to speak again. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," she said. "I am now. All of that was some horrible dream, just like you said...But it was so vivid. Except the last part. That's a little hazy. But I remember what it was like without you. Months and months of waiting. Uncertainty." She found herself blinking back tears.

"It sounds horrible," he said softly.

"It was," she said, her voice breaking. "I've felt some horrible things in my life, but nothing compared to losing you. I couldn't bear it."

"You won't have to feel that way ever again," he assured her. "I'm here."

She reached up to kiss him, stretching up onto the tips of her toes so she could really lean into him. She pulled away to hug him.

...

"Don't leave me."

Time had skipped again, from day to night. Or at least she assumed it was night, it was hard to tell in the den. The lights were low and Corpse Bride was on the TV.

"Hm?" the Doctor said.

She shook her head. "Nothing."

The movie continued on.

_“_ _ This is wrong. I was a bride, my dreams were taken from me. And now.. Now I’ve stolen them from someone else. I love you, Victor. But you’re not mine. _ _”_

Ginger was unsettled by this, but chose not to show it.

Unfortunately, the Doctor knew her too well. "You alright?"

She forced a smile. "Yeah. I'm just...so happy." She cuddled up close to him and moved his arm to put it around her. "I missed you so much. I know it's not logical, but I feel like I haven't seen you in months."

She kissed him and time skipped again. They were in his bedroom.

"We don't have to," he said. "If you need some time to process. I wouldn't want to rush you."

"You're not," she said. "I want you." 

She kissed him, and everything was perfect. Everything was as it should be. And she was happy. They sank onto the bed and began tearing off their clothes. It had been so long since she'd been touched. She hadn't really missed it. But she'd missed him.

"God I've missed this," she said as she straddled him against the headboard.

"Good to have you back," he said with a grin.

"Right back atcha," she said before kissing him again. 

She didn't waste any time. She knew the steps by now, even if she hadn't danced in a while. 

"Touch me," she said.

An image of a dark-haired American woman in a TV show crept into her mind. The woman was saying those same words. She couldn't pin-point the exact show, so she put it from her mind.

"Touch me," she said again, more insistently. 

Their bodies found each other and moved in time. This came so easily, so naturally. It was exactly how she remembered. This was her Doctor. She knew him by all of her senses now: sight, sound, smell, taste, touch.

But yet.

She was seized by a sudden desperation.

"Doctor?" she said softly.

"Yeah?" he gasped.

"Can you do something for me?"

"Anything. Name it."

"Tell me you love me."

"What?" He was willing, he just knew she was so uncomfortable with things like that.

"Please? Would you tell me you love me? Please?"

"I love you," he said.

Her hearts soared even as they broke. "Do you love me?"

"I do," he said. "I love you. I love you, I love you."

She kissed him deeply.

"Don't leave me," she said.

"I won't."

"Stay."

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

"Because you love me?"

"Because I love you."

...

She lay on her side turned away from him. She saw the pocket watch that Cupid had given her had fallen from her pocket and opened.

 **Time's up,** it read.

She blinked and the message changed.

**Out of time.**

"You alright?" he asked, rubbing her arm.

"Perfect," she said. 

He kissed her neck and she couldn't help but smile.

"Was that as good as you remember it?"

She fought to keep her breathing steady. "It's exactly as I remember it," she breathed. "I just want to hold it still in my mind. I just..."

"What?"

"I need to go to the bathroom real quick," she said. She rolled over and planted a kiss on his lips before getting up. 

"Don't be long," he said.

She smiled at him before closing the bathroom door and immediately collapsing against it. She put a hand over her mouth to stifle the sound of the sobs she was no longer able to hold back. The tears came from deep inside of her and cascaded down her cheeks. She sank to the floor and braced herself against the sink.

She was trying so hard not to be heard, but the Doctor could sense that something what wrong.

"Ginger?" he said, getting to his feet and putting on a blue bath robe. No answer. "Ginger, are you alright?

He knocked on the door and she jumped and hastily wiped at her tears as she found to keep her voice steady.

"Fine," she lied. "Wonderful. Everything's wonderful."

He knew that she was lying. "Can I come in?" he asked gently. "I won't if you'd rather be alone."

"That's the problem," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I don't want to be alone anymore. I can't do it. I can't."

He opened the door and saw her on the floor. "Ginger," he said, sinking to his knees and taking her in his arms. "It's alright. Everything's alright now. We're together and everything's alright."

This was too much so she began crying louder. She twisted to look up at him and kissed his cheeks, his forehead, his lips - every inch of his face that she could reach. "Don't let go," she said. "Please don't let go."

She leaned her head against his chest to hear his hearts and he held her tightly. "I won't. I won't let go."

...

Some time later, Ginger and the Doctor emerged into the control room once again. Ginger traced her fingers along the twisted pillars that held up the ceiling like great ancient tree trunks. She loved this design. It was open and warm. Her puffy eyes found Cupid waiting for them.

"You knew the whole time," Ginger said. "Didn't you?"

"I knew what you knew," he said simply.

"But you said I'd know when I knew and not before," she reminded him. "That some truths live within us. That means you knew."

"What's going on?" the Doctor asked. "What did he know?"

"There were the little things that didn't make sense," Cupid said. "On their own, maybe they'd be easier to ignore. You weren't drugged, the universe has no hole in it, your memories are real..."

"We already went through this," the Doctor said. "That's because she belongs here. Right, Ginger?"

Ginger's face was stricken. "And he's not quite right either. I tried to convince myself maybe this was the Good Place-"

"The Good Place?" the Doctor repeated. "When did you watch The Good Place?"

She smiled. "It was one of the first shows I reviewed for the online magazine I worked for. It helped me process."

"Online magazine? What online magazine? I don't understand."

"I know," she said. "Because I don't want to. But you haven't been quite right. Going back and forth between inappropriate flirting and earnestly trying to find your Ginger. It's almost worse than a Sarah Jane who would ever consider not getting involved in a mystery."

"I don't understand. I'm not who you want me to be?"

"You're exactly who I want you to be," she said. "That's the problem. You're exactly perfect. You're so perfect that I know you're not real. I always knew, I just wouldn't let myself think it."

"But I'm not trying to trick you," the Doctor said. "I know who I am and I know that I'm not some trap."

"You wouldn't always know if you were a trap," Ginger said kindly. "Take it from me. But I know you're not. I created you. I couldn't cope and I needed to work this through."

"She created an idea of you," Cupid said. "This is her internal image of you, pieced together from memory."

"It's almost perfect," she said. "Until I look too closely. I romanticized our time together. I won't let myself see it as it was. So I made you perfect. Time moves here like a dream. That's what all the time skips were for. It's hard to remember that you fell asleep when you're dreaming, so of course those are the memories I haven't been able to access. But that's changing."

"Changing how?" the Doctor asked.

"Because I'm so sorry, Doctor, but I remember."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hate to leave you hanging on this cliff, but I'm taking another 2 week break! When I come back, I'll have 3 new chapters!


	13. Addicted

**48 Hours Earlier**

"You're hanging around a lot," Alex Mitchell observed. "I thought you said you were on the run."

"I am," Cupid admitted. "Strictly speaking."

"But?" Alex pressed.

"I've got more pressing concerns," he said. 

Alex nodded. "Like her. I'm sorry I let things get so screwed up."

"Oh my dear girl, I don't blame you a bit," he assured her. "You're so confused all the time with feelings from all sides - it's only natural you'd want to take the easy road to get them to stop. Other Alexes have done a lot worse to achieve that end."

Cupid was always mentioning other Gingers, but rarely mentioned other Alexes. Alex was incredibly curious about her counterparts, but she didn't like the way Cupid said that. "Meaning what?" she pressed.

He smiled sadly. "Not my story to tell, I'm afraid. Let me ask you, my dear, have you been noticing anything strange around here lately?"

"My life's strange. You're gonna have to be a bit more specific."

"Anything hanging around that you know isn't real. Reality distortions of any kind really. It's nothing to worry about, I only wondered-"

"You're a bad liar."

"Hm?"

"'It's nothing to worry about,'" she repeated in a fairly accurate approximation of his Welsh accent. "Don't try to placate me, you won't be able to get one past me. You're worried, so tell me the truth."

He hesitated. "There's nothing to worry about." He could see the frustration rising to her eyes so rushed ahead. "Yet. There's nothing to worry about yet."

"But there could be?"

He nodded. "Soon. If we're not careful. That's why I need you to tell me if you see any warning signs."

"Right, you said reality distortions. I haven't seen anything fitting that description."

"Just keep an eye out, will you? It's potentially important."

She followed his gaze to Ginger's closed bedroom door. "It's bad," she admitted. "I've seen her pretty bad, but this is worse than bad. I don't know what to do."

"I don't know that there's much we can do. I have an option, but I'm trying to save it as a last resort."

"She's not eating. She's just sleeping all day. Her room's always completely quiet. She won't talk."

"She's hit rock bottom. Well, she hit that years ago. The trouble is that at the time, she shut herself down so she couldn't feel the impact. She climbed back up, let herself feel again, then fell right back down there. Now she feels not only the most recent impact, but everything she was shoving down before. It's not an easy hole to climb out of."

"Just tell me she'll be alright," Alex said. 

Cupid couldn't say that with any certainty and knew that he couldn't get a lie past her. "I'll talk to her," he said instead. "It's the least I can do."

"What can I do?" she asked.

"You've been making sure that he stays away, right?"

She nodded. "Yeah. It's really hard though. He really wants to see her and I know how much they mean to each other-"

"He can't be here right now. He'd make it worse. You know he would. He's well-intentioned, but right now she's having a problem that he can't fix."

...

Ginger's room was dark and silent, which was very unusual. She normally had on some show or video or record, but she didn't have the strength to even pretend to follow along. Ginger didn't give any acknowledgement that she knew he was there, but that was the least of his concerns. His main concern is that Ginger wasn't alone.

The woman ceased stroking Ginger's hair and stood up properly, her eyes apologetic and pleading with Cupid to understand. He did. He put a finger to his lips to indicate that she shouldn't wake Ginger. He motioned to her to come closer. When she reached him, he held out a gloved hand which she took. They both instantly disappeared.

...

"Wales again?" the woman asked in a thick Yorkshire accent. "You never change."

"Nor do you," he observed.

"I do!" she protested. "I have done!"

"Blonde hair and a new outfit don't change your habits, Doctor," he replied, noting her rainbow shirt and yellow suspenders. "Points for queer coding, though. I'm almost jealous I didn't pick that one for you myself. Lesbian fashion suits you."

"Are you always so blunt?" the Doctor asked.

He smiled. "Only when it suits me. Ginger's not here to state the obvious, so I felt it was my duty."

"It's funny you should say that," she replied. "Ginger does say something very similar the first time she meets this me. Like father like daughter, I suppose. Though I'm not really your type, am I? You like those tall, dark, and handsome fellas."

"What makes you say that?" Cupid asked curiously.

The Doctor smiled. "I knew it," she said, brandishing a finger. "I knew you hadn't got there yet. Can't put one past me. So where are you, then? Still on the run?"

"I am," Cupid admitted. "Technically speaking."

"But?"

"The Trickster's gone curiously silent," Cupid admitted. "There's been no movement from him or his followers in weeks. Everyone I talk to says he's gone quiet. Completely disappeared."

"And this worries you? Think he's planning something?"

"I'm not sure what to think," he said. "Could also be trying to lull me into a false sense of security."

"So why don't we talk about why you brought me here?" the Doctor asked, anxious to cut to the chase. "I know you're protective of her. We all are, so I respect that. I wasn't interfering, I swear I wasn't. I know you want me to stay away right now, but I just couldn't. I needed to see her."

"Am I meant to take that as a bad sign?" Cupid asked. "Does something happen?"

"No, nothing like that," the Doctor said. "Or at least, it shouldn't. Time's all in flux, you know that. I actually saw her recently...It's just been a long time since I've seen her as she was."

"But why come see her like this? Surely you'd rather remember her when she's happier?"

"It's not about my memory of her," the Doctor admitted. "She feels alone. She shouldn't feel alone. I want to help. But I know you don't want me to-"

"Actually, if I were to ask anyone to help her, I'd ask you."

This surprised her. "Really? But you said-"

"That was to this incarnation. He's bumbling around causing all sorts of trouble. And the incarnation that came after him wouldn't be much help either, as you know. Remember the Milan debacle?"

"I do," the Doctor admitted. "And you're right. I was a bit blunt."

"But you," Cupid said. "I take it you haven't met me in this incarnation yet? Prior to now, I mean."

"I haven't."

"Well I've met this incarnation of you. The impression I got from you in your future more than convinced me that you are the one I'd allow to speak with her when she's like this. So thank you for whatever you've done. I know you love her, so I'm not going to begrudge you the one visit."

"I appreciate that," the Doctor said. "I wish I could stay-"

"But you've got a full house right now, haven't you?" Cupid finished. "Can't be gone too long or your new companions will start asking questions."

"They do that," the Doctor admitted. "Almost makes me miss Ginger sometimes. We never asked questions, that was our rule."

"And look where that got you," Cupid observed. "Maybe you should try being open to your new companions. Can't hurt, can it?"

"It can always hurt," she said. "Sometimes we're just not ready to talk yet."

"And that's okay," Cupid said. "As long as you know you can talk to someone. Now, I assume you climbed in through Ginger's window like the dashing hero you are?"

"I did," she admitted.

"Tell me where you've left that machine of yours and I'll pop you back." 

...

Cupid returned to Ginger's bedroom, where she still hadn't moved.

"Are you awake, my dear?" Cupid asked the stationary lump under the covers. 

She didn't answer.

"Sleeping like the dead then," he remarked. "That'll be just like you."

He knew she was awake because her aura was still active even in this dimmed and defeated state. She was really hurting. He was grateful he couldn't feel it the way that Alex could.

"If it's alright, I'd like to sit with you for a bit," he said. 

She didn't lift her head from the pillow or even bother opening her eyes. "I don't want to talk."

"We don't have to talk. I can just be on standby if you need anything."

"I know what you're thinking."

"Do you?"

"You're thinking I'm being stupid. I should just get up and put myself back together. Buck up and face the day. Fake it til I make it. Whatever."

"I wasn't thinking that. I'm not saying that can't be helpful advice for some, but it would only hurt you more to invalidate your pain that way."

"Then why are you here?"

"May I sit?"

She hesitated before nodding. 

He sat next to her on the bed. "You always think you have to be alone with your pain, and I know that's partially my fault. I couldn't help you and I have to be so distant. If I can help you in any way, I'd like to."

"This is the part where you tell me to just forgive him, right? People have bad breakups all the time and they don't fall apart."

"You keep putting words in my mouth that have no business being there. What you're going through is so much more than a bad breakup. You want me to insinuate that this is all about him so you can get angry about it when we both know that this isn't all about him. It never was. You've been so sick for so long that you mistook a person for a cure. It's a common mistake, and not one anyone begrudges you for."

She still hadn't opened her eyes. He knew how difficult it was for her to muster up the energy to see anything. Her eyes were red-rimmed and puffy from crying and her hair was matted and stuck to her face. She really had been made extraordinarily ill by grief. He brushed her hair away from her face with one gloved hand.

"It's alright to feel how you're feeling," he said. "It's perfectly natural. But I want you to listen to me, because this is very important. If you start seeing things that you know aren't real or experiencing things that don't make sense, I need you to tell me immediately. Don't worry about how it will sound, I just need you to tell me. It's vitally important. Do you understand?"

She was so depressed that she couldn't even find the motivation to question this command. She simply nodded. 

He was satisfied by this reply. Judging by what he was seeing, he doubted they were in the danger zone just yet.

But they were dangerously close.

"I had the strangest dream," she said, her voice small and almost childlike.

He knew she was prone to terrible nightmares. "What was it about?"

"I dreamed there was a woman here," she said. "Blonde hair, tacky lesbian outfit. She was kneeling by my bed..."

_Ginger had awoken to a woman stroking her hair. Under normal circumstances, this would be cause for alarm, but Ginger felt calmed by her presence. The look in her eyes was incredibly familiar, even though she'd never seen her in her life._

_"Have you eaten anything?" she'd asked._

_That's when Ginger realized. "Doctor?"_

_"Shhh..." the Doctor said, quieting her with a finger to her lips. "Don't try to talk just now. You need fluids. I have soup." She retrieved a thermos from her coat. "You like soup. You have to eat."_

_Ginger allowed the Doctor to prop her up on the pillows and stroke her hair gently as she sipped from the flask. Ginger couldn't find the energy to hold the thermos herself, so the Doctor did it for her._

_"That's right," the Doctor said. "It's all going to be fine."_

_"Promise?"_

_"Cross my hearts."_

_"Why are you here?"_

_"Graham told me a funny joke and it reminded me of you."_

_"Who's Graham?"_

_"Never mind that now. Do ya wanna hear the joke or not? Because it's a good one. It's one of those ones that makes me crack up, but Yaz and Ryan just go crickets."_

_"Who's Yaz and Ryan?"_

_"Never mind that!" she insisted. "Do ya wanna hear the joke or not?"_

_Ginger was a bit put out. She had to assume these people were new companions which just set her back to feeling left out. "I dunno," she said, closing her eyes and pressing her face into the pillow. "Might just go back to sleep."_

_The Doctor knew what her mistake had been, but chose not to give up. "Okay, here goes," she said. "It's a real good one, you're gonna like this. It's right up your alley. Why did the alien want to leave the party?" No answer. "Oh come on, Ginger, you've got to play along. Why did the alien want to leave the party?"_

_Ginger knew she wouldn't give up. "Why?" she asked irritably._

_"Because the atmosphere wasn't right!" She rushed right on ahead. "I know, I know, that one's not the best one. But I know you thought it was funny even if you won't say. Give me an eye roll. Anything. No? Alright, I've got one more then. What do you give an alien?"_

_"Some space?"_

_"Right on the money!" the Doctor replied. "Blimey, you're a clever one, never forget that."_

_"It was an obvious joke."_

_"Yeah, but you like it."_

_She did._

_"Is that what you need from me right now?" the Doctor asked. "Some space?"  
_

_"I need sleep," she said._

_"That's alright," the Doctor said kindly. "Long as you remember to wake up. That's very important, Ginger, you have to wake up. But only when you're ready. It's alright to dream now, as long as you wake up later. You know, I didn't just come here to tell you a joke. I met the Solitract today."_

_"The what?"_

_"Right, I forgot, culturally Earthling. I always forget. It's a bedtime story. Except it's real. A whole sentient universe exiled from ours. It was shaped like a frog, if you can believe it! You like frogs! But all it wanted was a friend. It's so lonely, this universe. All on its own with nothing to keep it company. It tried to keep us, but holding on to us was threating to kill us all. I wanted to stay and be its friend, but I knew that wasn't good for either of us. So I told it that. And the funny thing was, I wasn't just talking to it. I was thinking about you. Because I know we've said it over and over in your time, but we haven't been very good at practicing it. I know you and past me just want to be together, but it's not good for either of you. You have to let each other go, at least for a little while. You're going to have to let me go and keep being brilliant. But you won't be alone. You'll have Jack and Alex and...Well, you'll see. You won't be on your own. But only if you wake up." She brushed her fingers against Ginger's forehead. "I know your symptoms manifest like a low-grade brain fever when you're this destabilized, so you won't remember I was here, not for a long while. But I hope you can at least remember to wake up. I know you're not in control right now, and that's alright. But when it's time, I know you'll do the right thing. Because they need your help. They need you. If you want to know the truth, I miss you. I think about you all the time. My companions are always great, they get the job done, but sometimes...I met this sort of demon thing today. Forgot to check it for extra knives. I could just hear you in the back of my head mocking me like..." She approximated Ginger's Scottish accent. "'You didn't check it for a second knife? What are you stupid or something? That's always step one!'" She chuckled then returned to her regular accent. "You're always there with me if I know how to listen. I hope I can be the same for you. But you have to let me go and wake up. It's very important." She kissed Ginger's forehead and stroked her hair. "I hope you know how privileged I am to befriend two sentient universes in my lifetime. Who else gets to say that?"_

"Then I woke up," Ginger said. "Weird dream, huh? Wonder what Jack would say if he knew I had some dream about the Doctor being a woman. I'd never hear the end of it."

Cupid knew it hadn't been a dream, but chose not to say anything.

"I'm here if you need me," he assured Ginger. "For whatever you need. I'm here."

"Cupid?" she asked, her voice breaking.

"Yes, pumpkin?"

"Is it always like this?"

"I don't know what you mean."

"Inevitably, the storybook characters all end with broken hearts. Is it all tragedy? Does it always feel like this?"

"I don't believe so."

"But you don't know for sure?"

"I've never been in love," he admitted. "So I have no way of knowing."

"It hurts so much," she admitted as the tears began flowing again.

"I know and I'm sorry," he said. He wanted to hug her, but that was too risky with his condition. He had to settle for rubbing her arm comfortingly through her blankets. "I'll be here though, as long as you need me. I'm not going anywhere."

...

**An hour later.**

"Isn't there anything we can do?" Jack asked. "I know there are medications we put people on for depression."

"That may not be a good idea," said Thea. 

"Why not?" asked Alex.

"People with depression that's as bad as hers don't respond optimally to medication," Thea explained. "She's at her lowest point, which means she has no energy. She's not a danger to herself when all she can do is sleep. But if she suddenly takes medication and gets her energy back-"

"She'd still be suicidal," Jack said. "And she'd be a danger to herself. I understand. But there has to be something."

A knock came at Alex's door.

"You gonna answer that?" Jack asked.

"Not likely," Alex said. "I'm not expecting anyone, so it's probably someone selling something."

The knock came again.

Alex exchanged a look with Jack and sighed. "Alright, alright, I'm going."

"Look if you're tryna sell religion, I'm not buying," she said as she opened the door.

She immediately regretted the rude greeting because her visitor was a stunning beauty. Her wavy black hair was interwoven with streaks of purple and was held up with a gold headband and twisted over her right shoulder. Her gold-and-white sleeveless Bohemian dress matched her gold-flecked eyeshadow which complimented her light brown skin very nicely.

"I'm actually more spiritual myself," she said, her voice tinged with the slightest bit of amusement.

 _Oh no, she's even got a hot voice,_ Alex despaired internally.

The writer in her wanted to compare that voice to honey.

 _Cut it out, you dumb lesbian,_ she thought. _Say something._

"Yeah," she laughed awkwardly. "Cheers."

_Cheers? I swear to god-_

If anything though, this newcomer was more amused than ever by this minimal response. "Yeah sure," she said. "Listen, you're Alex Mitchell right?"

"Maybe," she replied suspiciously. "I can be someone else if you like that better."

She mentally kicked herself. She'd been trying for a cool line like Jack would do. In her head it had sounded like "I can be anyone you want me to be", but when it went through the Alex Filter it inevitably turned into that.

The girl smiled. "I'm sure I'll like you just fine. I'm just moving into the building and I heard about you. You organized that massive rent strike across all the properties last summer, right?"

"I did," she said. "You can thank me for how cheap rent is around here now. I worked hard on that. That bloke Hatfield was scamming us and during a pandemic, no less. Talk about greed. This rich men say it's just standard for the area, but it's only standard because they all agreed on that. Nobody can afford those prices, especially with quarantine. So I did what I could. Made a lot of enemies, but it was worth it. Still see that Hatfield bastard around sometimes and he gives me the evil eye, but that's just fine with me."

She hoped she was sounding cool and heroic. She was dead nervous.

"What, eh, what unit did you move into?" Alex asked.

"A1," she replied, still with that same amusement that Alex couldn't find a cause for. "Hatfield's old rooms."

"Is he not living there anymore? Good riddance to the bastard."

"He died," she said, without even a bit of sadness. "I'm his daughter. Nova Hatfield, nice to meet you."

There it was, the confirmation that she'd once again put her foot in her mouth. "Oh. Oh I'm sorry. I didn't realize-"

"Nah, it's all good," Nova replied. "I mean like it's not _good_ good, but my dad and I were estranged. It was complicated or whatever. He was kind of a dick to everyone. I heard about you though. Always wanted to meet you. Real impressive. I had the choice in any of the managerial apartments in his properties, but I gave them all away except this one. Wanted to meet Alex the Rebel."

Alex's face felt curiously warm. "Rebel? Me. Nah."

"Sure you are. Told my dad what's what, didn't you? I'm your new property manager now, but please don't think of me as your landlady. I just hate that. Come to me with any questions and requests and we'll work something out. Here's the deal, though..."

"What is it?" she asked nervously. "Rent hike?"

"The opposite, actually," Nova said. "I inherited all my dad's money and assets when he died, so I'm pretty much loaded for life. So I'm canceling rent on all properties. You're still in charge of whatever utilities you use, because I have no control over that, but I won't charge people for basic human necessities. You should also know that I've spent my entire life since I was 16 going to trade schools, so if you need help with plumbing or electrical, I'm fully certified free of charge."

This seemed too good to be true. "What's the catch?"

"No catch, Alex Mitchell," Nova replied. "You inspired me, is all."

Jack cleared his throat to remind Alex of his presence.

Nova hadn't realized they weren't alone. "Oh sorry. Do you have company?"

"Sort of?" Alex said. She opened the door a bit wider so Nova could see inside. "Nova, this is, uh, my Uncle Jack."

Jack came forward with a hand outstretched. "Captain Jack Harkness, pleased to meet you."

"Stop it," Alex said in a disgruntled tone.

"I was just saying hello," he protested good-naturedly. "Can't say hi to anyone around here. Like father, like daughter."

Nova noticed Thea. "And who's this?"

"That's just Thea," Alex said. "She's around a lot."

Cupid left Ginger's room at that moment and couldn't help but smirk when he saw Alex's aura. "Everything alright out here, ladies?"

"This your roommate?" Nova asked.

"No, no," Alex said quickly. "This is my roommate's, eh, sort of dad-like thing."

"Sort of dad-like thing," Nova repeated. "You've got a way with words, Alex Mitchell. Anyway, I've got to be getting back. I've got one property I still haven't decided what to do with."

"What's that?" asked Alex.

"It's just this creepy old haunted manor in Wales that my dad bought 10 years ago," Nova explained. "He was obsessed with it, always trying to find out its secrets. He never cared about anything as much as he cared about that house. Anyway, it's mega haunted or whatever. So I can't decide whether I should start giving away rooms or not. Also doesn't help that the house is a major mystery and extremely ugly. To tell you the truth, I'm not looking forward to being back there by myself, but I need to go through and tag the things I want. I can't take most of it, because it's a historical site and a buyer is supposed to come look at it tomorrow. But whatever stuff actually belonged to my family has to be sorted out."

Cupid sensed an interesting opportunity. "A haunted mansion, you say?"

"Ginger would love that," Jack said.

"My thoughts exactly," Cupid smiled. "Would you need any help? Or at least some company? Alex's roommate, Ginger, is a bit of an amateur ghost hunter."

Alex glanced at them as if to say _what are you doing_.

"Yeah," Nova said, evidently relieved that they'd offered. "Actually, I could use the company. It's a bit of a drive though."

"We'd be more than happy to help," Cupid assured her.

...

Ginger still wasn't ready to see anyone when Cupid knocked on her door and let himself in.

"Thought you were going," she said sullenly.

"I was, but I got an interesting preposition," he said. "We've been invited on an expedition and I wondered whether you might want to tag along. Might help take your mind off it."

She sighed with frustration. "Cupid, I'm really not in the mood right now. I would rather keep my mind on it, at least for the time being."

"Alright," he said, as he began closing the door. "If you need us we'll be at a haunted mansion in Wales on a ghost hunting mission."

He closed the door but didn't have to wait long before she opened the door a crack.

"Ghost hunting?" she repeated.

"Yes, my dear," he said. He gestured to Nova. "This lovely young woman was kind enough to invite us."

Ginger's eyes landed on the stranger. "Where did you say this was?"

"Turner Manor," Nova explained. 

"I've heard of that," Ginger said. "It's one of the most haunted sites in Britain. It's the one with the weird design, right?"

Nova nodded. "That's the one."

Ginger was torn. On the one hand, it would be nice to be alone. But on the other...

"Is Jack coming?" she asked.

"Wouldn't miss it," he smiled.

"I'm in. I need to shower and find something goth to wear." She closed the door abruptly.

"Sorry," Alex said. "That's Ginger for you. A bit blunt."

Nova held up a hand to stop her from apologizing. "Say no more. I'm kind of obsessed with her already."

 _Great,_ Alex thought with a pang of irrational jealousy. _Already obsessed with someone who isn't me. Figures._

"We'll meet you there, my dear," Cupid said to Nova. "No use holding you up."

...

The Doctor knew he wasn't allowed to see Ginger, but he felt he needed to be on standby in case something happened. The problem was that waiting was equal parts boring and stressful. Every moment he wasn't active was another moment he conjured up horrible images of worst-case scenarios.

He'd watched Jack leave Alex's apartment not ten minutes earlier, so was interested when he returned with an overnight bag.

"Moving in?" the Doctor asked.

"Becoming a stalker?" Jack asked. "Because you know she doesn't want you to be out here right now."

"I don't get it," the Doctor said. "She's forgiven you and Alex, but she's still upset with me?"

"You know it's different with you," Jack says. "For the record, I'm not mad at you. I'm ready for this all to blow over so things can go back to normal. But she needs time. Which is why we're going out of town."

"Oh?" the Doctor said. "Where are you heading?"

"Just outside Cardiff," he said. "Famous haunted house called Turner Manor. We're going ghost hunting to take her mind off things."

"That's good," he said. "That's a good sign."

"You can't come," Jack said, seriously.

"I wasn't-"

"You were. I'm not telling you this so you can come, I'm telling you so you know where we are. There's a difference. I want you there, I think it would be fun. But this is about her. I need you to respect that."

The Doctor was visibly put out. "Alright. I won't come."

Jack could see that he was upset, so clapped him on the shoulder. "This _will_ blow over. She's been upset with you before, she always forgives you in the end."

"I always worry that one day she won't," he admitted. "Forgiveness doesn't come natural to her. I can only expect it to stretch so far."

"Then stop giving her things she needs to forgive you for," Jack said. "And anyway, it's not like she doesn't have a fair amount to apologize for herself. It's just that she's too sick right now to make that the priority. Give her time. She loves you. She'll talk to you when she's ready."

...

Cupid gathered Ginger, Alex, and Jack in Alex's living room.

"Alright, everyone link arms and be very quiet," Cupid said. "This is easiest to do when it's just one person. At a stretch, I can do two. Three is my absolute limit and only with concentration."

"Is anyone else taking notes?" Jack flirted.

"Stop it," Alex protested.

"Let's get a move on," Ginger said. "I don't want to stand around here all day."

"I can take someone," Thea said brightly.

"Don't start," Alex warned Jack. "I'll go with her. You two go with Cupid."

Ginger and Jack stood on either side of Cupid and linked arms while Alex grabbed hold of Thea.

"I need to calculate my wormhole point of entry and velocity," Thea said. "Where did you say this was?"

"Turner Manor," Cupid explained. "Wales. Let's give it three hours on the dot. Try to time it with Nova's likely arrival."

"Easily done," Thea replied.

"Everyone ready?" Cupid asked. "If you're ready, don't say anything. Perfect. This may be easier on you if you close your eyes. I find humans experience mild nausea and disorientation more often if they teleport with open eyes. Alright. At the ready now...Three...two..."

Everyone closed their eyes. Within seconds, Ginger could feel a slight breeze playing with her hair.

"You can open 'em now," Cupid said.

Ginger opened her house to find that she was on a clearing by the coast of Wales. If she'd turned around, she'd notice a tree line behind her, but she was far too distracted by what was before her. The house looked as if it had been built by a child arranging different shaped blocks together. The main entryway was cuboid with large stone columns, but branching off was a circular structure that reached into the sky. Windows were arranged around the circumference of the dome to let light into the many rooms, except one cuboid shape jutting out near the very top of the dome that contained its own private caged balcony. This cube-shaped structure had an inexplicably triangular roof, jutting up almost like a church spire. There were rooms coming off of the circular main dome, but these were fashioned into twisted towers.

"What a weird-shaped house," Alex said.

"Those towers look kinda like churros," Ginger said. "Is anyone else hungry?"

Cupid took that as a positive sign.

"It's very Lemony Snicket," said Alex.

"I guess so," remarked Ginger. "I was thinking Tim Burton, but either works."

A sudden noise ripped through the courtyard, disturbing the air with sudden winds. But the assembled friends weren't alarmed.

"You've _got_ to be kidding me," Ginger muttered. She marched off in the direction of the woods, which was where the noise was emanating from.

When the Doctor stepped out of his TARDIS, it wasn't to the fanfare he expected. In fact, it was to rather more disgruntled faces. Ginger, in particular, looked livid as she glared at him with arms crossed.

"Did somebody say ghost hunting?" he asked.

Ginger rolled her eyes with a disgruntled 'ugh' as she decided to walk away rather than engage.

"What?" the Doctor asked. "What did I say?"

"Who told him?" Ginger demanded. "Who invited the giraffe?"

Alex sighed heavily. "Jack, _really_?"

"What?" he asked.

"I can feel your guilt, dummy," she said. She was soaking up Ginger's irritation as well as his guilt, and as affectionate as she was toward him it was very hard to differentiate.

"It's not my fault," Jack protested. "I told him _not_ to follow us!"

Ginger put her hands on her hips. "And you thought he'd listen to you? You're not the first person to tell him to stay away from me. He never listens."

"Well I'm here now," the Doctor said. "I even brought an overnight bag."

Ginger looked at him incredulously. "I don't see an overnight bag."

"Sarah Jane has it," he said.

Ginger frowned. "Sarah Jane is here?"

"That's right," Sarah Jane said, throwing the bag to the ground. "This is heavy. What's in this thing?"

"Probably her royal highness's matched luggage," Ginger muttered. "At the very least an industrial strength hairdryer."

"Provisional field repair kit for Thea, some ghost hunting instruments, an extra bow tie," he explained.

"How did Doc rope you into this one?" Alex asked Sarah Jane.

"The Doctor picked me up on the way," she said. "Said there's some ghost hunting to do."

The Doctor noticed something. "Did you get a new bag?"

Ginger looked down at her new red-and-black plaid bag that had a little black leather band winding around it like a belt. It had many enamel pins on the front. "Yeah. Why?"

"Dunno," he said. "Just never pictured you without the Harry Potter one."

"Ah well," she said. "You dropped me in 2021. Come to find out JK Rowling said some things last year that I can't morally align myself with. Decided to stop advertising that I'm a Harry Potter fan. You know, in case people see it and think I might be a TERF or something."

"Is that Nova's car?" Jack asked.

A green electric car was approaching them.

"So am I staying or am I going?" the Doctor said. "Let me remind you that I seem to be the only one of us who packed actual equipment."

Ginger deliberated a moment before realizing he was right. She sighed with frustration. "I can't tell you what to do. Just stay out of my way and leave me alone. Oh and also, if you want that hot air machine, Doc, you carry it. Shame on you, making Sarah Jane carry that pack. You have arms, do it yourself."

She stormed off in the direction of the house. Alex shrugged apologetically at him before she and the rest of the group followed Ginger. The Doctor sighed and picked up his pack.

Nova jumped out of the car. "You made it here before me!" she said. "How on _Earth_ did you make it here before me?"

"Wrong question," Ginger muttered.

Nova noticed the Ginger had changed into a long black dress with a long purple hooded cloak. "More goth," she remarked. "I like it."

"Are we going inside or what?" Alex asked.

"Right," Nova said. She started to turn when she noticed the additional members of the group. "Oh, sorry, I don't know that we've met. Who are you?"

"Oh I hope it's okay," Alex said. "My parents just sort of turned up." 

Sarah Jane opened her mouth to introduce herself, but the action was taken away from her by Alex.

"This is my mum, Sarah Jane," Alex explained. "She's a journalist. And this is-"

The Doctor reached for his psychic paper. "The Doctor. I'm a sort of parapsychologist."

"Sort of?" Nova asked. "Intriguing. You'll have to tell me more. So, Alex, you brought along your parents and you uncle." She smiled at Jack. "Which side of the family are you on? Let me guess..." She looked back and forth between Jack, Sarah Jane, and the Doctor. "I think I see it now. You're brothers! Yes, you look so much alike."

The Doctor and Jack exchanged a look.

"We do?" they asked.

Nova smiled. "Everyone follow me now."

Nova led them to the front door which was carved with many symbols and ornate locks.

"Nova," Ginger said. "What are these symbols?"

"No one knows," Nova said. "Code breakers have come from the world over to try to decipher them. Nothing. They seem to correspond to the locking mechanism in some way, but we're not sure how. Mr. Moorhouse, the man who built the house, was said to be a paranoid man. He talked often of protecting his wife from the world outside, as well as keeping his own discoveries inside."

"Discoveries?" Sarah Jane asked. "Was he a scientist?"

"Oh yes," Nova said. "Legend has it that he hid the secret to eternal life in this house before he died."

"He died?" Ginger asked. "Must not've been a very good secret then."

Nova smiled at the joke as she removed a brass key from her pocket. "This is the only key that works," she explained. "It only fits into the lock right here..."

She fit the weirdly jagged edges of the key into a lock on the right side of the door. In response to the turning of the key, a few of the other locks clicked and turned as well. A few of the weird symbols on the door seemed to rotate along with the locking mechanism to make them settle into a completely new configuration. The door opened.

"Alright," Nova said. "If you think that's weird, just wait til you see what's inside."

Everyone began filing in after her except the Doctor, who was still tracing his fingers along the carved figures on the door. Ginger was loathe to even acknowledge his existence right now, but her curiosity was getting the better of her.

"Do you think it's some sort of language?" she asked.

"I think so," the Doctor said. "If so, it's wonderfully complex."

"The TARDIS isn't translating it," she pointed out. "How come it only does that selectively?"

"To give me some semblance of mystery, I expect," he said. "This could be anything. Equations, words, pictograms...Whatever it is, it seems to be hexagonal and far more complex than even Circular Gallifreyan." He scanned it with the sonic. "Hm."

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing," he said.

"No, seriously, you can tell me."

"I am," he said. "There really is nothing. The sonic isn't telling me anything particularly useful."

The door's locking mechanism began rotating back towards its starting position and they both leapt away from it.

"You two had better get inside," Nova called. "The door automatically relocks itself after 60 seconds."

"Advanced locking mechanism for the 19th century," the Doctor muttered as he and Ginger stepped inside.

"Now that we're all inside," Nova said. "This is the main hall. Those of us familiar with the house call it the dome or the egg."

"But what's it hatching?" Ginger asked, noting a clicking noise. "Hmmm...What _is_ that mysterious ticking noise?"

"Oh that?" Nova asked. She pointed up to the ceiling, where a large pendulum like one from a clock was waving rhythmically. "Mr. Moorhouse was obsessed with clocks. There's at least one in every room, except of course the clock room which is entirely clocks. His great hobby was building clocks."

Ginger noticed an egg-shaped clock on the wall. "That clock is wrong. It says it's 7 o clock."

"Good eye," Nova said. "The clocks are 6 hours behind. Problem is that nobody can figure out how to open them to fix them, but apart from that they're in perfect condition."

"Question," Alex said. "You said this place was made by a Mr. Moorhouse. So why's it called Turner Manor?"

Nova smiled. "Because of all the twists and turns. It's easy to get lost." She walked over to a glass box mounted on the wall and retrieved some laminated sheets of paper which she handed out. "There are maps. They'll help keep you grounded. Who wants to explore before dinner?"

"I'm definitely up for it," Alex said. "But can we put our overnight bags down first?"

"Right, that's practical, isn't it?" Nova asked. "I get ahead of myself. Let's pick your rooms first. All of them are equally creepy, so I apologize in advance."

The Doctor leaned toward Ginger. "Did you notice that there are more of those symbols on the walls?" he asked.

"I did," she admitted. "But that still doesn't mean you're allowed to talk to me."

She followed the others up a staircase while Thea lingered behind with the Doctor. 

"I don't recognize them either," Thea said. "The symbols, I mean. There are a number of repeating characters that suggests to me that your supposition of a language or equation might be likely. It is a spectacularly complex writing system."

"Can you run it through your decoding programs?" he asked.

"Already on it," she said, tapping her forehead. "I've been taking pictures of each symbol cluster we come across with my pupil cameras and I'm running them through constant diagnostics for a match. So far, there's no similarity to any known language."

"I thought so," he said. "Keep trying though."

...

Nova took them up the first flight of stairs to the first landing that curved around the dome-shaped wall.

"There are four main floors," she explained. "All accessible from these landings. There are glass barriers instead of banisters and as near as we can tell, they're bulletproof. As long as you're out on these landings, you should be able to hear anyone on any of the others, because it echoes so much."

"Bullet proof glass in 1900?" Ginger asked.

The Doctor nodded. "Bit anachronistic."

The first bedroom they looked at held a bed and a small desk, but was mostly cluttered with books. Every square inch of the room was plastered with bookshelves or mad scribblings that may have been blueprints if they made any sense.

"Nobody's been able to make sense of those," Nova said as the Doctor took a closer look. "Some of them seem to correspond in some way to the house, but we're not sure. There are whole forums online about it."

"I'll take this room," the Doctor said. 

"Don't be so hasty," Nova said. "I know it looks innocent compared to the other rooms, but it's actually one of the creepier rooms. Things happen in here when it gets dark."

"Good," he said. "Because I didn't pick it based on looks. I want a chance to go through his notes."

"Alright," Nova said. "If you insist. Doctor Mitchell, Mrs Mitchell, I'll leave you to it-"

"What?" Sarah Jane and the Doctor said in unison. "Oh no no no..."

"We're not," Sarah Jane said.

"Not like that," the Doctor replied.

"I'm sorry," Nova said. "I just assumed when Alex said-"

"We're her parents," Sarah Jane said. "But first of all, my last name is Smith. We adopted her several years ago."

"Ohhhh," Nova said. "Yeah, that makes sense. I was _thinking_ that she looks way more like you than she does like him."

Alex was torn between feeling flattered that Nova thought she looked like Sarah Jane and sad that she didn't look more like the Doctor. Back in his last regeneration, they'd looked so much more alike. But at least she looked like Sarah Jane. To Alex, Sarah Jane was one of the most beautiful women who had ever lived. She felt it was an honor to be compared to her at all.

Nova looked at the Doctor. "Also if you don't mind me saying, I _thought_ you looked a little young to be her biological father. I mean I was very impressed that you bagged a milf like that but-"

"I look good for my age," he assured her. 

"Right," she said. "Sorry for the mix up. So you'll definitely be wanting a separate room, Miss, eh, Smith?"

"That would be nice, thank you," Sarah Jane replied.

"Follow me, then," said Nova.

They could hear the next room before they arrived.

"Hmmm..." Ginger said again. "What is that mysterious ticking noise...Kinda...catchy..."

"Maybe later with the Potter Puppet Pals, eh Ginger?" asked Alex.

They entered a room that, apart from the bed, was entirely devoted to clocks. They were all over the shelves and the walls and even the tables were covered in partially finished clocks.

"I want this one," Ginger and Cupid both said.

Cupid smiled. "You should take it, my dear. I insist."

"Don't know why you'd want that," Alex said. "I wouldn't be able to get any sleep with all this ticking."

"Mr. Moorhouse was obsessed with time," Nova explained. 

"I can relate," Ginger said under her breath. "So I've got this one. Are we having food soon? I'm starved."

"I'll order a pizza when everyone's settled," said Nova. "Meet us in the main hall in 10 minutes."

"Got it," she said.

The group moved onto the next bedroom.

"I think I know exactly what this one was for," Jack teased.

It was lined wall to wall with mirrors, including the ceiling. 

"Yeah, don't want this one," Alex said. "Last haunted house type thing with mirrors spooked me out too much."

"You've done this before?" Nova asked.

"Not exactly," she said. "Sort of. My friends and I, we sort of investigate weird occurrences. Usually aliens. Mum and dad insist there's no such thing as ghosts, so I've never even looked into it."

"My experience with ghosts is they're usual disturbances in the fabric of spacetime," Jack said.

"As is mine," said Sarah Jane.

"I've seen memories of traumatic events manifested through nanotechnological quantum transducers," explained Jack. "Another time Toshiko and I were transported back to 1941 through a temporal shift that was meant to make us desperate enough to open the Rift and let in what was essentially a fifty foot tall demon." 

"So like a typical Torchwood Tuesday then?" Alex joked. "What about you, Mum?"

"Mine wasn't nearly that dire," Sarah Jane smiled. "Clyde, Rani, and I discovered an alien scientist who was trying to open a portal to his home dimension and ended up trapping innocent children in the crossfire."

"You talk about this all so casually," Nova teased. "This isn't like top secret is it? You're not gonna wipe my mind or anything?"

"Haven't decided yet," Jack teased back.

"We don't do a lot of that these days," Alex admitted. "Things have been real boring lately."

"Hopefully ghosts will liven things up then," said Nova.

"I'll take this room," Jack said. "I've just decided."

"Good, it's settled," Nova said. "Ten minutes, yeah?"

He saluted her with two fingers then began exploring the room.

"Good looking bloke," Nova admitted once they were out of earshot. "Bit old for me, but if I looked that good I'd probably feel more comfortable in the mirror room too. Sorry, is that weird to say?"

Alex shrugged. "A bit."

"This double room here was supposed to be a bit of a guest suite," Nova said. "They never finished constructing it. They didn't have to, they never entertained guests. Famously reclusive."

This room was fairly boring compared to the others. The walls were, of course, weirdly constructed. The ceiling was weirdly low and the walls sloped inward. It was a rather claustrophobic effect. There was a partition in the center, separating the room into two parts either with a separate identical bed and side table.

"I'll take one side," Thea said brightly. "Who wants to bunk with me?"

Alex was just thinking that it was a good thing Jack wasn't there to hear that when...

"I'm sure many would jump at the opportunity, my dear," Cupid said. "To protect your dignity, I'll take the adjoining room."

"Excellent," Nova said. "Now, moving on..."

She led Alex and Sarah Jane to the end of the corridor. "You'll like this one," Nova said as she opened the door and flicked a red light on.

"What is this?" Alex asked.

"The darkroom."

"The darkroom?" Alex said. "Ginger's gonna be so mad she picked the clock room when there's one literally called a darkroom."

"No, Alex, she means _darkroom_ ," Sarah Jane said as it dawned on her. Photographs plastered the walls and there were stations to develop them all around. "This place is for developing photography."

"Ohhh," Alex said as she understood. Now she recognized it. She'd seen this stuff before in movies. "Yeah. I knew that."

"Do you mind if I take this one?" Sarah Jane asked her, indicating a small uncomfortable looking bed situated in a corner. "I enjoy looking through old records."

"Go for it," Alex shrugged.

"So that leaves only one other bedroom," Nova said as she guided Alex along the maze-like corridors of the house.

"In a house this big?" Alex asked. "What are the other rooms?"

"Laboratories, conservatories, game rooms," Nova shrugged. "You name it, really. There will be plenty of time for exploring later. Here we are. The mask room."

"The what?"

The door swung open and it was exactly what the name implied. Every square inch of wall space was dedicated to various types of masks - from the classic drama mask to the masquerade to everything in between. 

"Creepy, huh?" Nova said as she walked inside.

"Yeah," Alex said. "That about sums it up."

"Room is still preserved exactly as the original owners left it," Nova said. "They all mostly are, with a few notable exceptions of my dad's stuff still lying around." She picked up a partially painted mask on a table. "The legend has it that this is the last mask the original owner's wife was painting when she died." She put it back down.

Alex became aware that they were alone together in a bedroom. Well, not exactly alone. She couldn't help but feel watched under the empty gazes of the hundreds of masks. She tried to lean against a wall in order to look cool and casual and unbothered, but accidentally leaned against a bird mask which immediately fell off the wall. She had to scrambled to put it back up while still maintaining her dignity.

But Nova noticed. "You alright?" she asked.

"Yeah, yep," Alex said as she righted herself. "Tip-top." 

_Tip-top?_ she berated herself. _Seriously, Mitchell, pull it together._

"So, uh," Alex said in an effort to make conversation. "Where do you sleep?" She immediately blushed furiously as she realized how that sounded.

"Why?" Nova said with a crooked grin. "Did you want to join?"

Alex's mind completely shut down. "No, no, I mean that's fine, I was just, I wasn't asking really I was just-"

Nova put up her hands in a peaceable gesture. "It's alright, Alex, it's fine. Cool down," she chuckled. "You don't have to explain. You were just making conversation, I get it. I'm up in the master bedroom. All my dad's stuff will be up there, so I thought it was best if I take it. But now you'll know where I'll be. You know, in case sleeping with these masks gets too creepy."

Nova swept past her out of the room as Alex's mind struggled to keep up with what had just happened there.

...

Ginger consulted her map. This place was very confusing, but she thought she was going in the right direction. She passed the door to the Doctor's room and saw there was still movement in there so stopped in her tracks. She wondered if anyone had told him about the pizza. Probably not. But it wasn't her job to tell him, right? He should just figure it out. 

After a moment's deliberation, she knocked lightly on the open door.

The Doctor looked up from the stack of papers he was rifling through.

Ginger put up a hand to stop him from speaking first. "Don't bother saying anything, I'm just supposed to tell you that we're supposed to be downstairs for food soon."

"Downstairs?" he repeated.

"Yeah," she said flatly. "As in the part of the house that is down the stairs. Look, it's pizza, so if you want some, you'd better be down there quick."

Alex chose that moment to interrupt. "Hey Doc, I was just coming to make sure you know about the pizza."

"Ginger was filling me in, thanks Alexia," he smiled.

She was startled by the formal greeting. "Yeah sure," she said. In her mind, it wasn't unusual to find the Doctor and Ginger talking and she'd been so distracted that she hadn't remembered they were in a fight. "Oh wait, Ginger told you? So you two are talking again, is that it?"

"No, no," Ginger said hurriedly. "I was asked to fill the Doctor in, so I'm filling him in. Believe me, it wasn't my first idea."

"Oh really?" Alex asked, crossing her arms and eyeing her with some amusement. "Someone asked you to fill him in? Who?"

She floundered for a moment. "J-Jack," Ginger said. "Jack asked me-"

"Jack asked you to what?" Jack asked as he joined them. He turned to the Doctor. "I just realized that nobody told you about the pizza, Doctor. We're all supposed to go downstairs."

Ginger was mortified. "I meant Sarah Jane!"

But it was too late. The Doctor had caught on. "Sarah Jane?" he teased. "Sarah Jane asked you to?"

"Yeah that's right," Ginger glared.

"Right," he grinned. "You just came to tell me about the pizza because you were asked to. Not because you secretly care a little bit?"

Ginger groaned with frustration and swept out of the room. Alex rolled her eyes and shared a knowing look with the Doctor. 

"You're pushing," she said, though her voice was tinged with amusement. "You're not wrong, but it's a little early to be pushing."

But he was satisfied with the results. "Yeah," he said. "I'll keep an eye on that."

"Anyway," Alex said. "Pizza, yeah?"

"Be right down," he said. "Actually, can you two help me carry some of this downstairs? I want to get my equipment and at least some of this paperwork downstairs. Maybe I can work while we eat. Terribly inefficient, eating. Can't we just learn to photosynthesize like a respectable species? I tried it for a summer once, but never really got a knack for it."

"For what?" Alex asked. "Photosynthesizing?"

"Among other things," he said mysteriously.

...

"There you are," said Sarah Jane as the three of them emerged into the mail hall. "Nova's out paying for the pizza. We're about to start in here."

She led them through the door into one of the tower-shaped structures that branched off of the main dome. The Doctor glanced upward to see yet another skylight above them. One of the walls ballooned outward and seemed to create a prism of stained glass. The only thing in that part of the room was a singular piano.

"When did it start raining?" he asked.

"It's been in the forecast all day," Nova said as she arrived with the pizza. "Didn't you check the weather?"

"Nah, I never check the weather," the Doctor said. "Every day's an adventure. How boring would it be if I knew what each day would bring for me?"

"Sometimes he does check the weather report," Ginger said. "Just so he can disrupt local weather patterns. It drives weather reporters up the wall."

Nova evidently thought she was joking, but Alex leaned over to mumble in his ear. "You can do that?"

"If I concentrate," he said in a low voice. "Temporary atmospheric disturbances aren't that difficult to create if you know what you're doing. You just have to be very careful with them."

"Looks like you brought the whole room down with you," Nova said.

The Doctor looked down at the stack of papers in his hands. "Oh this? Yeah. Thought I could get some reading done while we eat. But give me a moment to do some preliminary readings." He removed a large contraption from his bag.

"What's that do?" Ginger asked. "Hope that isn't an EMF meter."

He scoffed. "An EMF meter? Do you take me for some amateur?"

"I'm confused," Nova said. "Ghost hunters are always in here with EMF meters. I thought they were standard ghost hunting equipment."

"Maybe if you don't understand science," Ginger said. "EMF will give you a false positive."

"Electromagnetic frequencies are around us all the time," the Doctor explained.

"An EMF recorder will tell you they're around, but not the source. People think it's ghosts when really it's power lines, microwaves, and radios. What you really should be looking for is infrasound."

The Doctor was impressed. "Which is what I'm doing. The sonic has trouble registering infrasound because of the nature of how it works. This device should tell us if there's any infrasound."

"What's infrasound?" asked Alex.

"It's a sort of white noise, is how I understand it," Ginger said. "It's almost unnoticeable to the human ear, but it has been proven to cause inexplicable feelings of dread and hallucinations associated with hauntings."

"You know a lot about this," the Doctor said.

"Ghosts are on my list," she said. "It's aliens, then witches, then ghosts."

"So it's all about debunking ghosts?" Nova asked.

"No," Ginger said. "Not at all! I want to believe! But i have to rule out all other possibilities first!"

"There's nothing here," the Doctor said. "We're clear. No infrasound."

"Well now that's settled, are we going to move to a dining hall or something? I'm starved."

"Why?" Nova shrugged. "There's no telly in there and it's all stuffy. We can eat in here. Just mind the antique furniture and we'll be fine. Why don't you go ahead and put that stuff down and we'll eat. I didn't know what to get for everyone, so I've got an all cheese, an all pepperoni, and one with mushrooms and olives as well."

The Doctor, Jack, and Alex put their papers and equipment down on the end tables. Jack and Alex moved to get some pizza.

"What did you say this place was?" the Doctor asked.

"Historical landmark," Nova said. "It's on all the ghost hunting tours, but nobody's ever been able to crack it."

"Yeah, but why are we here?"

Nova glanced at the others. "You didn't fill him in? Blimey, that's a long drive to spend not talking about what we're doing. My dad was a property developer. He bought this place when I was a teenager, he was obsessed with it."

"You say 'was'," the Doctor said. "I take it he's not anymore?"

Nova's smile almost faltered. "He passed away recently. In the house, actually. I've got to get what little he actually had out of here before the buyer comes tomorrow."

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said.

"It's alright," she said. "He was a bit of a dick. Alex can tell you."

The Doctor raised his eyebrows at Alex.

"He was my landlord," she shrugged.

"The one you protested against?" he asked. "Blimey..."

"You remembered," Alex said, touched that in his chaotic life he would retain something as miniscule as her rent strike.

"Course I did," he said. "Proudest moment of my life, watching my little girl go out there and make a difference in the world. But I was asking something." He turned back to Nova. "These symbols all over the walls...What are they?" He lifted a sheet of paper before letting it fall onto the pile again. "They're all over these as well."

"No one knows," Nova said. "Code breakers from the world over have come to try to decipher them."

"There are whole message boards about them online," Ginger said. "Some people think they're the work of aliens."

"And the rest?" the Doctor asked. "What do they think?"

"I mean it's typical human nonsense, isn't it? Can't hack it, assume it's the work of the devil."

"Trust me, we'd know if it was that," he said. 

"You forgot the least popular theory," Nova said. "People just want to assume the symbols mean something that they can crack, but a lot of us just think they're nonsense. I mean Mr. Moorhouse was a madman, so who's to say these aren't just the doodles of a madman? Personally, I just think he was crazy."

"Well that's no fun," the Doctor said. "No, crazy isn't fun at all! Crazy is a word used by humans to describe anyone acting in a way that they don't understand. Crazy always has a reason. Sometimes it really is psychological, which isn't bad in and of itself when we can manage it, but just writing something off as crazy never helped anyone. There's always an explanation if you're willing to find it..." He started digging through the paperwork again. "There's something familiar about the symbols, but I can't put my finger on it."

"What do you think, Ginger?" Cupid asked.

She'd just bitten into her pizza so had to take a moment to swallow before she could answer. "I dunno," she admitted. "They don't look familiar to me."

"If you don't mind, I'd like to take a look," Cupid said. 

"Have at it," the Doctor said. "There are repeating symbols, which makes me think it _is_ some sort of language. But none of the symbols look even remotely like any language family I'm familiar with."

"Yet you find them familiar," Cupid said.

"That's the troubling bit," he agreed.

"I'll take a look," Cupid assured him. "I'm incredibly proficient at languages."

Nova decided to change the subject. "Who wants to watch something while we eat? It's still not even 2 o clock. Hauntings don't typically start til closer to midnight, so we've got time."

"I could go for some TV," Ginger said. "I used to write reviews for a magazine."

"No really?" Nova asked. "That's so cool!"

"Used to?" the Doctor asked. "You don't anymore?"

She glared at him. "I'm recently unemployed."

"So what are we all in the mood for?" Nova asked. "Something light to take our minds off it?"

"That's the last thing we should do," Ginger said. "People are more likely to see ghosts if they've just been watching something paranormal. It's a whole psychology thing. We've got to trick our minds into being susceptible."

"What should we watch then?" Nova asked. "Paranormal Activity?"

Ginger scoffed. "Lame."

"The Others?"

"Seen it recently," Alex said.

"Oh I know!" Nova said. "Have you guys seen Haunting of Hill House yet?"

"I heard that one was good," Ginger said. "Did you guys see it?"

Everyone shook their heads except the Doctor and Jack.

"That's a brilliant one," the Doctor said. "I've always said Ginger would love that."

"She would," Jack agreed.

"It's really good," Nova said. "Especially if you've got a fucked-up relationship with your parents."

"So universally relatable," Ginger said.

"It's a real psychological horror thing," Nova said. "You'll love it..."

She turned it on.

...

The Doctor normally wasn't satisfied these days to sit around doing nothing, so he'd originally intended to just let the series play in the background while he tried to decipher the code on the papers. Instead, he found himself getting sucked into the story against his will. He glanced at Ginger from time to time to see how she was handling it, since it was a story all about personal traumas. She was incredibly engrossed in it, even shedding a few tears.

"Can I ask you something?" the Doctor whispered.

"Best not," Cupid said softly. "Don't want to disturb the other audience members."

"I've been wrong before," he pressed on. "I can misread things. How will I know when she's ready to forgive me?"

He closed his eyes and smiled gently. "If you really want to know, there's this thing Gingers do. It's unconscious, I doubt they know they're doing it. Whenever they're confused or frightened or protective or even just waiting for a cue or reassurance or approval, their body language and gaze will gravitate right toward their Doctor. It doesn't matter what's been happening with them, it's just instinct. But she has to recognize you as her Doctor for that to happen. She tends to avoid looking at every other person in the universe."

"Like she is with me now."

"Precisely."

Alex felt the most awkward during Theo's sex scenes. She found herself occasionally glancing at Nova. She still couldn't be sure that Nova had been coming on to her. It had felt like she was, but the longer this went on, the more she was able to convince herself that she hadn't been.

And suddenly, it was 11 o'clock at night.

"We really sat there all day," Nova said as she stretched.

"That was a really good ending," Ginger said. "Spectacularly fucked up."

"The book is very different."

"There's a _book_?"

"I liked Theo," Alex said.

"We know you did," Jack teased.

"Shut up. I just meant I relate to her, is all."

"Me too," Ginger said. "I think I related the most to her and Nell."

"Well that's not worrying," the Doctor said.

"The haunting should begin soon," Nova said, consulting the ornate clock on the wall. "It always starts this time a day, like clockwork. Different manifestations happen in different rooms. Do we all want to split up initially then come back together with our findings?"

"Sounds good," Alex said.

...

"Nova," the Doctor said. "Can I ask what's the deal with this box-like room on the top?" He gestured to a structure on the front cover of the map. "It's in all the pictures, but it doesn't show up on the map or floorplans."

"Ah," Nova said. "Yeah, that's the big mystery. No one's ever been able to get in that room."

"What? Not once in a hundred and twenty-one years?"

"Not once," she said. "Nobody can find the way in. There has to be a way in, we know that, but no one has ever found it. And the dome is unscaleable."

"Can't you just have someone airdrop you in?" Jack asked. "Maybe with a parachute?"

"Nobody can find a way in," she said. "Nobody knows what's up there. That was the main mystery my dad was trying to crack."

"And did he?" the Doctor asked.

"Never," she said.

Ginger could sense what he was thinking. "Don't even think about it," she muttered. "We're ghost hunters, we solve the mystery. That's cheating."

"Spoil my fun," he protested under his breath.

"Yeah that would be fun for all of thirty seconds before you'd be bored again. At least this keeps you occupied. If we find a way into this Red Room, we're doing it the old fashioned way."

"Red Room," the Doctor said. "Picking up the references already."

"It's a good show," she said. "It was worth picking up some vocabulary."


	14. O'Sailor

Alex Mitchell didn't last long in her room because the masks kept staring at her.

 _They're not staring at you, moron,_ she reasoned. _They don't even have eyes._

Somehow that made it worse.

Jack caught her as she left her room. "Where are you heading?"

"Nowhere," she said defensively. "Wow, creep much?"

He smirked. "Been waiting for you to try to sneak off. You've been very red-faced and shy almost since the moment we got here."

"I have not!" she protested. "I've just been, y'know, processing."

"Right," he nodded. "Processing the pretty girl who's been giving you all the attention."

"I don't even think of her that way," she lied.

"Right," Jack said. "Sure you don't. Well, if there's nothing you want to talk about-" He started to turn away.

"Well actually," she said. "Now you mention it. How do you tell if a girl likes you?"

He turned back to her. "You've dated a few of them yourself and you still don't know?"

"I still don't have a firm grasp," she admitted. "It's all so complicated and I'm never sure if I read too much into it. Like if a girl tells you what bedroom she's gonna be in 'in case yours gets too creepy', I mean she's just being nice, right?"

"Nova said that?" Jack asked.

"Sort of, yeah," Alex said. "But I'm reading too much into it-"

"Yeah, I don't think you are," he said. "Actually think it's a bold move to make a pass with your family staying right down the hall."

"Make a pass?" she repeated. "No no, she wasn't-"

"Yeah she was and you know it." He put a hand on her shoulder. "Just be safe, will you?"

She made a face. "Ew. Nothing's gonna happen, Jack. We're not talking about this."

He put his hands in the air. "You started it. I'm gonna go back to my room now, see what I can find out. But you should feel free to explore whatever it is that you want to...explore."

"I won't be exploring nothin'!" she protested as he walked away. "I'm good not exploring actually!"

...

The Doctor traced his fingers along the curious characters on his wall. He knew that languages had to have a certain order to them in order to be broadly readable. English was read left to right, Chinese was read top to bottom and right to left, Gallifreyan was read bottom to top in a counterclockwise circle...There must be an order to this. 

He followed the unfamiliar shapes along the wall, noticing that they curved and tapered at a point around a blueprint of the house. He figured that this meant the blueprint was of particular importance. He peered at it for a moment, fixing it to memory, before deciding to follow the words outward instead. Perhaps they themselves were a map and would lead him somewhere, whether he understood them or not. 

The traced his fingers along the shapes as he followed them along the hallway without regard for where he was going. He stopped short just outside Cupid and Thea's room. They were standing outside the room, except they weren't. They were clearly holographic projections of light.

"Thea!" the Doctor called.

The projection turned and looked right at him. "Doctor," she said brightly. "How are you doing that?"

"Doing what?" he asked. "I should be asking you that question."

Cupid turned as well. "Good lord," he said. "You startled me. Doctor, how did you manage to project yourself in here?"

"I didn't," he said. "You two are out here."

"We most certainly are not," Cupid said.

"Hold on," the Doctor said. He scanned the projections with the sonic and moved slowly toward them. They disappeared when he reached the glass partition between Cupid's side and Thea's side.

"Interesting effect," Thea said. "I'd THEA-rize that it's an illusion caused by light being filtered through this sort of prism that separates our two sides of the room."

"But why?" the Doctor said. 

"Interesting note about the décor," Cupid said. "It all matches exactly, but is inverted. Almost as a mirror effect. I'd expect it has something to do with that."

...

Sarah Jane was down in the dark room looking through the old photographs. 

"What are you looking at?"

Sarah Jane jumped as she realized she wasn't alone. "Ginger," she said. "What are you doing down here?"

Ginger shrugged. "The sound of the ticking in my room was driving me a bit mad. Alex said there was a dark room down here?"

Sarah Jane held up some photographs. "Would you like to take a look?"

"I'd love to," she said as she crossed the room.

Ginger peered at the photographs while Sarah Jane peered at her. "How are you holding up, dear?" she asked kindly.

"What?" she said distractedly. "Oh. Fine, just fine."

"Are you really?" she said. "Because a few hours ago you wouldn't get out of bed, but now you're up and moving about."

"My moods come and go," she said vaguely.

"Have you had a chance to talk to the Doctor yet?"

"What for?"

"Well, I know he has a lot to make up for, but I thought maybe you owed him an apology."

Ginger glared at her. "An apology? For what?"

But Sarah Jane wouldn't back down. "Because you owe him one. He's been trying to make it up to you, and you won't let him. You keep punishing him. That's getting you nowhere."

"I don't know what you mean."

"You do. It's alright. I know what you're going through."

Ginger scoffed. "Is that right?"

"Maybe not completely, but as much as anyone can. I was one of the girls the Doctor left behind, you know."

"What's your point?"

"My point is that the Doctor left me for decades, but that doesn't mean I hold it against him. He's still the same person at heart, and he never really stops caring for us. You can't keep punishing him because he's not who you want him to be. It's not fair to him. It's selfish. Because he's still that person. He just looks a bit different. You need to give yourselves time to get used to each other."

"I'll take it under advisement," Ginger said noncommittally. She looked down at some of the old photographs and frowned.

"What?" Sarah Jane asked. "What do you see?"

"These are really old," Ginger said.

"They are," she agreed. "They're yellow and fading."

"Yeah, but not as much as they should be." She raised her voice. "Cupid!"

...

"Hold that thought," Cupid said. "Ginger's calling."

"You can hear her?" the Doctor asked.

"It's more a general sense that she's looking for me specifically," Cupid said. "I'm very attuned to that particular wavelength. Back in a tick."

He disappeared."

...

Cupid appeared in front of Ginger. "You called?"

She held out some photographs. "Look at these pictures and see if you can spot what's wrong."

The pictures were all of the house, though some of them starred a young woman with dark hair. Cupid flipped through them. "I'm not sure," he admitted.

"Try again," Ginger said. "Think. You taught me all about the history of photography, so you know this. They're old."

"Yes, they would be," he said. "They're a century and a half old..." Then it dawned on him. "Oh. Yes _of course._ "

She nodded, her face splitting into a smug grin. "Now you're getting it."

"But how?"

"That's what I'd like to find out."

"Sorry, am I missing something?" Sarah Jane asked. "How what?"

"Old celluloid film from this era degrades so rapidly," Cupid said. "There's no way these prints could have survived to the modern day with only the minimum of light damage." He snapped his fingers. "Unless these aren't printed on celluloid."

"What else could they be printed on?" Ginger asked.

"We should take one to the Doctor," he said. "He'll be able to do a scan and tell us for sure. But whatever they're using, it must be terribly advanced for late Victorian Era photography."

Cupid took her arm and teleported them upstairs.

"I'll just stay here then," Sarah Jane called after them. "You follow that clue, I'll keep seeing if I can piece anything together down here."

She went through the photographs, finding a common theme in a majority of them.

"Who is she?" Sarah Jane asked, tapping a finger against one of the photos. Her hands shook a little bit, so she dropped the stack of photos she was holding. She sighed. That was happening more and more these days. She got to her knees to pick them up.

Once she was down there, she felt a slight draft. That was odd, considering that the room appeared airtight. She crawled to the wall to locate it. It seemed to be coming from the wall. She placed a hand against it and found a small, removable panel that blended seamlessly with the wall. Once removed, a stack of photographs fell from inside the wall like a small avalanche. She picked up one of them and brushed away a layer of dust that was coating it. These hadn't been developed yet, so she couldn't see what was on them. She wondered if they even could be developed. She knew someone she could ask.

...

Luke Smith had just gone to bed when his phone rang.

"Mum?" he said blearily. "What is it?"

"Sorry," she said. "Is this a bad time?"

"No, I was just trying to sleep," he said. "What's up?"

"You took that photography course, didn't you?" she asked.

"I did."

"I'm in a dark room in a supposedly haunted house and I found a lot of negatives that haven't been developed yet."

"And you're curious what's on them?"

"Precisely. Think you can help?"

He glanced at the clock. Nearly midnight. "I can walk you through it."

...

"Wow," Ginger said when she observed the holographic effects of the mirror. "Trippy."

"Our best theory so far is-" the Doctor began.

"Sort of a more complex Pepper's Ghost illusion, yeah I get it," she said. 

"In the trade, we normally use a few standard mirrors and a projector," Cupid observed. "But this partition appears to create the exact same effect."

"It's your basic Scooby Doo illusion," Ginger said. "The mirrors of this prism thing are essentially an optical beam splitter."

The Doctor tried not to show his annoyance. He glanced at the walls. "There are more of those symbols on the wall," he observed. "I followed them here, but I think they must stretch somewhere else."

Ginger considered this. "They're sort of tentacle-shaped, aren't they?"

He squinted at them. "Huh. I guess they are. I hadn't thought of that before."

"Tentacle-shaped?" Cupid repeated as something clicked with him. "Oh dear..."

"What?" Ginger pressed. "What is it you're not saying?"

"Nothing, nothing," Cupid smiled. "Rest assured that I'll tell you when there's anything you need to know. Would any of you mind if I went to make a phone call?" He excused himself from the room.

"Okay that was weird," Ginger said. "Did anyone else think that was weird?"

"No weirder than usual," the Doctor said.

"Still," Ginger replied. "He seemed a bit...I dunno..."

"Maybe we should work on deciphering these symbols," Thea said brightly. "Why don't each of us take a tentacle and see if there's any commonality we can find?"

...

Nearly 15 minutes later, Sarah Jane was standing over some newly developed film. 

"Did it work?" Luke asked.

"I think it did," she said. "I'm definitely seeing images. Thank you. Love you."

"Love you too-" he said, but was hung up on before he could get another word out.

Sarah Jane poured over the images, expecting more photographs of the young woman. But she wasn't in these. These photographs were of groups of people she'd never seen before, from all walks of life. It seemed that every era of the last hundred an twenty years was represented in these photos. They all seemed to be standing in the same room, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

Then it clicked.

...

Sarah Jane took a stack of the photographs to Jack's room.

"It's definitely this room alright," he said as he rifled through them. "You said you found these in the wall?"

"There was a chute," she explained. "In the wall. I think it leads to this room somehow."

Jack gestured broadly. "Look around. It's solid wall-to-wall mirrors. Where would a chute be hiding?"

"The more pressing concern is where is the camera hiding?" Sarah Jane asked.

"You think there's one still in here?" he asked. "I lived through the Victorian Era and they didn't have anything that could photograph without an operator."

"Well clearly there is," she said.

"How do you figure?"

"Keep flipping."

He flipped appreciatively through the photographs, marveling especially at the chosen fashion of the 70s. Then he stopped.

"Have you ever been here before?" Sarah Jane asked.

"Never," he said.

"So my suspicions are confirmed," she said. "Something in this room is still taking photographs."

The picture in Jack's hands was undeniably him. "There are others like this?"

She nodded. "In various poses. You've been looking around a lot. The cameras picked you up from different angles."

"Interesting," he said. "Something in here takes automatic pictures and somehow has unlimited film to keep doing this for over a hundred years."

"That was my thought too."

...

Alex followed her map to the master bedroom and found the door was open. Nova looked up when she heard the floorboard creak, and her face was wet with tears.

"Oh sorry," Alex said. "I can come back if this is a bad time."

"No it's fine," Nova said, hastily wiping away her tears and smiling. "It's just fine. I was just finishing going through my dad's stuff. He didn't have a lot of it here, it was mostly all at the other properties."

"You alright?" Alex asked.

"Yeah, yeah I'm good," Nova lied. "Dad was a dick. I dunno, it was complicated."

"It usually is."

"No but I mean it was _complicated._ The guy basically froze me out my whole life, but I was his sole heir so I got all his stuff now. Funny, that. Mum would just say to take it. 'Take the life you'd want', she'd say."

"Where is your mum?"

"She died."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"It was a long time ago. Just before we moved in here, actually. I used to think I'd see her sometimes at night...I dunno, I was a kid. Kids think mad things."

"Sometimes kids see things that adults aren't willing to."

She sniffled. "Yeah. You haven't said it yet, you know."

"Said what?"

"'Oh he's your dad? You look nothing like him!' Everyone says it."

"Family's complicated. I should know."

"I just know everyone thinks it when they find out. I mean he's white as the driven snow and then I'm just...He didn't love my mum. She was his maid. He got her pregnant, so he married her. That's what rich people do. She barely knew English at the time."

"Where was she from?" 

"Sudan. Anyway, dad wasn't around much. Kind of just left her to her own devices. She chose to use that to our advantage. We had his money, but none of the trouble of seeing him. But after she died, he had to take custody of me. And if I thought he was going to be any better to me after that...Well, let's just say you can live in a house with someone and still feel completely alone." She took a breath. "Anyway, I went to trade school as soon as I turned 16. Mum was always adamant that I know how to take care of myself, that I not become one of those rich girls who can't care for themselves. Dad hated that. Said I was a disappointment if I wasn't going to go on and do something 'important' with my life. As if learning how to take care of myself and others isn't 'important'. Anyway, we hadn't talked for years when he died."

"And you're regretting that now?"

"No," she said. "Is that horrible? But at the same time, I'm sad that our relationship hadn't meant more, you know? That I couldn't have just a normal dad."

"Yeah, that makes sense. If it helps, most dads I know have been terrible. It seems to be the universal experience, having an absent father."

"Yeah, I've noticed that a bit," Nova said.

Alex's phone buzzed in her pocket. 

"What is it?" Nova asked.

Alex read the text. "Mum wants us down in the dark room. Says she has something to show us."

...

"I've never seen these pictures before," Nova said. "And I've seen all the pictures."

"I don't think anyone knew that chute was there," Sarah Jane said. "So it's not as though they appeared from thin air. They were just hidden."

"I recognize some of these people," Nova said. "Just from press about the house. Some of these are famous ghost hunters...Hold on." She held up a photo. "That's my dad."

Alex peered at the photo. "That's him alright. Was he just permanently frowning or?"

Nova was looking at the other new photos. "Some of these are of me as well," she said. She held up some photos of a brown-skinned teenage girl. "This is so creepy. I was being watched the whole time?"

"Likely only when you're in that room," Sarah Jane said. 

"That's the one Jack's in, right?" Alex asked. "The one with all the mirrors?"

"Which brings us to our next point," Sarah Jane replied. She pressed a button on her phone, activating the video chat function. "Are you in place?"

"Just about ready," Jack smiled. 

"Jack's going to go back into the room," Sarah Jane explained. "We're going to see if the pictures are taken again in real time. Alright, Jack. Whenever you're ready."

Jack took a few steps into his room. "Anything yet?"

"Nothing," Sarah Jane said. "Keep moving around. Act natural."

"I've been meaning to ask," Jack said. "This is supposed to be a bedroom. There's no chance that you found any pictures that maybe people didn't want you to see."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Don't answer that," Alex groaned.

Just then, a picture slid down the chute.

"Wait, we've got something," Alex said. She picked up the picture. 

"It won't look like anything yet," Sarah Jane said. "We'll have to develop it. I'll get on that."

Another photo slid down the chute.

"Whatever you're doing is working," Sarah Jane said. "Keep poking around, do more of that."

"That's what she said," said a voice.

"Ginger?" Alex said. "You're on this call too?"

"Yeah, I can't resist a mystery," Ginger said. She hadn't activated the video feature, she was just a voice on the line.

"I'm coming up," Alex said. "I want to see if I can help."

"I'll come with you," said Nova.

Nova was startled by the ghostly figures of Thea, Cupid, and the Doctor as they arrived at the room. Alex wasn't bothered though. There was something off about it that she couldn't put her finger on yet.

"How are you doing that?" asked Nova.

"Don't be afraid," the Doctor said. "It's a tricky bit of magic, really."

Ginger sighed. "It's your basic Pepper's Ghost illusion."

"Your basic what?" Alex asked.

"Basically it's all mirrors reflecting light back a certain way," Ginger explained.

"This is why you don't date a techie," the Doctor muttered. "They take all the magic out of everything."

Ginger glared at him. "What was that?"

"Nothing, nothing," he said.

Thea expelled a photograph from her mouth like it was being shot out of a printer. "Analysis complete!" she announced. 

"She just shot a photograph out of her mouth!" Nova said. "Did everyone just see that?"

"Right, Thea's sort of an android," Alex said. "Forgot to mention."

"What did you find, Thea?" the Doctor asked.

"These photographs are not made using any Earth process," Thea said. "They're closer to the photographic methods employed by the Poldrovars."

"Of course," he said. "All you'd have to do is build a machine capable of harvesting the loose oxygen and nitrogen in the air then assemble to molecules into a colorful shape. It also explains the lack of degradation."

"Precisely," she smiled. "Shall we go see if we can locate the source of these photographs?"

...

They made their way along the corridor in mostly silence.

"Nova," Ginger said. "Would you mind refreshing my memory a bit?"

"Sure," Nova replied. "What about?"

"The history of this house," she replied. "I'm trying to make it all add up. It just feels like there's something I'm forgetting. What sort of haunting is there here?"

"Well," Nova replied. "The most common apparition to appear here is the ghost of Mrs. Moorhouse. According to historical documents, she actually died several months before her husband. According to the legend, he died in Cardiff on a routine supply run in some sort of carriage accident, but Mrs. Moorhouse still roams these halls waiting for him to come home."

"Is there any truth to that rumor?" Ginger asked.

"Definitely," Nova said. "I've seen her myself. That and other things. She's quite sad, really. Doesn't seem to know what's going on."

They reached Jack's room to find him still posing for the camera while Sarah Jane waited on the other side of the phone.

"It's not taking a photo every time you move," Sarah Jane said. "Which means there must be some sort of motion sensor."

"Or a weight sensor," Jack agreed. "I'm going to move and you tell me when it takes a picture."

A few seconds passed with him moving around the room.

"There," Sarah Jane said.

He paused. "Alright, I'm going to step on this part of the floor again, tell me if it takes another picture."

"It did," Sarah Jane replied.

"Interesting," Thea said. "I am seeing stress patterns in pockets around the room. Jack, if you could step 4 centimeters to your right."

"Anything you say," he replied. He took her advice.

"It did it again," Sarah Jane replied instantly. "Pressure sensors do seem to be the most likely theory."

"But what's taking the pictures?" Ginger asked. "That's what I wanna know."

"I'll activate my x-ray sensors," Thea said. "That should tell us if there's anything hidden behind the mirrors."

"Wait hold on," Nova said. " _X-ray sensors?"_

"Interesting," Thea said.

"What is it?"

"I can't see anything beyond the walls," she announced brightly. "I need to do an analysis of the building materials used."

"How long will that take?" Alex asked.

"Not long," she replied. She exited the room and found an exposed patch of brick. She licked it.

"Thea, _gross_ ," Ginger said. She glared at the Doctor. "You trained her to do that, didn't you?"

"What?" he said. "It's a perfectly acceptable way to analyze a sample!"

"This isn't brick," Thea said. "It's a substance disguising itself as brick." She licked a wooden molding. "As is this. It's the same substance, just painted like wood. I imagine this entire house is built of this, which is why my x-ray vision can't see through it."

"What kind of substance?" Nova asked.

"Are you saying it's alien?" asked Jack.

"It must be," agreed Thea. "But I can't properly identify the substance. It is not known to my database. It is easily moldable, but once affixed in a shape it is virtually immovable except by design. It has some chemical structures I can identify - hydrogen, silicone, osmium - but others are not found in this universe."

"That's impossible," the Doctor said.

"Osmium?" Ginger repeated. "That's one of the heaviest elements, isn't it?"

"That's right," the Doctor said. "Maybe that explains at least partially why the walls are so thick. Good catch."

"Oh I wasn't thinking that at all," Ginger said. "I just remember it on Fringe. Remember, when the universe was breaking down so they were able to use osmium to become lighter than air?"

The Doctor nodded. "I'd forgotten, but I suppose it's as good a reason to retain the information as any."

"I'm almost certain there's going to be a camera apparatus behind those walls," Thea said. "Possibly several. But it's going to be nearly impossible to get through there."

"What if I climb up the chute?" Alex asked. "I'm really small, I can probably fit."

"I don't want you getting trapped back there, Alex," Sarah Jane said.

"If I get trapped, Thea can teleport in and get me," Alex pointed out.

"Teleport?" Nova asked. "Blimey, is there anything you _can't_ do?"

"I think we should split into groups," Thea said. "Some of us up here and some in the dark room. Just to accurately monitor the situation."

"Right," Jack said. "Unless there are any objections, Nova and I will go with Alex. The Doctor, Thea, and Ginger can stay up here."

"What?" Ginger asked. "Why am I in this group?"

"Do you have a reason why you shouldn't be?" Jack asked.

She tried very hard to think of one, but couldn't. "Fine," she sighed. "I'll be up here."

The groups split apart once more and there was an awkward silence while they waited.

"Actually," Ginger said. "Does anyone object to me continuing to investigate this weird language on the walls? I figure if I follow a tentacle I can find a source."

"I think that's a great idea," Thea said. "I'll call you back if we find anything."

"Mind if I come with you?" the Doctor asked.

Ginger eyed him suspiciously. "Better not," she said slowly. "I mean, you can trace a tentacle if you want. But _not_ the one I'm working on."

He had a theory that they might meet in the middle, so he accepted this proposition. "Alright, I'll just take this one, then."

...

Alex crouched in front of the chute.

"It'll be a bit of a tight squeeze," Sarah Jane said. "I don't like the thought of you getting stuck."

"I can manage," she said. "I just hope there aren't any spiders or rats up there."

"Why?" Nova teased. "Big strong butch Alex isn't scared of a little thing like a spider, is she?"

"Big strong butch Alex isn't a thing," Alex said. "I may not be high femme, but I'm not exactly the archetypical butch either. I don't think I really neatly fit any aesthetic."

"Who does?" Nova said. "I mean I come off high femme some days, but I can build things and fix the plumbing. We contain multitudes."

"That's all very nice," Alex said. "But it's not gonna help me if there's a spider up there."

"There's still a chance to back out," Nova said. "No one is making you do this."

"No I'll do it, I'll do it," Alex said. "Just gimme a sec to scope out the size of this hole." She cast a warning look at Jack. "Don't start."

"I wasn't going to say anything," he said innocently.

Alex leaned into the opening and looked up. 

"What do you see?" asked the Doctor.

"Nothing," she said. "It's completely dark."

"Here," Jack said, handing a cylindrical object over to her. "Take a flashlight."

"Thanks," she said. She shone it up into the chute. "The good news is that I think you're right, and it goes straight into the mirror room. So it won't be that far of a climb." She put the torch into her mouth and braced her hands and feet on the chute to begin her slow climb.

"Funny how she just sort of instinctively knew how to climb," Sarah Jane remarked.

"That's not instinct," Jack said. "That's Torchwood training. I drilled her for years on how to get out of any situation. I guess it would be instinct by now."

...

Ginger followed the string of symbols along the corridor. She was passing by a door when she distracted by something inside it. This room wasn't a bedroom, it was some sort of sunporch. The room was made of multicolored stained glass that was shaped like a prism that formed a star-shaped skylight on top. Directly below the skylight was a beautiful antique piano.

"Hello, beautiful," Ginger breathed. She moved toward it.

Before she could reach it, she was startled by the appearance of a young woman sitting at the piano. She was translucent and dark haired and was wearing an old-fashioned high-necked white dress. She turned her whole body in Ginger's direction as if startled. "Hello?" she said. "Who's there?"

Ginger was in shock. This was a ghost. A _real live ghost._

"I could ask the same of you," she said.

The ghost stood up and smoothed down her dress. "You're not my husband," she said. "Who are you? What are you doing in my house?"

Ginger realized who this must be. "Listen, I don't know how to tell you this-"

"Are you another ghost?"

Ginger blinked. "No, I'm not a ghost. _You're_ a ghost."

"Am not!" she protested. "You're just trying to confuse me! I'm not insane, alright! I'm better now and you can't fool me!"

Ginger didn't know what she was supposed to do. "Look, can you stay right here for a minute? I'll be right back-"

The ghost's mood suddenly shifted and the whole room went cold. "No don't leave me. Please. It's so lonely in this house. I fear I'll go mad if I have to be alone anymore. You just have to stay til my husband gets home. When he gets home, you can leave."

Ginger felt profoundly sorry for this poor, confused ghost. "I'm not leaving," she assured her. "I'm just going to get the Doctor. He'll sort this out-"

The ghost's mood shifted again to sudden anger. The room warmed at once. " _Doctor?_ I told you I don't _need_ a doctor! I'm not sick anymore, I'm perfectly well!" She put a hand up to her face and shifted her weight as if overcome with emotion. "I'm better now..." she said in a softer, more plaintive tone. "I'm not sick anymore, I'm better now." 

"Are you alright?" Ginger asked. It was a perfectly ridiculous question to ask of a ghost, but she couldn't help it. She felt an involuntary empathy for this soul.

The spirit looked at her with mournful eyes. "Please would you tell me what time my husband gets home? I've checked on all the clocks, but I can't seem to find the time..."

The spirit gazed sorrowfully at an ornate clock on the wall that was engraved with musical notes. Ginger followed this gaze.

"These clocks are for you?" Ginger asked. "So you can keep time?"

"It keeps slipping through my grasp," she admitted tearfully. "He told to me to check the clocks, but I find nothing but the metronome of my own heart."

"I..." Ginger swallowed hard. "I'm going to go get help, alright?"

Her frustration returned. "I told you, I don't-"

"Need help," Ginger said. "Yeah, I know that song well. I just need a second opinion, alright? Can you stay right here?"

"Don't leave me," she said. "Please. I don't want to be alone anymore. That's all I am, eternally alone."

"I promise I won't be long," Ginger said. She put up a hand in a placating gesture. "Just stay right here, will you? Please?"

She stepped out of the room and tried very hard to keep her composure. She'd found that entire experience much more harrowing than she'd expected. But more than that...Something about that was _wrong._ She felt it on a gut level. 

"Ginger?"

Ginger jumped. "Cupid," she said. "You scared me."

"That's hard to do," Cupid said. "What's got you so rattled?"

"Nothing," she lied. "Just..."

"You look like you've seen a ghost," he said. "More than one today, by the looks of it."

She couldn't keep the truth from him. "There's something in there," she said, nodding to the doorway. "In the music room. She's so sad. But she's not real."

"You can feel that she's not real?"

"Not exactly?" Ginger admitted. "I'm all turned around and confused. Usually I just know when things are wrong. Like the first time I met Jack or those things I remember...It's not important."

"On the contrary," Cupid said. "It's very important. You have a very strong intuitive sense of the laws of nature. It's inherent in our kind. You're stubborn, so you're not easily swayed even when others have no recollection. Ginger, it's very important...This woman you saw. Is she real?"

Ginger hesitated. "I don't know? She feels real but not real? Like there's something I'm missing, I just..." She put her face in her hands.

"Another migraine, pumpkin?"

"I can feel one coming on," she admitted. "Not as bad as the ones I used to get. That infernal drumming has stopped, at least. Can you do something for me?"

"Anything you like."

"Look in the room and tell me if she's there. If you can't see her, I'll believe she's not real."

"A reality check," he said. "I can do that." He didn't want to tell her yet that even if he saw it, it wouldn't be confirmation that it was real. Not in the way she was thinking, anyway. He was relieved to find nothing there, but only for a moment before the real worry kicked in. "There's no one there, petal. I think we should sit."

She nodded and let him lead her into the music room to a sofa situated directly in front of the piano.

He crouched in front of her. "Tell me what happened. Take your time."

"I was fine," she said. "I was better." She took a shuddering breath. "Which is how I know that can't be real because she was speaking too much like stuff that goes on inside my head. I just conjured up some sort of psychological manifestation."

He nodded. "That's the most likely explanation. There's a sort of condition in our species that comes from uncontrollable emotion. A Ginger a long time ago called it 'leaking'."

"Leaking?"

"Gingers are the most prone to it, probably by design. This was always a worry. Cora warned me that getting you out alive was only half of the battle. If I somehow managed it, I'd have to contend with the fact that the Trickster likely designed your instability to cause a leak as a safeguard in case we succeeded."

"How bad is it?"

"I'm not sure. It can vary in degrees and be catastrophic, but it always starts with a low-grade brain fever and hallucinations that become manifest. If they get to the point where others can see them, that's when we need to start worrying. Because I'm sorry, but you were not better. You were for a while, but if you think you've been better today just because you got out of bed, then you don't understand yourself as well as you think you do. Your curiosity overrides everything else in your life, it always has. It's the only reason you've survived this long. You got out of bed because you wanted to see a ghost. But you can only distract yourself from your pain for so long."

"And now I have. Seen a ghost, I mean. How do I make it stop?"

"We can take preventative measures," he said, reaching into his pocket. "I didn't want it to have to come to this. What I have here is the only proven method of stopping a leak. Problem is that it tastes rotten."

She gestured at the bottle. "Give it here." She downed it in one go. "Eugh. You're right. That's awful."

"I'll get you something to wash it down with," he said, straightening up. 

"Don't leave me!" she said, alarmed.

"I won't be long," he said, gently. "Just try to stay off your feet. This stuff will knock you out and you don't want to be moving around when it hits."

Ginger wasn't capable of waiting for him to get back. She hated being alone with her thoughts with nothing to focus on. Cupid had said to stay seated. But she just couldn't do that.

She got to her feet and decided to try out the piano to kill time.

...

The Doctor ran into Cupid as he was on his way back to Jack's room. 

"I found it," the Doctor said. "There's a hub that is sort of shaped like an octopus. Where's Ginger? I thought she'd be there by now." He saw Cupid's face. "What?"

"She's not feeling very well," he said. "I gave her something to calm her down and I'm just going to get her a water-"

"I'm sorry you _gave_ her something?" the Doctor asked. "What did you give her this time? A loaded gun? The last time you gave her something to calm her down, it didn't turn out so well."

"And I take full responsibility," Cupid said. "But this is what I was trying to avoid. This is an ancient medication that works on our species. This is proven and will work if she's willing to let it."

The Doctor was suddenly overcome with worry. "You said she's not feeling well?"

Cupid sighed. "Don't go bothering her right now, she needs her rest-"

"Where is she?" the Doctor asked, ignoring this completely. He heard music filtering out from a nearby room. "Never mind."

"Doctor," Cupid protested. "Doctor, don't-"

But it was too late, the Doctor had already stepped inside. Ginger was slouched over the piano, her left arm resting against the fallboard and propping up her head as she let her right hand roam lazily across the keys.

"Ginger," the Doctor said. "How are you feeling?"

Ginger immediately straightened up her posture and glared at him, but it was clear she was unsteady and not clear headed. "Oh it's _you_. Didn't I already tell you to leave me alone?"

He knew that he wasn't likely to get through to her when she was like this. "You did. I thought you might want to know that I followed the tentacles to the source and they _do_ form a sort of octopus in the center-"

"Well yippee for you, then," Ginger said sarcastically. She made a face. "A phrase that I've never said before and never will again. Sorry, my head's not really on right..."

"I know," he said sympathetically. 

"Oh right right, you _know..."_ She looked away and went back to toying with the piano.

"If you've got something you want to say to me..." the Doctor began, knowing how her moods usually manifested.

She ignored him and began playing a old song from her teen years. She modified the pop punk song to a simple, mournful piano melody.

_"I heard you're doing okay_   
_But I want you to know_   
_I'm addic- I'm addicted to you_   
_I can't pretend I don't care_   
_When you don't think about me_   
_Do you think I deserve this?_   
_I tried to make you happy_   
_But you left anyway..."_

"We're still fighting about this?" the Doctor asked. "I've already said I'm sorry. And you know it didn't happen like that."

She glared at him for a second before looking away.

_"Since the day I met you_   
_And after all we've been through_   
_You're still a dick-"_

"Alright," he said, struggling to conceal his anger. "I've heard Alexia listen to this song enough times to know that's _not_ how this song goes!"

"Why are you even here?" she snapped. "This was supposed to be my free ghost hunting night. One night where I didn't have to think about you! But you go and ruin it by just being there all the time! Why do you have to ruin it?"

"I'm sorry that I ruin it," he said darkly. "Maybe if you could give me a specific example of me 'ruining it'-"

"I don't need your help, alright! Stop trying to fix me! You can't just be gone for months then try to play the big hero like nothing happened!" She started playing a totally different song.

_"And so you're back_   
_From outer space_   
_I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face_   
_I should have changed that stupid lock, I should have made you leave your key_   
_If I'd known for just one second you'd be back to bother me-"_

He was angry, but also hurt and concerned. "You're impossible to talk to when you're like this," he said as he turned to storm off.

Something about this made her furious.

_"Go on now, go, walk out the door_   
_Just turn around now_   
_'Cause you're not welcome anymore!"_

"Yeah, funny enough, I sort of got that," he said dryly.

She felt a weird irrational panic rise in her chest. She wanted him to leave her alone, but at the same time she didn't want him to actually go. But she knew whatever Cupid had given her had started to kick in. This meant she was in no shape to get up. Her vision was fuzzy and her limbs felt heavy, so she leaned against the piano again, resting her fevered head upon the cool wood while she played.

" _O'sailor, why'd you do it? Why'd you do that for?"_ she sang blearily, as she struggled against the current of her own emotions and the waves of exhaustion that were piling upon her. Tears of sorrow and frustration leaked from her eyes.

The Doctor froze slightly when he heard the song. Fiona Apple. He knew that Fiona Apple tapped into the real hurt that she was feeling. He regretted making her feel like that. Cupid put a gloved hand on his arm and shook his head. 

"Not now," he said. "Go monitor the situation with Alex. I'll get Ginger a glass of water and keep an eye on her. There's nothing you can do here."

He hesitated, then nodded. Cupid was probably right. He couldn't seem to do anything except make things worse with her.

The two of them left and Ginger continued to sing softly. She sang the same words over and over, because her exhaustion was stealing any other words she knew.

_"O'sailor, why'd you do it? Why'd you do that for?"_

"Even to this day, I'm not sure which one of us you were talking about with that line."

Ginger hadn't realized that she wasn't alone, but she didn't jump. The voice wasn't at all familiar - it seemed to belong to an old, Scottish man.

"Hello, Doctor," she whispered without turning around.

"Not surprised to see me?" he said.

"I haven't seen you," she said. "Besides, you're not real. You're a fever manifestation and I'm sure you've got something oh so important to tell me."

He started to correct her, but then decided she might be better off thinking that. "I think we need to get you lying down." A short pause. "Not going to contradict me? Or at least ask me if that's a line?"

"I know what you meant. I normally do."

"Look," he said, clearly realizing the awkwardness of the situation he'd gotten himself into. "You need to get yourself up so you can lie down, possibly on that nice sofa over there."

"Why?"

"I don't know. That's what people do - they have a lie down when they're not feeling well. Don't ask questions, just do it." She didn't move, she just kept lazily playing the piano. He sighed. "Alright, that's it. Up."

He grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her to her feet. "Oi!" she protested. "What's the big idea?"

He threw her unceremoniously onto the sofa. "And stay there! Don't even think about getting up til you're sorted."

Her limbs felt too heavy to fight it anyway. She tried to glare at him, but she couldn't get a fix on him - her glasses had fallen to the floor.

"If you manifested just to get me to have a lie down, then you did it," she said sullenly. "Great job. You can go away now."

"I'd love to, because you're impossible to speak to when you're like this," he said. "The two of us are like two brick walls shouting at each other. But I can take it. He can't."

"He who?"

"This me," he said. "Past me. The one you keep pushing away. He's trying very hard, you know, and you're not being at all fair to him. You need to be nicer to him."

She chuckled darkly. "Nicer? Alright, that sure sounds like me..."

"You need to try harder," he said. "You have no idea what he's been through because you won't let him tell you. He still wants to be a part of your life, so stop treating him like a complete stranger. You know it's hurting him, but you keep doing it anyway. It's not fair to him. Shout at me all you want, I can take it, but you need to stop pushing your Doctor away."

"He left me," she mumbled. 

"You know it wasn't his choice," he said. "It was something you both decided on. So stop punishing him. He's far too kind and concerned about your well-being to tell you off for the way you're treating him, but I won't make that mistake. You think he left you before? Imagine if you keep going like this, pushing him away, then he never comes back? How will you feel then? I know you think you're protecting yourself from feeling that pain again, but you can't even imagine what it would feel like to lose him for good."

"You're..." she said softly.

"Yes?" he pressed. 

"You're..."

"I'm what? Right? Brilliant? Incredibly dashing in a suit?"

"You're just a manifestation of my subconscious," she said. "I don't have to listen to you..."

She closed her eyes and he knew instantly that she'd fallen asleep.

"Right," the Doctor said. "I should've expected you would say that. It is, as Alex would say, 'on brand'. 'Iconic Ginger', she'd also say." He heard footsteps approaching and knew Cupid was about to find him there. He didn't want to risk being caught, so he slipped out through the side door into the garden.


	15. Melt With You

"So you see, I'm not really here," Ginger said. "I wish I was, but this is some kind of dream state brought on by whatever Cupid gave me."

"How long have you known?" asked the imaginary Doctor.

"I think always?" Ginger said. "Not consciously, because I wouldn't let myself know it. I wanted this to be real. I miss you so much that I created a world where nothing ever changed. It's always just after Roswell, before we found out how complicated things really were."

"So now you have to go back?"

"I don't want to," she admitted. "I'd much rather be here with you."

"But you have to."

"That's what he'd say, yeah."

"But I'm not him. I'm a collection of your memories of him. You fill me in with what you think he'd say, but somewhere, deep down, you want to go back. Because if I'm a figment of your imagination and you really didn't want to leave, you'd make me fight you. You'd make me beg you to stay. But instead, here we are. And here I am. I don't want you to die. There's a whole world out there and I would hate you to miss it because you're here with me. You have to wake up."

"I know," she said. "But not right away. The clock says that time's up, but I think we deserve a proper goodbye this time."

He smiled fondly at her. "I'll stop the world and melt with you?"

She smiled back. "That's the idea. Let's go somewhere we can talk."

"Where would you like to go?" he asked. "We can go anywhere you like. What about Roswell?"

She felt an almost unbearable aching in her chest. "I'd love nothing more than to go to Roswell. But I can't. Roswell was the happiest I've ever been. If I go there now, then the last memory I'll have of it will be sad. I can't destroy it like that, even if it's imaginary."

"Fair enough," he said. "So where to?"

...

The Doctor was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Ginger crawled in next to him and lay on her side looking at him. He turned his head to smile at her. She couldn't help but smile back.

"So when did you know consciously?" he asked. "You never said."

"It hit me all at once," she said. "I was so desperate to know that you love me."

"But I do love you."

"I know. At least, I think I do. It was just overwhelming. I wanted you so badly. I needed things to be okay again. It must be how it feels for an addict to get their fix. I needed it so badly. It felt so good and I needed it to never end. Then I saw Cupid's pocket watch and knew that it was trying to tell me that it was nearly time to wake up. It broke my heart."

"Well at least you have an extra one."

She shoved him playfully. "You know what I mean. I've missed you."

"But from what you've told me, I haven't gone anywhere. You're the one pushing me away. Classic Ginger, really. You're always so mean to me the first time we meet."

"I'm sorry about that. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"Yeah you do."

"Yeah. I do." She spent a moment studying his face. "You're perfect. Every detail, exactly as I remember it."

"But you know I'm not real."

"Exactly. It's the opposite problem I had with my real Doctor. I knew immediately that it was him. I felt it. He looked and sounded completely different, but it was him. But you...you feel so right. But I know deep down that you're wrong. You look and sound like him, but you're not him."

He rolled onto his side and stroked her hair tenderly. He kissed her slowly and she melted into it, pressing her hands to his face to keep him there. He held her so tightly. She felt safe. 

"I wish I could stay," she breathed.

"I wish you could too," he admitted. "But that's the good thing about dreams. You can always come back. I'll be here if you need me."

"I always need you."

"No you don't."

"But if I come back, will you remember any of this?"

"If you want me to. You control the narrative. You always did."

"I don't wanna go."

"I know. Can I ask you a question?"

She smiled. "We never used to do that. Could be risky."

"What are you so afraid of?"

"Nothing. I'm not afraid of anything."

"But that's not true, is it? You lash out from a place of fear. That's why you've been punishing the real Doctor. That's why you've created this whole world where I didn't know anything about you. So what is it you're scared of?"

"I'm afraid..." She swallowed hard. "I'm afraid that you don't like me anymore. That you can't. Not now that you know me. Everything changed. You feel differently about me. I guess that's why I'm so angry at you. It's like in the Good Place, you know? Eleanor says: 'I'm angry at him for leaving me. Which isn't even remotely fair because he sacrificed himself for us. But I'm still angry he abandoned me, which makes me feel guilty, which makes me angry, which makes me want to talk to him because he's the person I go to when I'm angry.'"

"You're upset because you think my feelings for you have changed?"

"That's right."

"You assume that's a bad thing? I love you, Ginger. Having context for it just gave me more of you to love. I don't think you can truly love someone without knowing them. Before that, you're just in love with an image that you can convince yourself is anything you want it to be. But that image isn't who they really are. I know watching the Good Place helped you process when I left. Would it help you accept this if I quoted it back for you now?"

She nodded. "Maybe with some modifications for context."

He smiled and gazed into her eyes. "'So, Ginger, here it is. I love you, completely and utterly, but you have to go."

"But I don't though," she said, voice cracking. "I don't have to go. I don't have to leave you."

"I don't want you to leave me, but you're ready to leave. So I have to let you go and you have to let me go."

"But if I let you go, I'll be alone. I was alone my whole life, and I told myself I like it that way, but I don't. I like being with you."

"You proposed a rule that Doctors shouldn't go because it makes Gingers sad, and I could do this forever, zip around the universe showing you cool stuff, and I'd still never find the justification for getting you to stay." He gazed at her steadily. "That should be your line."

"Because I'm the Arizona trashbag of this equation?"

"Yes, but also because that's essentially what you said to real me when you let him go. The zipping around the universe part is very obviously more of a me thing, but we both agreed to stop prioritizing our own short-term happiness over what's best for us and others in the long run. You knew we'd be sad without each other, but you let me go. You thought of every justification that every Doctor and Ginger have ever made to keep themselves together, but when you weighed the options you couldn't justify them. You had to do the right thing, even when it was hard."

"So what you're saying is...I owe it to you to let you go. Just one last time."

"Yes," he replied. "That's exactly what I'm saying."

She couldn't stop the tears that fell from her eyes as she kissed him once more. She could feel time running out.

She leaned her forehead against his.

"I love you," she said.

He smiled. "You love me? Then promise you'll do something for me."

"Anything."

"Tell me again when you're awake."


	16. Haunted

Ginger's eyes snapped open.

 _That was a really vivid dream,_ she mused. _Much more vivid than reality, actually..._

After the sharp colors of her dream, it was somewhat confusing that the world was still blurry. She was still groggy and disoriented, so it took her a moment to realize that the problem was that she didn't have her glasses on. She felt around on the sofa for them, becoming increasingly panicked the longer she went without finding them. She finally found them on the floor and felt relieved when they were secured on her face.

She suddenly became aware of panicked voices shouting from the hallway.

"You're right!" a voice said. "It's not just a map - it's a sequence!"

Ginger recognized that voice. _The Corsair? When did she get here? How long was I out?_

She raced to the corridor and looked around for the source of the voices. It was hard, because the passage twisted and turned. She needed to really focus.

A scream echoed through the halls.

"We need to get her out of there!" Sarah Jane said. "If this is a combination, we need to figure out how it works now!"

Ginger followed the voices and reached the group just outside of the room the room with all the papers that the Doctor had picked when they first arrived.

"What's happening?" she asked. "What did I miss?"

"You seem better," the Doctor said. This was more like her old self. No fear, only curiosity.

"I had some things to work out," she said. "I'm ready to focus now."

"That's great," said another familiar voice. "If we could _all_ focus, that would be better."

Ginger turned her attention to two people huddled on the floor over a stack of papers. "R.H.?" she said. "Corsair, what are you two doing here?"

"Cupid asked us for help," the Corsair said. "We're trying to-"

"We don't have time for this," R.H. snapped as she got to her feet. "We need her up to speed immediately. Are you gonna do it, or am I?"

Cupid caught her drift immediately. "No," he protested. "I absolutely forbid that. She's too fragile right now and she doesn't know how to process it yet."

"Process what?" Ginger asked.

"Don't tell me you haven't even gone _over_ the concept with her," R.H. said. "Blimey, she _is_ young. Besides, Cupid, I wasn't asking you. We both know you can't do it with your condition. I was asking Cora."

"And I don't think we really need to resort to that," the Corsair said. "We can fill her in after we've figured things out."

R.H. turned to Cupid. "You called me here for my help. Two Gingers are better than one. She's useless to me if she doesn't have all the information to work with. I'll just give her the last hour. That's all she needs anyway." She moved toward Ginger.

"What are you doing?" Ginger asked, instinctively moving back.

"I'm not asking you to trust me," R.H. said. "I'm asking you to respect the fact that this is our only choice." She grabbed Ginger's right wrist with her left hand and held the backs of their right hands together. "Hold it there." 

She dropped Ginger's wrist and Ginger didn't have time to do anything before images flooded into her mind. She felt the memories as if they were her own, though she instinctively knew they belonged to R.H. She could see it all so clearly.

...

Cupid had tracked R.H. down on a distant moon during her hunt for the Queen.

"I need you to come back to Earth," he said.

"Right," she scoffed. "Because that worked out so well last time."

"It may be important," he insisted. "If it's what I think it is."

The Corsair had returned at that moment. "We're too late again," she said obliviously. "She's shoved off...Oh hi, Cupid."

"I need help," he said. "I'm investigating a haunted house and I found something...Well, I'm not sure if it's anything."

"I know that look," she said. "That look of anxiety bordering on guilt. What is it you're not telling me?"

He hesitated. "I hoped you'd both come take a look. Obviously having a Ginger is an advantage."

"So why not ask yours?" asked R.H.

"She's still incapacitated," Cupid said, trying not to betray how furious he was at them. "But even if she wasn't, we need a Ginger who has more experience. I've purposely kept her out of this. If I have my way, she'll never have to know about any of this."

"Are you sure that's the right way to go?" R.H. asked. "Sheltering her may not be the right way to handle it. If this is as serious as you say, she deserves to be prepared."

"I'll tell her anything she needs to know when she needs to know it. But for now, I need you, R.H. But almost more importantly, I need Cora. She's the one with the real experience. She's been at this longer."

"What do you need?" the Corsair asked.

...

Cupid took them straight back to Turner Manor, bypassing the front door.

"Don't overreact," Cupid warned the Corsair. "It may be nothing."

"Overreact?" Cora scoffed. "What're you..." She suddenly noticed the weird pattern of symbols on the walls and moved toward them. She traced her fingers over a tentacle-shaped pattern then recoiled as if burned. "No fucking way. This isn't happening."

"R.H.?" Cupid said gently. "Do you recognize them at all?"

"A bit?" R.H. admitted. "I'm actually hoping that I'm not recognizing them."

"It's shaped like a tentacle," the Corsair said. "Every string of characters arranges itself like a coiling tentacle. Is there an octopus at the center?"

"I checked," he admitted. "And yes."

The Corsair backed away. "You told me she never made it here."

"I said I didn't think she had," Cupid said. "There's a difference. You know she was never very forthcoming about her adventures. There are whole gaps in the timeline that are unaccounted for. Besides, there's no definitive proof that this is her. You know that sometimes ideas occur simultaneously in different timelines."

"An idea like this?" Cora asked. "Don't try to make me feel better. Who else would have a complex, incomprehensible, hexagonal-based writing system that was meant to be read from stalk to terminal pad?"

He tried to think of a way to rationalize that. "I do have to admit, it doesn't sound very likely."

"When was this house built?" R.H. said.

"Late 1800s," Cupid said. "It's Turner Manor. Do you not have an equivalent in your universe? I thought they were functionally identical."

"Turner Manor," she repeated. "Yes of course. It's just been such a long time since I thought about ghost tours that I forgot..."

"If only we could compare this to the Turner Manor in your own timeline," the Corsair said. "I'd be fascinated to know if this was a one-off event or part of a larger plan." She turned to Cupid. "Show me the source."

...

They followed the tentacles to the octopus shaped configuration of symbols at the heart of the house. 

"This is irrefutable proof," the Corsair said gravely. "How could you look at this and have any doubt of what it is?"

"You were always the one who had the most experience with this," he said. "Besides, it's been centuries since I looked into this."

"I wasn't the one with the most experience," the Corsair said softly. "I got a transmission from the Nameless saying she thought she figured out how to crack it shortly before she...Anyway, if she figured it out, the secret was lost with her."

"Where's your Ginger?" R.H. asked.

"She's here with the others," Cupid said. "I should go check on her."

"Are you worried about a leak?"

"It is a primary concern, yes."

"Then go to her. We'll take over here in the meantime. The first priority should be ascertaining a purpose for this structure. Maybe we don't need to crack the code to figure it out."

"Wishful thinking," the Corsair muttered.

"Keep out of sight as much as possible," he warned. "You can approach the others if you need to, but there's a human here who doesn't know about any of this. She's not prepared for an extra Ginger today."

"Who is?" said R.H. under her breath.

...

Cupid returned a few moments later.

"You've got that worried look again," R.H. said. "Did your little favorite spring a leak?"

"I believe so," he said. "But I gave her a treatment for it, so hopefully that will help."

"She's got to work this out on her own," R.H. replied. "You can't help her through it. She's got to be strong enough to face her fears. How much did you tell her?"

"Nothing."

"That's for the best."

He noticed the look on her face. "What is it?"

"Nothing," she said. "This place is just weird, is all. Lots of clocks. And that pendulum on the ceiling in the main hall - what's that about? This place just keeps ticking and I feel sort of like I'm in an egg timer."

"Or a bomb," the Corsair said.

"Don't be dramatic," R.H. said.

"Right, forgot," the Corsair said. "That's the resident Ginger's job." She gestured toward the symbols on the wall. "You know I've noticed something here? The handwriting doesn't match. Right here along the octopus-shaped blob in the middle, it's all entirely someone else. The characters are looser, more chicken scratch. They almost look like lunatic ravings. Then as you follow them along the tentacles, it becomes apparent that someone else is writing some parts of it. By the time you reach the end of the tentacle, the other person has completely taken over. But that's not the troubling part. The troubling part is that I absolutely recognize the original handwriting."

"Whose is it?" R.H. said.

"Don't you recognize it?" the Corsair asked. 

"Yeah, I'm not the greatest at recognizing handwriting," R.H. said. "It could be my own and I still wouldn't know."

The Corsair looked meaningfully at Cupid. "Is there more like this? Maybe notes written down somewhere?"

"Funny you should mention it," Cupid said. 

...

Cupid tried to slip them past Jack's room without being noticed, but it was impossible with all the mirrors.

"Cora?" the Doctor said. "And...R.H. Why are you here?"

"Cupid asked us for help," R.H. said. "Don't make a thing about it. What are you working on?"

"Alex is on the other side of that wall," he said. "She's trying to find a mechanism that using pressure plates in the floor to use these mirrors as lenses to make photographs out of the oxygen and nitrogen in the air."

"Oh similar to Poldrovarian photography?" R.H. asked.

"Yes," he said, a bit taken aback by her knowledge of this technique. "Very similar."

A pounding came from the other side of the wall.

"Alex?" the Doctor said. "Is that you?"

"Yeah!" she called back. "There's a whole room back here! Not very big though."

"What do you see?" he asked.

"I'll send Jack the pictures," she said. She took out her phone and snapped a few pictures. "The whole mirror is a camera rig."

"Using the glass-like surface as a plate," R.H. said. "Smart."

"You know a lot about this?" he asked.

"Gingers are schooled on basic photographic history of technique in my class," Cupid said. "One way or another, they always end up being drawn to cameras."

"Do you see anything else, Alex?" the Doctor asked. 

"Not really?" she said. "Mostly just spiders. Speaking of which - can I come down now?"

"I'd feel much better if you would," the Doctor said. He didn't like the idea of her getting trapped in there somehow, even if the chances were slim.

"But what's the purpose of all this?" the Corsair asked. "I still don't understand..."

"I don't either," the Doctor admitted.

...

Alex climbed out of the chute and started brushing herself off.

"You're absolutely _covered_ in dust," Nova said. She reached out to help Alex dust herself off.

Alex blushed furiously and hoped no one could see.

"We should get upstairs," Jack said. "Not much more to see down here."

"Good idea," said Alex.

"I'm going to stay down here for a bit," Nova said. "I want to look through these photos. Lots of history here."

"You sound like Ginger," Alex said.

...

Alex returned to her room to get her phone charger. The door swung shut behind her.

Alex's heart pounded as she tried to rationalize it. 

"Old houses are drafty. I'm sure you just accidentally swung it shut behind you."

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking..." Alex replied, before realizing who had spoken.

A golden drama mask was sneering at her. "Oh you're _thinking_ now, is it? Someone told you you're allowed to do that now? You can have _ideas_ and know things? Silly little girl, you should just sit back and wait for the grownups to explain before you get yourself into more trouble."

Alex felt a little hurt in spite of herself. She couldn't help that the words cut deep. "How are you doing that?" she asked. She was electing to ignore it. "Some sort of battery...?"

She took the mask off the wall to feel around for its battery pack, but found nothing. 

"Ouch!" she said. She dropped the mask. "You bit me!"

"Well I didn't give you _permission_ to pick me up, now, did I?" the mask asked from the floor. "It was rude and you had it coming!"

The other masks on the wall began shaking. "Rude! Rude! Rude!" they chorused.

"Well I didn't know there was a rule about it, did I?" she asked defiantly.

"You should just know," the gold mask said. "You shouldn't have to always be told everything, you should just know. You're the empath, you should just know."

"Who told you I'm an empath?" she demanded.

"You know what your problem is?" the mask said. "You're an empath so you're supposed to be able to figure things out, but you're too stupid to put the pieces together. Oh sure, sometimes you'll have a lucky guess, but other times you're just so hilariously wrong. You mistake your feelings for theirs or theirs for yours. You're so useless, you can't even keep that straight!"

"Stop it!" she said, determined not to let them know that she was taking these words to heart. "I don't know you, so just shut up!"

"Cutting words," said a low voice from behind her. "Really, I'm sure that told 'em."

Alex's heard leapt as she heard the familiar voice. "Doctor?" she said as she turned to face him. 

It was him, but not him as she knew him now. This was the Doctor from her childhood - the skinny man with the sticky-uppy hair. 

"Dad?" she said.

His face contorted as though he was trying to hold back laughing. "Dad, is it now?" he said. "Dad? Blimey, that's a slap in the face. You know I had real children on Gallifrey. They were really something. And you think you can replace them? You're just some silly human. How could you ever compare? How could you ever think you were good enough to call yourself my daughter?"

This time she felt tears spring to her eyes. "Why are you saying this?"

"Because it's true. You know it is. You were never good enough, Alex Mitchell. Not good enough for Torchwood, not good enough for adoption, and definitely not good enough to ever be my companion. I only take the best. You know that isn't you. You should just stop deluding yourself."

She felt her heart breaking as she accepted the truth of his words...but then stopped.

"Something isn't right," she said.

"It's you, Alex Mitchell," he said. "You're not right. You don't belong."

"No, it's you," she said. "It's not just that the Doctor would _never_ say something that cruel-"

"That doesn't stop him from thinking it-"

"It's that I can't feel you," she said. "You're not really here. If you were, I'd be able to feel your aura. But I can't." It clicked into place. "You're not real."

She ran to the door and it opened easily. She'd half expected it to be locked. She kept running until she found herself back at Jack's room. She threw herself into the Doctor's arms.

"Woah," he said with a smile. He accepted the hug and stroked her hair out of habit. "What's this about, Alex? You miss me?"

"Yes, very much," she sniffled. "I'm sorry I ever doubted you."

He frowned. "What's going on? Are you alright?"

She pulled back and addressed the room. "I just saw something in my bedroom. The masks were talking to me, saying terrible things. Then I hallucinated the Doctor as he used to be. That was worse. He was saying things that you would never say and I almost believed them. But he didn't have an aura. That's what made me realize that he wasn't real. I couldn't feel him."

"You saw this just now?" Cupid asked. "Right this second?"

"Yeah," Alex said. "Why?"

He frowned.

"Ginger _is_ asleep, right?" R.H. asked.

Until that moment, Alex hadn't realized that R.H. wasn't Ginger. "R.H.!" she exclaimed. "When did you get here? And the Corsair?"

"We're just helping out," R.H. said. "But Ginger _is_ asleep, right?"

"I checked on her myself," Cupid said. "She was out like a light."

"Which means..." R.H. replied.

"I was wrong," Cupid said.

"It has been known to happen," said the Corsair.

"Ginger saw some kind of specter in the music room," Cupid explained. "I didn't see it myself, but she said it spoke to her. We both just assumed it was a hallucination. But if she's asleep and medicated, there's no way that this is caused by a leak. There's something else happening here."

"You know it has to do with those symbols somehow," the Corsair said. "Our priority has to be to find out what those mean."

The Doctor clapped his hands. "Right!" he said. "Everyone split up and see what you can find! Alex, you're with me."

He rushed from the room and Alex hurried to catch up. "I am?" she asked. 

"Of course you are," he said as he brushed his fingers along some of the strange symbols on the wall. "Is there anyone else I'd rather have in my corner?"

"I dunno," she said. "Someone more useful, maybe? Ginger's out of the question, but maybe the Corsair or R.H. since they seem to know so much. Or Jack or Sarah Jane - they used to be proper companions-"

"What did that image say to you?"

"What?"

He still didn't turn around as he asked what was on his mind. "That thing wearing my old face. What did it say to you?"

"Nothing," she said. "It's not important."

"Ah, you see, that's where we disagree. I think it's very very important. Something is speaking with one of my mouths and has my daughter all mixed up. I'd very much like to know what it said."

"Well, if you must know," she said. "It said I'm not good enough. You used to have a proper family, so why would a stupid human like me ever think I could measure up?"

"A proper family?" he replied indignantly, finally turning his head to glance at her. "What does that mean _a proper family_? Because if you're talking about blood, that hardly makes a family. You know some species don't even have blood? It's a very humanocentric view of things to think that blood is what makes a family. I loved my children and my children's children, but I love my chosen family just as much. You and Sarah Jane are my family."

"Then why did you take so long to come back?"

He stopped sonicking the wall. "Well that's the question, isn't it? The one everyone asks eventually. Jack, Sarah Jane, Amy, Ginger...I expect one day Susan will ask me the same thing."

"Susan? That was your granddaughter, wasn't it?"

"In another time, she _is_ my granddaughter."

"I don't understand. Wasn't she involved in the Time War?"

"No," he said. "She left Gallifrey long before the war and chose to live a human life. I don't even know if she knows about the war. I never had the heart to go back and tell her that our whole family is dead. I couldn't stand the look on her face when I told her that it was my fault. But that's what it comes down to. That's what you have to understand. The ones who are lucky enough to walk away, of course I miss them. But I'm also terrified to see them again. I want to leave you with the best image of me. I'm always afraid to come back and let you down." He finally turned to her properly. "I hope you understand that me staying away had nothing to do with you. My life got a bit mad for a while, and I couldn't have you mixed up in it. Besides, you're my secret family. For your own protection, no one knows about you. There are forces out there that would stop at nothing to hurt me, and nothing would hurt me more than something happening to you. But I do need you to know that I'm so proud of you. Look at you. My Alexia Mitchell, all grown up. Smart enough to hear the bad things coming out of a face that you trust and know instantly that the face was false. You've come such a long way from the little girl I used to know whose mind was open for all the world to conquer. You've really come into yourself."

It meant a lot to hear him say that. "Is that why you teamed up with me? You wanted to talk me off a ledge?"

"Partly," he admitted. "But honestly, I looked at my options and you're my best bet."

"Me? Why?"

"Because you can tell me what's real. If this house is going to begin toying with us, it might throw things at me that I'm not prepared to face. I need my brilliant daughter to use her empath abilities to warn me off if things get rough."

"I can do that," she said.

He smoothed down her hair affectionately. "I know you can. Now, we've got work to do. I'm assuming that whatever's playing with us is listening in, and I want it to know that it's made me very angry."

"Angry?" she said. "Why?"

"Because it used my face to tell my daughter lies. Honestly, I would've been angry it was toying with you to begin with, but using my face to do it is honestly offensive and it's not something I'm prepared to forgive."

...

Jack, Sarah Jane, and Thea had remained behind in the mirror room.

"How do you think Alex is holding up?" Sarah Jane asked. "I've been worried about her. She's been putting herself through so much."

"I've been worrying about the same thing," Jack said. "Sometimes I think it might've been a mistake leaving her with Ginger all the time. Especially at such a vulnerable time."

"They'll help each other," Thea said. "You'll see. They're really very similar. Alex is very good at holding people accountable, which is just what Ginger needs."

"Yes, but what about what Alex needs?" Sarah Jane asked.

_"You know that what Alex needs always comes secondary to the Doctor. It's all about Ginger. Nobody else's needs could ever compare."_

"Do you really believe that, Jack?" Sarah Jane asked, turning to face him.

But Jack looked puzzled. "I didn't say that."

"But it was your voice," Sarah Jane said.

"Yeah, I know," he said. "I heard it too. But I didn't say that. I wouldn't."

_"Well someone's got to. You've got to know that nothing you do could ever make you matter to him nearly as much as Ginger does. They have a connection you couldn't hope to understand."_

Jack stared at Sarah Jane. "Okay, that was definitely _your_ voice this time, but your lips weren't moving. So unless you've been hiding a secret talent as a ventriloquist..."

Jack's voice spoke again. "Ventriloquism wasn't your particular talent at the freak show, was it, Captain? I believe they billed you as the man who couldn't die."

Jack turned slowly to look at his reflection, which was smiling back at him smugly. "There's that pretty face," it said. "The face of a Greek god."

"This is beginning to be a bit Narcissan," Jack said.

"It was a shame to ruin that pretty face night after night," his reflection said. "Wasting it while you still have it. You think you're frozen in time like one of these photographs, but you're just aging more slowly. You've found the odd gray hair. Will you die when you reach a certain point? Or will you just keep going when you've wasted away?"

"Jack, don't listen to it," Sarah Jane said. "It's toying with you."

"Is that what it's doing?" Sarah Jane's reflection said. "You think this is a game? You have more immediate cause to worry, don't you, Sarah Jane? You're reaching the end of your natural human life span. Whatever will happen to those pretty little children of yours when you're not around to protect them?"

"Don't listen to it," Jack said. "You've got a good few decades still in you. And no matter what happens, the Doctor and I will be around to help your children. You've raised some fine children, they can take care of themselves."

"That's right," Sarah Jane's reflection said. "They don't need you. You're obsolete. An old maid, dying alone without love."

"Not that the Captain's any better," Jack's reflection said. "What's sadder? That people only like him for his looks so he's never truly had love or that one day those looks will fade and then even the shallow connections he has will fade away?"

"This has gone on long enough," Thea said. "Everybody out of this room now. You're right, Sarah Jane, it's toying with us. So we need to not be here."

"Why isn't your reflection saying anything?" Sarah Jane asked.

"It could be because I'm not human," she said. "I'm not sure."

...

They met up with the Doctor and Alex in the room with all the papers. Sarah Jane hugged Alex the moment she saw her.

"You alright mum?" Alex asked. Then she felt the vibe. "Did you see something?"

"Nothing we need to worry about," Sarah Jane said. "We both know it wasn't real. It was simply trying to scare us by playing on very real fears of aging and death."

"It was trying to convince her that something would happen to her children without her," Jack explained.

"Mum, that's ridiculous," Alex said. "Nothing's gonna happen to us. We're tough. Don't go Olivia Crain on us."

"What's this all about, Sarah Jane?" the Doctor asked. "You're more shaken up by this than I would've thought."

"It's nothing," she said. "It's toying with me. It somehow knows that's something I worry about. A lucky guess, I suppose, to play on maternal instincts."

"What I saw was playing on things I worry about a lot," Alex frowned. "So why would you worry about having to leave us? Is there something we should know?"

"No, no nothing like that," she assured her. "There was an incident years ago. Ask Luke or one of the others if you really want to know. It was before you came to live with us. I had a run in with a Qetesh."

"A Qetesh?" the Doctor frowned. "On Earth? Did it hurt you?"

"It did," she admitted. "The damage didn't last long after we defeated it, but it showed me just how fragile I can be. I never want to feel that powerless again. The problem is that I know sometimes it's an inevitable consequence of the human process of aging. I haven't seen any sign of that in myself, besides slightly slowed reflexes and lower energy at times, but the worry is still there."

"Well you don't have to worry about that," Alex said. "I'm right here and you're not going anywhere."

"Not if I have anything to say about it," Sarah Jane smiled.

They were interrupted by a scream that echoed through the halls. 

"What was that?" Alex asked, jumping to a defensive position.

The papers that were strewn around the room began to swirl around as if caught in a breeze.

"You go check that out," the Doctor said. "I'll stay here. I have a feeling something's about to happen and I want to be here when it does. I'll catch up with you once it's played itself out."

The screaming began again, and the others immediately took the Doctor's advice. 

Alex got halfway down the corridor before she stopped in her tracks.

"Alex?" Sarah Jane said. "What's wrong?"

"You three go!" she insisted. "I need to be back with the Doctor! He could need help!"

"Are you sure?" Jack asked.

She nodded. "Go! I'll catch up!"

...

A sheet of paper flew past the Doctor's head and was immediately snatched by a familiar hand. The Doctor turned to see a bewildered Ginger staring at it, her eyes full of sorrow and confusion.

"Some of these are in English," she said without looking at him. "Do you see?"

"Ginger," he said. "Cupid said you were resting. What are you doing in here?"

"You left me," she said. "You knew what it would do to me, but you left me anyway. This is your fault. All your fault. If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have been tortured all my life. All of this is because of you. I was a tick-tick-ticking time bomb."

"Was?" the Doctor repeated. "What're you...?"

A chill passed over him as he saw the trickle of blood begin at the corner of her mouth. "Some of these look like medical records," she said, stuffing the sheet into his hand. "Manic depression to boot, it looks like."

"They said Mr. Moorhouse was mad," he said.

"Not him," Ginger said. "And chronic illness too...Blimey, whoever these belonged to didn't have long to live. I can relate. Or rather I could. When I was alive. _Because you left me here behind, a stupid state of mind and you're gone..._ "

"Ginger-"

She threw her hands in front of her face. _"Don't touch me!"_

She collapsed to the floor and the Doctor ran to her. He wanted to hold her, but respected her wish to not be touched.

"Somebody turn off the life support machine..." she whispered. "Somebody turn off the life support please..."

Alex ran in at that moment. "Doctor, it's not her," she said immediately. "You told me to tell you, so now I am. There's nothing there."

He'd been so caught up in the moment that he'd entirely forgotten what was happening. "Right," he said. "Yeah, you're right. That's not Ginger. I'd know her anywhere, and you're not her."

Ginger's face split into a wicked grin. She got to her feet and he followed suit. He should have been able to feel her breath at this proximity, but he couldn't feel anything.

"Clever girl," the Not-Ginger said. "Very clever girl, pulling you out of that."

"You're the thing that's been toying with us," the Doctor said, eyes flashing dangerously.

She tilted her head to the side. "Am I?"

"You're starting to make me really angry," he said. "First you wear my old face to tell my daughter lies, and now you wear this face. Take it off."

"Oh Doctor, buy a girl a drink first."

He scanned her with his sonic.

"Oooh Doctor," she giggled breathlessly. "That tickles. Do it again."

"I mean it," he said as he pocketed the sonic. "Stop wearing that face."

"I can't. You'll have to make me."

"You're not her."

She laughed. "You think I'm trying to be her? That's funny. I'm not her. But I'm also not me. Here's a little secret, come here..." She leaned in close and whispered. " _I'm not really here."_

"Some sort of holographic projection?" he asked. "Like before with the Pepper's Ghost illusion?"

"You're on the right track," she said. "You're following all the clues but you don't see how they come together. You'd probably be closer to figuring it out if Cupid would stop hiding important information from you. I'm not a projection, at least not the way you're thinking. There's no puppet master anywhere near here pulling your strings. You've got to put your little thinking cap on and see who's really in control here."

Another scream echoed through the halls.

"I know you know this is just a distraction to keep you all isolated and feeding into it," she said idly. "So carry on...Unless you have more questions?"

"Just one," he said. "Who are you?"

"Such a boring little question. I don't know why you waste your time with that one. I've told you. I'm not anyone. I'm not her, and I'm not me. You could think of me as the architect, but I'm not that either. _I don't exist._ So go on. Run along now. Try to solve your little mystery."

"Doctor, come on," Alex said, tugging on his sleeve.

"This isn't over," he said as he began backing from the floor.

"It never is," she sneered. "It's just you and me, forever and ever, revolving and orbiting and throwing space debris when we get too close. Forces of gravity designed to collide and form a supermassive black hole. I'll see you again, Doctor. But hopefully then I'll be me. It would be so fun to play with you properly. Oh and do try to have fun! This is supposed to be a puzzle for you and your girl! Don't take it so seriously!"

...

Alex and the Doctor caught up with the others outside of the dark room.

"Sonic now, Doctor!" Sarah Jane said.

"The door won't budge!" Jack added.

The Doctor turned to Thea.

"I've tried everything I have," she said. "It's jammed somehow and reinforced. I could try blasting my way through, but without the ability to scan the interior of the room I can't predict if I'd have any collateral damage."

"What's happening?" the Corsair asked as she and R.H. arrived with Cupid. 

"We heard screaming," said R.H.

"It's Nova," Alex said as it dawned on her. "That's who's in there, isn't it? She's the only one of us who isn't here."

"Besides Ginger, who is asleep," Cupid said.

The Doctor was trying to open the door with the sonic screwdriver. "This is useless!" he said, kicking the door. "The sonic recognizes that it's not real wood, but since it behaves like wood it confuses it enough that it won't work!"

"I'm going to go get those papers from your room, Doctor," The Corsair said. "Maybe they'll give us a clue." She teleported away and reappeared a second later. She laid them all out on the floor.

"Do you think they'll tell us anything useful?" Sarah Jane asked.

"Maybe there's an extra way in?" R.H. said doubtfully. "Maybe if I stare at it long enough, it'll make sense."

"There's something I'm missing, I know it," the Doctor said. He got to his knees to begin helping with the papers. "There seems to be no rhyme or reason to these. You can't even tell which order you're supposed to read them in because the pages aren't numbered and the characters are marked at random..." He tilted his head. "Try lining them up side-by-side. Maybe they'll form something when they're put together?"

"That's as good an idea as any," the Corsair said.

They started working together to try to fit some together. "Some of these are in English," the Doctor said. "I think we can reasonably count those out."

"Good thinking," said Cupid. "I'll start another pile for the English ones over here."

"What do you think we're looking at?" asked R.H.

"It's starting to look like some kind of map," the Corsair said.

"Possibly," the Doctor replied. "Or a sequence."

"You're right!" the Corsair said. "It's not just a map - it's a sequence!"

"We need to get her out of there!" Sarah Jane said. "If this is a combination, we need to figure out how it works now!"

...

R.H. snatched her hand away from Ginger. Ginger was all caught up now and couldn't help but stare at her doppelganger.

"What...the _fuck_?" she whispered.

"Are you alright, dear?" Cupid asked. "You need a lie down?"

"What did she just do to me?" Ginger demanded.

"A Ginger a long time ago called it a download," Cupid said. "We really don't have time for that now. I'll explain later if you tell me you're alright."

"Yeah," she said. "Her memories are just in my head now, but I know they don't belong to me so it's all good. Things are starting to become clear to me."

"What are you thinking?" R.H. asked. 

"I don't know yet," she said. She glanced down at the papers on the floor. "You've got these almost right..." She got to her knees and began rearranging them. "It's like everything else in this place, I think...It just makes..."

"An octopus," Cupid said, as she finished arranging the papers so the designs on them made an octopus out of the words.

"It's a clue," Ginger said. 

"Or a signature," the Corsair muttered to Cupid.

"They wouldn't leave us without some way to decipher it even without being able to read the letters," Ginger said. "That would defeat the purpose."

"That thing that pretended to be you said this was a puzzle," the Doctor said. "What's the point in making a puzzle that nobody can solve?"

She smiled at him. "Exactly."

He blinked. "Why are you doing that?"

"Doing what?" she said.

"That thing with your face," he said uncomfortably. "It's like you're baring your teeth."

"I'm..." She sighed and the smile slipped away. "Forget it."

"So what's the octopus trying to tell us?" Jack asked.

"Normally I'd think maybe the body represents the heart of the house and the tentacles are corridors," Sarah Jane said. "Except this place isn't shaped like an octopus."

That's when it clicked. "No, but the symbols on the wall are arranged that way! The tentacles always coil at the ends! Maybe they're pointing us to something!"

"Yes!" the Doctor said. "Everyone pick a tentacle and meet back here with whatever we find?"

"Way ahead of you!" said Jack, who had already taken off.

"I'm going to wait here," Alex said. "I don't want Nova to be on her own."

"I'll stay with you," said Sarah Jane.

"Then Thea should wait with you," the Doctor said.

"My pleasure," Thea said brightly.

"What should we do?" Alex said after the others had left.

"Maybe you could try talking to her, Alex?" Sarah Jane said. "We've all tried already, but maybe she'll listen to you."

"Me?" Alex said. "Why me?"

"She obviously likes you," Sarah Jane said. "I wasn't born yesterday, you know. Just see if you can find out what's happening in there while we figure out a way in. We need to at least know if she's hurt."

"Alright," Alex said doubtfully. She cleared her throat as she stepped up to the door. "Nova? Is that you in there?"

"Who's there?" Nova called back.

"It's only me. It's Alex. And, well, Sarah Jane and Thea. Are you able to come to the door?"

"I-I dunno," she said doubtfully. 

"It's alright, it's fine," Alex said. "Can you at least tell me why you screamed? What's happening in there?"

"I uh..." she said. "There were, like, demon rats."

"Demon rats?" Alex replied.

"With glowing eyes. They had sparks coming out of their mouths. They were all out in the hallway so I closed the door and barricaded myself in here."

"Right," Alex said. "I believe you. But I need you to know, we've all been seeing things. This house is playing tricks on us, making us see what we most fear. You've got to remember that it's not real. You can't let the house win."

...

Cupid and Ginger rushed into the clock room.

"They're all 6 hours slow," Ginger said. "And there's a pendulum in the main hall...I feel like there's something significant about that."

Cupid traced the tentacle of words to its stopping place. It was coiled around a particular clock that was shaped like a heart with a tiny hole on top. It chimed the hour and a small Cupid figure complete with a bow and arrow came out of it. 

"Well that's disturbing," Ginger said. "One might almost call it a message." He didn't say anything. "But they wouldn't, right? You don't know what's going on here?"

"Not with any kind of certainty," he said. "I'd tell you if I did."

The Cupid figure began retreating into its hole and Ginger caught it with her hand. She reached her free hand into the hole and came out with a key.

"Very clever," Cupid said. "How did you know that would be in there?"

"I had a hunch," she said. "Come on. Let's go find another..."

Ginger had just left the room when the sound of the ticking clocks began to overwhelm Cupid. He was drawn particularly to an hourglass on a side table. He reached for it and turned it over.

"That's very you, isn't it? Time's eternal spectator. Always standing on the sidelines, never engaging, watching all of us slip away."

Cupid was stung by Ginger's bitter tone as he turned to her. "I didn't mean to be..." Then he went ice cold.

Ginger was lying in the middle of the floor, her arms outstretched like the arms of a clocks pointing very nearly to midnight. Numbers were written around her in her blood. "Did you ever hear of the doomsday clock?" she choked. "Of course you have. You know all the clocks. You know all the time. You're just waiting, biding your time. But you're never in time to save me, are you? Always too late."

Cupid fell to his knees from the weight of grief. "No, it's not true. It's not true."

"It is true. You let us all go to our deaths, Cupid. All you've done is delay mine and prolong my agony..."

Ginger had realized that Cupid wasn't behind her and came rushing back. She observed the scene before her without batting an eye. "Cupid, that isn't me," she said. "You know it's not."

"Another doppelganger," said the not-Ginger. "Don't listen to her. She has no idea what she's talking about. You've kept her in the dark. You didn't tell her the truth until it was too late to save her."

"Cupid, we don't have time for this," said the real Ginger. "Cupid, get up."

"I could've saved you," Cupid sobbed. "You deserved so much better..."

Ginger wasn't good at showing her emotions, but she couldn't help but feel a little moved. She came to his side and forced him to his feet. "We don't have time for this," she said. "That thing is playing on your fears. You know better."

"Ginger, I'm so sorry-"

"I know, and I've already forgiven you. I need you to be okay. Please. I can't have you fall apart on me now."

The definite note of concern and care in her voice that she was trying so desperately to hide is what gave him the strength to pull it together. "We need to get out of here," he agreed.

...

"Alex?" Nova said, in a pitiful tone.

"Yeah?" Alex replied, pressing her hands to the door.

"The pictures are talking to me."

Alex nodded. "Yeah, that makes sense. Don't listen to 'em. They won't tell you anything important."

"There's a picture of my dad..." Her voice broke.

"Don't listen to it. Remember, your dad was a dick. You know it, I know it. Nothing he says could mean anything to you. I want you to focus on what's happening now, okay? Just on my voice."

The photograph of Nova's father scowled at her. "For heaven's sake," it said. "Stop sniveling like an ungrateful child. I've given you everything - money, a place to live, good schools - and still you behave like a wounded animal?"

"I'm sorry," Nova said.

"It's your inferior genetic stock," he said. "It makes you susceptible to fits of emotion. What's wrong with you, Noreen? Why can't you just behave in a manner fitting your station?"

"Nova?" Alex called through the door. "You can't listen to him, okay? He's not real. He's some kind of shared hallucination. We don't know how yet, but we'll figure it out. But he's not really a ghost. He's saying everything you've ever feared he'd say to you. That's why you can't listen."

"You need to use coping skills!" Thea said brightly. "Employ some thought-stopping and maybe some bridge statements if you feel up to it!"

"What?" Nova asked.

...

The Doctor found a key hidden behind a blueprint mounted to the wall in his room. The Corsair found another behind a particular mask in Alex's room.

"What face are you wearing today?" it asked her. "Do you think it's really enough?"

"Oh shut up, you," the Corsair said, throwing it aside.

...

"Thea," Alex said. "I need you to teleport me in there."

"Why?" Thea asked.

"Nova's in a bad way and I need to help her," she said. "I can't do that from out here."

"Now wait just a minute," Sarah Jane said. "You can't know what's waiting for you-"

But it was too late. Thea had seen the logic in Alex's words and had taken her by the arm, teleporting her instantly into the room.

"-on the other side of that door," Sarah Jane finished lamely.

...

Ginger and Cupid ran to the music room, arriving at the same time as Jack and the Doctor. The Corsair wasn't far behind.

"The tentacle goes along the floor!" Ginger said. "It coils around the leg of the piano!"

"It could be under the leg!" the Doctor said as they rushed over to it. "Jack, give me a hand trying to lift this thing. Just enough that we can see if we're on the right track."

"I can help too, you know!" the Corsair protested. "I'm not fragile in this regeneration!"

"Then get over here!" the Doctor said.

_"Uncle Jack? What are we doing?"_

The sound of the young boy's voice made Jack go ice cold. It was a voice he'd heard for years in his nightmares.

"Steven?" he said, refusing to turn around.

"Uncle Jack," the boy said. "I'm scared. You can't just let me die, Uncle Jack. It hurts."

"I'm sorry," Jack said. "There was no other way."

"That's what you all say, isn't it? There's no other way? How many kids have you let die? Were we all for the common good, Uncle Jack?"

"Jack?" Ginger said. "Who is this?"

"My grandson," Jack said. "He was my grandson."

"You don't have to relive this," Cupid said. "I of all people understand an impossible choice. He's not really here."

"Because you killed me," the boy said.

"No, because this is a projection being used to confuse you," Cupid assured him. 

The Doctor scanned the so-called ghost with his sonic. "He's right, Jack. There's nothing here. This is just a projection from your mind, like everything else here."

"How long til your Alex ends up the same way as me?" the boy said.

_"It's a valid question, sir."_

"Ianto?" Jack said.

"Don't look at it," Ginger said. "It's trying to distract us. We must be on the right track."

They managed to lift the piano enough to look under the leg.

"There's nothing here!" Jack said. "No key, nothing!"

"Wait!" said Ginger. "The symbols don't end at the leg! They sort of curve up around it! We're looking for a key, yeah? What if they key is in a literal key?"

"That makes sense!" Cupid said, following the string of symbols as they curved around the front of the piano.

_"How long do you think you can keep this up?"_

This time it was Ginger's turn to go ice cold.

"Now that's really not fair," she said.

It was wearing exactly the face she most wanted to see. This Doctor wore the brown suit she always liked so much.

"I know," he said kindly. "But it's what you need to hear. I mean look at you. Did you really think you could get over me that easy? I got over you easy enough once I knew exactly what you were, but your brain is broken. You want exactly what's worst for you."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh shut it. You really think that's gonna work on me? You're not him. Frankly, it's getting a little old to have people wear that face to get to me. You're not the Doctor. You're just a cheap knock off." She glanced at the real Doctor, who was gawking at her from the other side of the piano. "I know the real thing when I see it." She turned back to the mirage. "So why don't you go pick on someone who doesn't know any better?"

Cupid managed to lift a hollow black key on the keyboard. "Ginger was right! I found the key!"

The mirage smiled wickedly. "I can see I picked the wrong Ginger here. That's alright, though. I know exactly where to find her."

He disappeared.

"No," the Corsair breathed. "R.H."

...

"Woah," Nova said. "She really _does_ teleport."

"Never mind that now," Alex said, crouching beside Nova, who was hiding underneath a table. "We need to get you out of here. It's not good for you to be in here."

"Well how do you think I felt?" said another voice.

"Mum?" Nova said.

Nova's mum was a beautiful dark-skinned woman who seemed to glisten even in the dim lights of the dark room. "It wasn't good for me to be in this marriage, but what choice did I have? You ruined my prospects and wrecked my body. I did the best I could with what I was given, and what did I get in return? A loveless marriage and a child to keep me there."

"Don't listen to her," Alex said. "She's not really your mum."

"I always knew you had peculiar proclivities, Noreen," Nova's mother said.

"Noreen?" Alex repeated. She'd thought she'd heard Nova's father say that before, but she hadn't been sure. "Who's Noreen?"

Nova's mother laughed. "What name has she told you, child?"

"My name is Nova," Nova replied. "I had it legally changed. I even dropped the Hatfield. I didn't want to be associated with the dynasty."

"Well how nice for you to be able to forget where you come from, but you'll always be Noreen to me. What a disappointment you are. Is she not a disappointment?"

The picture of Nova's father answered. "I always hoped she'd grow out of her lesbianism at some point," he said. "But it seems that she has no hope of a respectable marriage. Always cavorting about with unseemly people."

"Most disappointing," Nova's mother replied. "I'd expected better from you, Noreen."

"Listen," Alex said. "Whatever's in this house came to me earlier and said horrible things. It appeared as my dad. But it wasn't true because my dad would never say that to me. I know your dad might, but would your mum?"

"No," Nova said. "But she would've thought them."

"How do you know that?"

"Because everyone does."

"You don't know that," Alex insisted. "You can't know what goes on in someone's mind, but that's really for the best. I need you to trust me, Nova. There's nothing here. Something's playing tricks on us, but I know it isn't real because I can't feel it. I'm going to tell you a secret, alright? I'm an empath. Real, honest to god. And I'm telling you there's nothing here. You've just got to be strong enough to fight back."

"Her?" Nova's father said. "Strong? Don't make me laugh. There's not enough English blood in her to give her the strength to fight back."

"How would you know?" Nova asked. "How would you know when you were never really around? You sent me off to boarding school and were hardly in touch. That's what you do to your grieving daughters in England, I suppose - you ship 'em off so they can't make you uncomfortable. So how could you know what I'm really like?"

"That's it!" Alex said. "You're doing it, Nova!"

"You can both shove off," Nova said, getting to her feet. "Because I think Alex is right - you're not real. You're some manifestation of my worst fears, but what can you do to me really? Some ghosts you are." She backed into the door, shoved aside the chair that had been holding it shut, and unlocked it without looking. "Let's go."

"It was really that easy?" Alex asked. "You've _got_ to be kidding me!"

"It usually is," said Thea. "If you're being trapped inside your mind by fear, the key is usually just to unlock the door. The rest comes after."

"Save the metaphors for later, yeah Thea?"

...

"R.H.?" the Doctor called as he sped through the corridors, almost smacking into walls and barely keeping himself on his feet in his haste. The group had split up. It was very important to find Ginger's doppelganger.

R.H. was in the main hall, staring up at the pendulum on the ceiling. It swung rhythmically back and forth. Something about that unsettled her.

"Oh no, Cherry Blossom, what seems to be the problem?"

The Red Herring felt her heart shatter into a million pieces at the sound of the familiar voice.

"What are you doing here?" she asked the thing pretending to be the Doctor. "Did you just come to stop by before you regenerate?"

"Regenerate?" the man said. "You really think it'll ever come to that? Who do you think I am?"

"I don't understand..." she said.

"Don't you?" he said with a smile. "I came back. I always come back."

"No," she said, shaking her head. "No, that's impossible. You're dead. I saw you die. Our timeline collapsed shortly after, so even if there was a chance it's gone. You can't be here."

"I know, Ginger, I know," he said. "And that's why I'm really not. Not in the way you're thinking, anyway. I'm your ghost, come to haunt you. Did you really think I'd let you go?"

She blinked back tears. "It's impossible," she said. "There's no such thing as ghosts."

"There are more things in heaven and earth, isn't that how the saying goes? We can't possibly know everything. I suppose you could say in a way, this is me holding my last breath. Safe inside myself. Using our connection to come back to you. I need to tell you..."

"What?" she asked desperately. "You need to tell me what?"

He smiled sadly. "I think you know. It's your fault. All of it. It's your fault."

"What?"

"Don't act so shocked. You had to know this was coming. You look at these two and you think that proves that we were in love. We hardly knew each other. I hardly knew you. If I had, I wouldn't've let it go so far."

She collapsed to the floor. "Stop it."

"It's been hundreds of years, Ginger, don't tell me you haven't grown up already. Still so childish. Still so unwilling to admit your own fault. But I suppose that's genetics for you. Your father was never able to take responsibility either."

"R.H.?" said the Corsair as she sped into the room. She glowered at the projection of the Doctor that she knew wasn't real. "Leave her alone."

"Oh look, it's the Corsair," the mirage said. "Almost equally at fault. You know, if you'd killed this Ginger as a baby, none of this would ever have happened. I'd still be alive. But instead she's still here and I'm not. Hardly seems fair, does it? I could've done so much more, but she took that away from me."

"It's not him," the Corsair said. "It's the house playing tricks on you. You know the Doctor would never say such things."

"How would she know?" the mirage said. "Who are you going to listen to? Me or this pathetic pirate?"

The Corsair ignored him and crouched next to R.H. "R.H., listen to me. This is important. He's not real. I wish he was really here too, believe me, because he'd tell you the same thing. The Doctor would never be so cruel to you."

"But I deserve it," R.H. sobbed.

"It's not about what you deserve. It never was. I need you to let this go. He's not going to leave you alone until you let this go."

"She can't," the false Doctor said. "She's never been able to let me go. That's the problem. Gingers are hardwired to cling onto us at any cost. Well look at what it cost this time."

"Do us a favor and spare us the monologue," said a voice.

The mirage turned. "Oh look, it's the other Ginger. Come to defend your counterpart against the truth that we all know?"

"Is that what I'm doing?" Ginger asked. "Doesn't seem natural, does it? I mean what's my motivation? Better yet - what's yours?"

"She needs to know the truth," the false Doctor said. "She needs to know how much it hurt. I don't know what's more excruciating - the actual dying or the way she broke my heart."

"I'm sorry," R.H. sobbed. "I'm so so sorry, I didn't mean-"

"But you did a little, didn't you?" the false Doctor said as he turned back to her. "You'd rather have me dead than know anything at all about you. If you'd wanted me to live, you would've told me the truth."

"It's not that simple," said Ginger. "But this is. R.H., the Corsair is right, you have to let him go. Because this isn't him. This imposter tried to haunt me a few minutes ago, but I knew it wasn't him. It's an instinct. Reach inside yourself. You know it's not him."

"I don't know..." R.H. sobbed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I don't know..."

The real Doctor sped into the room at that moment. "What's happening?" he asked. "What did I miss?"

"It's no good," Ginger said. "She's so mixed up that she can't even tell that it's not him. I know the feeling. She wants it to be him so badly, even if it hurts."

"I'm trying to remember this song," the false Doctor said, thoroughly ignoring everyone except R.H. "But it's been so long since I've heard anything that it's not coming to me. Maybe you can help me. You said to me once that the words in these two lines could be read as a double meaning depending on inflection. I believe I teased you for being dramatic at the time, but I get it now...If I could just remember how that song goes. Ah, yes of course..." His eyes filled with a grim accusation. " _The world is not around because of you. You know I'm not around because of you."_

The Doctor scanned this mirage with his sonic screwdriver, but if he found anything interesting, he didn't say. "I'm afraid I don't know that one," he said.

"I do," said Ginger. "Phantogram."

"You know I never really loved you, right?" the false Doctor said. "I was deluding myself, but I have clarity now. You ruined my life. I could never love you, because I didn't even know you."

"That's not true," the Doctor said.

"It is," R.H. sobbed. "The Doctor could never love me. He didn't even know me. You know how it is, Doctor. You learned what she was and now your feelings changed. That's exactly what the rest of us tried to avoid."

The Doctor glanced at Ginger and managed to catch the hurt look in her eyes before she turned quickly away. He moved to crouch next to R.H. 

"I want you to listen to me, because this is very important," he said gently. "The Doctor did love you."

"You didn't know him-"

"But I did, because I am him. I don't know what happened with you two and maybe I never will, but if I can be sure of one thing, it's that he loved you with everything he had. Maybe it wasn't logical or rational or even particularly healthy, but it's the truth. You were manipulated into thinking that he could never love you because of what you are or where you came from, but if there's anything I know it's that learning the truth about Ginger only made me love her more. I remember the way she'd look at me like she was puzzling me out. She looked at everyone like that, but it was always different. She figured everyone else out quickly so would grow bored. With me, it was like she grew more amused the more she tried to solve me. She always seemed to see right through me. She saw the parts of me that I try to keep hidden from everyone, even those I love. She saw that darkness and accepted it completely. No fear, no shame, just acceptance of everything I ever was or ever would be. And I felt the same for her. I knew who she was before I ever knew what made her that way. I would've done anything to keep her safe. And I have done. That's why I stayed away as long as I did. I got clarity from regeneration, but it didn't change how much I care about her. So I've been doing everything I can to keep us from bad habits because that's what you do when you love someone. Your Doctor would do the same for you. And I know he'd never regret a second of it."

R.H. looked up at the Doctor with tears in her eyes. "So what do I do?"

"You go on," he said. "He'd want you to. He'd never begrudge you your life, because it's more precious to him than anything. So you need to get up. You need to get up and let him go. If for no other reason than I can't stand to see that face in so much pain, which is proof enough that he couldn't stand it either. And know that the Doctor would never blame you for what happened. If anything, he'd blame himself. Either way, it's not very productive. We could spend our entire lives blaming ourselves and it wouldn't even take into account the fact that someone did this to us on purpose. They're the ones who are really to blame."

He held out a hand to her and she stared at him for a minute before placing her hand in his and letting him help her to her feet. 

He smiled. "There she is."

R.H. turned to the false Doctor. "Go," she said, her eyes burning with hatred. "Now. I'm not going to say it again."

The false Doctor smiled. "Suit yourself. You've still got a puzzle to solve."

It disappeared.

The Corsair gripped R.H. by the arms and brushed away any remaining tears. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine," R.H. grumbled as she pulled away. "Get off me."

Ginger stared at the Doctor. "Did you mean...?" She cleared her throat and looked away. "Never mind, it's stupid. We don't have time for this now. I always hate it when there's a life or death situation in a movie and it gets derailed by relationship stuff." She looked to the pendulum on the ceiling. "What's the deal with all these clocks?"

"You've got that look," he said. 

"What look?" she asked.

"The one right before you tell me some mad idea that actually ends up being the answer."

She grinned. "It's not quite to that stage, but the pieces are starting to fit together. Follow me."

"Where are we going?" the Doctor asked.

"To solve the mystery!" she shouted.

...

Alex, Thea, and Nova met up with Sarah Jane outside the dark room.

"Thank heaven you're alright," Sarah Jane said.

"Right," Nova said. "I have an idea."

"What kind of idea?" Alex asked.

"It's more like the beginnings of an idea, really," Nova explained. "But follow me."

"Where are we going?" Sarah Jane asked.

"To solve the mystery!" Nova shouted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween! I'm going on hiatus again for a few weeks! See you again before Thanksgiving!


	17. No One Like You

Cupid sighed with relief when he saw R.H. hurrying along the corridor after Ginger. "R.H.," he said. "Thank heaven you're-"

"No time for that now," R.H. said. "Ginger says she's starting to work it out. Told you two Gingers are better than one."

"Not historically," the Corsair muttered.

"Clocks," Ginger said as she marched along the corridor. "All these bloody clocks."

"And all set 6 hours slow," R.H. added.

"Never mind that for now," Ginger said. "One step at a time. Mostly because that feels like extra info that I don't need right now so I need to tune it out. Clocks. Time pieces. A random language carved everywhere that arranges like a cephalopod. Even the rooms themselves are clues in their own way. Maybe a room full of mirrors that are actually cameras or a room full of masks would look like nothing on their own, but the key was hidden in a piano key."

"Almost like someone meant for you to find it," the Doctor said.

"Exactly," Ginger said. "All these mirror images everywhere and little hints and clues...I don't think we need to understand the language to understand that this whole thing has been set up to only make sense to Gingers. Oh you can probably solve it without us, but it would be _very_ difficult."

"Of course," R.H. said. "This is a trap for Gingers. It all makes sense."

"Trap?" the Doctor repeated. "Who said trap?"

"She did," Ginger said. "Just now. And I happen to agree."

"Just slow down," the Doctor said. "You can't know it's a trap. The thing that's toying with us - it wore your face before. It told me that this place is a puzzle. A puzzle isn't a trap. It's meant to be solved."

"A puzzle is a sort of game or test," Ginger said. "There have to be stakes. If we die here, we fail the test. We prove we're unworthy."

"Die?" the Doctor repeated. "We're not going to die here, Ginger."

She rolled her eyes. "Speak for yourself."

"You understand what this means?" the Corsair whispered to Cupid. 

"Stop it," Cupid hissed.

"I'm only saying," said the Corsair. "If it's a trap for Gingers-"

"Puzzle," Cupid insisted. "I prefer the word puzzle."

"Fine. If it's a puzzle set up so only Gingers can solve it, that means the person who set it knows how Gingers think."

"I know what you're getting at-"

"Don't you think that's a little odd? I mean their brains work so differently from anything else we encountered, yet you still think there must be some other explanation."

Ginger caught sight of Sarah Jane, Alex, Thea, and Nova up ahead. "Oi you lot!" she said. 

"No time!" said Nova. "I'm working on a theory that these strings of words lead to something! I'm going to follow them to see what they're hiding-"

Ginger held up a fist full of keys. "Way ahead of you, but good thinking."

"Woah," Nova said, taking a step toward her. 

"Take them," Ginger said. "It's your house, you should have them. I was thinking maybe they correspond to the other weird locks on the outside door?"

Nova examined the keys for a second. "No, I don't think they do?" she said. "You see the part at the end here where they would lock into place? They sort of twist into funny shapes instead. Some of these symbols on the walls are carved deeper than others. I'm sure these keys fit into them. The question then is what do they unlock?"

"Well let's unlock it and find out," R.H. said.

Nova did a doubletake. "Woah," she said again. "What the hell is this?"

In all the commotion, everyone had totally forgotten that Nova didn't know about the alternate universes.

"Oh ah," Ginger said awkwardly. "It's, well, it's a bit of a long story really-"

"Twins?" Nova said. "That's so creepy, I love it. When did you get here? Have you been here the whole time and just switching back and forth?"

Neither Ginger nor the Red Herring knew quite what to say to that, so they said nothing at all.

"We should each take a key and find where they fit," Sarah Jane said helpfully.

"No I don't think so," Ginger said. "Everything about this has been conveying a very specific message. It's all about mirror images, yeah? I think that connection means something else, but just in case it relates to us then R.H. and I should stick together. I think we need to be in the room where you found the Pepper's Ghost illusion. But everyone else, take a key and see if you can fit them in somewhere."

"I think I can tell you where each of these goes," Nova said. "Everyone take out the maps I gave you, and I'll mark down where you should go."

...

Nova and Alex raced toward the main hall. They reached the landing and looked out over the pendulum swinging from the ceiling. 

"Keep on this floor," Nova commanded. "I'll go left, you go right. Our keyholes should be exactly parallel to each other."

Alex nodded and took this advice. She traced her fingers along the strings of symbols on the wall.

"I don't see it," she shouted. Her voice echoed back along the passage.

"Remember not to look for a keyhole," Nova reminded her. "Find something deep inset into the wall that looks like that key will fit into it."

"Right, right," Alex said. She looked around, growing more anxious as the moments went on. Then relief. "I found it."

"So did I," Nova said. They locked eyes from directly across the main hall through the glass barrier that ran along the length of the hall. "Alright. Count of three?"

"Three...two...one..."

They turned their keys at the exact same moment. Something inside the wall activated the towers to creak and twist. They rotated until their outer windows were facing inward and their glass ceilings reflected light inward.

"Woah," Nova said. "I had no idea they did that."

...

Sarah Jane consulted her map and found herself back outside of the mirror room. She traced her fingers along the wall until she found the shape Nova had described. She put in the key and turned. Instantly, a mechanism in the wall caused the opposite wall to slide into itself as the mirrors began to fold out into the hallway, blocking exit from that direction.

...

The Corsair found her keyhole near the music room, where the stained glass window shifted and began the refract light back out into the hallway.

...

Thea's key fit in the clock room. Each of the clocks instantly wound back to their proper time and the pendulum on the ceiling of the main hall began swinging faster.

...

That left Cupid, whose key fit in the wall next to the room with the Pepper's Ghost illusion.

"What are you thinking?" he asked.

"Each side of the partition is functionally identical," Ginger said, examining the small room. "One bed, set at what would be considered to be a mirror image. Sparse furnishings that achieve the same effect. It's almost begging me to see this as a taunt. It's symmetry. All things being the same. It makes sense to me somehow that if we're going to solve the puzzle, we need two of us. Two Gingers."

"One on each side of the glass partition," R.H. said as she understood.

"Exactly," Ginger said. 

"What do you think happens when we do?" R.H. asked.

Ginger shrugged. "Who knows? But aren't you a little curious to find out?"

"Just speaks to my original instinct," R.H. said. "That this is a trap. If this was made for us, whoever made it would know how curious we'd be. Alice is positively unable to convince herself not to go down the rabbit hole."

"So we don't resist," Ginger said. "We jump. You up for it?"

R.H. stared at her. "Ready when you are." She nodded at the Doctor. "Isn't he supposed to try to stop us?"

"He won't," Ginger said. "He'll have a few hollow protests because he doesn't want us to risk our lives, but he's as curious as we are. If he could do it himself, he would. But he can't. Isn't that right, Doctor?"

"It's spooky, you know that?" the Doctor said. "How well you know me, I mean."

The corners of her mouth twitched. "Yeah. Spooky."

That was the moment when the pendulum began swinging faster. They couldn't see it, but they were immediately aware of the change.

"Did you feel that?" Cupid asked.

The Doctor was positively giddy with this change. "A powerful psychic field just went up! That's brilliant! No, wait, hold on...It didn't just go up, it's always been there, I just wasn't scanning for it! Of course..." Something about his earlier readings began to make sense.

"It's not that it just appeared, it's that it just got stronger," R.H. agreed. "It was always there, in the backs of our minds."

"It made it so we wouldn't notice it," Ginger said. "Psychic fields are almost undetectable at low-frequency."

The Doctor smiled at her. "Unless you're very clever."

She smiled back. "Alright, R.H. and I need to jump. Be ready to follow."

Ginger and the Red Herring positioned themselves one on each side of the glass partition at the center of the room.

"We need to be in exactly the same position," Ginger said. "For symmetry."

"Right," R.H. said. "Count of three?"

"One..." Ginger said.

"Two..." said R.H.

"Three," they said together.

"Geronimo," whispered the Doctor.

They both jumped into the same spot on either side of the partition. They watched as their reflections focused and merged, and the light beam through the center refracted it outward. The image of the Gingers hit an almost invisible mirror on the floor in the hallway, bounced off another on the ceiling, bounced again off another on the floor, was refracted outward by the stained glass ceiling in the music room, used the glass barriers on each level of the main hall as a focusing beam, was reflected off of the inward facing window on one tower then off the other before settling directly in front of the octopus-shaped wall of symbols. 

"Where is it?" Ginger asked. "Where did it come out?"

"Stay right where you are until we give the signal," Cupid said.

The Doctor followed the light beam the whole way and slid to a stop right before he could crash into the projection.

"It's here," he said. "It's somehow right here, I can feel it." He pressed against the wall of words and just listened. "There's something back there."

The others joined him.

"Did we do it?" Alex asked. "Did we find it?"

"Almost," the Doctor said. His eyes found a symbol he hadn't noticed before. "What's this..."

"It looks like a sort of clock," Nova said.

"Or a planet," R.H. offered. "A clock-shaped planet?"

"No," the Doctor said. "It looks like a Xelywyk board."

The Corsair glanced at Cupid. "Oh does it?" she muttered tensely. "A Xelywyk board, you say?"

"Don't," Cupid said in a low voice.

"But it can't be," the Doctor breathed obliviously. "It's impossible. And completely out of place. There's no other Gallifreyan imagery anywhere in here...It has to be a coincidence..."

"Except you don't believe in coincidence," Sarah Jane smiled.

The projection of the Gingers spoke irritably. "Can we come down there now?" Ginger asked. "Bit boring standing here."

"Go ahead," Cupid said. "We could probably use you down here. Find the Octopus again."

"Easy enough," said R.H.

The image disappeared. 

"Maybe we're thinking of this all wrong," the Doctor said. "A Xelywyk board could be the missing link here. You can't play a good game without a psychic field and a temporal disturbance or two. And we know this is a puzzle, but it seems to defy logic. In fact, the defiance of logic is why it seems so likely it was catered to a Ginger."

"Thanks," Ginger said dryly as she and R.H. arrived.

"We need to think of this nonlinearly," the Doctor said. "It's not supposed to make sense, except to a Ginger. What's the next move?"

R.H. was examining the wall again. "Say, did any of you notice these holes in the wall before?"

They all moved to get a closer look. "Those definitely weren't there before," the Corsair said. "I'd remember."

"They sort of look like..."

"...fingerprint scanners," Ginger finished.

"There's a set on each side of the octopus," said R.H.

"Another mirror image?" Ginger said.

"There's one in the middle too," said Nova. 

"That might just be a glory hole," said Jack.

"If you don't shut up," warned Alex.

Ginger looked at the Doctor. "What are you thinking?" she asked. "Big enough for a sonic?"

This was starting to feel just like old times. "Right. You two put your hands on the scanners and I'll sonic it?"

"Sounds like a plan," she agreed.

"On the count of three?" said R.H.

"One..." said Ginger.

"Two..." said R.H.

"Three..." said the Doctor.

Their hands slid perfectly into the fingerprint scanners as the Doctor stuck his sonic into the wall and pressed the button. The wall opened.

"A lift?" Nova said.

"In a house from 1900?" added Sarah Jane.

"There were lifts in 1900," said Alex. "Or at least there were that time we were in New York for the Shirtwaist Fire, I dunno if that counts?"

"No, you're right," the Doctor said. "There were rudimentary elevators going back as the 1850s on Earth. But this appears to be automatic and fully automated."

"That's definitely not period accurate," said both of the Gingers and Cupid.

The Doctor's face split into a grin. "Cool, isn't it?" the Doctor asked. "Everyone in?"

"Are you sure that's wise?" Sarah Jane asked.

"She's right," the Corsair said. "You don't know where this is leading us. This is all starting to seem a little too easy."

"Exactly," the Doctor said. "We're focusing so much on how this place is rigged to make the Gingers curious that we forgot I'd be as well. I don't want to put anyone in danger, so if you want to stay behind, you can." He waited for the words he knew would never come. "Right. Now that's settled. Who wants a lift?"

They began filing into the cramped space. 

"I don't think they were expecting more than three people," said the Corsair.

Alex caught the Doctor's sleeve before he could go in.

"I think you should know," she said. "Nova saw ghosts of her parents."

"I expected she might," the Doctor said. "But these are psychic manifestations, nothing more."

"I'd normally agree," she said. "And I do, about her mum, but...Doc, the dad felt real. Not properly real, but real enough. I don't know what to make of that."

"I don't either," he admitted. "But thank you for telling me. It could be important." 

He and Alex were the last to enter the elevator.

"Last chance to back out," the Corsair said as the doors began to close.

"I have only one thing to say to that," the Doctor replied.

"And what's that?"

He grinned as the doors finally closed and the elevator shot upwards. "Geronimo!" 


	18. Doing the Right Thing

The elevator came to a stop and the doors slid open to reveal a darkened room.

"Where are we?" Sarah Jane asked.

"I don't know," Nova said. "I've never seen this room before, and I've been in every room."

"Every room," the Doctor said. "Except one."

Nova looked up at him. "You don't think?"

"Only one way to find out."

They moved cautiously into a cube-shaped room with a balcony at one end.

"Does anyone else feel that?" Ginger asked.

"Yeah," R.H. said. She turned to Cupid. "Dimensional pocket?"

Cupid and the Corsair nodded. "Dimensional pocket," they agreed.

The Doctor jumped up and down like a small child. "Of course! A dimensional pocket! That's why no one has ever found the way up here! This room only exists if you come in the proper way, otherwise it's out of sync with our own reality."

"Brilliant," Ginger said.

"Oh my god," Nova breathed. "I did it. Nobody in over a hundred years has been able to find the way into this room and I've done it. Suck it, dad."

"What is this place?" asked Alex.

"I think it was a bedroom," Ginger said, noting a bed near the balcony.

The Doctor clutched the sides of a crib. "Or a nursery."

"The Moorhouses never had children," Nova said.

"That you know of," the Doctor said, half-glancing at Ginger. "People have secret children all the time. But I don't think this crib was ever used. I can't know for sure...I just get the feeling."

Ginger had found a panel on the wall with some buttons. She knew she should show some restraint, but she trusted her instinct and pressed the center button. Immediately, a hologram of a man sprang forth.

"Doctor!" Ginger said.

"I don't really understand how this works," the hologram said. "Are you certain this will work?" He paused then carried on. "If you've found this, then I've died, but not in the house. I probably owe you an explanation. I don't rightly understand it myself. You have to understand why I had to do this. My wife got ill when she was carrying our child. The child was stillborn and my wife never properly recovered. Doctors gave her two years at most. They said she needed rest, somewhere with air. That's when my benefactor came to me, offering a perfect scrap of land in the Welsh countryside. I was promised that if we built the house with the provided materials to specification, it would be the secret to eternal life. And it worked. I don't understand how, but I've been told that living a life in this house coupled with the energy burst from the brain at the moment of death permanently imprints your essence into the house. The word that was used is 'saved'. People who die in the house have their energy 'saved' to the house. I'm not certain what that means. But it's remarkable. Miraculous, even. When my wife passed on, she remained here with me. But she still wasn't well. Whenever I had to leave her even for a short time, she would become inconsolable. So I found a way to use the clocks to time her arrival. When the hand reached the predetermined moment, then she would arrive. She'd be unconscious until such time, then she'd reappear just in time for me to arrive home..."

"That tracks," Ginger said. "I knew there was something about the clocks! Her haunting is directly tied to when the clocks wake her up!"

"Yes," the Doctor said. "It's all starting to make sense! You said before about the pendulum generating energy - that must be right on the money! It's also responsible for the psychic field that's been tricking our minds! I noticed it before, that these things we're seeing are directly generated from our own minds. When I sonic a ghost, all I see is an energy signature tied to your brain using it as a projector. The rooms may have been a specific game for the Gingers, but they were also telling us what we needed to expect. Everything _is_ about projections and images. The walls that take pictures, the glass partitions that separate identical rooms - all that was leading us to know that these things are an image of what was once a reality, but no longer is." He sonicked the hologram, instantly turning it off.

As the hologram disappeared, Ginger became aware that the lady she had seen in the music room had returned.

"Hello," Ginger said. "Sorry, I didn't know if you were real before. I thought you were all in my head."

"Ridiculous," said the lady. "Since you're all in mine. My husband says I simply have to ignore you and you shall go away."

"She's real," Alex said. "Not real as I understand real...sort of...muted. As if I'm feeling her from a long way away. The same way Nova's dad was."

"What?" Nova said.

"And I can almost perceive something of an aura around her," Cupid said. "Though that may be a trick of the field around her."

"She feels like reality," Ginger said. "But not. She's something that shouldn't be. I've felt that before."

The Doctor sonicked the ghost. "She seems more real. I've scanned every manifestation I've encountered today, and with the exception of that last obvious hologram, they've all been psychic projections from our minds. But this...This is truly exciting. She's real. She's energy. I encountered a similar process in the Library ages ago, but this is different. Full consciousness integration. She _is_ herself. She exists whether or not we're here to witness her. She's incredible."

Ginger's eyes fell on a clock on the wall. Things were falling into place. "Your husband, he told you to wait for him, yeah? Gave you a time on the clock?"

"I wake at 5 every day," she said. "I am told to watch the clock. If he's not home when I wake, he'll be home before 6."

"And one day he didn't come home. Is that right?"

A despair entered her eyes. "It's been so long now. I can't even remember how long."

"Hard to keep track of time, yeah," she said. "What's your name?"

"Lilah," she said. "Lilah Moorhouse."

The Doctor remembered something he'd only glanced at before. "She has manic depression," he said. "Lilah Moorhouse. Her name was on the paperwork that we found in English. I only glanced at it, but it was described as manic depression. Bipolar disorder. Prone to fits of melancholy dementia."

"Alright, yeah," Ginger said. "We can work with that, it's fine. Lilah, can I ask you something? And I want you to be very honest with me because it's very important."

"I can try," Lilah said.

"How are you feeling?"

It was a simple question, tactful almost. Nobody expected that sort of question from Ginger, least of all Lilah herself.

"I feel fine," the ghost lied. "Absolutely tip-top."

"Not the lie you tell yourself, dear," Ginger said. "I mean how are you feeling? Do you feel anything?"

"Just sad," she said. "And confused. And frightened. I do miss my poor husband so."

"Do you know what year it is?"

"Now see, I've never been terribly good at keeping up with things like that. It's why the clock system was devised in the first place."

"The year is two-thousand and twenty-one," Ginger said gently.

"What?" said Lilah. "No, that doesn't make sense."

"It does," Ginger said. "Which is why I'm asking how you're feeling."

"A ghost asking how I'm feeling-"

"I'm not a ghost," she said. "I'm very much alive. I'd argue that you are too, because you still feel those horrible feelings that make you alive. Believe me, I get it. I'm hurting too. I miss someone so much and I...I don't know how to handle it most of the time. But it's not just the emotional pain that I feel. It's physical. I can feel how cold this room is. I can feel the breeze coming in from the balcony. Lilah, can you tell me how long it's been since you've eaten something?"

"I..." She frowned. "I don't..."

"You don't remember, do you? That's alright, that's fine. But every living thing needs to eat-"

"Actually-" the Doctor said.

"Not helping," Ginger said swiftly. "Lilah, what was the last thing your husband said to you?"

"He said he'd be back when I woke up," Lilah said. "He said to check the clocks."

"But he didn't come back." Ginger squeezed her eyes closed and turned back to the group. "That's what all this is about. No one ever told her." She looked at Nova. "Did they? Did you ever bother to tell her?"

"I didn't know she was like... _real_ real," Nova admitted.

"Ginger?" the Doctor said. "What is this?"

Ginger shook her head and turned back to Lilah. "Oh Lilah, I'm so very sorry. You deserved better than this. Waiting, always waiting for him to come back. But nobody bothered to tell you the truth. He's not coming back."

"No," Lilah said. "What are you trying to say? That he left me? My sickness finally got the best of him and he loves me no longer?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all," Ginger said. "He loved you _so much._ He did. He did everything in his power to help you, even if it didn't work out in your best interest. But he died. I'm so sorry, but he's been dead for over a century. If he could come back, he would. But he can't."

The Doctor touched Ginger's arm. "Are you sure she can handle knowing this?"

"She has to know the truth," Ginger said. "There's absolutely nothing worse in this world than waiting in the dark with no way of knowing what happened."

"She's right," Sarah Jane said. "Of course she's right."

"Lilah?" Ginger said. "You alright?"

"No," she said. "Not in the slightest. I can't...feel anything. Only sorrow, but nothing physically...My dear ghosts, have I been dead all this time?"

"Yes," Ginger said. "I'm afraid you have. I'm sorry you've been stuck here all this time with no answers and no way out. It sounds like a fate worse than death."

"I can't believe this," Lilah said as she began to cry. "My husband? Dead? I am truly all alone? Can you bring him here to me? If you could bring me back, surely-"

"I wouldn't even if I could," the Doctor said. "It was a cruelty to lock you in here in the first place. I wouldn't condemn anyone else to it."

"He was beside himself when you were ill," Ginger said. "He tried his best to make you well, but it only made you both sicker. You'd be no good to each other like this. You have to let him go, Lilah."

"No," she said. "No, I can't. I have to wait for him in case he comes back-"

"You have to," Ginger said. "I'm so sorry. You have to let go. Look around you. The same routine, day after day. Agonizing, wondering, waiting. I'd say that's no kind of life. How does it not drive you mad drifting here in the dark with nothing to do? You have to let go. Accept that things end. Stop waiting around for someone to come back and save you from the prison they accidentally left you in. Let go, Lilah. He loved you, so this isn't what he wants for you."

"I don't know if I know how," Lilah admitted. "I've been clinging to an idea for so long..."

"I know." She turned to the Doctor. "How can we help her?"

"I suspect there are two ways," the Doctor said. "The first would require turning the machine completely off. We'd have to stop that pendulum."

"And the second?" Nova said. "I'm sorry, no one's gonna buy this house from me without a working pendulum."

"There has to be some storage up here," the Doctor said. "Likely behind that wall panel. We can release her and any other trapped consciousness without powering down the machine. But wouldn't you want to power down the machine? I don't know why you'd want to keep it on."

"We can talk about this later," Nova said. "But I think it's important we release anyone trapped in there." She glanced at Alex. "My dad's still in there. Isn't he."

Alex nodded. "I think so."

"So the things he said to me..."

"I couldn't tell you. I didn't know him."

"Right," she replied. "Yeah."

...

The Doctor removed the panel on the wall and had to constantly be reminded not to fawn over the complexities of the machine. Jack assisted any way he could, while Alex held up a flashlight.

Ginger watched the progress from across the room.

"Are you scared?" she asked Lilah without looking at her. "About dying, I mean?"

"How can I be frightened of something I've already done?" asked Lilah.

"Easy," Ginger said. "People are frightened of loads of things they've already done. It's how phobias and traumas get started."

"Thank you for telling me," the ghost said. 

"Don't mention it," she said. "You deserved at least that much. You deserved to know you weren't abandoned on purpose."

"That should do it!" the Doctor exclaimed. "The psychic field generated by the pendulum should still work, but the house won't be able to store imprints of people anymore. Did it work?"

Ginger glanced to her side to find no one there. "Yeah. She's gone."


	19. Edit the Sad Parts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read Season 1 of this before Monday (11/30/2020), then know that Chapter 45 ("Better Version of Me") was revised to be a time loop chapter. This is referenced in this chapter.

Alex spotted Nova sitting by herself at the foot of the stairs. She sat next to her. 

"Weird night, huh?"

"For me?" Nova smiled. "Yeah. For you? This must be every day. I've been picking up on some of those words you've thrown around. I'm amazed you haven't tried to be more secret identity about it."

"I normally would," Alex admitted. "But I dunno, I've got a good feeling about you. To be honest, I'm a little tired of running from who I am. Pretending to be normal is sort of exhausting."

"And a bit unnecessary these days. I mean, unless you've got some really bad secret, everyone knows about aliens. Anyone who's anyone these days has an invasion story."

"Yeah, I guess that's true."

"So your dad. I don't wanna assume since I was so wrong last time, but...I'm picking up on some weirdness with him and your roommate. Is that like..."

"A thing?" Alex smiled. "Yeah, it is. Was. I dunno, tenses are all weird. It was before she moved in with me. They've always been complicated."

"Wild. And her twin-"

"That's a long story. One that doesn't belong to me."

"Right, yeah, of course. I respect that. It's a story that doesn't belong to you. But people keep saying it was a trap, like, for her specifically. So it really makes me wonder who you people are that people are building traps for your dad's ex."

"If anything, it's a trap for both of them. They tend to be a package deal. But I agree with them. Something about this place would only make sense if your brain worked the way Ginger's does."

"When were you going to tell me that you thought my dad was real?"

It was a poor choice of words, but Alex knew instantly what she meant. "I didn't want to upset you til I knew what was happening for sure."

Nova nodded. "And you can just, what, feel things?"

"I'm an empath," Alex admitted. "Gotta be good for something, eh? Else why would they keep me around?"

Nova's eyes lingered on her face as if taking in all that she was. "I can think of a few reasons." She smiled. "So. Empath, huh? What're you picking up on now?"

Alex hesitated before smiling. "I'm picking up that it's been a long day and we're all tired and emotional. We'll talk in the morning, yeah?"

"Alright, Alex Mitchell," she smiled. "We'll talk in the morning."

...

The Corsair watched from across the room as R.H. assisted the Doctor in doing some final calibrations to make sure the house was safe.

"It's a remarkable piece of technology, actually," the Doctor said. "I've never seen anything like it. It uses our own synapses against us. Our movement throughout the house helps to generate power. Without us, it would just be dormant tech."

"It's sort of like a brain," R.H. mused. "We're little cells moving around, generating electrical signatures. You know, I still don't get what the end game was."

"Probably because you didn't play the game as intended," the Corsair said.

R.H. tilted her head as she considered this. "And how was the game intended to be played?"

"Damned if I know," the Corsair replied. 

"Gingers have predictable patterns, up to a point," Cupid said. "Everything is always laid out so carefully so things will always go exactly the same way. You will deviate eventually, but things will happen as they're intended to happen. But the Ginger in this universe, she never played the game by its rules. She deviated from the plan from the word go. From that day on, she couldn't be predicted. I myself had carefully laid plans that were meant to go a certain way, but she did things differently and made things take a lot longer. If this is a game meant for Gingers, we don't know if it's intended for a Ginger at this point in her timeline-"

"How could it be?" asked the Corsair. "This point has never been reached."

"This is a trap that would make much more sense targeting me specifically," R.H. said. "Just in retrospect. Ginger hasn't actually lost anything. Not the way I have."

"My point was that this all feels very anticlimactic and easy," said Cupid. "Which probably means that we figured it out before it could get really interesting. Which means we blew past the end game entirely. She's done it before. No reason to think that's not what happened here."

"Do you think she'll be alright?" Sarah Jane asked. "This is rather more stress than I thought we'd be putting on her."

"Did you hear all that stuff she said?" Jack added. "It sounds to me like something about this kickstarted her ability to process." He looked at Cupid. "But you'd know better than me."

"I think she's reached acceptance," Cupid said. "It took her long enough, but she's finally allowing herself the freedom to feel."

"Oooh no, don't touch that wire," Thea cautioned. "That could compromise the entire electrical grid."

"I know that," the Doctor said. "I was just...testing you."

Cupid sidled up to the Corsair. "You're staring."

"I'm on lookout," the Corsair said. 

"That's just staring with a purpose," Cupid said. "What's on your mind?"

The Corsair didn't take her eyes off R.H. as she answered. "Do you think she's alright? Your honest evaluation, please."

"I haven't been around her enough recently to make that kind of evaluation."

"Please, you can tell instantly if someone's not right."

"And you're spending an awful lot of time with her. You'd be more equipped to make a judgement than I."

"You don't think she's..."

"What?"

"Relapsed?"

"That's quite the accusation. I assume you haven't just asked her."

The Corsair glared at him. "Would I be standing here if I had?"

"Fair point. You'll need proof. Do you have any?"

"No. Only an instinct that she hasn't been right since last time we visited Earth."

"When was that?"

"When your Ginger forced her to remember her most traumatic memories."

"Ah. I did worry that might force her over the edge."

"But you're not picking up on anything unusual?"

"Honestly? R.H. has been difficult to get a read on for several centuries. She's sort of deadened herself to the world. It's not at all a healthy place to be."

"Don't give me some kind of roundabout explanation that actually tells me nothing. I'm not a Ginger. I know better."

"I'm sorry. What would you like to know?"

"She sneaks off in the night, thinks I don't notice."

"Have you confronted her about this?"

"Again I ask if you think I'd survive that process."

"You haven't followed her, have you?"

"No," she admitted. "I keep wondering if I should. But she always comes back, so it's not like she's trying to give me the slip. I'm just worried..."

"Worried? About her?"

She crossed her arms and stared him down. "Worried she might compromise the integrity of our mission. I'm not sentimental about a Ginger. I don't get attached. She should've been able to tell immediately that the psychic projection downstairs wasn't the Doctor. It's nearly impossible to fool a Ginger."

"Unless they want to be fooled," Cupid said. "Yes, I have to admit, that did worry me. The Ginger from this universe dismissed her psychic projection out of hand."

"Exactly. So if her ability is impaired, that suggests to me a deeper issue. I wondered if you'd noticed any signs on your end."

"Too early to say. Like you, I don't want to risk setting her off without more evidence."

"So what do you suggest I do?"

"Monitor the situation."

"Report back to Counsel if I find anything?"

"God, no!" he said, as if shocked she would say such a thing. "They'll string her up! Report back to me. We'll decide how best to handle it. I don't want the Counsel involved unless absolutely necessary."

"Noted."

...

"She sort of just ran off."

Cupid didn't even have to ask who he meant. "Not even bothering to beat around the bush anymore, are we?"

The Doctor approached Cupid and stood next to him, admiring the pendulum from behind the glass barrier. "Is there a point?"

"I suppose not. And I suppose she felt she had no purpose up there with all the technical stuff happening. But did you see how she looked at you before she left the room?"

"I wondered about that. I'm not sure what to make of it."

Cupid smiled. "You're giving her time though. I appreciate that."

"I've learned my lesson. I always do precisely the wrong thing. Maybe sometimes I need to do the opposite when it comes to her. If my instinct is to rush in, I need to give her room to breathe. Can I ask...What did you give her? She's been different ever since you did."

"Call it a sort of medication for our kind. I've been saving it just in case."

"She'll be alright now?"

"In time, perhaps. But it's up to her."

"And another thing. That download R.H. did with her...That's something they can just do? Timelords have ways of transferring or walking through memories, yes, but to do such a short burst so quickly without having to bypass Ginger's internal walls would normally be a bit more painful. To do anything that quickly, I always have to bash my forehead into someone. Blunt force, allows for a brief burst."

Cupid smiled. "Doctor, it's a good thing you're so thick. You'd be concussed by now, otherwise."

He walked away.

"Hold on, that's not an answer!" the Doctor protested. "One day, you'll have to give me one, you know!"

...

The Doctor found himself pulled to the music room by a familiar sound. He didn't want to disturb her, so he stayed hidden. She was leaning against the piano and playing lazily.

_"How long will I be waiting?_   
_Until the end of time_   
_I don't know why I'm still waiting..."_

She stopped playing abruptly as she wiped away the slow trickle of tears that was threatening to overwhelm her. She adjusted her glasses and sat up straighter when her eyes refocused on the man in the doorway.

"Doctor," she said, doing her best to appear unruffled. "How long have you been-"

"Not long," he assured her. "I was just coming to say that I'm leaving."

She didn't know why that felt like such a blow to her. "You're not staying the rest of the night?"

He smiled. "Is there a point? Mystery solved."

 _Well, one mystery, anyway,_ he thought to himself.

"You don't have to leave on my account," she said. "I know I've been a little-"

"It's not your fault," he assured her. "It's just time for me to go. You know I don't stay anywhere long."

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "The way I've treated you has been completely unacceptable-"

He held up a hand to stop her. "You don't have to say anything. I completely understand."

"You always do. I just don't want you to go away thinking that I really meant-"

"I'm not taking any of it personally, if that's what you mean," he lied. "And you've been right anyway. I haven't handled any of this the way I should've. I can't blame you for being hurt. I should've been here sooner or at least kept in touch. I ghosted you, and that's completely unacceptable. Keeping you in the dark like that...That would be hard on anyone, but it's unacceptable to do to you. I thought nothing could hurt more than staying away, but apparently hurting you - even accidentally - does."

She smiled. "Now that's a little dramatic, don't you think? We both know there are things in this world that hurt us far more. We're just..."

"Addicted?"

"Yeah."

"My new phone number is in your phone now," the Doctor said. "If you need me for any reason, I'll be around. But I think it's best for now if I go. Sarah Jane has already asked for a ride home, so I'll take her too."

"Could you take me too?" she asked. "I'm sort of beat and I'd rather go to sleep in my own bed. This place makes me kinda sad."

"And leave Alex all alone in this big house with Nova?" he said.

A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. "We'll leave Thea and Jack with her. To chaperone. Sometimes people need those, you know."

"Understood," he said. "I just need to say a quick goodbye to Alex, then I'll meet you downstairs in-"

She could see he was about to dash away, so she stood up quickly. "Wait," she said. 

He saw the look of urgency on her face. "I'm waiting," he said. "What is it?"

She stood completely still, the look on her face indicating how agonizing it was to try to find the proper words. "Doctor, I-"

He held up a hand again. "Say no more. I know."

"But I need to say it-"

"No you don't. I already know. You're sorry. You don't have to say it again. You're forgiven. Water under the bridge. Now, I'll meet you downstairs in ten, right?"

And then he was gone.

"That's not what I was gonna say," she whispered to an empty room.

...

Ginger waited in the main hall while the Doctor said goodbye to Alex.

"Can I ask what that was?" Ginger asked. 

Cupid didn't even have to ask what she meant. "It's a sort of medication for our kind. Activates the synapses in a very particular way. Gingers tend to have the most vivid reactions to it."

"So why not give it to me before? Why bother with all that other stuff?"

"Because it can be dangerous. If you're too far gone, you could choose to stay in your dream world. Disconnect from reality all together. That's also why I didn't tell you what it would do. If you were aware, you wouldn't try to work it out for yourself. You're a curious sort and when something bothers you, you follow it through til the end. I needed you to follow the thread until you found acceptance and worked through your traumas. Can I ask what you saw?"

She looked away and blinked rapidly. "It was him. As he used to be. As if nothing had ever happened. No Doppelginger, no backstory...Weirdest part is, there was no Alex. Jack and Sarah Jane also didn't know me."

"Your mind was trying to isolate you," he nodded. "So you'd have to work it out on your own. That makes sense. But you let him go in the end?"

She nodded. "I always do. It never gets easier."

"Give it time."

Ginger turned to see Sarah Jane. "You were right," Ginger said. "I've been going about this all wrong."

Sarah Jane just looked at her for a moment. "Can I hug you?"

Ginger blinked. "What?"

"I don't need to," Sarah Jane explained. "I know you have problems being touched. But I'm offering, if you need it."

Ginger considered this, then nodded. Sarah Jane stepped forward and took her in a motherly embrace. Ginger felt strangely comforted. 

"It'll be alright," Sarah Jane said gently. "It might not be what it was, but it'll be alright. You've just got to take it day by day. Remember to breathe."

"It's what the Doctor would want."

"It is, but that's not why. You have to stop worrying about what the Doctor would want and start doing things for yourself. You're holding on to something that's gone, same as Lilah was. It's time to take steps toward moving on. Live the life you want, not the one the Doctor stuck you in."

Ginger had to step back - all this physical touch was getting a bit overwhelming. She nodded. "I'll try."

"Good," she smiled. "That's all we can do, really. Just try. But you don't have to do this alone. We'll be here every step of the way to help you. Now. He's giving you a lift too?"

She nodded. "I was hoping you could chaperone?"

"Anything you need. But I need to go finish packing and say goodbye to my daughter. You'll be alright here?"

"Yeah," Ginger said. "Thanks."

Sarah Jane smiled and began making her way up the stairs. Ginger watched the pendulum on the ceiling.

"Remarkable design," Cupid mused. "So many timekeeping devices."

"It's fascinating," Ginger agreed. "And how are you holding up?"

"What do you mean?"

"You saw me die today," she said. "I assume not for the first time, but-"

"It never gets any easier," he nodded. "You'd know that better than most."

"That looked like a warning. Like a countdown."

"Why do you say that?"

"Why do you think? You know, it's funny. I had the same thing in the dream you gave me. There were all these clocks and they kept saying things that weren't the time. Stuff like 'time's running out' and 'time's up'. You know, clever things. But it would never be just the time. Except once. I saw a glimpse of the clock..."

"And what did it say?"

"12: 59."

Cupid found himself holding his breath. "And what is 12:59?"

She looked at him properly. "Don't you know?" she asked matter of factly. "That's the end of the universe."

Cupid tried to think of a way to respond, but the Doctor arrived at that moment. "Everyone ready to go?" the Doctor asked.

Ginger smiled. "Yep. No time like the present."

But Alex had other ideas. She rushed to the top of the stairs and glared at Ginger. "Thought you were just gonna leave without saying goodbye?"

"That was the plan," Ginger admitted. "I figured you must be exhausted with all the emotions tonight, so I'll see you when you get back to London."

"That's not gonna work for me," Alex said. She came down to the foot of the stairs. She waved the others off. "I've already said goodbye to you lot. You can go on ahead."

"You sure?" the Doctor said.

"Yeah."

"Alright," he replied. "See you soon."

"I'd better."

Sarah Jane gave Alex one more hug. "Come visit me soon, will you?"

"As soon as possible," she agreed. "Goodnight, mum."

"I guess I'd better go check on the Red Herring," Cupid said. "Goodnight, you two."

They left and Alex turned to Ginger. "You alright?"

"I'm fine," she said. "Really. I'll be good."

"I believe you," Alex said. "I guess whatever Cupid gave you did wonders."

"From what I understand, it just helped my mind work it out."

"Work what out?"

"The issues I was having. The splitting. I was holding onto a past that didn't exist the way I pretend it did. It wasn't good for either of us. I was punishing him because I was afraid. And I guess it made me realize..."

"Realize what?"

Ginger sighed. "I don't know why it has to be so hard to tell him this. But Doppelginger was right. I _have_ loved him this whole time. I loved him from the first moment we met."

Alex smiled kindly and patted her on the shoulder. "And you say you're past rewriting history? It's a sweet idea, but don't sell yourself short."

Ginger was startled by this statement. "I'm not-"

"You are," Alex nodded. "I'm an empath, remember? I know these things."

Ginger crossed her arms. "If you know these things, then why are things always so muddled with the girls you date? I see you've not made a move on Nova yet."

Alex smiled. "You're lashing out at me. That's alright. That means I'm getting through to you. But what's up with me and Nova is my own business. Goodnight, Ginger."

Alex began ascending the stairs, leaving Ginger to contemplate what she'd said.

...

Ginger returned to the TARDIS and smiled as it whirred at her. "Good to see you too," she said. "Long night."

"I'll pop you home first, Sarah Jane," the Doctor said. "You're closest."

"Not that that matters," she smiled. "And it's really alright if you'd rather take Ginger home first..." She remembered how Ginger had asked for a chaperone.

Ginger smiled at her. "It's fine, really. Don't worry about me."

Ginger watched as he began setting his course. His mannerisms were still very much the same. He was very deliberate, but showy when it came to flying the TARDIS. She didn't know how she hadn't noticed that before. She'd been so set on the ways he was different that she hadn't let herself realize how much he was still the same.

...

The Doctor dropped Sarah Jane off in her back garden. She hugged him.

"Don't be a stranger," she said.

"I'll do my best," he assured her.

...

He dropped Ginger off next.

"Here you go," he said. "Your stop."

Ginger didn't move from her spot near the console. "Where will you go next?" she asked.

He shrugged. "Who knows? That's the exciting bit, isn't it? Could go anywhere! Do anything!"

She looked down and smiled. "Yeah, that's what I always liked about it." She crossed her arms and leaned against the console when she finally looked at him. "This is the bit where you ask me to go with you, isn't it? Just a quick trip, right? Nobody will ever have to know I'm gone."

"Normally, yes."

"And I just jump at the chance. Because life on Earth's so boring, it's making me sick, right? So of course I'd go anywhere with you."

"That would be the hope."

"But one quick trip turns into ten. Then fifteen."

"That is what seems to happen."

"Then next thing I know, we both have to admit that you never really intended to take me back. And I have to admit I never would've let you."

"That is our pattern."

"Yeah. Which is why you're not asking me."

"Yeah. You alright?"

She laughed, but it wasn't really a laugh. It was more of an exhale. Something between a sigh and a laugh. "No. Not really. Not ever. But I'll be fine. Will you?"

"You know me. I keep going."

"You do, don't you? How long have you been going this time?"

"Sorry?"

"When's the last time you slept?"

"You know Timelords don't need to sleep as much as humans."

"It's a good line. One that would work on any of these silly humans you keep around. Won't work on me, though. I've lived as human and Gallifreyan. And I know you. I know when you need to rest. Take the night off, would you? Just one night?"

He looked into her eyes and knew exactly what she was asking him. She wanted him to rest, sure. But that wasn't the main request. She needed her space, but she wanted him within shouting distance.

"If that's some kind of line, Laura Marling..." he teased.

She couldn't help but grin at that. "Shut up. And goodnight."

She began making her way to the door.

"You know, I think I'll park the TARDIS here for the night," he said. She stopped with her hands on the railing, halfway-down the steps. "You're right, I could use some rest. Been a while since I've slept."

She tried not to show her relief. "Whatever you want." She finished descending the steps and stopped just after opening the door to brandish a finger at him. "But you sleep alone. No funny business. Don't go getting any ideas. You stay out here."

He knew the most important part of that command had been the last sentence. "Whatever you say," he said, with a cheeky two-finger salute. 

That gesture reminded her so much of the man he'd once been that it immediately endeared him to her a little. She tried not to show it. She cringed. "Don't do that."

She shut the door behind her and was gone. The Doctor stood with his back to the console for a moment, wondering what he should do now.

...

Ginger tried to go to bed, she really did. She changed into her pajamas, got into bed, turned the light out, turned her music on, closed her eyes.

Then opened them again.

She thought about ceilings. Hers was some kind of plaster, she was pretty sure. Not that she knew anything at all about construction. A lot of the places she'd been in as a kid had had those popcorn ceilings. She wondered what that had been about. She decided to Google it.

Her phone light was bright in the darkened room. She squinted and turned down the brightness. She opened Google.

A notification popped up on screen.

_Get home safe?_

She smiled. Of course Alex would worry. _just going to bed now._ She anticipated the question that Alex couldn't think how to ask. _alone._

There was a short moment where no one said anything. Then Alex texted back.

_cool. talk to you tomorrow. you can call me tonight if you need to._

Ginger closed the window and opened Google again. 

_Well that's just great,_ she thought. _Now I've forgotten what I was gonna Google._

But she still couldn't sleep. Her brain was far too active. She started going through her phone contacts. She figured Jack might still be up. She scrolled down the short list of contacts.

_Alex...Clyde...Doctor..._

She stared at the contact for a moment, unable to scroll past it. 

She took a breath. _Bad idea,_ she thought. She turned off the phone. She tried to sleep.

She sighed and got out of bed.

...

Sometimes when she needed to think, she'd go all the way to the top floor of the building and let herself onto the roof through the fire escape. Something about being up there in the night air helped her think. 

She sat down near the edge and stared at the sky. It wasn't raining in England, so she had a small crescent moon to look at. She watched the few cars that dared to pass by this early in the morning. It was only about 4 am. Shops weren't even open yet.

Without even thinking about it, she found herself staring at her phone again.

...

The Doctor was lying in his hammock beneath the console room. He thought maybe he could have a quick few hours sleep then be on his way to collect Amy and Rory after breakfast. But he couldn't seem to sleep. He stared through the slats in the floor of the control room and swayed back and forth on the hammock. He was restless. He couldn't seem to shut his mind up.

His new phone buzzed. He thought it might be Alex, so he fished it out of his pocket.

It wasn't Alex.

It wasn't even a word.

### 👻

A new hope rose from within him, slowly pulling his lips into a smile. He texted back.

_Boo._

Ginger thought the full stop was oddly formal, but she let it slide. He wasn't a natural-born texter, after all. She smiled.

_i thought i told you to get some sleep_

He took a moment to formulate a response. 

_you're making that a little difficult_

_oh so it's all my fault then?_

_historically_

It occurred to them both simultaneously that this was dangerously close to flirting. They decided to back off a bit.

_so i guess there's no such thing as ghosts then? aliens and witches, sure...but no ghosts?_

_i think this is the closest we'll ever get to an actual ghost. she was real, she's just not a trapped soul. she's more of a sentient echo. she wasn't really her. in a way, the house provided a sort of stable time-loop for her._

_that took you a really long time to type_

_yeah well i'm all thumbs. i keep mispelling things and it takes me forever to find punctuation on this thing_

_let me help you then_

The Doctor felt a brief moment of panic as he saw the notification pop up on his screen. She was calling him. He wanted to hear her voice so badly, but answering the phone seemed like an impossible task. What are you even supposed to say?

He cleared his throat and picked up. "Am I getting a call from beyond the grave?"

She smiled and instantly relaxed at the sound of his voice. It was so different from the one that used to give her comfort, but it was still him. She could feel it now that she wasn't being stubborn about it. "I'm trying to reach a police telephone box, but if I've got the wrong number-"

"I imagine you have, yeah," he said. "No police here. But maybe I can help you. What do you need?"

"Oh I dunno. Someone to talk to, maybe? Getting very bored and restless tonight."

"I know what that's like. Been feeling that a bit myself. I can stay on the line with you if you think that'll help."

"It might, yeah."

"So what would you like to talk about?"

"I dunno. Not usually one for talking, me. Tell me about yourself. What have you been up to?"

"Up to a lot, usually. I've been traveling."

"Sounds nice. Meet any interesting people?"

"A few. There was a painter and some lizard people - oh and vampires."

"What, like real vampires? You putting me on?"

"No, I wouldn't lie to you about that. And sort of real, I mean, not in the way you think."

"Like Elizabeth Bathory again?"

"Sort of more...fish-like."

"Wicked. Say, not to be too bold, but do you want to come up here and tell me all about it?"

He wanted to, but he hesitated. "I don't know if that's a good idea."

"What harm could it do? I promise to keep my hands to myself. Might just be good to have the company."

Something about her tone made him believe her. " _Up_ there, you said? _Up_?" He jumped from his hammock and put on his coat.

"Yeah, that's what I said."

"Not _over_ here. Usually the operative word is _over."_

"That is generally how English works."

"But you said _up,"_ he said as he rushed toward the door. "You're _very_ deliberate with your language - you never leave a thing to chance. You live on the ground floor. So if you said _up_ and not _over."_

He threw open the TARDIS doors and locked eyes with Ginger, who was looking down at him from the roof of her building. He grinned at her. She grinned back and gave him a wave. He returned it.

"So you coming up or what?" she asked. He started to turn, but she stopped him. "Ah-ah-ah. Not with the TARDIS. If I have to do this the human way, so do you."

He turned back to implore her with his eyes to reconsider. She just looked at him as if she'd completely made up her mind. 

"You know, I'm meant to be resting," he complained.

"And when has that ever stopped you?" she asked. "Fire escape's 'round the alley there."

He spotted the rickety metal stairwell. "You know, I'm not as young as I used to be."

"Not even the young like stairs. C'mon. This is your penance. Make a grand dramatic gesture."

...

He found his way to the roof, where Ginger was waiting. She didn't turn to look at him when he arrived, but he somehow knew that she knew he was there. He moved to sit next to her.

"Can you hear me now?" he said into the phone.

She smiled. "Loud and clear."

He gestured to their phones. "So do we still need these, then?" 

"Yeah. They're for emotional distance."

"Ah."

She looked at him properly. "Alright, fine. I guess we don't need them." She turned hers off and put it in her pocket. "As a gesture of good will."

"Is that a new shirt?" he asked.

She looked down at her black top that said 'witch please' in green letters with a witch flying over them. "Yeah."

He saw that she was wearing the pajama pants with the ufos on them. "Some things never change, though."

She smiled in spite of herself. "Yeah."

"We're up on the roof!" he said, patting the concrete below him. "I like a good roof, me. Should've guessed I'd find you up here. It's very you."

"Don't even think about 'The Epic Moon' at a time like this-"

"I wasn't!" he protested. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Roswell! I was just thinking about how you have a history of climbing onto roofs. Sitting up here under the stars, waiting for someone to come take you away."

"I wasn't waiting this time," she said. "Honestly, I wasn't. I just needed to breathe. Sometimes it's easier to breathe when you're not so close to the ground. Everything down there is so tightly packed together. There's no room. But up here..."

He nodded. "Under the Cheshire Cat moon..."

Ginger looked at the moon incredulously. "I don't know what the moon has to be grinning about, honestly. It's not like things are going so well down here."

"But we're getting back to normal, at least," he insisted. "I mean this is very us. It always seems to be you and me and the October sky. I know I've changed-"

She shook her head. "No. I mean, yeah, you have. Obviously. But I've been too harsh on you. I completely split. You just don't understand..."

"I'm beginning to. What you said about how it feels to be stuck in the same routine day after day, agonizing about the unknown...I wouldn't be able to take it. And it was cruel to me not to consider that as a consequence of what I was putting you through. You'd move heaven and earth just to know for sure. And I put you down in the middle of a quarantine block."

"A what?"

He looked at her apologetically. "I'm so sorry, I thought it would be safer for you. You and Alex have the universal vaccinations, but there is a quarantine mandate on Earth from late 2019 into 2023. There's a contagion that can't be risked spreading to other parts of the galaxy. I knew there'd be very little alien activity so I knew you would be safe. But I forgot that when you get bored, you go a little..."

"Insane?"

"Not the word I was going to use."

"What other word is there? But I get it, I do. As much as I resent it. You're just trying to protect me again. You stick me somewhere you don't have to think about me-"

"But I did think about you. Every day. Constantly. There were times when my new companion would say or do something and I'd just...You and she are very similar in a lot of ways, but also completely and totally different. But the ways you are similar...Sometimes it completely shatters me. And her life didn't make sense. I needed it to make sense before I brought you or Alex into it. But believe me, I see your ghost everywhere all the time. I've missed you. It's been so hard to stay away."

She looked away, but despite her best efforts wasn't able to keep herself from crying. The tears were silent and she was evidently furious about their existence, so he didn't reach for her.

"I'm sorry," he said. "What did I do?"

"I thought you were dead," she said softly. "I wouldn't let myself believe it for the longest time, but during the wake, I just...I gave up. I broke. I've seen you die so many times, but this was the first time I thought you were dead for more than a second. I thought I'd never see you again. And I'd never know why. It could be all my fault for all I'd ever know. Maybe you'd suffered alone out there in the dark and there was something I could've done..." Her voice broke. "It was worse than magnets. Worse than dying."

His hearts ached for her and all he wanted to do was comfort her. But he didn't know how. "Can I ask you something? And if it hurts too much, you can just tell me and I'll drop it."

"You can ask me anything. There are no secrets. Not from you."

He considered how best to ask this question, one that had weighed heavily on his mind for quite some time. "You've never talked about the ways I died. When Doppelginger kept rebooting me. I just wanted to know..."

"You died protecting me most of the time," she said. "The longest we made it on a reboot was two weeks. We'd made it a week and I was starting to calm down when I started getting odd messages. I wasn't allowed to tell you about them or I was told you'd be killed. I had to do everything they said or..."

"And what did they say?"

"I ran little errands. Honestly I was so scared that they were gonna want me to kill someone for you."

"And you would've."

"Why do you say that like it's a given?"

"Isn't it? Unless it was Alex or Jack or Sarah Jane or Cupid, I can't imagine you hesitating."

"You got suspicious in that one," she admitted. "You knew something was up with me, but you did that infuriating thing where you wait for me to say it and assure me I can tell you when I'm comfortable. And of course I couldn't say a word. I'd just have an odd request for a planet to go to where I'd deliver something important, then I'd come back. It was agonizing. You figured out about the transmissions and confronted me, told me you'd help get me out and everything would be fine. And I believed you. Or wanted to, anyway. I still didn't tell you about the reboots because I thought you'd think I was mad...It was easier to just believe someone was after us. I thought we'd made it out, gotten successfully beyond range. I went out to pick up milkshakes for us. We were on the phone at the time. You said everything was fine in there. You were making us a little metal cat, sort of a K-9 model for me. They waited until I was right where I could see it then blew up the TARDIS with you still inside. I woke up right back where I always started."

"And you never ever once tried to tell me about the time loops? Why not use our shared connection to communicate that to me?"

She opened her mouth then closed it again. "I honestly never even considered that option. But I did try to tell you in several reboots. You did that thing where you try to calm me down and examine all the options logically. You'd always be willing to listen and believe me - maybe sometimes you'd be intrigued by the possibility of a stable time loop with us caught in the middle - but it was always something you had trouble believing. It was only during the last one that I remembered we had that code phrase." She closed her eyes and shook her head. "It was just horrible. Over and over and over and over...And there was never anything I could do. Everything I did always made it worse. I've seen all the ways you could suffer. So when you disappeared this time, of course my mind went over those timelines over and over and over again...You're just not allowed to die, you're just not..."

"Oh I wouldn't dream of it," he assured her.

"I mean it."

"So do I," he said. "But, if it means anything, I promise if do die one day, I'll come back and haunt you."

She turned to look at him. "You'd better! I'm going to be so angry with you if you don't!"

"I will condemn myself to wander this universe for all eternity for you. I'll be the first real ghost, but only for you."

They looked at each other for a long moment before he recognized a familiar flicker behind her eyes. Her lips began trembling and she looked away, focusing instead on the half-moon. He couldn't help but grin. He knew that look. She was trying very hard not to laugh. It wasn't working. She crumbled within minutes into the kind of breathy giggles that come from disbelief and turn into something a little more nostalgic along the way. She glanced at him. He was contemplating her and chuckling as well.

"You'd fuckin' better," she grinned. "I'm holding you to that. You have no idea the kind of grief you'll catch from me..."

This felt right. The air was cleared and they could breathe again.

"Grief," he said. "Interesting word. I assume you know the origin?"

"Root word means heavy," she nodded. "Which it is. It's _very_ heavy. I've never carried something with that much weight." She turned her gaze back on the moon as she considered the implications. "Which I suppose is really the stricter translation - weighty, not heavy. You know it comes from the same root word as gravity?"

She wasn't looking at him, so she couldn't see the way his eyes almost glowed with fondness as he watched her thought process unfold. "I didn't," he admitted.

She nodded. "Well it does. _Gravis_. There's a root word for us if I ever heard one. That feeling of being pulled back together time and again, mourning something that never quite happened the way we pretend it did. We are held together by the gravity of our grief. But did you know 'morning' and 'mourning' actually have no common root word? You'd think they do, since you wake in the morning and go to a wake when you're mourning. But of course then it gets messy because we call it a wake because Celts used to have vigils over their dead til they were buried. They were awake, so it was a wake."

"And why did Celts watch over their dead?" the Doctor asked. "I assume there was a purpose to that?"

The corner of her mouth turned upwards with amusement when she faced him again. "Well you've gotta make sure they're dead, don't'cha? Not just for the obvious zombie and vampire reasons, but people didn't have equipment to see if maybe they're in a coma. People were waking up in graves all the time because people didn't wait long enough before burying them. Wakes are important. Give you just enough time to make sure they're really..."

He could see that she was having the same thought he was. "...Dead?" he finished for her.

"Yeah," she said. "Wakes are dead useful for that. Next time I'm not gonna wait six months, though. I'm putting you in a little box with a little bell and you can give it a little ring when you decide you're up to it."

"Sounds fair," he grinned.

"Why do you ask?"

"About what?"

"The root word of grief."

"Oh. I was going to say that grief is an interesting word for you to choose there, but if there's anyone I can imagine literally catching grief from, it would be you. Can I ask you something else?"

"Is it gonna be dead depressing?"

"Potentially."

"Go ahead, then."

"What did Cupid's medicine do to you?"

"Oh," she said quietly. "Well...I mean, it sort of, uh...It was sort of like a dream world?"

"I know the kind of dreams you tend to have," he said. "Was this more screaming nightmare dimension or wackadoodle musical number?"

"Neither," she smiled. "It was sort of...us. As we were. Before."

"...Oh. What were we, uh..."

"I was in bed and we were naked. But it was the after part. Nothing smutty. I was kinda freaked out, to be honest."

"Why?"

"Because I knew you couldn't be you. I had the clear memory of everything that had happened up to the wake. But everyone kept telling me that I had it wrong. You didn't know who Alex was, Jack and Sarah Jane didn't know me...All I had was this knowledge that things weren't as they were supposed to be. Even as I wanted them to be _so_ badly. You know, it's funny. I had the opposite problem with him as I did with you. With you, I knew the moment you spoke that you were who you are even though your face and voice was so different. But with the Dream Doctor, it was like I knew deep down that he wasn't real the whole time, but he looked and sounded the way I wanted him to so I tried to convince myself I was wrong."

"So you just, what? Jumped right into this Dream Doctor's arms? Tearful reunion?"

She smiled sadly. "You know me better than that. I was terrible to him at first. I guess that's my pattern. I'm always so suspicious and angry and I take it out on the new Doctor. I did it to him, I've been doing it to you - hell, I even did that to you for months when we first met. I never handle it well. I'm so sorry. I don't know why you're always so patient with me. I don't deserve it."

"Maybe that's something we need to work on," he said. "But let's back up a bit - you said this dream didn't get smutty?"

She smiled. "That's your takeaway from this?"

"Mostly because you looked away briefly the way you do when you're lying to preserve your dignity."

She glared at him. "Alright, _fine_ there was some, uh, passion at one point, I guess you could say."

He grinned. "I knew it. You dream about me."

"Shut _up_ -"

"We're in your head getting _passionate_ -"

"It's only been this one time, I swear," she said. "Besides, it was sort of weird and depressing. I wouldn't take that as so much of a compliment."

"But you came back. Even with all that you wanted inside your head, you still came back."

"I did," she admitted.

"Why?" he asked. He couldn't figure out why that felt like a dangerous question.

"Does it really need saying?"

"Maybe."

"You really want to know?"

"Depends what the answer is."

She cursed her hearts for beating so loudly. Here it was. The moment. She couldn't work out why she felt so panic-stricken or why she suddenly felt as if she was overheating.

"Well," she said slowly. "If you really want to know...I came back because...Doctor, I..."

One moment she was there, her red hair glistening in the light of the moon and her green eyes boring into his with an intensity beyond even what was usual for her. The next moment she was gone. Inexplicably, impossibly, and half-way through a sentence, Ginger Roswell simply ceased to be on that rooftop with him. She flickered away as a holographic image might, leaving him staring into the empty space she left behind. It took him a moment to understand what had happened. Then another to react with a single word, one that he used to use much more frequently in situations such as this.

"What?"


	20. Up All Night

"Ginger?"

The Doctor sprang into action immediately, allowing his muscle memory to take over even as his mind struggled to catch up. He pointed his sonic screwdriver at the spot where Ginger had been sitting and did a full scan. The results didn't make it make any more sense. He needed outside help.

...

The sun rose on Turner Manor, and Alex awoke to find Jack and Nova making breakfast.

"Hey don't look at me," Nova said. "It was his idea. Lucky the kitchen was still stocked."

"When does your buyer get here?" Alex asked.

"About an hour," she replied. "But..."

Alex raised her eyebrows. "But what?"

Nova sighed. "Alright, you'll tell me if I've lost it, won't you? Because this is something I thought I'd never say."

"What is it?"

"I hate this place," Nova said. "I do. For so many reasons. But, as someone who likes to tinker a bit, I'm fascinated by it now. I'm wondering if I shouldn't keep it. If for no other reason than I can study it a bit more and keep it from falling into unsuspecting hands. I mean, the Doctor technically kept the machine running, just on low power. It could theoretically reactivate at some point and really mess people up. But I know what this is and how to handle it - or I will, with a bit of study."

"I think it's a good idea," said Alex. "I don't think people are ready for this house to go on the market."

"It's a shame to let so many rooms go to waste, though," Nova mused. "I might try to give away rooms to people who need them, if I can figure out a model for it. I was actually hoping I could talk to that therapy robot of yours about that. Maybe with some modifications to the design, we can help people who need a bit of closure after a sudden death. We'd have to properly screen candidates and make sure they're properly emotionally prepared, but maybe this place can do some good."

"Maybe it can," said Jack. "We'll have to see what Thea thinks."

"Will you be staying in Wales permanently then?" asked Alex. "I mean, if you're keeping this place?"

Nova gave her a funny look. "No, I like London far too much to stick myself here, thanks."

Alex felt oddly pleased by that, but she hardly had time to react when she heard a familiar noise from outside.

"What's that?" Nova asked.

"That's just Dad," Alex said fondly. "He says he's leaving, but he's back a few hours later like nothing happened."

"You'd better go let him in," Jack said. "I'll finish these eggs."

Alex jabbed a finger at him. "You'd better finish _making_ those eggs. If I come back and you've finished _eating_ these eggs, we're gonna have words."

"Yeah, yeah," he said with a smile.

Alex managed to open the front door just before the Doctor reached it. "Hello, stranger," she grinned. Then she was hit with a full dose of his emotional state. "What happened? What's wrong?" Then she realized there was only one thing that could make him feel this particular way. "Where's Ginger?"

It wasn't that the Doctor didn't care for anything else in the universe quite as much as Ginger, it was that his emotions pertaining to her were always heightened and complicated in a way that his feelings for other people usually weren't. Alex had learned by now to be able to tell when the Doctor was worrying about Ginger particularly.

"We don't have time," the Doctor said as he rushed past her into the main hall. "Get Thea. Tell her to meet me upstairs."

"Upstairs where?"

"In the pocket dimension."

...

The Doctor was able to make it upstairs without needing the Gingers because he'd installed an override the night before to allow him access. When he reached that floor, he marched over to the control panel and began taking readings.

Thea, Jack, Alex, and Nova soon joined him.

"Is there a problem?" Thea asked. "You appear to be experiencing heightened anxiety."

"Oh I appear to be, do I?" he grumbled under his breath. He raised his voice a bit to talk to her properly. "Get over here and help me find her."

"Who? We released everyone who was trapped in there."

"Ginger," he said. He glanced over his shoulder at Jack. "You should go. Check every room. Find her."

"I thought she left with you," Jack said.

"I thought so too, but I think we were tricked. She must still be here somewhere. We need to find her and shut off the part of the mechanism that was impersonating her. Is Cupid still here?"

"No," Thea replied. "He took off with the Red Herring and the Corsair last night."

"Get him back here. I know you have a way to contact him. He needs to know if something happens."

"I'll send him a signal," Thea agreed.

"Doctor, slow down," Alex said. 

"I can't slow down!" the Doctor said. "She said this was a trap, and I didn't listen to her! She could be hurt!"

"I only mean that you're not making sense," Alex said. "What actually happened? Make us understand."

"Yes," said a voice. "Make me understand why I've been summoned here."

The Doctor sighed with relief at the sound that voice. He knew its owner had answers. The trouble was getting him to spill them. "Cupid," he said. 

"She left with you," Cupid said. 

"You saw her leave?"

"I didn't," he admitted. "But I talked to her shortly before. We had an interesting conversation."

"About what?"

"Things that would be utterly incomprehensible to you."

"Who was the last person to speak to her at the house?"

Alex raised a hand. "I was."

"What did you talk about?"

Alex smiled kindly. "Stuff that's better if she says it herself."

"Did you actually see her get into the TARDIS?"

She shook her head. "I saw her leave the house."

"So she must've been snatched on the way."

"Snatched?" Cupid asked. "What do you mean snatched? Where is she?"

"I don't know."

"Alright, so we've established that no one saw her go into the TARDIS-" Alex began.

"Well, I mean, technically I saw it from my perspective," the Doctor said. "The door opened and I pretended not to notice. So maybe it wasn't on the way from the house." He groaned with frustration. "Why can't I _think_?"

"You're panicking under pressure," Thea said kindly. "That's not like you."

"It is," Cupid said. "When it comes to Ginger in uncertain peril, Doctors tend to display panic." He took a few steps toward the Doctor. "My dear boy, take a breath. You're no good to her in this state. Focus. What exactly happened?"

He did as Cupid said, but it didn't make him any calmer. "We were on the roof-"

"The roof?" Alex said. "What on Earth were you doing on the roof?"

"Ginger loves roofs," Cupid explained. "She goes up there when she needs to think."

"We were talking," the Doctor explained. "She got half-way through a sentence and then she just..."

"She just what?"

"Disappeared. Into thin air."

"You blinked and she was gone?" Jack asked.

"No, she faded before my eyes. Like a hologram."

"So you came back here," Jack said. 

"Did you trace a signal back here?" Cupid asked. "Something that we can follow?"

The Doctor shook his head. "No. I did scans, but I didn't pick up anything to indicate what had happened. I thought maybe some sort of transmat at first, but there wasn't a trace." He kicked the wall in frustration. "It wasn't her, was it?"

"What do you mean?" Alex asked.

"She was apologizing a lot," the Doctor said. "Being actually vulnerable about her emotions. Forgiving me. So it wasn't her. Something was impersonating her, telling me what I want to hear. I should've known."

"Did you feel that it wasn't her?" Cupid asked. "Deep down?"

He shook his head. "No. Somehow it tricked me."

"That's impossible," Cupid said. "You'll always know her, barring some kind of extreme mental break or chemical high. What was she saying to you?"

"I don't know," he said. "I asked her why she came back instead of staying in the dream world. She got half-way through the thought before disappearing."

"You said you did a scan?"

"Yeah."

"Put aside what you were looking for or what amounts you think would be logical to accomplish that. Did you pick up anything even slightly out of the ordinary that you think is unimportant so are choosing to ignore?"

"I don't know-"

"Think. Time is of the essence."

He took a breath and considered this. "Artron energy. Only trace amounts. It was rapidly degrading by the time I picked it up, so it wasn't enough to have caused this."

Cupid nodded. "That's because it wasn't the cause. It was the biproduct. We have to leave immediately."

"Someone should stay behind to make sure she's not here-"

"She isn't," Cupid insisted. "This has nothing to do with the house. This is about her. She wasn't taken or trapped or impersonated. If I'm right, she was really with you on that rooftop right up until the moment she wasn't."

"You know something," the Doctor said. "Tell me what it is."

Cupid considered how much he ought to say. "Ginger still has trace amounts of that medication in her system. Her synapses are still misfiring. If she somehow activated her fight-or-flight, she could've done this to herself."

The Doctor's expression was dangerous. He wasn't even close to playing games with this one. "How?"

"That's not important right now," Cupid said. "What _is_ important is finding out where she went."

"So we go to local haunts?" Jack asked.

"Or places we know she feels safe?" Alex added. "We can cover more ground if we split up to look."

"It's a good idea," Cupid said. "And I'd appreciate your help however you can give it. But there's no guarantee that she's anywhere."

"What does that mean?" the Doctor asked in a low voice.

"Don't worry," Cupid said in a tone that betrayed his own worry. "She couldn't've gone anywhere that couldn't sustain her. Her survival instinct would prevent her from, say, ending up in deep space or the middle of the ocean. There's also a nearly zero percent chance that she's ended up on a moving vehicle of any kind."

"Which narrows it down to...?"

Cupid looked at him sadly. "I'm afraid it doesn't narrow it down at all. There are infinite times and places she could be. And that's not our only problem. There's no guarantee that she's even in our universe."

...

Ginger remembered his eyes and how they seemed to glow in the moonlight. 

"Doctor," she said slowly as her hearts threatened to break free from their cage. "I..." 

She took a breath to try to make the words come easier, but the motion of pulling air into her lungs seemed to pull her backwards as well. She felt at first like a tether was pulling her back through sinking sand. Slowly at first. Then the motion got faster as her mind caught up with the sensation. She felt as though the universe was passing through her as she passed through it. The feeling was like water flowing through a translucent fabric, though she wasn't certain if she was the water or if the universe was. Maybe both. Maybe neither. She recalled feeling this once before when Cupid had transported her, except it had felt more instantaneous then. Or perhaps then she had been prepared. Or even more likely, she'd not been paying attention.

Her breath shot from her as she reached the other side, her boots slipping and sliding in the white hot sand. She struggled to stand upright and held up a hand to shield her eyes from the sudden blinding glare of sunlight. She tried to orient herself. She could hear a roar, one that she could only associate with one thing. And sure enough, a second after she thought it, the tide rose up to wind around her ankles like a purring cat. She could smell the salt air and hear the birds. 

She lost her footing and tumbled to the wet sand, her glasses slipped off her face and she swore loudly as she scrambled to find them. The edge of the ocean wasn't a very good place to lose your glasses. She reasoned she only had a few moments before the sea claimed them as another treasure, and she didn't exactly have an extra pair with her.

"Oh my god," said the voice of a young woman. "Are you alright? You just came out of nowhere."

But Ginger was disoriented and a little bit panicked, which meant she was suspicious. "Don't come any closer!" she shouted. "I'm warning you!"

The young woman stopped in her tracks and Ginger could just make out a pair of black lace-up boots. "Do you need help?" the woman asked. "Just tell me what to do."

 _Definitely English_ , Ginger noted. That must be a good sign. The accent even sounded local. She must've not been taken far.

"Now I don't know what you're playing at," Ginger said as she continued trying to locate her glasses. "But you need to tell me what's going on _right now_ because I'm really not in the mood for a transmat at the moment, thank you very much. I was in the middle of a _very important_ conversation and anyone who gets in my way right now will be..." She blinked rapidly as she realized one of her migraines was coming on. "...Will be..." She suddenly felt very weak and dizzy. Words were sliding through her hands like water. "Sorry, what's the word I'm looking for?" She located a shell. "Shoes? Ships? Sealing wax? Cabbages and kings?" She shook her head. "No, those words aren't right, they don't fit...What was I saying?"

The young woman waited a moment before speaking. "Did you by any chance drink any of the seawater?"

"Why?" Ginger asked. "Is it poisonous? Is the water on this planet filled with some sort of alien brain rot?"

"It's not poisonous, it's just that drinking too much seawater makes sailors go a bit mad. And what do you mean, this planet? We're on Earth."

"Oh. Right. Yeah. Thought we might be. You sound local."

"You don't."

She tried to focus on what she was doing. "And why the sea is boiling hot..." she muttered. "These words are out of order. They're important, but I can't remember why."

"They're Alice in Wonderland," said another voice. An older woman, likely middle aged. Also sounded local. "Remember, we had the Disney one when you were a kid?"

"That's right," whispered the other woman. "But what's she doing talking about Alice in Wonderland? Where'd she come from?"

A pair of gray trainers came into sight and a hand reached down to snatch something from the sand. "Are these yours?" said a strangely familiar voice.

She was confused and disoriented, so for a moment she refused to let herself understand what she was feeling as she took the glasses from his hand. "I remember now..." she said, as she placed the glasses on her head and peered up into the blue sky. "The sun was shining on the sea, shining with all his might..." She started to get to her feet. "And this was odd because it was the middle of the night..." 

She stumbled and the man grabbed her to keep her steady. Her usual instinct would be to pull away, but she didn't.

"Don't try to stand up," the man cautioned. 

Ginger looked first at the two women. Blonde, both of them. The younger was wearing a blue jacket over a sort of pinkish shirt. Ginger then turned her gaze on the man. She swallowed hard. "You've got to be kidding me. That's just not fair! You?"

She collapsed instantly, the weight it all causing her to instantly lose consciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here we are lmao. Where in the world - or off the world - is Ginger? I feel like I've hinted pretty hard, but leave your theories down below. I'll see you again to confirm your suspicions the week after Christmas, when I'll have 3 new chapters (2 of which will be out before the New Year). I'm just taking a break over the holidays this year and refusing to acknowledge them (due to well documented religious trauma). See you soon!


	21. My Fairweather Friend

"We'll split into teams," Jack said. "Thea, you're with me, since apparently you can teleport. Alex, I suggest we get you to Sarah Jane - we could use support from Mr. Smith."

"I'll take Cupid," the Doctor said.

"Actually," Cupid said. "I think I should find the Corsair. She and the Red Herring and experts in the field of tracking Gingers."

"What should I do?" Nova asked.

They'd all forgotten she was there.

"Oh," Alex said awkwardly. "I dunno..."

"You don't need to do anything," Cupid assured her. "You're not part of this."

"I'd like to be," said Nova. "I don't understand what's going on, but if I can help in any way..."

Alex made a snap decision to trust her. "Alright," she said. "How about this? Jack, you go with the Doctor. Cupid, you go do whatever the hell it is that you want to do. Thea can come with me and Nova while we talk to Mum and Mr. Smith."

"Whatever we're doing, let's just do it," said the Doctor. "I don't like the thought of her out there alone any longer than she has to be." He turned to Thea. "Your protocol..."

"..Was activated the moment you alerted me to the problem," the android replied, her tone slightly more subdued than her usual chipper self. "I'm still running scans, but I haven't located any lifeform that matches her. I'll continue running the program continuously."

The Doctor watched her carefully. "You almost look concerned."

"I am," she replied. "She's my patient."

...

Sarah Jane smiled. "When I said you should come visit soon, I didn't think it would be _this_ soon. I'm glad you..." She saw Alex's face. "What is it? What happened?"

Alex was normally pretty good at hiding her worry, but something about this whole situation was breaking through her usual defenses. "It's Ginger. She's gone missing."

"Again?" Sarah Jane asked. "Don't tell me she's run off again. I'm sure she'll turn up soon, when she wants to be found."

"No, she didn't run off," Alex said. "I wasn't there, but the Doctor said she disappeared into thin air right in front of him."

Her brow furrowed. "Some sort of transmat?"

"Except there wasn't a beam or any traceable evidence," Alex said. "Cupid said it might be something else. Some sort of accident..."

She tilted her head and looked at her daughter closely. "What is it that you're not telling me?"

Alex took a breath. "He said she might've done it to herself. Like a defense mechanism. But that doesn't make any sense..."

"Did he explain how?"

She shook her head. "I don't understand it."

"You don't have to," she said kindly. She glanced past Alex. "Nova, dear, it's good to see you."

"I'd like to help," Nova said. "If I can."

"Can you make tea?"

Nova nodded.

"Alright. Stuff's in the cabinet there. I assume you came here for Mr. Smith, so Alex and I will be upstairs when it's ready."

...

"Mr. Smith, I need you," Alex said.

The usual fanfare began as the wall split open.

"Alex," Mr. Smith said. "To what do I owe the unexpected visit?"

"Yeah, yeah," she said dismissively. "We'll have plenty of time later to tease me for not visiting enough. We have more pressing concerns."

"We always seem to," he said neutrally. 

"Ginger's gone missing," Alex said. "We need you to find her."

"Where was she last seen?"

"Top floor of my building last night. Preliminary data shows Artron energy at the scene, but it was in scarce amounts and degraded right after. She disappeared from the roof like a hologram disappearing right in front of the Doctor's eyes. That's all we know." 

This was the Torchwood training coming out. From the time she was old enough to talk, she'd been taught to speak clearly and concisely and give all the data whenever a crisis occurred. She was trained to know how to give a full report, even without realizing that's what she was doing.

"I'll run a full scan," Mr. Smith said. "Check for wormhole activity or any form of particle matter transmission in the area."

"I'm already on that," Thea announced. "But I'm happy to compare data. I think we should also check surveillance cameras and radio transmissions from the time of her departure."

Mr. Smith didn't instantly respond. "I'm sorry, I don't think we've been officially introduced, Miss..."

"Thea," she said. "I take it you're Mr. Smith. I heard you were aiding Ginger in her attempts to locate the Doctor over the past month. I'm only sorry we didn't have a chance to meet under better circumstances."

"You are an android, Miss Thea?"

"Just Thea, thank you. And I am. I'm sure you've located all my weapons systems in the scan you're doing."

Sarah Jane raised her eyebrows as she glanced at Alex and mouthed: _All_?

"They're...impressive," Mr. Smith admitted.

"I assure you, I'm no threat to you or this compound," Thea replied. "My mission imperative is to protect my charges. I'd like to locate this one as soon as possible."

"I'd be happy to collaborate with you on this matter," Mr. Smith replied. "It would be helpful to be able to compare notes with someone with such an impressively designed core processor. Though I can't quite place the design..."

She smiled cryptically. "It's a Doctor original. But you're something else entirely, aren't you? Everyone talks of Mr. Smith the supercomputer, but no one mentioned even once that you're a Xylok."

"Is that a problem?"

"Only if your purpose conflicts with mine."

"I assure you," he replied. "We are firmly on the same side."

"Good," Thea replied as she pulled a chair up in front of Mr. Smith. "Then let's get to work."

"My pleasure."

...

Cupid approached from the front so the Red Herring would have a chance to spot him before he reached her. It was always safest not to startle her.

She sighed. "What? Already? What crisis is it this time? Because we're really rather busy-"

"It's Ginger," he explained.

"It always is-"

"She's gone missing."

"Yeah, we do that-"

"She disappeared into thin air."

This stopped her in her tracks. "You mean...?"

He nodded. "You have to help me find her. She could be anywhere."

"That's more your problem, isn't it? My mission here is to find the Queen and neutralize that threat. Unless your girl's a threat, I have bigger fish to fry-"

"She doesn't know!" he said desperately. "I never told her. I didn't think it would come up this soon. It was safer if she didn't know until I knew I had enough time to train her."

"So she did this on instinct." It was a flat statement. Comprehension was slowly dawning.

"That's my best guess."

"And she doesn't know anything?"

"At all. What would you think in that situation?"

"I'd think it was some sort of transmat," she said. "I'd think someone had grabbed me up for some reason. It would never even occur to me that..."

He could see that she understood. "You can see why this is so dangerous."

She nodded. "She'll be a danger to herself and others until we find her and talk her down. This could be critical. We should split up. Cover more ground."

"I'll leave myself open-"

"No," she said sharply. "You don't have to do that."

"You need to be able to find me if you find something."

"I'll be able to. But don't leave yourself open. We don't know if it's safe."

He looked at her closely and let himself remember how fond he was of all Gingers, even now. "I knew it," he said. "You still care about me."

"That's really beside the point now," she said. "Caring isn't logical and we need to focus on logic now."

"Right," he said. "Businesslike as always."

"We'll split up," she said. "She could be anywhere. I'll fill in the Corsair-"

"Fill me in on the way," said the Corsair as she joined them. "Though I have a feeling I know what this is about."

Cupid blinked. "You do?"

"Yeah," she replied. "You think I haven't been monitoring the scanner while I've been out? It's all over the news."

Cupid's heart felt like ice. "What has?"

...

Nova arrived in the attic with the tea. "Hey you guys? I think you might want to turn on the news."

"Why?" Sarah Jane asked. 

"Nova's right," Thea said. "Mr. Smith, can you bring up the broadcasts?"

"I was about to suggest the same thing," Mr. Smith replied.

The feed went live and Sarah Jane gasped.

"Oh my god," Alex said.

...

The Doctor felt his phone vibrate. "Alex?" he said into the speaker. "Did you find something?"

"Not what you're looking for," she said. "Dad, you need to look at the news."

She only called him 'Dad' when she was particularly emotional. This gave him enough pause to do as she said.

"This would be a cataclysmic event," a bespectacled scientist was explaining. "If used, this technology would easily wipe out the human race."

"What effects would we see if the Earth's atmosphere were to suddenly completely disappear?" the newscaster asked.

"Without the atmospheric shield protecting us, we'd have no protection from solar radiation. The temperature would rise dramatically and the oceans would boil before completely evaporating. Earth would no longer be hospitable to humanity."

"But presumably it would be to these invaders?"

"We have no other choice," the scientist said. "If anyone has any information that could help us meet the demands, we have to meet them. Now isn't the time for state secrets. If we don't locate and return their princess by tomorrow, they _will_ exterminate us to find her."

The Doctor was horrified. "Alex..." he said slowly into the phone.

"There was a transmission," Alex explained. "It was all over the web. Missing princess. Demands. You get the drill. It's been verified."

Jack had wasted no time and was bringing up scans around the Earth. "Hey Doctor, they're not kidding. There's a fleet of warships surrounding the Earth. We're easily outgunned."

"Can you identify a species?"

Thea motioned for Alex to give her the phone and she obliged. "Nerideen," Thea said solemnly. "Mr. Smith was helpful in verifying after my initial identification."

"Nerideen," the Doctor said. "Their planet is a desert wasteland. They're sodium-based life-forms. They can only survive on planets with lots of sun, but water is toxic to them." 

"So that's why they want to boil down our oceans," Sarah Jane said. They'd leave behind large salt deposits."

"I think it's safe to say that you should get back to Earth as soon as possible, Doc," Alex said nervously.

"He hasn't left yet," said Cupid as he let himself into the TARDIS.

"Cupid?" Jack said. "What are you doing here?"

"I heard about the situation," he said. "I came to make sure we properly address it."

"How do you mean?" the Doctor asked.

"We need the Doctor."

The Doctor raised his hand. "Hello! Right here!"

"Yes, but for how long? Your judgment is cloudy right now. You need to focus on the problem at hand."

The Doctor realized why he was saying this. "Which means giving up the search for Ginger." He shook his head. "No. Absolutely not. I won't abandon her like everyone's always done her whole life-"

"You're not abandoning her, you're doing the right thing!" Cupid said desperately. 

"That may be what you tell yourself to sleep at night, but it won't work for me," he said gravely. "I left her once to save her - I'm not leaving her again when she's probably in trouble! There are plenty of people on this problem already-"

"But none of them are you. You can get places in a TARDIS that they can't access. I'm not saying you can't have scans active in the background looking for Ginger, but this isn't a good time to make it your primary concern. It's not like you to knowingly leave the Earth undefended."

"I'm not!" he insisted. "I can do both! I have to find her! Who knows how long she's been missing-"

"You do. She disappeared before your eyes."

"I mean before that."

Cupid fought the urge to roll his eyes. "Don't tell me you're still struggling to believe that Ginger was with you on that rooftop."

The Doctor stared him down stubbornly. "The more I work it through in my head, the less it makes sense."

Cupid just looked at him for a moment. "Jack, take the phone," he said without looking at the human. "We'll only be gone a moment. Not that we have _time_ for this, but if it's going to be such a distraction we'll work the problem."

"Where are you going?" Jack asked as he took the phone.

But it was too late. Cupid took the Doctor's arm and teleported them out.

...

The Doctor tugged away as soon as they hit solid ground. "How are you able to do that?" he demanded. "Nothing should be able to teleport into or out of my TARDIS!"

"She likes me," Cupid said vaguely. "And that's not the problem."

The Doctor looked around and realized they were standing in Ginger's room. "We shouldn't be in here," he said. "She wouldn't like it."

Cupid raised his eyebrows. "So you haven't already looked here for clues? Love makes you sloppy. What do you see?"

The Doctor cast his eyes around. "A lava lamp, some books, her bag-"

"Exactly," Cupid said. "Her bag. She had her bag with her in Wales. She returned with it. But now it's here. She never goes anywhere without it. The fact that she left it behind means that she didn't expect to leave."

"That still doesn't mean it was her on the roof," he pointed out. "She could've disappeared after she got home."

Cupid was getting fed up with his stubbornness. "Alright, what is this?" he demanded. "What's this guilt about?"

"What?"

"This guilt that's clouding your judgment and making it impossible for you to focus. Why do you feel that way? Doctor, I need you to be honest with me right now because it's important. Did you kiss her?"

"What? No!" He was almost offended that Cupid would imply such a thing after all they'd been through.

"Did you sleep with her?"

"I just _said_ I didn't even kiss her!" he insisted. "Besides, if I had, I'd know for sure that she wasn't a hologram, wouldn't I?"

"So what is it then? Why do you feel so responsible?"

"Because you said it could be a fight or flight response and I don't want to think I could've caused it!"

"Obviously! But what could you have done to make her do that? What was it? Did you profess your undying love?"

"Not in so many words," he said.

"But you feel like you must've said the wrong thing and set her off," Cupid sighed. "I hate to be the one to tell you this, Doctor, but you have to let that feeling go. You are _not_ responsible for what happens to her."

"Really?" he said darkly. "Because you always act like I am."

"In some cases, sure, there's always room for improvement. But you can't hold yourself responsible every time she has a crisis. It's important right now that you save the Earth-"

"I won't abandon her-"

"You're not. You've got your best people on it. You lot aren't qualified to track down a Ginger. We are. We can do it faster if we don't have to worry about you, but you _have_ to trust us. You're needed here. Help your daughter save the world. Let me worry about mine."

The Doctor knew that Cupid was right, but it was really hard to shake the feeling that he could be doing more. "I'll leave the TARDIS, and Mr. Smith, and Thea running background scans in the meantime. Just in case."

"Good," Cupid said. "Let me, Cora, and the Red Herring handle the rest."


	22. Wanderlust

Ginger felt strange, like the world was lagging. She could hear something like the ticking of a clock, but it sounded wrong. It felt like she was caught between two streams - one going too fast, the other going too slow.

 _"Your father said it will take a while to get clearance to come for us."_ This woman's voice sounded distant. It echoed as if it was coming from a cave at the bottom of the ocean. _"Whoever she is, we can help her better when we're back in London."_

"No," she said. Her voice was rough, like sandpaper. "You can't move me...I can't go..."

 _"She's awake,_ _"_ said another female voice. 

_"It's alright, love,"_ said the first voice. Ginger could feel someone stroking her hair. _"We'll get you taken care of, don't you worry."_

"Don't touch me," Ginger spat. "I need to get back..."

 _"Back to where?"_ said the second voice. _"Where did you come from?"_

Her memories were disjointed. Fragments of time being pulled between the two streams. "Doctor..."

 _"They're bringing one with them,"_ said the first voice. _"Don't you worry..."_

_"You don't think she means...?"_

_"Rose, there's no telling what she means."_

Ginger's breathing slowed as comprehension filled her like ice water in her veins. "Rose?" She tried to focus as shapes and colors began to be evident to her. "Not...Rose Tyler?"

She could see the two blonde women exchange a worried glance.

"How do you know that name?" Rose asked.

"He told me," she said. "The Doctor..." She sat up sharply and looked around. Her eyes found the door, but it was who was standing there that was of more interest to her.

"Oh my god," Ginger whispered. "That's impossible."

...

**Several hours earlier**

"Hold on," Rose said. "This is the parallel universe, right?"

"You're back home," the Doctor said.

"And the walls of the world are closing again, now that the Reality Bomb never happened," Donna added. "It's dimensional retroclosure. See, I really get that stuff now."

Rose shook her head as she understood what he was trying to do. "No, but I spent all that time trying to find you. I'm not going back now."

"But you've got to," the Doctor said gravely. "Because we saved the universe, but at a cost. And the cost is him." He nodded at his metacrisis clone. "He destroyed the Daleks. He committed genocide. He's too dangerous to be left on his own."

This new Doctor rose quickly to anger. He resented the tone his other self was taking with him. "You made me!" he protested.

"Exactly," the Doctor said. "You were born in battle, full of blood and anger and revenge." He turned to Rose. "Remind you of someone? That's me, when we first met. And you made me better. Now you can do the same for him."

Rose was trying desperately to hold back tears. She couldn't believe he would do this. He couldn't just abandon her like this, after everything they'd gone through together. "But he's not you."

"He needs you," the Doctor said. "That's very me."

The Doctor was begging her to understand and accept this. He wasn't sure he was strong enough to keep at this if she protested for much longer.

"But it's better than that, though," Donna said. "Don't you see what he's trying to give you? Tell her. Go on."

Rose realized that Donna was addressing this new Doctor, so she turned to him. Evidently he knew exactly what the Doctor was trying to say. And why wouldn't he? He _was_ the Doctor, after all.

"I look like him and I think like him," this new Doctor said. "Same memories, same thoughts, same everything. Except I've only got one heart."

"Which means?" Rose asked.

"I'm part human," he said. "Specifically, the aging part. I'll grow old and never regenerate. I've only got one life, Rose Tyler. I could spend it with you, if you want."

A flicker of hope ignited in her heart as she understood the implications of this statement. "You'll grow old at the same time as me?"

"Together."

Rose stepped forward and put a hand on his chest. She could feel it. The one heart beat.

She heard the TARDIS whirr behind her and turned back to face the Doctor.

"We've got to go," the Doctor said. "This reality is sealing itself off forever."

He and Donna started to leave, but Rose ran after them.

"But it's still not right," she said desperately. "Because the Doctor's still you."

He stopped and looked at her. "And I'm him," the Doctor said.

But she had to be sure it was him. She had one question, one thing that had been weighing on her mind for years now. The answer to that question would determine everything.

"Alright," she said. "Both of you, answer me this. When I last stood on this beach, on the worst day of my life, what was the last thing you said to me?" Neither of them spoke. "Go on, say it."

The Doctor looked at her sadly. He knew this was his last chance, but he knew what she was doing. He couldn't say this out loud if it meant compromising her decision. But he couldn't lie to her either. He didn't want to hurt her, so he decided to tell the truth exactly as it happened.

"I said, Rose Tyler," he said.

She knew that he knew this wasn't what she was asking. "Yeah, and how was that sentence going to end?"

This was almost too difficult. But, he reasoned, the truth was far more difficult. It's why he hadn't finished the sentence the first time. "Does it need saying?"

She tried not to show her hurt, frustration, or desperation as she turned to the new Doctor. "And you, Doctor? What was the end of that sentence?"

This new Doctor leaned toward her, keeping himself out of earshot of the others. He wasn't one for grand declarations - this was for Rose and Rose only. "I love you," he whispered gently.

He stepped back and she just looked at him for a moment, her heart soaring with the confirmation of his real feelings for her, after all this time. She grabbed him and kissed him. By the time she heard the TARDIS door and realized that the Doctor and Donna had gone, it was too late. She broke away from her chosen Doctor and tried to run after the other, but only made it a few paces before the TARDIS disappeared. This new Doctor waited a moment before joining her and taking her hand. 

They looked at each other. There was so much unspoken in that look. They could have a whole life together, and they knew it. It was an almost impossible hope - one that _had_ been impossible until now. The Doctor wasn't sure what this new life would look like. Maybe it was the human DNA at work, but he felt ready to settle down.

 _Blimey,_ he thought to himself. _What am I supposed to be now that I'm human? Am I supposed to still have her call me Doctor? Would that be confusing? I mean, I am him! Or should I go native and call myself John? Or is it time to tell someone my real name? If I would tell anyone, I'd want it to be her._

He was concerned. He knew this was a big step for Rose. She'd made a decision. He just hoped she wouldn't regret it. He knew he'd have to convince her totally that he was the same person. It always took her a little time, but she'd get there.

"So what now?" she asked.

"I don't know," he admitted. "Not a lot to do in Norway, is there?" He knew that wasn't what she was asking. "We'll figure it out. Together."

She tried to think of something to say, but movement out of corner of her eye made her turn to the shoreline. She watched as a strange red-haired woman materialized out of thin air. Her black boots slipped in the sand, but she miraculously managed to keep herself upright. She put a hand in front of her face and squinted in the bright sunlight. She fell to the ground and her thick black glasses slid off her face. 

"Fuck," she spat in a thick Scottish accent. She scrambled to find her glasses.

Rose let go of the Doctor's hand and ran toward the woman. The new Doctor and Jackie followed close behind.

"Oh my god," Rose said. "Are you alright? You just came out of nowhere."

The woman motioned for them to keep back with one hand while continuing to search for her glasses with the other. "Don't come any closer!" she shouted. "I'm warning you!"

Rose did as she said and stopped in her tracks. She didn't know what this was. There could be something dangerous that she didn't know about. But this woman seemed to be in her pajamas and that fact made Rose think that perhaps she might not be so much of a threat. "Do you need help?" she asked. "Just tell me what to do."

"Now I don't know what you're playing at," the woman said as she continued trying to locate her glasses. "But you need to tell me what's going on _right now_ because I'm really not in the mood for a transmat at the moment, thank you very much. I was in the middle of a _very important_ conversation and anyone who gets in my way right now will be..." She blinked rapidly in a way that made Rose think she might be in pain. "...Will be...Sorry, what's the word I'm looking for?" She located a shell and held it in front of her face. "Shoes? Ships? Sealing wax? Cabbages and kings?"

The Doctor recognized those words as being from Alice in Wonderland. She was evidently confused. He had the thought that she could be injured.

The woman shook her head to clear it. "No, those words aren't right, they don't fit...What was I saying?"

Rose was stunned and didn't know what to say. There was something clearly wrong with this woman, but she couldn't tell what just by looking. She remembered where they were. "Did you by any chance drink any of the seawater?"

"Why?" she asked. "Is it poisonous? Is the water on this planet filled with some sort of alien brain rot?"

"It's not poisonous, it's just that drinking too much seawater makes sailors go a bit mad. And what do you mean, this planet? We're on Earth."

"Oh. Right. Yeah. Thought we might be. You sound local."

She almost thought she heard a note of mockery in that comment. "You don't."

The woman continued trying to find her glasses. "And why the sea is boiling hot..." she muttered. "These words are out of order. They're important, but I can't remember why."

"They're Alice in Wonderland," said Jackie. "Remember, we had the Disney one when you were a kid?"

"That's right," whispered Rose. "But what's she doing talking about Alice in Wonderland? Where'd she come from?"

The Doctor couldn't say how he knew that this stranger wasn't a threat, but he was absolutely sure he could trust her. He spotted her glasses near the shoreline and snatched them up before offering them out to her. It was a sort of peace offering. "Are these yours?" he asked.

She appeared stunned and disoriented as she slowly took the glasses from him. "I remember now..." she said, as she placed the glasses on her head and peered up into the blue sky. "The sun was shining on the sea, shining with all his might..." She started to get to her feet. "And this was odd because it was the middle of the night..." 

She stumbled and the Doctor grabbed her to keep her steady. "Don't try to stand up," he cautioned. 

The woman looked first at Rose, then at Jackie. She finally turned her eyes to the Doctor. She swallowed hard. "You've got to be kidding me. That's just not fair! You?"

She collapsed. The Doctor caught her mid-fall and lowered her safely to the ground.

"Oh my god," Rose said. "Is she alright?"

"Too bad I didn't get stranded with a sonic," the new Doctor muttered. "I'd like to do some scans, see if she has any internal damage..."

"There's the outpost near here," Jackie reminded Rose. "We should take her there."

"Right," Rose said. "The outpost."

"What outpost?" he asked. 

"Torchwood got one set up just there," Rose said, pointing at a small cottage on an outcropping overlooking the bay. "After the Doctor..." She noticed the look he gave her and worked to amend her statement. "After _you_ came through here, even as just an image, we wanted to monitor this location. In case it was a soft spot. Looks like we were right to base people here."

"And they have equipment there?" he asked. "Something that can help her?" It felt very important that they help her, though he couldn't say why. He felt so helpless here. No TARDIS, no equipment, no anything useful that could tell him what was happening.

Rose remembered the way the stranger had looked at him just before collapsing. She wasn't sure she liked that. "How do we know we can trust her?" Rose asked. "It's a secret base, after all..."

"We can trust her," the Doctor said.

Rose took that as confirmation that he knew her, but was choosing not to say. She decided not to have this discussion in front of Jackie. "Alright," she said. "If you say so. Let's go."

The Doctor picked the stranger up like she didn't weigh a thing. The three of them began their trek to the outpost.

...

Rose found her clearance badge in her pocket and held it up to the scanner. The doors opened with a loud metallic click.

"Miss Tyler," said a young gentleman. "And Mrs. Tyler. Welcome back."

"We need medical," Rose said.

 _Medical?_ the Doctor thought to himself. She sounded so formal, so military. It reminded him that a great deal of time had passed with her in this universe. Of course she'd change accordingly. Presumably she'd grown up a bit.

"Of course," the man said. "Right this way."

He led them along a nondescript corridor. "Can I ask the identities of your guests?" he asked. 

The woman in the Doctor's arms stirred long enough to mutter a statement: "That's classified, you son of a..."

"She's awake!" Jackie said.

But the red haired woman fell limp again. "Not anymore," the Doctor said. "And she may be classified, but I'm..." There came the name issue again. "John. John Smith."

"Alias for the Doctor, right?" the man asked. "It says so in our records..." He stopped. "Oh my god, you're not actually him, are you? Because that would seriously be so cool. But how would you have made it back across...?"

"We don't have time for this, Quest," Rose said.

"Yeah of course," Quest said. "So sorry. I get distracted..."

Quest led them into the infirmary. 

"Impressive hardware," The Doctor said. It was a genuine compliment. "Where can I put her?"

"Here," Quest said, indicating a cot. "What happened to her? I don't see obvious signs of head trauma..."

"That's what I'd like to find out," The Doctor said. "I can take it from here. No need to involve the rest of your team."

"Rest of my team?" Quest laughed. "Oh you're serious?" He glanced at Rose. "You didn't tell him...?"

"Quest is the team," Rose explained. "He's supposed to send an alert if there's activity. After the first year of monitoring, it just seemed like a waste of resources to keep a full team out here when they're needed elsewhere."

"Right," The Doctor said. "Well that makes things simpler, doesn't it?" He looked at the woman. He didn't like the look of her. So unnaturally pale, such deep shadows around the eyes, such shallow breathing..."Could I borrow your equipment? Do you have a med scanner?"

"Absolutely," Quest said. He handed The Doctor a small device, not unlike a Wii Remote. "The controls are fairly simple, you just..."

But the Doctor figured it out in seconds. He pushed up a sliding button to turn the device on, then held down a green button as he waved it over the woman. It sparked, emitting a slight electric shock before powering off. The Doctor dropped it by accident.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry," Quest said. "There must've been a malfunction with the hardware-"

"It's fine," The Doctor said patiently. "Do you have anything else?"

Quest handed him a small device that looked rather like an iPad. "That should do better for you," he said. "I was just doing calibrations on that one this morning. New software patch that I designed myself."

The Doctor powered it on and held it above the woman, expecting it to work rather like an x-ray. It instantly shorted out and powered down as well.

"What the hell?" Quest asked.

The Doctor was beginning to form a hypothesis. "Do you have a medscan helmet? Something to measure brainwaves?"

"Of course," Quest replied. He retrieved one from the other side of the room and handed it to The Doctor, who fixed it to the woman's head, accepting a little help from Quest to make sure it was on properly and calibrated.

"Alright," The Doctor said. "Fire it up."

It looked at first as if the device was working. The screen indicated that it was working to achieve a neural link.

But then it, too, shorted out and powered down.

"I don't understand," Quest said. "What's happening?"

"I think it's her," The Doctor said. "I wish I had my sonic! Then I could scan and see if she's emitting any sort of interference...Well, of course there's always the chance that she'd just short out my sonic too."

"What's going on here?" Quest asked. "Who is she?"

"No idea," The Doctor said. "She arrived shortly after we did. She just appeared out of thin air."

Quest's eyes widened with a curious fascination. "Really? Some sort of transmat? Or teleportation? You don't think she came from the other side, do you? No, that would be insane...You can't cross the Void without some sort of vessel..."

"And she wasn't in a ship," The Doctor said. "It was just her. She appeared, then passed out. I don't know who she is or why she's here or what happened to her, but we have to help her, don't we?"

"I'll see about getting her on some fluids," Quest said. "She could be dehydrated. Who knows what she's been through?"

"She sort of looks like a ghost, doesn't she?" Jackie asked.

"Yeah," Rose said. "Except we know by now that ghosts are never what they seem."

...

Quest got the woman hooked up to an IV while Jackie went to call Rose's father.

"Her pulse seems weak," Quest said. "If I wasn't so worried about shorting out my heart monitor, I'd offer that to you."

"Do it," The Doctor said. "I can repair it if the worst happens."

Quest nodded and went to retrieve a heart monitor. The Doctor just stared down at the woman, his face unreadable. Rose moved up next to him.

"So," she said. "You have any clue who she is?"

"Not a one," he admitted.

"Right," she said. "Because it's funny, she looked at you like she knew you."

The Doctor looked at Rose and she held his gaze. "What are you asking me?"

"I'm just saying it's alright," she said. "You can tell me. You've had a long life, you're bound to run into all sorts of people..."

"I really have no clue who she is, Rose," the Doctor said. "I'm as confused as you are. But you're right. She did look at me like she knows me. Which leaves us with possibilities."

"Such as?"

"I'm a time traveler," he said. "Or...I was. Maybe I will be again. Or maybe she is. At any rate, it's possible she's met me, but I haven't met her."

"That makes sense," Rose said. 

"You know what I never considered last time I was here?" he mused. "Where is this universe's Doctor? It's not a given that there should be one, of course-"

"There was no Rose here."

He nodded. "Exactly. But if there was one, it's possible she met him instead."

"The look in her eyes when she saw you," Rose said. "She was so suspicious and angry at first, but then she saw you. There was shock. Then confusion. Then frustration. Then weariness..."

"All with an undercurrent of hope beneath it."

She nodded. "All in the span of a few seconds. She was _relieved_ to see you. But also looked at you like you weren't possible. She almost looked at you like..."

"Like what?"

"Like you're someone she loved deeply, but lost."

"So what you're really asking me is if I had a relationship with her during the time we were apart."

She didn't try to deny it. "I don't know how long we were apart on your end. I'm not going to get upset with you for...I mean I know how it goes for you..."

"I really don't know who she is. I wouldn't keep a thing like that from you."

"Good," she said.

"I have a feeling that we can trust her," the Doctor said. "I can't explain it, but I felt it the moment I heard her voice. Didn't you feel it too?"

"No," Rose admitted. "I didn't feel anything."

"So just me then," he said. "Interesting."

"What's interesting to me is how she keeps shorting out all the scanners," Rose said.

"You're right," the Doctor said. "That _is_ interesting."

"Here's your heart monitor," Quest said.

"Brilliant," the Doctor said. "Let's just get her hooked up..."

The heart monitor shorted out too, but it took it a second longer than it took the other machines.

The Doctor peered at the dead screen. "What?"

"It has to be her," Quest said. "This confirms it-"

"No, no, did any of you see that?" he demanded.

"See what?" Rose asked.

"On the screen!" he jabbed at it with a finger. "Just before it went down! That doesn't make sense..."

"What doesn't make sense?" Rose asked.

The Doctor looked around. "A stethoscope! I need a stethoscope! It's low-tech, it can't short out!"

"Right," Quest said. He pulled one from a drawer and handed it to him. "What exactly are you looking for?"

"I'll tell you if I find it," the Doctor said. "And there's no way I will. It's impossible..." He put on the stethoscope and held it to her chest.

"Doctor?" Rose asked. "What is it?"

His own hearts were beating so loud that it was hard to trust what he was hearing. He motioned for Rose to come nearer and handed her the stethoscope. "Tell me what you hear."

She listened for a moment, then looked up at him. "Two hearts?"

He could hardly dare to breathe. "Two hearts."

"But that means..."

"We don't know that," the Doctor said. "There are other two-hearted species in the universe. Of course, they don't tend to pass as human on first glance..."

"She was acting confused," Rose said slowly. "Then she just keeled over. You don't think it could be Regeneration Sickness? Like it was with you the last time?"

"It's possible," he said. "We'll have to watch her to see if she breathes out any excess Artron Energy."

...

The Doctor had never liked waiting around, but something about this particular wait was agonizing. Rose knew what this could mean to him, so when he stopped pacing for a moment and sat down next to the door, she sat next to him and took his hand. He was surprised by the gesture at first, but then squeezed her hand.

"I know what you're thinking," Rose said.

"Do you?"

"New universe," she said. "Maybe here, the Time War never happened. Maybe here, your people lived. I felt the same way the first time, remember? I came looking for my dad."

"You've been here a couple of years," the Doctor said. "Did you ever see any indication that there were Timelords here?"

"Not in the present day," Rose admitted.

"Meaning what?"

"Meaning there are stories in the Torchwood records. They're mostly classified and I don't have that sort of clearance. But I always thought it might be an alternate Doctor. Maybe even an alternate me. Because what _wasn't_ classified sounded very close to the way we inspired the creation of Torchwood on our Earth. It's possible there are other Gallifreyans out there, but as far as I know, no contact was ever made."

Jackie came back in the room. "There's going to be a delay, no matter how you look at it," she said. "There's another swarm over the Channel."

"Swarm?" the Doctor asked.

Rose was almost amused. "Oh that's right, you don't know about those," she said. "Sort of alien insect swarm. No way to get rid of them. They block all traffic around for miles. The weather stations track the migration now, same as with hurricanes. So we have to wait for them to clear up."

"Anyway," Jackie said. "Your father said it will take a while to get clearance to come for us." She nodded at the woman. "Whoever she is, we can help her better when we're back in London."

"No," the woman said. Her voice was rough, like sandpaper. "You can't move me...I can't go..."

"She's awake," said Rose, getting to her feet. She and Jackie came to the bedside. The Doctor got up as well, but stayed back by the door. 

"It's alright, love," said Jackie. She leaned over Ginger and stroked her hair in a motherly way. "We'll get you taken care of, don't you worry."

"Don't touch me," the woman spat. "I need to get back...

"Back to where?" Rose asked. "Where did you come from?"

She still seemed disoriented, but now she was frantic as well. "Doctor..." she whispered. 

"They're bringing one with them," said Jackie. "Don't you worry..."

But Rose remembered what she and the Doctor had just discussed. "You don't think she means...?"

"Rose, there's no telling what she means."

The woman suddenly went still. "Rose?" She peered up at Rose, squinting without her glasses. "Not...Rose Tyler?"

This was truly unexpected. Rose and Jackie exchanged a glance.

"How do you know that name?" Rose asked.

"He told me," she said. "The Doctor..." She sat up sharply and looked around. Her eyes found the door.

"Oh my god," she whispered. "That's impossible."

...

Ginger couldn't see the shape of him, but could see the colors and vague outlines. It was him. She knew it. "Where the fuck are my glasses?" she asked.

"Here," Jackie said. 

Ginger shoved her glasses onto her face and looked at the Doctor. Nobody spoke for a moment.

"Somebody explain," Ginger said. "Right now. I'm like a thousand percent not in the mood for any games..." Whatever threat she'd been building to fell apart, when her migraine hit her again. She put her face in her hands and collapsed to the pillow.

"Are you ill?" the Doctor asked.

"Artron Deficiency," Ginger managed to choke out. "That's what you called it. Most of my migraines these days are stress activated, but I can tell by now when I've depleted my Artron Energy."

"That doesn't make any sense," he said softly.

"That's what you always say," she laughed sadly. She groaned. "There were probably magnets on that transmat! The last time I felt nearly this bad was when those wolf people had me in a magnetic tractor beam...or that one time the Weeping Angels fed off me-"

His brow furrowed. "Weeping Angels?"

"That was ages ago," she said dismissively. "This is worse. This is _so_ much worse. God this hurts and I feel like I can barely move...I'm so tired..."

"Should she get some rest?" Jackie asked quietly.

"I don't need rest," Ginger said. "I need Artron Energy, then I need to get back to my own time."

"Your own time?" the Doctor asked.

"Yeah," she said. "This can't be mine...It's all wrong..." She nodded at Rose. "She's still with you."

"What do you mean still?" Rose asked.

"So that means you haven't met me yet," Ginger asked. 

"I don't understand," the Doctor said. "Who are you?"

"Right," Ginger said. "Well, I normally don't give this information out to just anyone, but since it seems like I'm screwing with my own time stream here, I might as well." She propped herself up by an elbow and held out a hand. "Ginger Roswell. I'm your Wysaella."

Rose could tell that this strange word meant something to the Doctor.

He was stunned. Whatever he'd expected, it wasn't that. _Wysaella_ , he thought. _That's...Never mind what that means or the likelihood of that being real...That's a Gallifreyan word._

His original supposition about her planet of origin was beginning to look more and more probable.

He came forward and took her hand. This was a big moment. But, for all the hype, neither of them felt anything much from this brief handshake. She closed her eyes and sank back onto the pillow.

He noted that she seemed to be in a lot of pain. "How can I help you?"

"I need rift energy," she groaned. "Lots of it. I'd say I need to get to Wales, but I really don't think I should go anywhere."

The more she talked, the less she made sense. "Why not?"

"I'm sure I was brought here for a reason. I need to find out what that is, and kick someone's ass for it."

This still wasn't making sense, but he decided to go along with it. "You said something about Artron Energy?"

"Yeah," she said. "I'm running on empty right now."

He nodded. "I should have just enough residual from Regeneration. I can give it to you."

She frowned. "You don't have to do that-"

"I don't need it," he insisted. "It doesn't do me any good, and if I keep it, it'll just dissipate on its own anyway."

"I don't think that's how that works," she said doubtfully.

"Just trust me, will you?"

She looked at him. "Always," she said. 

"I'll give you all I have," he said. "I hope that's enough."

Rose watched as he put his hands on either side of Ginger's face. The Doctor leaned in close and pressed their foreheads together. Their eyes closed.

A little color returned to Ginger's cheeks before he let go of her. She peered at him with a puzzled expression.

"What?" he asked.

"There's something...I know you're younger but...There's something...Where are we? Where did I come through?"

"You're in Norway," Rose said. "Dårlig Ulv-Stranden."

"Bad Wolf Bay," Ginger whispered as the pieces fell into place. "No. That's impossible..."

"You keep saying that," the Doctor said. "What's impossible?"

"He told me about Bad Wolf Bay," she explained. "But this wasn't a place you two went, it was...If I'm here and you're both really here, which I know that you are...I'm in a parallel universe." She laughed with disbelief. "That is so _cool_...Oh but that's not good, is it? That's really really not good." She focused again on the Doctor. "You're the Metacrisis Doctor, aren't you? The one who's part Donna?"

"Part human," he protested. "Part Donna sounds so..."

"I _knew_ there was something off about you!" she said. "I _knew_ it!"

"Off?" Rose asked. "How d'ya mean off?"

"Not like _off_ off," Ginger said. "He's still him, but I thought...I mean I _felt_ it was you, but then I felt that you were younger...I just didn't realize. How is this all making perfect sense and no sense whatsoever? My life is so fuckin' weird."

The Doctor noticed the way her eyes kept darting to the wall. "Why do you keep looking at the clock? Do you have somewhere to be?"

Ginger tore her eyes away from the analog clock. "Sorry," she said. "Just...your clock's eight seconds slow."

He squinted at her. "What do you mean it's eight seconds slow? You just woke up, how could you know that just from looking?"

"I don't _know_ , man!" she said. "I can hear the ticking echoing in my head, but it feels off. It doesn't match. It's bothering me."

"You're impossible."

The corners of her mouth twitched. "Don't sound so impressed." She got to her feet.

"You probably shouldn't try to move," said Jackie.

"I've got to get back to my universe," she said firmly. "Nobody's gonna get in my way. I'm fine now. Honestly. Mr. Metacrisis over there gave me just enough Artron Energy to move. If I can just get back to my universe, I'll refuel when I get there."

"Your universe?" said Quest as he reentered the room. "Wait, so let me get this straight...You're from a parallel universe?"

Ginger stared at him. "Who's this fuckin' guy?"

"Quest," said the technician. "Pleased to meet you. Sorry if I sound a little excited, but did you just say you came here from a parallel universe without a transport vehicle?"

"That's right," she said.

"We didn't find any vortex manipulators on her either," the Doctor said.

"So you came over on your own?" Quest asked. "Are you somehow bioengineered to survive interdimensional travel without protection?"

She wasn't sure what he was asking her. "I...I don't... _Look,_ I don't have time for this. There must've been some sort of transmat. One minute I was there, the next minute I'm here. Now we can stand here all day, or we can get to work finding out what the hell's going on."

"We tried to do medscans on you when you arrived," Quest said. "You shorted them all out. Could be your internal circuitry-"

" _Circuitry?"_ she mocked. "I'm not a machine. I just tend to short out scanners, okay? The only person who was ever able to take readings of me was..."

She caught the Doctor's eye, then quickly looked away.

"Listen," the Doctor said gently. "I know you're in a hurry. But I'd like to make sure you're up to it first." She seemed to trust him, and if it was true that his doppelganger was able to get readings off her then maybe the reason why he hadn't been successful so far was because she had up a defense mechanism. "Would you consent to me running some basic diagnostics? Just to be safe?"

She recognized that same old concern and it made her feel weirdly safe. She sighed. "Fine. Get it over with. Quickly."

"I fixed the hand-held," Quest said. "It should work now." He handed the Doctor the iPad-looking scanner.

"We'll see," he said. He looked at Ginger. "Could you have a seat?"

She clearly didn't want to, but she begrudgingly sat back down on the cot. "If I'm good, do I get a lollipop?" she muttered dryly.

"Oh so you're funny," he said. "I like funny."

"I know," she said softly. 

He looked at her. "You sounded a bit sad when you said that."

She took a moment to decide how much to say. "It's just that you didn't respond the way I expected you to. I know exactly the way he would've...I dunno, maybe it's an inside joke."

He powered up the hand-held scanner. "You sure you're alright with this?"

She shrugged.

"Is there anything you want to tell me before I begin? Just so I'm not surprised?"

She shook her head and avoided his gaze.

"Alright," he said. He held the scanner over her head. The screen read glitched for a second, but then settled. He blinked. "Your brain..."

She couldn't help but smile. "Yeah."

"It's..."

"He can't figure out what to make of it either," she said. "So don't feel bad about it." 

"Structurally Gallifreyan," he said. "But some of these structures..."

"Yeah I know. You don't recognize them."

"Fascinating," he said.

He slowly lowered the scanner until it was hovering about her chest.

"My eyes are up here," she joked.

She immediately regretted the joke when he looked up at her. She knew that look in his eyes. That impossible hope. It hurt a lot to see him like this after all she'd been through with her own Doctor.

"You," he said.

"I know," she said.

"How?"

"It's a long story."

He could see in her eyes that it was a sad one, so he dropped it for now.

"You're a miracle," he said.

"I wouldn't exactly say that," she said self-consciously.

"What is it?" Jackie asked. "What's happening?"

Rose couldn't tear her eyes away from the screen. "Two hearts," Rose whispered. "He was right."

"You're Gallifreyan," the Doctor said.

She winced. "I prefer ethnically Gallifreyan, culturally Earthling."

This was all so much to have happen in a day. He wasn't quite sure what to make of this.

"I need to get home," she reminded him. "We need to go back to that beach, try to find the rupture that brought me through."

"Oooh now there's a challenge!" said Quest. "Let me just grab-"

"Not you," Ginger said. She looked at the Doctor. "Just him. Not offense, but I don't know any of you."

Rose wasn't thrilled at the idea of leaving the Doctor alone with this woman. "It's fine," Rose said. "We'll just wait here until you get back."

If Ginger understood the tiny note of bitter sarcasm in her voice, she didn't show it. "Great. It's settled. I figure with the sonic, we should have this sorted in no time..." She saw the Doctor's face. "What?"

"I don't exactly have a sonic," he admitted.

"What?" she asked. "He stranded you here with no ship and no sonic? Sometimes my Doctor can be a bit of a jerk."

"He tries," the Doctor said. "But you're not wrong."

...

The Doctor and Ginger walked silently along the beach, waving scanners in front of them as they attempted to locate the breach.

"What did you say the breach would look like again?" Ginger asked.

"Like a sort of tear," the Doctor said.

"Right," she said. "So I still haven't found anything. I feel like those guys from Spaceballs who were ordered to comb the desert."

The Doctor smiled. "What year did you say you were from again?"

She laughed. "Don't worry, I confused him too the first time we met. With my clothes and my tech...he thought he'd landed 20 years too early."

"It looks like you managed to slip in just before the universe sealed itself off for good," the Doctor said. "I'm sorry. I don't know of any way to get back without breaking the universe."

"There has to be something," she said. "If there wasn't, there wouldn't be all these doppelgangers flying around all the time."

"Doppelgangers?" he repeated. "Your time sounds fun."

"It was sometimes," she admitted. She kicked at the sand in frustration. "There _has_ to be a way to get back! I can't just be stuck here!" She sank to the ground and stared into the ocean. "I was in the middle of a very important conversation..."

He could see that she was upset. "You've got someone back home who's important to you."

She looked up at him momentarily before blinking back tears and staring off into the horizon again. "Yeah. Feels strange to admit, but yeah. And I'll never forgive myself if..."

"Are you in some sort of trouble?" he asked.

"Probably," she said. "But I don't know what sort yet. I don't know who would go to all this trouble. God, I'm just so sick of this. After the day I've had already..."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

She shook her head. "No. It won't do any good."

He heard a strange noise. "Did your stomach just growl?" he asked.

She appeared strangely mortified by her body's betrayal. "Yeah. I guess it did."

"So you _do_ eat? It's not just this strange Artron Energy thing?"

"Yeah, I eat," she said wearily.

"You should've _said_ so-"

"We don't have time-"

"Oh we don't have time, is it? Yes, you look so busy sitting there doing absolutely nothing. Come on, you can't think if you're hungry, and I'm not gonna have you keel over on me. No we're going to get a hot meal in you, and I won't hear another word about it."

She squinted at him. "Metacrisis you sure does talk funny," she remarked.

"I know," he said. Now it was his turn to feel a little embarrassed.

"And I'm going to pretend you didn't just take that tone with me," she said. "All sort of weirdly motherly and overbearing. Not even Sarah Jane's allowed to talk to me like that-"

"You know Sarah Jane?"

She stood up. "And that'll be the last time you interrupt me, you got that? Only time I let people interrupt me is if they're being useful or funny, and right now you're being neither."

"Oi!" he protested.

"Oi!" she shot back.

"My god, it's like talking to Donna," he said under his breath.

She could see that flicker of sadness in his eyes again. She knew it well. 

She crossed her arms. "Lemme ask you something. Did you and my Doctor talk about any of this before you did it?"

He was perplexed. "Any of...?"

She gestured around. "This. Sticking you here with blondie. Did you talk about it?"

"There wasn't time," he said.

"And you didn't talk about the implications of the Metacrisis either?"

"Did he tell you about that?"

She nodded. "So you didn't talk about it. But since you're him, I figure you've gotta know what he had to do."

"He took her memories," the Doctor said. "Didn't he? There was no other way."

"He told me her brain would've burned," she said. "You know I met her, just recently."

"How was she?"

"She didn't remember any of it, not that I asked. I didn't have to. Wilfred's a nice man, we had a bit more luck chatting with him. But Donna...She's happy. Has a husband. Kids."

He smiled. "So she did finally get what she wanted."

"I wonder if she did. Not that she doesn't love her family and not that she doesn't want that kind of life, but I just feel like...I dunno, once you have this kind of life, it's hard to convince yourself to go have a normal life. So I guess that makes me wonder...You've lived that life longer than any of us, but now you're stranded with no ship. So where does that leave you? Does the Doctor give it all up for a John Smith sort of life?"

He didn't answer for a moment. "I haven't quite figured that out myself," he admitted. He jabbed a finger at her. "But don't change the subject! We need to get some food in you! You're like a skinny little orphan girl and no wonder! You keep refusing to eat anything!"

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, but don't pretend you're not the same way. You and me, the king and queen of hyperfocus."

The comment made him pause. "Hyperfocus?"

She sighed. "Yeah, yeah, that's a conversation for later. You said there's food?"

...

The Doctor wasn't having much luck in the outpost kitchen finding something she'd eat. "What about granola bars?"

"What's in em?" she asked.

He read the label. "Cranberries, nuts..."

"Rubbish, you mean," she said. "How is there nothing bloody edible in this whole place?"

Rose watched from the doorway. "Does Quest have any NutriCrave bars?"

"What's that?" the Doctor asked.

"Just trust me," she said.

He looked through the assorted foods. "Yep, right here."

"What's in em?" Ginger asked suspiciously.

"Do you have any allergies?" Rose asked.

"No."

"So do you want to try something or not? I promise you'll like it."

Ginger stared her down suspiciously then nodded. The Doctor brought her the small bar which she unwrapped while not taking her eyes off Rose. She took a bite. Her eyes widened.

"Oh my god," she said. "This is like...the best maple pancakes I've ever tastes. What kinda Wonka magic is this?"

Rose smiled. "NutriCrave is made with this sort of chemical that binds to your taste buds and tricks them into tasting whatever we're craving." 

"That's incredible," Ginger said. She unwrapped another one. "I know how disappointing this must be for you."

"For me?" Rose asked.

"Not you. Him."

"What would I have to be disappointed about?" the Doctor asked.

"I know what must've gone through your head when you found out I'm Gallifreyan," she said. "I know you better than anyone, and I know you had that moment of hope before it all came crashing down. You had a million questions. Are there Timelords in this universe? Where are they? Was there a Time War? And that's just scratching the surface. But then you realized I'm from your original universe, and all those questions just became one. I'm grateful that you're not asking it. I know how hard it is for you to hold back."

"So you know what my question is."

"I do. And I know the follow up that would come if I answered in the way you're hoping. So go on. Get it out of your system so I can let you down again. I'm good at that."

"How did you escape the Time War?" he asked.

She looked at him sadly. "Who says I did?"

Rose could see that last bit of hope fade from his eyes, and decided this had to be a conversation for another time. He'd gone through too much. "So are we any closer to finding her a way home?"

"Not yet," he said. He glanced at Ginger. "What? Not gonna say something about how your Doctor would've hacked it by now if he were here?"

"You are the Doctor," she said. "If you haven't figured it out, it just means there's something we're missing."

"Maybe you should go look for that then," Rose said. "Quest is working on the problem too and we've contacted the Hub. Help will be here soon."

"Sounds good," Ginger said. "Let's go-"

"Not you," Rose said. "You're with me."

She looked at Rose for a long moment before crossing her arms. "And why's that?"

"You need better clothes," she said. "This pajama look isn't gonna cut it when the team gets here."

"I see your point," she said. "So what? Makeover time?"

"God no," she laughed. "How much time do you think we have? Come on, we had a few female scientists working here before we pulled them back to London, I know they left some stuff behind. Let's find you something to wear."

...

Rose waited patiently as Ginger looked for something to wear. She turned out to be as picky with clothes as she was with food.

"Most of this is hideous," she said.

"Yeah, well, beggars can't be choosers."

"I'm not a beggar. I'm quite fine to stay in what I've got on. Aha!" She located a black shirt and some jeans. "This should do nicely. Ohhhh..." She cracked a grin. "Now this is _beautiful,_ have a look at this!" She held up a green leather trench coat. "Now who would leave something like this behind?"

It struck Rose that something about Ginger's inflection was achingly familiar. "It is pretty, yeah." Ginger began changing, so Rose averted her eyes. "Just gonna do that in front of me?"

"What?" Ginger asked. "It's just us girls."

"I guess," Rose said. "Can I ask you something?"

"Go ahead," she said. "Got nothing to hide from a Rose Tyler. Well, almost nothing to hide. Nothing _relevant_ to hide-"

"You're...Ginger."

"I am," she said. "Well, not really. It's just a name."

"You appear here out of nowhere," Rose said. "You just sort of pass out..."

"Is there a question here somewhere?"

"You know the Doctor better than anyone. That's what you said. You're the only Gallifreyan who made it out of the Time War besides him."

Ginger finished getting dressed. "Now I never said-"

Rose finally looked directly at Ginger. "And all I'm thinking now is, did you think I wouldn't recognize you?"

Ginger tilted her head quizzically. "Do you know me?"

"Of course I know you," she said, taking a step forward. "And that's why I got rid of him. You came back for me, so now we can go-"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"It'll be you and me again, just like it's always been. Like I could ever settle for anything less, Doctor."

She leaned in close and Ginger only had a second to react. Ginger's eyes widened in shock as she ducked under Rose's arm and put her hands out in front of you. "What the hell?"

"It's alright," Rose said. "I don't care that you've regenerated into a woman. I still love you, no matter what body you're in-"

"It's really great that you're so tolerant, lady, but I'm not him," Ginger insisted. "I'm not, I'm sorry."

"But I don't understand," Rose said. "You talk like him, you dress very strangely-"

"Thanks."

"You're Gallifreyan. You even call yourself Ginger - you _know_ he's always wanted to be Ginger."

"That's circumstantial at best."

"You're so much like him! If you're not him, then why-"

"Because I love him too," Ginger said. "I love him too and...That's why I have to get back. I know you can understand that."

Rose looked into her eyes and remembered the way she'd looked at him. "You and him...You're...?"

"Yeah," she said. "No. I don't know. Maybe. We're complicated."

"You said we're from the past," Rose said.

"It's not like he just moved on from you," she said. "He never really did. And yeah I'm more than a rebound to him, but...I'm not your replacement. And it took us a long time to get past our issues. Well, as much as we were able to get past them. I love him and I'm trying to get home, even if it means we still can't be together. Which means that I'm not gonna stand here and let you take out your issues through me." Rose looked at her defiantly. "Listen, lady, it might not be splitting, but you're acting out. You're confused and mixed up and looking for excuses. You have every reason to be. This will be an adjustment. Boring normal life with a Metacrisis Doctor?"

"What if we can't get along the way we did?" Rose asked. "He changed, but I've changed too. What if it just can't work?"

"That's ridiculous," Ginger said. "You're perfect, wonderful Rose Tyler. The Doctor would do anything for you. He loves you. You need to trust that. You've got nothing to worry about."

"I'm so embarrassed," Rose said.

"Don't be," Ginger said. "But you're so willing to give him up? After everything? Is he really so horrible?"

"No!" she said hurriedly. "It's not that at all. I don't know...I just feel bad that he's still out there alone. I don't want him to be. I feel guilty, you know. Accepting the chance to be happy when he doesn't get one. It wasn't even that I was completely convinced you were him, you know. I'm just all over the place. Sometimes you do or say something exactly the way he used to, but sometimes you're a completely different person. I thought I could maybe rationalize that all away by thinking it was a regeneration instead of admitting to myself that maybe there's something else going on. I guess I was right about that though. Because I saw the way you looked at him..."

"Yeah," Ginger said softly. "But let's not think of that now. The important thing is that you didn't do anything here that you'll regret. And I'm not saying I'd totally reject you in another time when things are more stable. I mean you're not exactly bad looking. But you're his. Same as me. I wouldn't just let you do something you'd regret. And anyway, I'm not gonna tell anyone. Nobody ever has to know about this."

"Thank you," she said.

"Don't mention it." She grinned. "God, you know, I always thought you must be some perfect flawless intimidating goddess. Mythical Rose Tyler. But you're just as screwed up as the rest of us." Ginger walked around Rose toward the door. "I like you so much better now."

Ginger opened the door and her smile faded as she was immediately confronted with a room full of soldiers with particle guns aimed right at her. She held out a hand to motion for Rose to stay behind her.

"Hey fellas," Ginger said, trying to sound brave and flippant instead of deeply confused. "What did I do this time?"


	23. Don't Mess with Me

Back in the primary universe, the Doctor and Jack met up with the others in Sarah Jane's attic.

"Alright, so what do we know?" Jack asked.

"Basically they say we kidnapped their princess," Nova said. "Which I don't get, honestly. You want your princess back so badly you're willing to kill her in the crossfire?"

"She wouldn't be killed," the Doctor said. "Her species can withstand heat up to four times the intensity of your sun."

"So do we have any leads?" Jack asked. "Any clues as to who could've taken this princess?"

"A few," Alex said. "But we're going to need everyone to help investigate it. One's at an abandoned warehouse-"

"Always one of those," Jack said.

"We've been keeping an eye on what we think is an international smuggler's ring based out of there," Sarah Jane explained. "They've been harmless so far, so we've let it slide. But we have reason to suspect they may have upped their game to break into bigger markets."

"I'll take that one," said Jack. "If there's trouble, I'm your man."

"The next possibility is the Galactic Solutions Foundation," Alex continued.

"The what?" the Doctor asked.

Thea was programmed to see the phrase 'the what' as an activation to treat the previous statement as a searchable question.

"Galactic Solutions Foundation," she said in an even tone. "According to their website, they boast creative solutions to Earth's biggest problems by mining inspiration from space."

"I don't like the sound of that," the Doctor said.

"You shouldn't," said Alex. "We've got reason to believe that they've actually been shooting down alien spacecrafts and salvaging them for research. Nobody's ever proven anything, which is why I'd like to go in. And I'd like to request Thea come with me."

"Alright," the Doctor said. "And what's the third option?"

"The third option is you and me trying to negotiate on behalf of the human race," said Sarah Jane.

"Just like old times," he smiled. "I like those odds."

...

Nova hurried to catch up with Alex.

"Hey," she said. "You didn't give me anything to do."

"Oh," she said awkwardly. "Yeah. Sorry. I just...I mean maybe you should wait here until we get back. It's just we're sort of used to this kinda thing-"

"Nope," Nova said. "Nuh-uh. No way are you pulling that with me."

"What do you mean?"

"You're not benching me," she said. "I'm not gonna just sit here and be your tea girl or your secretary. I want to help. You need all the help you can get. I know you've got the super-genius android to help you with this one, but I can help too. I might not have any of your skills, but I've got practical mechanical and plumbing skills. You never know when it might come in handy. So I want to help." Alex didn't immediately answer. "You said I could. Why drag me all the way here if you're not going to let me help?"

She couldn't immediately think of an answer, at least not one that made sense. "Okay. You're right. I'm sorry. Come on. And start thinking of an alias on the way."

...

The Red Herring was pushed roughly into a wall as she and the Corsair were fitted with magnetic handcuffs.

"Oi!" the Corsair protested. "These cuffs are classified as cruel and unusual punishment by the Shadow Proclamation!"

"You think they care about the bloody Shadow Proclamation?" R.H. asked as their captors began roughly dragging them from the room. "They're Restavian smugglers, Corsair. They have no scruples."

"Hey, watch it!" said one of them.

"Yeah watch it," the Corsair said. "They could have scruples! If they knew what scruples were!" One of them smacked her roughly on the top her of her head. "Hey! I was being generous! I know how you lot are with multi-syllable words!"

"You're just lucky the two of you are so valuable," the smuggler said.

"Valuable for what we are or who we are?" the Red Herring asked.

"That depends on the buyer," the smuggler replied.

"Great," the Red Herring muttered under her breath. "We should check out the Restavians, she said. They might have a lead, she said. There's no way they'll recognize us under a shimmer, she said."

"I get it, I get it, I made a mistake," the Corsair snapped.

"Oh you made a mistake?" the Red Herring said. "Because that's _almost_ an apology."

"What would a Ginger know about apologies?" she snapped. "You lot just keep going and going, never looking back..."

"Don't lump me in with them," she said in a dangerous tone. "All I do is look back. I repent every day. But I don't see why I have to keep performing an apology for you every second of every day when I don't think you've even once apologized to me."

"For what? What apology would I owe a Ginger?"

"Well for starters, you could apologize for getting us captured."

"You knew it was a risk too!"

"And you could apologize for always calling me 'a Ginger' like that's an immutable, inescapable curse that you've been burdened with. I'm soooo unchangeable and beyond saving because I'm a Ginger."

"You believe that too!"

"I do! But it's different when I say it!"

"How?"

"Because when you do it, it's Gingerist."

" _Gingerist_ -"

"Will you two shut up?" the smuggler said. He opened a room to a cell and he and his friend threw the two of them in. "God, we'd better get a bloody buyer soon, because I don't want to have to listen to these two yap for any longer than I have to."

The door was slammed and locked from the outside.

"Yeah you'd better run!" R.H. shouted. "Bloody cowards!"

She sat down heavily.

"Will you stop pacing?" she asked after a moment. "You look ridiculous, pacing with your hands tied behind your back. Your balance is all off."

"That's mostly the magnets," she said. "They've got me all dizzy."

"All the more reason to sit down. They really should've chained us up. Here. Sit down with your back to me."

"I'm not giving you another opportunity to stab me in the back."

The Red Herring was really pissed off now. "Okay, so even when you're _not_ actually calling me 'a Ginger' you're _still_ blaming me for their actions! I wasn't the one who stabbed you! I wasn't the one who tortured you!"

"Yeah well you still have that face," she said. "How would you feel if you were stuck looking at someone all day who had the exact face of the person who broke you?"

The Red Herring felt a pang of sympathy for her at the sound of those words. "I'm sorry you feel that way. But there's nothing I can do about that. I'm not going to apologize for things I didn't do. I think you forget that I got fucked over just as much as you did."

"At least you didn't lose your life."

"Debatable." 

There was a short silence before the Red Herring spoke again.

"I was gonna try to get your cuffs off if you promised to get mine off," she said.

"You think they didn't think of that?" the Corsair asked. "They're monitoring us. You know the drill."

"Well fine," the Red Herring said. "I just won't offer to help anymore."

"Might be best for everyone," she said under her breath. "I know what help looks like to-"

"If you say ' _a Ginger'_ one more time..."

...

Jack Harkness found himself staring down the barrels of several guns.

"Alright, just calm down," he said charmingly. "I'm sure we can talk this out."

The smugglers were a species of blue humanoids with small bumpy horn-like protrusions on their skulls.

"He's after the cargo," said one. "Kill him."

The way the men responded told him that the one speaking was the ringleader.

"Woah woah woah," he said. "Nobody said anything about cargo. Sorry, I'm being rude. I don't think I caught your name...?"

But the big fella wasn't biting. "That's because I'm not foolish enough to give out my name to strangers."

"That's a good idea," he said. "Look, nobody has to get hurt. I just want to check to make sure that you haven't hurt the girl-"

"The girl?" the alien repeated. "What girl?"

Jack blinked. "The...one you kidnapped?"

"We didn't kidnap anyone. What kind of operation do you think this is?"

"The one where you...smuggle things? I mean what are you trying so hard to defend-" The guns were suddenly aimed back at him. "Alright. I got the hint. I'll just be going then."

He was suddenly completely sure that these numbskulls hadn't kidnapped the princess. But he resolved to keep tabs on these guys anyway.

...

"You sure you don't mind being undercover as maintenance," Alex asked.

"It's fine," Nova said. "It's better than you doing it. Do you even know how to repair and replace a faulty electrical switch?"

"Carefully?" she offered.

"My point exactly. If something needs doing for my cover, I know this world far better than you. I can blend in. What's your cover again?"

"Mine's far more degrading," she said. "I'm the new intern."

...

"Why aren't we getting through?" Sarah Jane asked. "It's like the call keeps being dropped."

"It's not being dropped," the Doctor said. "They're rejecting it. They're not interested in a negotiation. I'm sure we're not the only ones trying."

"Well how can they expect to find the princess if no one can contact them to hand her over?"

"That's it!" the Doctor said. "Mr. Smith, could you add on a message to our transmission request?"

"Certainly," Mr. Smith said. "What should it say?"

"Tell them we've got the princess and we're ready to talk."

"Are you sure that's wise?" Sarah Jane asked. "A bluff with twenty-four hours to go?"

"It's all we've got," he said. "Because they're not going to listen to any reasonable person offering to help them find the princess or even someone insisting they don't have her. They're expecting a ransom request. And we're going to let them think we have one."

...

The director of the Galactic Solutions Foundation was a blonde woman in her 40s by the name of Mrs. Culver. She was what Ginger would've called a 'pencil skirt'. Uptight, demanding career woman who thinks everyone below her is worthless.

Well this pencil skirt had a gun pulled on Alex.

"Who are you?" Mrs. Culver asked. "And I mean really. Because you're not the new intern."

"I can explain," Alex said. 

"You'd better," she said. "Because you're about to be in a lot of trouble. Sniffing around our R&D labs...Tampering with the alien technology..."

"Some of that isn't technology," she said. "I take it those cadavers weren't donated to science willingly?"

"Smart girl," she said. "But we're developing new medicines from the biodata we've gathered. So much good is being done."

"From so much evil, you mean. They're _people_ -"

"Aliens aren't people. And they don't see us as anything more than something to be conquered or experimented on, so why shouldn't we treat them the same?"

"None of that is true," Alex said. "You can't judge all aliens off of just one-"

"It's not just one. How many times has Earth been invaded now? This is all just preventative."

Alex spotted Nova in the doorway. She was miming something. She was pulling something.

_The fan._

After they'd started suspecting Mrs. Culver, Nova had found out that the rotating ceiling fan in Culver's office was broken. When you pulled the string, it wouldn't start. Now the simple solution was just to upgrade this one. Every room in the building was air conditioned. But she thought this fan was charming. She had this idea that it made the place homey and gave her an air of warmth. She was wrong.

"Hey," Alex said. "Do I get, like, a last request? Before you shoot me?"

"Depends what it is," said Mrs. Culver.

"I heard they were fixing your fan," Alex said. "I was hoping to see it work just once...Because it's really a...beautiful...piece of...craftsmanship?"

Mrs. Culver didn't respond for a moment. "You know, it really is, isn't it? I'd never deny a fellow fan...Get it?"

Alex faked a laugh. "Yeah, totally completely funny," she lied.

Mrs. Culver reached up to pull the silver chain that was dangling from the ceiling. "Prepare to be blown away..."

Mrs. Culver pulled on the chain and an electric shock ran through her. She collapsed to the floor.

"Oh my god," Alex said. "Is she dead?"

"No," Nova said. "I just rigged it with enough to knock her out after I started to see proof of what she was doing."

"Did you find the princess?"

"No," Nova said. "Thea says she's not here. So we have to leave now."

"We'll call in reinforcements from the street," she agreed. "Where is Thea anyway?"

"I told her to use her teleportation to rescue the trapped aliens. The ones that are alive anyway."

Alex grinned. "Good thinking."

...

"So I don't get it," Alex said after they all met back at Sarah Jane's. "None of our leads panned out?"

"We're trying to send a signal," the Doctor said. "They haven't picked up yet."

"You guys do realize that this princess could be literally anywhere," Nova said. "This is a big planet."

"She's right," the Doctor said. "I hate to admit it, but she's right." 

It was at that moment that the transmission was accepted. The footage wasn't well-lit, so they couldn't exactly make out the shape of the alien.

"Yes hello," the Doctor said. "We've got your princess. We'd like to meet to make the exchange."

"Which one of you speaks for the human race?" the alien asked.

"I do," said Jack, Sarah Jane, and Alex in unison.

"But for now, you'll negotiate with me," said the Doctor.

"We will not negotiate," the alien said. "You will return her or die. Prepare for transmat."

"Now hold on," Alex said. "We didn't agree to any transmat-"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I've got to the point where I'm stretching myself a little thin between work and writing, so I'm going to be on hiatus for a little over two weeks. Hopefully by then I'll have my brain working again lmao. See you then!


	24. No Horses

**Pete's World**

"Stop!" The Doctor shouted as he pushed through the line of soldiers. "What are you doing? Stop!"

"Stay back, sir," one of the soldiers shouted without taking his eyes off Ginger. "This is official government business."

"What sort of government points guns at two defenseless women?" the Doctor asked.

"She's hardly defenseless," said a voice that was familiar only to Ginger.

The soldiers parted to let a woman through, but they closed ranks behind her and kept their guns trained on Ginger. The woman was mid-twenties with chin-length brown hair and green eyes. Her black jacket was covered in patches and her black trousers were tucked into combat boots. 

"Alex?" Ginger asked.

Evidently this was the wrong this to say. The alternate version of Alex stood up straighter and fixed her with a steely gaze. "You are under arrest," she said. 

"By whose order?" the Doctor demanded. 

"Mine," she said.

"You?" the Doctor asked. "Who are you?"

"Sorry, Madam Director," Rose said. "I didn't realize it was you."

Ginger raised her eyebrows. "Madam Director?" she repeated. "No kidding? Alex Mitchell is director of the Torchwood Institute?"

This Alex didn't seem to like it when Ginger used her name. "By decree of the Torchwood Institute, I place you under arrest. This woman is an enemy of this universe, so if she doesn't come willingly, which I hope she doesn't, we will just have to kill her."

"Kill her?" Rose asked. 

"No one's dying today," the Doctor said.

"Of course you'd say that," the other Alex said. "How young are you here anyway? Trust me, future you will thank me for changing this timeline."

"Young?" he repeated.

"This is him," Rose said. "My Doctor."

The Doctor felt a rush of warmth at these words.

"So you found him," Alex said evenly. "Good for you."

"What's she done anyway?" Rose added. "What are the charges?"

"Yeah," Ginger said. "I haven't done anything wrong!" But the look in this Alex's eyes made her question that. "...Lately."

"Treason," Alex said. "Terrorism. Murder."

"That can't be true," the Doctor said. 

"It isn't," Ginger said. "Mostly."

"Good thing we caught you before you could flee this dimension," Alex said. "Unfortunately Torchwood on this side has no jurisdiction in alternate timelines, so it would be nearly impossible to extradite you without a bounty hunter. Which you well know."

"I don't," Ginger said. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Flee this dimension," the Doctor repeated in a low voice.

She frowned and looked at him. "Don't look at me like that," she said.

"Like what?" he repeated, without a trace of mirth in his voice.

"Like I've betrayed you," she said. "You look like a wounded animal and I can't stand it. I can see the wheels in your head turning - not that they ever stop. Whatever pieces you think you're putting together, it's not like that."

"You were having us find you a way out of this dimension," he said. 

"I was," she said.

"I trusted you," he said. "Immediately. Without reason. Tell me I'm wrong and you weren't using me."

"I'm not using you," she said. "I'd never do that to you. I don't know what she's talking about. Everything I told you is true. I don't know how I got here. I do have someone important to get back to-"

"You said I'm your Wysaella," he interrupted. "Is that a lie?"

The two of them looked at each other for a moment.

"There's that word again," Rose said softly. "What does that mean?"

"I'm not lying to you," Ginger insisted. "You feel it. I know you do. Please. _Veleveh. Naerishim."_

It had been so long since he'd heard Gallifreyan that it almost felt like a physical shock to his system. He looked into her imploring eyes and wished for a logical way to understand.

"This has gone on long enough," the other Alex said. "We shouldn't've let her talk this much. We know how easy it is for her to manipulate your kind." She motioned to the soldiers. "Place her under arrest. Magnetic cuffs please."

Ginger went white as a sheet. "No, please. Not magnetic cuffs."

"They're the only way we can make sure you won't escape," the other Alex said.

"No please," she said. "Don't do this." She remembered something the Corsair had said. "Use of magnetic cuffs is outlawed under the Shadow Proclamation-"

The other Alex slapped her in the face. "Don't talk about the Shadow Proclamation after _you_ were the one who destroyed them."

"What?" Ginger said. "I didn't. I swear, I've never even met the Shadow Proclamation..." A soldier came forward with magnetic cuffs. "I swear to god if you touch me-"

"You'll what?" the other Alex asked. "Kill us all?" She turned to the soldier. "Hurry before she gets away."

The Doctor didn't understand why the magnetic cuffs scared Ginger, but he could tell they did. Something about this wasn't sitting with him right. "Will they hurt her?" the Doctor asked.

"Never you mind," the other Alex said.

Ginger was grabbed roughly and the magnetic cuffs were put in place. "No please," she said. She locked eyes with the Doctor. "You can't let them do this, please! _Naerishim. Timor Savasha."_

"I'm sorry," he said.

"No," Ginger said as she was dragged away. "Please, you can't do this. Please! Doctor!"

"Keep her in the holding cell as we prepare the transport," the other Alex said.

"Where are you taking her?" the Doctor asked.

"Back to London," she said. "What did she say to you?"

"What?"

"You two are the only people in this universe who speak Gallifreyan. I need to know what she said to you."

He knew this could be important. If this woman was as dangerous as they were saying, it would probably be wise to tell the truth. But it also occurred to him that these words could have no possible relevance to their investigation. It wasn't a confession or a state secret. It felt very private.

"Nothing," he lied. "She was just begging me to let her go. That's all."

...

"What's going on?" Jackie asked when they got back to the lab.

"I don't know," the Doctor said.

"Who are all these soldiers?"

"I don't know," he repeated. 

"They're Torchwood, mum," Rose said. "They're here to arrest Ginger."

"What, really?" Jackie asked. "What's she done?"

"They said she's hurt people. She's a fugitive." She saw the look on the Doctor's face. "Doctor? What is it?"

"I don't know," he repeated. "Something about this isn't adding up, it doesn't make sense."

"What were those words she said to you?" Rose asked in a low voice. He looked at her so she pressed on. "I know you said she was just begging for her life, but I know you. Whatever she said meant more to you. You can tell me."

He glanced at the soldiers outside the door and stepped a little closer to her. "I'll tell you," he said. "But it won't sound like it means anything. She really _wasn't_ saying anything important. She said _veleveh,_ which means 'trust me'. But not like the casual 'trust me'. That's _emiri._ You use that sort of loosely, the way you would with a casual acquaintance when it wasn't really that important. _Veleveh_ is a much rarer word, one you only use when it's important between people who know each other deeply. Usually family."

"So what's the rest of it mean?" Rose pressed. "She said that one word twice, that whatsit...Neerasha...?"

" _Naerishim,"_ the Doctor said solemnly. " _Shim_ is the word for truth. Well, sort of. It's a variant of truth. _Shim_ doesn't imply a universal invariant or right or fixed concept. It implies a shared fact. Timelord society was forced long ago to accept that some things only remain truths within certain timelines, so we invented a word to mean truth that shares all tenses - past, present, and future - yet allows for variability. _Shim_ acknowledges that some things we experience together will not exist for those outside of our time stream. But usually the word doesn't mean all of that. It's more modern connotation was 'a truth shared between people'. Adding the prefix _ri_ to it would literally mean 'broken truth', which in context is a breach of trust. Humans would simplify that to be a lie. Then there's the additional prefix _nae_ which is essentially a negation. Really similar to putting 'non' or 'un' in front of a word. So put that all together...The word _naerishim_ is one sentence. 'I wouldn't lie to you.' But it's more than that, it's more personal than that. It's I _couldn't_ lie to you - past, present, and future. Because we've been through too much and we both know this truth. It's deeply personal and not spoken lightly. It's a contract. So when I didn't trust her after that, it's like breaking that promise...There's nothing like it in the English language. Or maybe there is. Closest I can think of is that it's like I disowned her."

Rose remembered the look in Ginger's eyes when she'd realized he still didn't trust her. "Or broke up with her," she said.

Something about that was weighing heavily on his heart. "Yeah."

"And that other thing?" Rose asked. "She said one more thing as they were dragging her off."

" _Timor savasha,"_ he said. "She said we're quantum entangled. Which..."

"What is it?" Rose asked.

He shook his head. "Nothing. I can't shake the feeling that we did something wrong. She could just be using us like they're saying, but..."

"What do you feel is right?" Rose asked. 

"I've been wrong before," he said. 

"I trust you," Rose said. "If you think there's something else going on, then I do too."

"Alright, so what do we do about it?" Jackie asked. "I reckon we only have minutes before they cart her off back to London."

"She asked us not to move her," the Doctor said. "So maybe the first step isn't trying to get in to see her, maybe it's stopping them from taking her in the first place."

"Are you sure?" Rose asked. "You'd be practically declaring war on Torchwood. Acting against Torchwood's interests on this side is considered treason."

"We don't need to go in guns blazing," he said. "This would be so much easier if I had a sonic device, but there isn't time..."

"What's the plan?" Rose asked.

"I'm working on it," he assured her.

...

The other Alex came to collect Ginger from the holding cell.

"Transport's ready," she said. "Up."

Soldiers grabbed Ginger roughly by the shoulder and hoisted her to her feet.

"I told you I'd do anything you say," Ginger said. "This is overkill."

"Overkill is necessary for your kind," the other Alex replied. "Underkill, where you're concerned, is a fatal mistake for anyone foolish enough not to triple check that you're handled."

"You're so different," Ginger said as they marched her along the hallway. "What happened to you?"

"Don't pretend you don't know."

"I don't," she said. "Seriously, it's a little scary."

"Good."

Ginger was led onto the roof, where a specialized aircraft was waiting. It was jet black and boxy with hexagonal panels all over the exterior. Helicopter blades sat idly on top.

"Do you like the design?" Alex asked. "Specialized to be impossible for your kind to escape. You might recognize the design as being modeled after your old ship with a few modifications."

"I don't know what you mean," Ginger said.

The other Alex activated her com device. "Power up the safety net," she said.

A humming noise began, first softly, then almost becoming overwhelming.

"Get the prisoner inside!" the other Alex shouted.

The soldiers pushed Ginger toward the chopper and almost had her in the door before something sparked in one of the panels and the noise stopped.

"What the hell was that?" the other Alex asked. "Report!"

"Sorry, Madam Director," said a soldier from inside the cockpit. "The safety net appears to be malfunctioning. Our fuel tank also appears to have a rupture. We'll need at least an hour to fix it."

The other Alex was seized by a terrible rage as she rushed toward Ginger and turned her roughly to face her. "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything!" Ginger said. "Honestly!"

"You did something!" she insisted. "What is this? Some sort of trap? Who's helping you? Is it that fool of a Doctor you're manipulating?"

"I'm not manipulating anyone, honestly!" Ginger said. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

The other Alex looked for a moment like she might slap Ginger, but thought better of it. "Get her back to her cell! Quickly! And somebody fix my damn ship!"

...

"What did you do?" she asked as she arrived in the med lab. "Hm? Which one of you did it?"

"Did what?" the Doctor asked. "We've been right here the whole time."

"Don't play stupid with me," she hissed. "I know you well enough by now to know when you're lying to me."

The question that had been weighing on the Doctor's mind finally had an answer. He tilted his head. "Now see, that's interesting, because I've never met you in my life-"

"Because you're young," she said. "Don't change the subject."

"That's one possible answer," the Doctor said. "The other is that this is a parallel world. I'm not from here. I only just arrived a few hours ago, shortly before that woman downstairs did. So if you've met me before, it wasn't me." He took a few steps forward so he could stare her right in the face. "Where is he? My doppelganger? I demand answers and if you're not going to give them to me then I demand to speak to him."

The other Alex could see that he was being quite serious. "I'm afraid that isn't possible."

He raised his eyebrows. "Why not?" he asked.

"I'm not at liberty to say."

"You're the Director of Torchwood," Rose said. "In this universe, that's basically like being president of the world. If you're not at liberty to say, that means there's someone above you. Who is it?"

Alex didn't answer or look away from the Doctor. He understood.

"So I'm pulling the strings over here," he said. "From where?"

"You don't understand," she said. "You only pull some of the strings."

"Which ones?"

"The ones about Gingers. You don't get it. Helping her is very bad. She'll take full advantage of you."

"I'd like to be the judge of that myself," he said. "I may not be in charge over here, but I'd like to see the prisoner. You can stand guard at all times, if you must. But I need to know what's going on. She seems to think we have some sort of connection. If we do, it's possible that I can get her to talk."

"It's against protocol," Alex said. "I could get strung up for this. She can make you dangerous."

"I'll take full responsibility," he said. "I'm not what you think I am. No TARDIS, no sonic, only one heart. How dangerous can she really make me?"

...

They waited patiently in the corridor while Alex made a quick phone call. Since Jackie wasn't a member of Torchwood, she hadn't been permitted near the holding cell. This turned out to be a good thing, because it gave Rose a chance to ask what was on her mind.

"Doctor?" she said softly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything," he said.

"What's that word she said before?" she asked. "Not the ones you've already explained. The one you're deliberately avoiding."

She could see something like fear in his eyes, but still his smiled warmly at her. "You know me too well, Rose Tyler."

"Well," she said. "I know you well enough to know when something's bothering you. So what was it? She said it to you back when she first woke up and the way you reacted..."

" _Wysaella,"_ he said. "It's a sort of...Well, that's why she said we're quantum entangled."

"Sorry, science stuff goes over my head a bit," she said. "What's that mean?"

"It means we're linked," he said. "Across space and time."

"What like if she dies, you die or something?"

He smiled. "Nothing so mystical. Though I suppose it is in a way. Everyone's got a specific life-giving energy. Humans would call it a soul, but it's something far more primal than that. It's not a carried consciousness, there's no sort of reincarnation. It's simply an energy. Something that was created at the start of this universe and will last til the end, flowing from organism to organism. This energy is so small that it's impossible to see unless you have exactly the right equipment. It's said a person's aura comes from it. But when it's created in a burst of energy from a star, it splits into two atoms. These two drift apart across the universe, becoming what they will. They almost never meet again because there are so many lifeforms in the universe that the chances of this energy becoming the same species is astronomically small. But occasionally they do. These people are called _Wysaella._ They meet and immediately form an intense bond that will last forever, because something in them recognizes the other."

Rose's heart sank. "Sounds a bit like a soulmate."

He nodded reluctantly. "Well, maybe a bit. It's not always romantic though. Fry and Laurie are _Wysaella."_

She couldn't help but laugh. "You're having me on."

"I'm not!" he grinned. "It's completely true! The people who normally get tested for this sort of thing tend to be romantic, but that doesn't speak to what percentage of this group actually are. I heard of one rare case where it was a mother and daughter, and that was all completely above board."

Rose smiled for a moment longer before it faded. "And you don't think we're this... _Wysaella_ thing? You and me?"

He looked at her sadly for a moment before shaking his head. "I'm sorry, but I don't. If you'd asked me before, maybe I would've said yes. It's a very romantic thing to say. But now...I can _feel_ that she's telling the truth. There's a connection there that I can't explain. It's like I know her, even though I know I don't. But I want you to know something, Rose. That doesn't take away at all from how I feel about you. I love you and nothing will change that." He watched as her eyes widened in shock. "Oh sorry, did I say the wrong thing?"

A tentative grin spread across her face. "No! No you didn't. You said exactly the right thing. I'm just...not used to hearing you say it yet. That you love me." She looked away shyly. "It's sort of nice."

He watched her and couldn't help but smile as well. "Yeah?"

She lifted her eyes to his and thought that she might never have been happier in her life. "Yeah."

The large metal door opened with a loud clang.

"Pat him down," Alex said. "Make sure he doesn't smuggle anything in. No sonic probes, no weaponry, not even so much as a bleedin' paperclip, you understand me? If she gets her hooks in him and convinces him to let her escape, we don't want him having anything on hand to help him."

Soldiers began patting down the Doctor.

"Oi!" he protested. "Hands! Blimey, buy me a drink first!" She shot a toothy grin at Rose who rolled her eyes and looked away to hide a smile. He looked back at Alex. "So I take it I've been cleared?"

"Don't give me reason to change my mind," she said. 

"I really think we're doing the right thing here," he said in a low voice. "There's something going on that we don't understand. Something that _she_ doesn't understand."

Alex's expression was unreadable. "Let me ask you something," Alex said. "I asked around, and it seems you're telling the truth. You're not from here. You don't even have a bloody ship. The basic clearing scans we did on you revealed evidence of a metacrisis, which shouldn't be possible. I even considered at first that you could be trying to trick us with a chameleon circuit, but I haven't found any evidence of that whatsoever. You check out." She nodded at Rose. "That means she found you. I know you were her first priority for these last few years working for us. I didn't expect she'd ever find you, but working on that goal kept her motivated, which kept her useful. She cares about you. Do you care about her?"

He was angry that she'd even suggest such a thing. "Of course I do," he said in a low voice. "That's why I'm here."

"Then I'd suggest leaving well enough alone and going off with her. Seriously, you don't want to be wrapped up in this. Go live your full human lives away from all this. I'll even offer you witness protection-"

"Witness protection?" he repeated. "What could be so bad that we'd need witness protection?"

"She's seen you now," she said. "She won't stop. But fine. If you really insist on going in to talk to this woman, I won't stop you. But don't say I didn't warn you. You may think you'll do anything for Rose Tyler, but that creature in there will utterly destroy your sense of self and have you crossing lines you'd never go near. You're human now and won't regenerate, so I promise you this: If I see any signs of trouble and think she's getting to you, I will shoot you down rather than let you become a danger in this universe."

"That's your duty as a Torchwood agent?" he asked solemnly.

"That is what Torchwood was created for," she said. "But it's also a personal matter."

"I thought it might be. So." He gestured to the door. "Lead the way."

She took a deep breath. "Curiosity killed the cat, Doctor."

"But satisfaction brought it back," he said.

"Yes, I know," she said. "That's exactly the problem."

...

The Doctor was allowed into the holding cell while Rose had to stay outside and watch through a screen. She caught his sleeve as he was about to walk inside.

"Doctor?"

He could see that she was worried about him as she kissed his cheek. 

"Come back to me?" she said, her voice trembling slightly with worry.

"That's a promise," he said gravely.

...

The first thing he noticed is that she was trembling. She sat in her cell with her hair falling in her face and her eyes closed. She looked utterly dejected.

"If you've come to ask me more questions," she said in a low voice. "I've already told you, I don't know anything."

"I sincerely doubt that's true," he said.

Her eyes snapped open, but she didn't dare to look up. He could tell that she was trying not to hope. "Doctor," she said. "To what do I owe this visit? No don't tell me...This is a death row visit."

"I hope not," he said. "But I couldn't say for sure. I'd think that's up to you."

"So what are you waiting for?" she asked. "You want me to make my intimidating villain speech? Try on some seduction? Because that kinda thing's only fun when I know you're also in on the joke."

"Which is?"

She wasn't in the mood to talk about what used to be, so she changed the subject. "I don't want to hurt you, Doctor. Honestly, I can't. The idea of anything happening to even one of you..."

He watched her closely. "She said you'd try to manipulate me."

"I wouldn't on purpose. My disorder makes it so it's second nature. But I've been working on it. I'm always honest with you, Doctor. It took me a long time to trust you, but I'm honest now."

"She said you'd make me dangerous."

He could see the pain in her eyes as she answered. "That may very well be true. But again, it's not intentional."

"There's only one Gallifreyan I've ever known who could make me dangerous," he said accusatorily.

She finally looked at him. "Don't go there," she said. "I'm not him."

"You said you didn't escape the Time War-"

"And I didn't!" she snapped. "I had nothing to do with that! Look, I don't blame you for thinking that. You're supposed to. That's the point. But I'm not Koschei. Please don't compare me to him. I've worked so hard..."

"Koschei," he repeated. "How do you know that name?"

"Because you _told_ me!" she insisted. "When they say I make you dangerous, it's not because of some scheme or evil plan. It's because of what I mean to you. And I wish it wasn't true. I wish it wasn't. But I know it is. Because I think I made mine dangerous."

"What do you mean?"

"He changed me. I was so different, I was...I dunno. I guess you could compare it to diffusing a bomb. Or maybe I'm not as sharp around the edges. But I'm afraid that I changed him too."

"Changed him how?"

She swallowed. "He made me a therapist."

He hadn't expected this. "You're a therapist?"

"No, that's now what I...I mean he _literally made_ a therapist. For me. She's an android. She's great. But she's got weapons systems. You know how much he hates weapons. But he did that to protect me. Because he wasn't going to leave me undefended. I'm afraid that when it comes to me, he's much more willing to go too far. As I am for him, I suppose. But it makes me wonder." She took a shaky breath and willed herself not to cry. "He saw me disappear into thin air right in front of him. So it makes me wonder..."

"How far he's willing to go to get you back," he finished for her. "You said you had someone to get back to."

She nodded and closed her eyes. She leaned her head against the wall. "And now I'll probably never see him again..."

He frowned. "You're in pain."

She winced. "It's the magnets. I was..." She took a sharp breath and hung her head. "You should be looking at whoever sold me out."

"What?"

"They arrived far too quickly," she said. "They think I'm someone I'm not, so I'm guessing they have an alert protocol for my description. Find whoever or whatever told them I'm here." She guessed the reason for his silence. "You don't have to tell me who it is. I know how dangerous they say I am. I understand why you don't trust me. I'm just saying, it's a good question."

He considered it for a moment. "It is."

"My money's on Quest, personally. Guy's barely said three words to me this whole time, but unless there's someone else here that I don't know about or some kind of bloody Ginger detector lying around, then he's the only logical explanation." Her breathing was pained and ragged. "You know the best part is this is probably what I deserve. Being locked away might be the best thing for everyone. I agree that I have things to atone for. I'll own up to what I've done wrong, I just resent being charged with crimes I _didn't_ commit..."

The Doctor thought he recognized the look on her face. "It's not just physical pain, is it? The magnets remind you of something. Something traumatic."

A few tears leaked from her eyes as she nodded. "I can't stop hearing you screaming...That's worse than the pain. You can do whatever you like to me, but you can't hurt him. Having these magnets on me now, it's just a painful reminder. I guess you're my weakness. But everyone knows that."

He watched her for a moment before pressing the button to let himself out of the room.

He waited until the door closed before speaking. "She's in pain."

"That's the point," Alex said. "Don't get sentimental."

His eyebrows shot up. "Sentimental? This is basic empathy!"

"You can't extend empathy to a Ginger," she said dismissively. "It'll be the worst mistake you ever make."

"Everyone deserves empathy!" he protested. "You speak of her as if she's a monster, but monsters are created by refusing empathy-"

"Yeah, yeah, save me the nature-nurture debate, Doctor," she replied. "She's a full-grown woman, capable of making her own choices. Problem is, she doesn't make good ones."

"What's this thing with the magnets?" he asked her. "Besides cruelty, I mean."

"It somehow inhibits her abilities," she replied. "The pain is merely a side-effect."

"And you hope to gain what from this? Evidence? A confession of some sort? Because torture doesn't bring reliable results. Everyone knows that people will say anything just to make the pain stop."

"She won't crack," Alex said. "She's a Ginger. This is the only way to keep us safe. This is exactly why I didn't want you to see her. You over-empathize with her. She'll use that against you. I hope you got what you wanted out of this, because you're absolutely forbidden from seeing her again. Don't even _think_ about arguing with me, Doctor, this is for your own good. _I'm_ in charge here, not you."

He glared at her for a moment. "You may be right that I have no power here. I don't know how this world works yet. But don't presume that you can scare me off that easily."

"Is that a threat?"

"Should it be? Tell me something, Director. I came through the last rupture between this universe and mine. How do you know she hasn't done the same? How do you know she's not an innocent?"

"Because Gingers can't be innocents. Don't go down this path, Doctor. Best case scenario, she gets you killed and destroys the universe by accident."

"And the worst case?"

"She does it on purpose."

Alex strode off toward the outer doors. "Make sure this place is secured," she said as she left. "And remove the Doctor and his companion. Under no circumstances are they allowed contact with the prisoner."

...

"So what are we supposed to do?" Rose asked once they were back in the medical lab. "Disabling their aircraft was a smart move, but it'll only delay them for so long."

The Doctor was still hung up on something Alex had said. "Rose, have you ever heard any stories about Gingers?"

"No," she said. "Not that I can think of."

"Because she's saying this all like it's proven fact. Like it's something everyone should know."

"Maybe we should ask someone who's from here," Jackie said. She nodded at Quest, who was attending to equipment at the opposite end of the room. "Could get a better read that way."

"Might be a good idea," the Doctor said. 

"No, let me," Rose said. "I know him better, he might talk to me."

"Forgot to ask how you two know each other," he said. "Ginger did raise a good point about him being the only person here who could've reported her whereabouts."

"I mean it's not like we're friends," she said. "I've just been around Torchwood long enough to see him around, you know? So I can't speak to if he would or wouldn't do that."

"Alright," the Doctor said. "Ask him then. See what you can get. But be careful."

Rose smiled at him for a moment before waltzing over to him and leaning against the table in front of him. "Hey Quest?" she said. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Miss Tyler," he said.

"Please, call me Rose," she said. 

"I-"

Rose finished his sentence for him. "Prefer Miss Tyler, I know. You're so determined to keep emotional distance."

"Did you have a question?"

"Yeah," she said. "What's the deal with all this security? I mean, does the Director really need this many body guards?"

"The Director can handle herself. The security is to keep the prisoner contained."

"Right. Like what's her deal, anyway?"

"Whose? The Director or the prisoner?"

"Both."

"Well you know all about the Director, don't you?"

"I've met her once before. Is she always super serious or does she just not like me?"

"She has a lot to be serious about. I mean you know her family was murdered."

"I didn't."

He finally looked up from his work. "But you have to know the story. It's very famous."

"Sorry, I'm not from here. Can you tell it to me?"

"Alex Mitchell's parents were Torchwood agents, so she was practically Torchwood royalty from birth. Then her parents were murdered in front of her when she was barely old enough to walk. She was raised as a child of Torchwood ever since."

"How horrible. Did they ever catch the murderer?"

"No, but you see, that's the kicker. The same thing that murdered her parents came back a few years ago and killed her fiancé."

"Fiancé? The Director was engaged?"

"It was all over the news."

"But why would someone do something like that?"

"Nobody knows. All further details of the case are classified."

"Right. So about this prisoner...?"

"I know, right? I mean, I never thought it would be me."

"So you _did_ turn her in?"

He nodded. "But don't tell anyone, alright? She's highest priority dangerous. The file says she could retaliate."

"Who is she?"

"I don't know."

"But you turned her in?"

"All outpost captains know that's protocol. Specified red hair, green eyes, two hearts. Did you hear the stuff she was saying about the clock? That was in the file too. The clock purposely runs slow so we can know for sure."

"But what did she do?"

"That's classified."

"Oh come on, you can tell me..."

"No I mean, it's way above my paygrade. I don't know what crime she committed, I just know she's at the top of the most wanted list. Literally. There is no higher priority target. We're told not to engage, just to call for reinforcements."

"Right."

"Did you have another question?"

"No. Thanks."

Quest got back to work and Rose rejoined the Doctor and Jackie at the other side of the room. 

"So she's being charged for a crime and we don't even know what it is," the Doctor said. 

"There has to be a way we can find out," Jackie said.

"I have some Torchwood clearance on this side," Rose said. "I could do some digging in the database. There should be a computer in the rec room. Let's go."

...

The rec room was very sparsely decorated. It wasn't a space that had been used especially often in the months since the rest of the outpost team had been reassigned. A flatscreen terminal was built into a far wall. Rose headed for that.

"Enter command code," said the mechanical voice of the computer at the same time as the words flashed to the screen.

"E-reader software," Rose explained. "Helpful user interface for the visually impaired. You can either input the numbers manually or..." She cleared her throat and stood up straighter. "Agent Rose Tyler, command code 76 dash 92."

The swirling blue screen lit up green before clearing to a black one. 

"Welcome, Rose Tyler," the computer said. "What can I help you with today?"

"We're looking into a prisoner being held at outpost one," Rose said. 

"There is no prisoner at outpost one."

Rose blinked. "I don't understand."

"There are no intake forms indicating a prisoner is held at outpost one."

"But there is one," Rose insisted. "She's scheduled to be moved-"

"There are no prisoner transfer forms from any facility today," the computer said helpfully.

"That doesn't make any sense," Rose whispered.

"I don't know the protocols here, Rose," the Doctor said. "But if I'm guessing right, there's no records on file. And there should be."

"Yeah," Rose said. "Intake paperwork is meant to be filed immediately upon booking. Everything is clearly documented. It's a transparency measure."

"Sounds to me like a cover up," Jackie said.

"Yes, Jackie, I was about to say the same thing," the Doctor said. 

Jackie crossed her arms. "Why would they book her in secret, and not tell anyone anything. then not file proper paperwork unless they were covering something up?" 

"It's an excellent point," Rose said. 

"Is there anything else I can help you with, Agent Tyler?" asked the computer.

"Agent Tyler," the Doctor said under his breath. "I'll never get used to that."

A flicker of a smile crossed her face in spite of herself. She shoved him playfully. "Shut up." She cleared her throat and addressed the computer seriously again. "Yes. I need you to pull up some files."

"Accessing database," the computer said. "What information do you require?"

"I need the criminal record of a Miss Ginger...Eh..." She'd already forgotten her last name.

Luckily the Doctor had not. "Roswell," he added helpfully. "She said her name was Ginger Roswell."

"Roswell, right," Rose said. "Computer, bring up a file on Miss Ginger Roswell."

"File does not exist," the computer said.

Rose was beginning to get a very bad feeling about all of this. "It has to. There's no way there's just no file."

"I'm gonna call your father," Jackie said. "See if he can sort this all out."

"Good idea," Rose said.

...

"So what you're telling me is you can access the file either," Rose said.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," Pete Tyler said. "But nothing with those search parameters is coming up on my end either. This whole thing's beginning to smell rotten from my end too."

The Doctor reentered the room and Rose waved him over.

"So when will you be here?" she asked.

"Soon as the swarm clears," Pete said. "Weather station said it could be another hour or so."

"Right," Jackie said. "Be careful."

She hung up the phone and Rose turned to the Doctor. "What've you got there?"

The Doctor was putting the finishing touches on some crude device. "Got bored of waiting," he said. "I could just try to slow hack my way through your systems, but I figure your terminal has to be more advanced and would set off an alarm if I started tampering all willy-nilly."

"So..." Rose said. "What's the plan then?"

Jackie peered at the piece of tech he had in his hands. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd almost think that was your sonic whatsit."

He popped a panel into place on the side. "That's _screwdriver_ ," he said with a crooked grin.

Rose couldn't help but laugh fondly. "That's what you've been doing all this time? Building yourself a new screwdriver?"

"It's not as good as my old one," he admitted. "But it'll do in a pinch. I just need it to breach the outer systems and I can do the rest."

"Do you need me to activate the computer?" Rose asked.

"Don't bother," he said.

He strode over to the terminal and aimed the crude cylinder at it. The new sonic whirred a bit, but the light flickered. The Doctor shook it.

"C'mon," he groaned through gritted teeth. "I know you can do it, come on..."

It finally flickered into life and the blue computer screen turned black.

"Accessing file systems," it said. "What would you like to know?"

"We'd like files on Ginger Roswell," Rose said.

"File does not exist."

"Maybe we need to amend our search parameters," the Doctor said. "Computer, clear the previous search. Find primary protocol for outpost one. What should be done if a red-haired woman enters the facility?"

"Primary protocol states that the outpost officer in charge must ascertain whether she has two hearts. If so, monitor her to know if she recognizes that the clocks are set 8 seconds slow. If so, contact HQ. Do not engage. Suspect is dangerous and of the highest priority."

"Why?"

"Classified."

The Doctor aimed the sonic at the screen once more. 

"Accessing files. What is your question?"

"Who is this protocol enacted to protect us from?"

"Multiple subjects are relevant to this question."

"In broad terms then."

"Gingers."

"What are Gingers?"

"Gingers are a group of interdimensional beings, origin and species unknown. They appear similar in anatomical structure to Time Lords."

The Doctor remembered something that Alex had said. "They're a terrorist group?"

"No. They work alone."

"But they're a group?"

"Not an organized group. They are doppelgangers of each other."

"I see. And what are the charges against them?"

"Of the known Gingers, all are known or suspected to have committed murder in the first degree."

"And what of this one?"

"Which one?"

"The one in the basement?"

"Unclear parameters. There is no rendition paperwork on file indicating that a Ginger has been captured."

"Would there be?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Secrecy is important to avoid escape."

Rose had an idea. "Read us the charges from the Ginger from this universe."

The Doctor beamed at her. He liked it when she stepped up and had good ideas.

"Unclear parameters," said the computer.

"They're doppelgangers, right? That's alternate universe versions? So bring us the charges against the one from this universe."

"There is a doppelganger in this universe, but she isn't listed as a Ginger."

"Why not?"

"Unknown. She is classified differently in the records."

"What are the charges against her?"

"Multiple homicide, conspiracy to commit terrorism, war crimes, acts of genocide, dimensional destabilization-"

"Dimensional destabilization?" the Doctor repeated. "That's impossible. We wouldn't be standing here if she'd collapsed the universe!"

"Not of this universe," the computer responded. "Though she did conspire to destabilize this universe as well before she was stopped. The file also indicates that she travelled interdimensionally without a permit."

He squinted in disbelief. "A _permit_? Who has a _permit_ for interdimensional travel? It's impossible to cross without breaking the universe!"

"Unclear. The file only specifies that the crime was committed, it does not specify how."

But Rose had something else on her mind. "So is Ginger her name then? It's how she introduced herself, but you talk like it's a classification."

"Ginger is her most common alias," the computer replied. "In most realities, she picks that one."

"So she's classified based on that commonality," the Doctor said. "So are we meant to understand she doesn't use that alias in this universe?"

"File indicates that she has only been identified as a Ginger when in disguise as a doppelganger."

"That would explain the suspicion, I guess," Rose said.

"But what is she classified as in this universe?" the Doctor pressed. "Who is she if not a Ginger? What is her name?"

"According to the original Torchwood charter, after the murder of Queen Victoria and the subsequent attempted overthrow of the British monarchy, she identified herself as-"

The power went out.

...

Down in the subbasement, Alex Mitchell noticed the power failure.

"Impossible," she said. She opened the outer door to glare at Ginger. "What is this? What did you do?"

"Me?" Ginger said indignantly. "I didn't do anything! I've been here the entire time!"

"Was this your plan all along?" Alex screamed. "Lure me here so you can finish me off then make your escape?"

"I don't know what you're _talking_ about-"

Alex motioned to the guards. "If you think I'm making the mistake of letting you out of my sight, you're mistaken. We're going topside. You're coming with us, where I can keep an eye on you."

...

"Doctor?" Rose said. "What's going on? Did we blow a fuse or something?"

Jackie peered out the window. "I don't think it was us."

"Whatchu mean?"

"Come see."

The Doctor and Rose moved cautiously to the window. 

"Hold on, it was day a minute ago," the Doctor said. "When did it get so dark?"

"It didn't," Jackie said. "It's a swarm."

Shiny black creatures were zooming all around the outpost, emitting a buzzing noise that was something fierce as they encircled the compound and blotted out the sun.

"I've never seen this many of them before," Rose said. "Were they on the forecast?"

"No," Jackie said. "Your father said they were over the Channel. He would've said if they were supposed to be here."

"What's going on?" the Doctor said. "You mentioned that before. What are they? Where did they come from?"

"Nobody knows," Rose said. "They just sort of appeared one day. They're harmless, they just sort of fly about."

"And you can't get rid of them? No pesticides or anything?"

"Well they don't really eat anything," Rose explained. "They don't even land."

"What kind of insects don't eat anything?"

"I dunno."

"Unless they're not insects," said a voice.

They turned to the door to see the path blocked by a squadron of armed soldiers with Alex and Ginger in the center.

Jackie stepped forward. "You just stay away from my daughter," she said fiercely. "We know all about you. We say your file!"

Ginger was hurt by the implication. "Whatever it said, I didn't do it. I wouldn't hurt you, I promise."

"Ha," Alex said. "You wouldn't hurt the person that stands between you and the Doctor? That's a first."

"I wouldn't," she protested. "I'm not who you think I am."

"What do you mean, unless they're not insects?" the Doctor asked.

"Well seems almost logical," Ginger said. "There was something on Black Mirror where, like, they had to create little mechanical pollinators. It's possible that these are mechanical drones."

"Yes. _Yes_! That makes sense!"

"Very good," Alex said. "But now it's too late. One of them has spotted you. This is exactly why I wanted to move you."

"So you knew about this?" Rose asked. "All the news stations acting like they're actual bugs and you know they're not."

"It's part of an extradition deal," Alex explained. "They blame the Doctor for what happened in the Venutian Incident. We couldn't talk them out of it." She glared at Ginger. "We _know_ it was you shifting the blame off yourself, but they wouldn't listen to reason. They dispatched mechanical drones to Earth to scan for the Timelord if he ever returned. Which he's not stupid enough to, of course."

"Where is he?" the Doctor asked. "I demand to speak with him!"

"That's impossible," Alex said.

Ginger laughed darkly under her breath. "Please, don't tell me he William Bell-ed himself."

"I don't know what that means," Alex said. "But it's too late. It wouldn't be a big deal if the swarm had just found you. But a version of the Doctor is here. That complicates things. They're coming. There's no way out because the swarm blocks all outgoing signals. We can't even teleport out."

"So what's the problem?" Ginger asked. "Just hand me over to them then! If it saves everyone else-"

"It's forbidden," Alex said firmly. "I can't let you out of my custody. But was this your plan all along? Alert a swarm, hurt a Doctor in the crossfire? Use them to make an escape?"

"You need to stop assuming I'm that clever," Ginger said.

A small metallic winged insect flew into the room and opened its mouth. "Good evening," it said in a hollow, tinny voice. "By order of the Venutian High Counsel, we demand you release the fugitive Doctor into our custody. A delegation will be there to greet you shortly."

Alex swatted the drone to death with a book. "There's no way I'm letting her out of my sight!" she said. "I'm under orders. Bring her with me! We need to hide her!"

The others followed close behind as Ginger was roughly pulled from the room.

"Hang on!" the Doctor said. "I still don't understand what's happening here!"

"What's happening is I'm being punished for something I didn't _do_!" Ginger said. "Let me ask you something, Alex. How do they know the Doctor's here?"

"They did a scan and found someone with two hearts. Nobody's ever seen the Doctor, so that's the best evidence they have to go on - especially since they know he can change his face."

"Yeah, well, that's not him, is it? They're here for me. Why not just let me go in his place?"

"No," the Doctor said. "That's out of the question."

"Don't be so easily manipulated, Doctor," Alex said. "She's not doing this out of the goodness of her hearts."

"I'm serious!" Ginger said. "You're trying to hide me so you can avoid handing me over. Then what? Execute me? Stick me in a cell somewhere? At least this way I'm doing some good. If the Venutians think they have the Doctor, then they'll call off the swarm. They'd have no reason to suspect they have the wrong person." There was the sound of a spaceship docking on the roof. "You'd better decide now."

"It's against orders," Alex said. "I'm not letting you out of my sight."

"I won't let you risk your life," the Doctor said. "At least let me-"

"Do what?" Ginger asked. "Hm? You've got one heart and no regenerations. You've got a whole life ahead of you with Rose, which I know is what you've always wanted. There's nothing you can do. Let me give you a chance. Because you're the Doctor, but you're not the one they're looking for." She glared at Alex. "Just like I'm not the Ginger you think I am."

"What makes you think you can just pretend to be me?" the Doctor asked. "They'll see right through that!"

"I can do a pretty convincing Doctor impersonation," she insisted. She winked at Rose in that cocky way the Doctor always used to and adopted an English accent. "Isn't that right, Rose?"

The Doctor frowned. "What does that mean?"

"Nothing," Rose said. "Don't worry about it."

Ginger switched back to her normal Scottish accent. "Point is, I'm a bloody fantastic actress. And more than that, I know you. Better than almost anyone. I've got this."

The outer doors opened and a squadron of Venutian soldiers in shiny black helmets entered the room.

"Which one of you is the Doctor?" the leader asked.

"I am," the Doctor said.

Ginger switched back to the English accent. "No he's not. He's trying to protect me, but scan him! You'll see he only has one heart! Unlike me."

The leader held out an arm and scanned them both with a blue light that emanated from a wrist strap. "Scans indicate positive ID on fugitive," he said. 

"So take me," Ginger said. 

"These are your companions?"

"Yeah," she said. "Eh, Wesley Wyndham-Price and Debbie Harry. Leave them alone. They did nothing wrong. They're not involved."

The leader noticed that Ginger was still gripped tightly by the Torchwood soldiers. "Release the Doctor into our custody at once."

"Absolutely not!" Alex protested. "I'm not letting her out of my sight-"

"Apologies, gentlemen," Ginger said. "You know how some companions get sometimes. Bit clingy."

"I see," the leader said. "This is your current human mate? Records indicate the Doctor sometimes chooses human females for romantic entanglements."

"What?" Alex said. "I'm not-"

"Yeah, that's right," Ginger said. "Human mate or whatever you wish to call it. So let her go. I'll be very angry if any harm comes to her whatsoever."

Alex glared at her. "I swear to God-"

Ginger chuckled nervously, but covered it with a plastered-on fake grin. "Don't argue with me, honeybunch," she muttered out of the corner of her mouth. "I know what's best."

The leader didn't speak for a moment. "Indicate to the ship that we'll need immediate transmat. We'll be bringing the Doctor and three prisoners."

"What?" Ginger said. "No, I said to leave them out of this!"

"The companions are always trouble when left on their own," the leader said. "This way, we can keep an eye on you."

Alex sidled up to Ginger. "See?" she muttered. "This is why you should've let me handle this, _honeybunch._ You've gone and created another international incident."

"So what do we do?" Ginger asked. "Fight back?"

"We can't or things'll escalate," she said. "We surrender. For now."

Alex took Ginger's arm and escorted her towards the Venutians. The Doctor and Rose walked toward them with their hands up.

"Wait hold on!" said Jackie from the back of the room. "Where do you think you're taking them?"

But it was too late. The transmat was activated and they were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I know the world is kind of sinking deeper into chaos, but I hope everyone's staying safe out there. As of this posting, we're two days away from Inauguration Day and I'm hearing rumors that Nazis are about to make an actual real-world appearance. So if anyone's reading this, please stay safe out there.


	25. I Can't Do It Alone

**Our World**

The inside of the spaceship was dark and cold. 

"You may step out of your containment pods and approach," said a voice. 

They became aware of a large metal throne positioned some distance away. Upon it was a tall being with shiny bronze skin and yellow eyes. His tunic was made of a reflective silvery material.

"Wait," said one guard. "Scans indicate that one passenger is an android." 

Yellow light sprang up around Thea. It was clear that she was being contained in an energy field.

"What are you doing to her?" asked Nova.

"I am perfectly safe," Thea said brightly. "Though I do think it would be unwise of me to take action at this time."

The Doctor focused on the figure on the throne. "I take it you're the king?" he asked.

"He's not so impressive," Alex muttered. She thought since Ginger wasn't there, it was her duty to pick up with the anti-monarchical sentiment.

A guard posted nearby seemed to take offense to this. "You will kneel before Karvillian VI."

"Right, yeah, of course," Alex said. "Later maybe. We're here to make a case for Earth."

"The case, as you say, is closed, Earth child," Karvillian said in a low, rumbling voice.

Alex bristled. "Don't know who you're calling a _child,_ mate-"

The Doctor knew that now was not the time to be losing their tempers. "What she means is we're here to negotiate."

"We have already been quite clear on our terms," Karvillian said. "Our princess for your species."

"Yeah," the Doctor said. "I'd say that's clear." He turned to the others. "Wouldn't you say those terms are clear?" The others nodded. "Perfectly crystal."

"So where is Princess Hahmidecta?" 

"Well you see, there's the problem," the Doctor said. "We don't exactly have her."

" _Lies._ She is on your planet."

Alex was struck with sudden inspiration. "Is she, though?"

She stepped off her transport pod and approached the throne. The others fell into step behind her. 

"Of course she is-"

"Do you have any proof?" Alex demanded as she stopped before the throne. "It's a big world and we've been searching everywhere we could think of. It's possible we missed something, but the other option is that it's a big universe. Who's to say she's even on our planet?"

"We received a note."

"Did you?" the Doctor asked. "Can I see it?"

Karvillian stared him down for a moment before nodding. A guard approached him with a wooden tablet.

"No, see, this is just impossible," the Doctor said. "This is written in perfect Neridian. No human would be able to translate that." He saw how Jack shifted uncomfortably. "Present company excluded."

"Which proves my point," Alex said. "You're just assuming the note is legit. What are the motives?"

"The note isn't very clear on this point," the Doctor said. "The kidnappers come off more as thrill seekers who are just excited to actually get away with it."

"Sounds like Earthlings," said Karvillian. 

"Not gonna argue on that point," said Jack. "But Earth in this time period doesn't have access to the kinds of advanced spacecrafts that would get them to your galaxy. With very few exceptions, humans don't leave Earth."

"It's most likely a frame job," Alex said. "Point you at the Earth to get you to do their dirty work."

"My daughter is missing," said Karvillian. "And you want to come to me with unfounded conspiracy theories?"

"We'd like to help you find your daughter," Sarah Jane said. "But you have to let us help you."

"We have a ship," Alex said. "It can travel in time as well as in space. Let us use it to find out what really happened to your daughter."

"You will not leave this ship," said Karvillian.

"It's a good plan," said Sarah Jane. "Very logically sound. We can find out what happened and get her back to you safely."

"Please," the Doctor said. "Don't threaten the Earth. Those people down there are innocent. They can't help you. We can."

Karvillian considered his options. "We will keep some of you as collateral. Three of you may go. The rest will stay."

"Doctor," Sarah Jane said. "You should take Alex and Nova. We'll stay behind-"

Karvillian stood up at once. "You are a doctor?"

" _The_ Doctor," the Doctor corrected him.

"But your species of origin is Earth?"

"No," he said slowly. "I'm simply here to mediate."

Karvillian took a moment to consider his options. "You will not leave this ship. You will delegate someone else to pilot your vessel."

"What?" the Doctor said. "No, I won't do that-"

"Doctor, I can do it," Alex said. "You taught me how to pilot the TARDIS. I can take Nova and Sarah Jane and we can sort this out."

"I don't like it."

"Then I'll stay with you," Sarah Jane said. "You and Nova go, Alex. But take Thea. She'll protect you."

Alex implored him with her eyes to understand. "It's a sound plan. Let me do this."

He looked at her for a moment. "Alright," he said. "But take no unnecessary risks, you got that? If you find something, report back here. Don't go off on your own, Torchwood."

She tried to smile reassuringly, but just ended up looking worried. "Is that a direct order?"

"Bit of fatherly advice," he said.

She swallowed and turned back to Karvillian. "I can pilot the ship. I will take the other human girl and the android."

"You're running out of time," Karvillian cautioned. "Return to your transport pods and prepare for transmat. If the rest of you even so much as move, I'll have you executed on the spot."

Sarah Jane took Alex by the shoulders. "You can do this."

Alex smiled. "Surprised you're not pitching a fit trying to come with me."

"I would if I thought it would do you any good," she said. "I'll do more good here with your father and your uncle. Thea is no good here, but she can be help to you down there. I made a call."

She nodded and hugged her before hugging Jack.

He patted her firmly on the back. "I'm so proud of you, Podling."

She smiled. "Jack, you haven't used that nickname for me in ages. Thought you were finally over that one."

"Never over a classic," he said. 

"You're wasting time, Earth Child," said Karvillian. "You have a deadline."

"Quite a pun," the Doctor said under his breath. "Of course Nerideens have no concept of wordplay-" He turned to his right, expecting Ginger to be there to appreciate that and was immediately let down by the reality of the situation. He made a mental note to tell her later.

"I'm going, I'm going," Alex said. "Nova, with me."

The two of them returned to their transport pods, which really looked more like circles drawn into the floor than actual pods. Within seconds, they were returned to Sarah Jane's attic.


	26. Consider This

**Pete's World**

"Present for decontamination."

Ginger and the assorted humans were roughly passed into a decontamination chamber on the spaceship. Ginger was detained only one moment.

"What are the purpose of these?" the guard asked, indicating Ginger's magnetic cuffs.

There was a long moment where Alex Mitchell's doppelganger was sure that Ginger would say something to get the guard to remove them, but Ginger surprised them with her answer.

"Molecular stabilizers," she lied. "Fancy was of saying basically useless accessories. They're really symbolic more than anything. Remind me of my sins."

"Right," the guard said. "Into the chamber."

Ginger was shoved in after the others and the door was closed roughly behind them.

"Brace yourselves," Alex said as she took a seat on the floor. "This is gonna be nasty. But you'll get used to it."

"What-" the Doctor began.

The lights in the chamber brightened as the heat rose significantly. It became suddenly difficult to breathe and everyone felt compelled to sit.

"Thermosterilization," the Doctor gasped through gritted teeth. "That's-"

"Sterilization with heat," Rose shouted. "Think I got that one, thanks."

He groaned. "I've been through this process before," he said. "But it never hurt quite this much."

"It doesn't seem to be hurting you as much as the humans though," Ginger observed. 

And she was right. The others had all shed their coats and jackets in an effort to keep cool, but the Doctor had merely loosened his tie and unbuttoned his shirt.

"And you only look mildly inconvenienced," he observed.

"I grew up in the American South," Ginger said. "This dry heat is a little new to me, but I'll live."

"No it's more than that," the Doctor said. "You're adjusting quite as well as a Timelord should. I've gone through a Metacrisis, so I'm feeling the effects - well - maybe not as acutely as a human would, but I'm still finding them unpleasant."

"How long will this last?" Rose asked.

"A while," Alex said through gritted teeth. "They do this any time you set foot on their ship. They don't have viruses on their planet because the heat kills them off. So when they're out in space and catch something from one of us, they don't have an immune response. That's why they wear the full suits. So they can decontaminate quickly. But we have to go through this every time. They gradually raise the heat to kill off anything that may be living in us. There's also chemicals in the air we breathe to help purify us."

"Great," Ginger said. "Just great. As long as it doesn't turn into a Black Eyed Peas song in here." There was a small pause. "Sorry, I just realized I don't actually know who sings that song. I jumped to the first likely person I could think of."

"What song?" the Doctor asked.

"You know...the one that's like...it's getting hot in here...so take off all your clothes..."

"Nelly," Rose said. "That's Nelly."

"Oh. Right. I've heard that name. Not really my jam. Very memeable though."

"Why didn't you try to get them to take off your cuffs?" Alex demanded.

"What?"

"You had a chance to escape and you didn't take it."

"I had a what?"

"Just answer the question."

Ginger closed her eyes and leaned back against the wall. "I'm sure you've been listening in to everything I've said since you arrived, so you know how I feel about this whole situation. I'll take my punishment. That was the whole point of me being here. I'll take one for the Doctor so he can stop being hunted. I've got no problem with that. It's how it should be."

"What do you expect to be able to do?" Alex asked. "If they start asking any questions, you'll be exposed."

"I'm a bloody great actress," she insisted. "I can bluff my way through."

"There may be a challenge," Alex said. "They won't tell me what exactly they want the Doctor for, but they always talk about him 'fixing' something. They always say he'll fix it before they execute him."

"Which is why I should do it," the Doctor said. "Just come clean now."

"They'll scan you," Alex pointed out. "They'll see the one heart."

"Then I'll explain the Metacrisis-"

Ginger finally opened her eyes. "Okay, then what? They execute you preemptively and go back to hunting this universe's Doctor? I'm not letting that happen. I can do this."

"Do what?" he asked furiously. "Get yourself executed?"

"If I must," she said.

"Gingers have a death wish," Alex muttered. "Almost rivals yours, Doctor."

Ginger didn't like the way he was looking at her, so she looked away.

"You'd better hope it's not some medical test," Alex said. "We all know you're only up on basic first aid and random trivia. At least if the thing's mechanical, you might stand a chance."

"Why's that?" Ginger asked.

"Because you're an engineer. A brilliant inventor too, actually."

Ginger shook her head. "No I'm not. I can do like basic computer work, but once it's a hardware issue I'm kinda screwed. I don't even know how to drive a car."

"Oh," Alex said. "Well you're useless then. Noted."

Ginger chose not to rise to anger. "Not totally useless, just mostly. But I may know a way we can get around the issue of me not knowing things."

"What's that?"

She glanced at the Doctor. "We use our psychic connection."

Alex narrowed her eyes. "No. Absolutely not. Under no circumstances will you be allowed to-"

"Of course," the Doctor said. "Timelords have an inherent psychic bond with each other. If I can just reach out..."

"It may not be that easy," Ginger said. "We've tried remote links before, but I have some sort of defense mechanism. Like a firewall, keeping everyone out. Cupid's a bit cagey when I ask him about it, but I'm thinking it has something to do with why it's impossible to even do a brain scan on without my permission. And besides, even if it were possible to get through my firewall, do you think you'd be able to reach out? I mean you're part human now. We can test your psychic frequencies, but my guess is that they won't work as strongly."

The Doctor couldn't immediately formulate a response. There was a lot to unpack there. "So what do you suggest instead?"

"You and me, we've got a connection," Ginger explained. "I know you've always had more luck with psychic connections with humans when you're touching, so maybe that, plus the connection we have, will make us able to communicate secretly? We'd just have to find a way for you to be touching me while you send me the answers."

Rose looked up. "She has to be touching you?"

"Sorry, it's the only way I know it works. The Doctor and I used to call it Dreamfasting."

"Like in the Dark Crystal?"

"Yeah. It doesn't have to be anything big. One time the Doctor was able to communicate what he was thinking by brushing his fingertips across my thigh..." She realized where that train of thought was leading and cleared her throat. "But obviously it shouldn't be that. I wouldn't even be suggesting this if there were any other way."

"This is a blatant manipulation tactic," Alex insisted. "Get him close so you can put the whammy on him."

"Please explain to me the scientific nature of the whammy," Ginger quipped dryly.

The corners of the Doctor's mouth twitched. "X-Files reference, Agent Scully?"

She was both amused and nostalgic as she answered. "Yeah. It was one of the things we bonded over when we first met. You know, we inspired the X-Files?"

"Who did?"

"Me and you. I mean, me and _other_ you. We were in Roswell-"

"Roswell!" the Doctor said. "Love Roswell. It's always a good time."

"Chris Carter was there looking for inspiration. We were cosplaying as Mulder and Scully for a case and, well...Guess we created a stable loop."

The Doctor could tell that this fond memory meant a lot to her for reasons that weighed heavily on her heart. "So I just have to touch you?"

"Only long enough to transmit the thought or image," Ginger said. "And it can't be through fabric. Maybe just like brush my hand or something?"

"This is a terrible idea," Alex said.

"Why don't you trust me?" Ginger asked. "Honestly, Alex, you know I'm not who you think I am-"

"You're a Ginger," she muttered dismissively.

"But I'm different," she insisted. "I am! Not by much, but at least I try! I'm _trying_ to help!"

"Which is one of the most dangerous things a Ginger can do."

"Alright, I'll give you that one. But still. I'm not a threat, I don't have an agenda. I'm only trying to help. I know you can feel that."

"What do you mean I can _feel_ it?" Alex asked. "All I feel for you is suspicion. Maybe a bit of contempt."

"I don't mean what you feel _for_ me, I mean what you feel _from_ me. Your empath thing, Alex. You can feel what I'm feeling. I know you have trouble trusting what you get off people, but you can trust this-"

"Wait wait, what the hell are you talking about?" Alex asked. "What empath thing?"

Ginger blinked. "You know. You're an empath, Alex. You have been since you were a small child."

Alex shook her head slowly. "No, I'm not."

"Yes you are," Ginger insisted. "After your parents died-"

Alex rose to anger at once. "Don't you _talk_ about my parents!"

Ginger was perplexed but decided to press on. "Jack raised you for a while at Torchwood in Cardiff. The Rift Energy and the remnants of the Red Key mingled with your young autistic brain and gave you empathic abilities."

"Alright, first of all, I was raised by Torchwood in London. Second of all, who the fuck is Jack?"

This felt almost like a slap in the face. "Jack. Jack Harkness. Your uncle."

She shook her head. "I don't have an uncle."

"Well not by birth. He was your godfather."

"Don't have one of those either."

"No you do..." Then it hit her. "Oh maybe you don't. Not here. That would explain why you're so different. I guess I don't really know you here, Alex Mitchell. But I'm friends with your doppelganger back home. We're actually flatmates."

Alex scoffed. "Like I'd ever be stupid enough to room with you."

"It was a good arrangement for both of us," Ginger insisted. "After I left the Doctor, I needed somewhere to land. Your doppelganger needed someone around too. We both thought the Doctor might not come back. There was that whole prophesy thing that sounded pretty final...Alex, the Doctor is your adopted father on the other side."

"No," Alex said. 

"Yeah, he is-"

"No, you don't just get to talk to me about my family after what you did," Alex said. "You sit there wearing that same green coat that you were wearing the night you killed my parents and you wanna talk like you're someone different?"

Ginger's blood ran cold. "When I what?"

"You slaughtered my parents in front of me. If not you directly, then another you. I was small, but your face is seared into my memory. I've seen the security tapes a million times. You looked up at the camera and just waved like you were amused."

"I'm sorry, but that wasn't me," Ginger said. "I'd never do that."

"It's in your nature. I mean maybe you're not that one, but you're still enough like her that you have a green leather trench coat exactly like the one she's famous for. Same taste in men, same taste in fashion, same taste in everything, I'd imagine."

"I found this at the Outpost," Ginger said. "Oh god..." She started to shrug it off. "Actually, I know this is really weird and horrible, considering what I now know about it, but can I keep it? It's really really pretty."

"See," Alex said. "Just the same. Do you even know which one you are?"

"The last," Ginger said gravely. "Cupid said everyone else was just a test run."

Alex nodded. "That's almost worse. Everything your kind have ever put us through and it's all just to see the proper way to push you. Losing my parents and my fiancé to your murderous doppelganger was all to test a theory. For you. Isn't that fucking amazing?"

"I'm sorry," Ginger said. "I didn't realize...You were going to be married?"

"Her name was Kira," Alex said. "I watched you kill her. And there was nothing I could do about it."

"Kira," Ginger said. Then it dawned on her. "Not Kira Sakamoto?"

"Don't you dare say her name-"

"No it's just...Wow. You two never broke up in this universe?"

"Broke up?" This piece of information seemed to startle her. "Are we broken up where you come from? Would I just have lost her anyway?"

"Now I don't know about all that," Ginger said. "But yeah, you two broke up while you were still in secondary school."

Alex squinted with confusion. "We didn't know each other when I was in secondary school. We met working for Torchwood."

"Huh," Ginger said. "Weird. Torchwood doesn't technically exist anymore where I'm from, but Kira works for a Japanese team of alien hunters. So next best thing. You two are still good friends in my universe."

Her lips trembled slightly. "She's still alive where you're from?"

Ginger nodded and Alex looked away quickly. Ginger couldn't tell if the look on her face meant that she was happy or sad. Probably both.

"Is anyone going to explain what you're talking about?" the Doctor asked.

"It's a long story," Ginger said. "I'll tell you what I can if we make it out of this."

Alex scoffed. "That's bloody likely," she muttered under her breath.

Ginger ignored this. "I'll need to be touching you to establish the psychic connection. Nothing kinky, just skin-to-skin." She could see the doubt in his eyes. "I'm trying to show you that you can trust me. Will you give me that chance?"

He could see in her eyes that she felt wounded by his distrust, though wasn't surprised by it. He could also tell that she was trying hard not to let him see that. He nodded. 

She felt a palpable relief that he was even willing to give her a chance. "Alright," she said. "Roll up your sleeve a bit."

"Can't you just touch my hand?"

She glanced at Rose out of the corner of her eye. "No, I really can't. And I don't want to touch your face or neck either. Don't want anyone to think I'm going for the throat."

"Fair enough," he nodded. He pulled up his sleeve slightly.

Ginger still didn't move. "You sure about this?"

"Let's just say I Want To Believe," he said.

A slow smile spread across her face. She tentatively places her fingertips on his wrist.

_Images and sounds passed instantly into his mind._

_"The doctor released me_

_a case of underjoyed-"_

_He could see Ginger in his mind, but she looked different. Her hair was shorter and stuck out at odd angles beneath her black headphones. She was wearing a green and black striped shirt with an alien face on it, a black velvet mesh star skirt, black boots, and a leather jacket._

_Her black painted lips formed the words: "Not currently taking any transmissions from Earth, but you can submit a communications request and we'll get back to you in approximately 3 to 5 billion years. Nobody up here but Earth's most unwanted."_

_The song kept going._

_"_ _No mental condition_

_maybe I'm paranoid-"_

_Ginger carried on._ _"John Smith. It's an obvious fake name," She deduced._

_"I'm sorry, I forgot to ask yours?" he retorted._

_"Rude of you to ask for that which you won't give freely yourself."_

_"Fair point."_

_"So is it 'John Smith' because you're trying to be boring or John Smith because you want everyone to know you're a liar like the guy who wrote the book the movie Pocahontas was based off?"_

_"You talk like you were there."_

_"I talk like I can read and watch documentaries. And what's the deal with the blank sheet of paper you were waving around? Everyone else seems to be buying into it, and you don't even seem to be selling."_

_"Psychic paper. Funny that it didn't work on you."_

_"Yeah, well, I'm much cleverer than these mere humans."_

_The scene changed._ _The song kept going._

_"_ _Or maybe_

_maybe I'm just bored-"_

_“Well come on then!” she shouted, racing off at once. “Allons-y!”_

_He was momentarily stunned, but ran after her once he regained his composure. “Hey! That’s my line!”_

_“What?” she shouted back._

_“Allons-y! I always say that! It’s my thing!”_

_“You can’t claim a French phrase as your thing!” she protested. “You know, that is such a colonizer attitude to have! You English are all the same!”_

_“I’m not…” he argued, feebly. “I’m not English…Just have the accent…”_

_The song changed._

_"Gravity has_

_Changed her fucking mind_

_I'm a lost hotel_

_In space and time_

_So book me in_

_For your last show_

_Its inconsequential_

_Nowhere to go..."_

_"What's the Trickster's plan?" he insisted. "How do you figure in?"_

_A blonde woman who was clearly possessed by a Grackenvite laughed hoarsely. "You don't get it, you never do. The plan was always infiltration. Get someone close to you, and you'll protect them at great cost."_

_The song and scene changed again._

_"Love will be the death of me_

_Love is so fickle_

_It starts with a flood_

_And it ends with a trickle..."_

_"Why do I get the feeling that you use stories as a substitute for genuine human interaction?" he asked._

_"Stories are better than human interaction," Ginger replied. "They're simple. There is a structure. Life is a bit more chaotic and people don't say what they mean."_

_"People don't always say what they mean in stories either."_

_"Hey now, I'm just letting you crash here because you're in no fit state to be walking around. I can turn you out in a heartbeat if you start being sappy. I like story structure, yeah, but I'm not about to let myself get pulled along by some narrative. We're not friends or...anything else just because we faced the twelve foot mountain troll, alright?"_

_"You're defensive," he said, amused._

_"I just see the way an audience would interpret this, is all. And I refuse to play that game. This isn't shippable. We're not being tricked into anything by heightened emotions from circumstances. We're strangers, and you're gonna leave tomorrow and we'll never see each other again. That's the deal."_

_The song and scene changed again._

_"I bit my tongue and stood in line_

_With not much to believe in_

_I bought into what I was sold_

_And ended up with nothing_

_This is not my idea of of a good time..."_

_"You know, I picked up a copy of your playbill," he said, pulling it out of his pocket. "The lighting and sound tech isn't even listed on it. So I've got a serious question for you...Are you...a ghost? Did you die in the 90s and just get stuck here?"_

_She knew he was teasing and decided to give it right back to him. She turned her whole body towards him, tucking her legs underneath her as she laughed in disbelief. "Oh my god. You figured it out! Now I am free of this mortal coil and can go into the light!" She pulled a clicker out of her pocket and pressed a button, and suddenly a spotlight was shining directly on them. "No but seriously, you have no idea how funny it is that you said that."_

_He shook his head, grinning from ear to ear. "So what is it really then?"_

_She shrugged. "I requested to be left off the playbill. For...personal reasons."_

_"I still want something to call you," the Doctor said. "It doesn't have to be your real name, just make up something and I'll go along with it."_

_"What did you have in mind?"_

_"How about...Lorina Dodson? Or is that too obscure?"_

_"How dare you accuse me of not knowing my favorite Spiderman villain!"_

_He was amused and impressed at how she immediately understood that reference. "So not that then? How about…" he began, looking her over. "Scarlet?"_

_She laughed. "Why Scarlet?"_

_"It's the hair again, sorry," he admitted. "It's rather a striking feature."_

_"No I don't think I'm a Scarlet," she replied with some amusement. "I mean, I always play Miss Scarlet when I play Clue, but...I always identified a bit more with Mrs White in the movie."_

_"You did?" he asked, amused._

_"I always identify with Madeline Kahn. But maybe you're on to something." She pointed to the t-shirt she was wearing. "You know what this is?"_

_He peered at the black shirt with the big 'G' on it. "That's a Garbage concert shirt, isn't it?" he asked, wondering where she was going with this. "Not Your Kind of People tour, right?"_

_"Right," she replied, evidently satisfied with his answer. "Only concert I've ever been to. Greatest night of my life. Caught them at Troxy just after...Well, let's just say they gave me back my will to live even if just for a moment. I'd just moved to London not even a year earlier and after that I stopped just scraping by in that expensive motel I was staying in and got the job here. You know they're releasing a 20th anniversary version of their debut this year? Got it pre-ordered. Gonna go see them in Manchester when they get here in a few months."_

_"So...We're calling you Shirley then?" he answered, tentatively._

_"No, I can't carve an identity by trying to become someone else's," she said, rolling her eyes. "But what about Ginger? That should fill your need to call me based on my hair color and the shirt could be 'G' for Garbage as well as 'G' for Ginger. Oh and also...think of the puns!"_

_"You're not really ginger, though, are you?" he started. "I mean, your hair isn't orange and you don't have freckles."_

_"Irrelevant to the point," she dismissed this all with a wave of her hand. "So what do you think, Doctor? Am I Ginger?"_

_He paused, looking her over. "Alright, then," he said, with a grin. "You're Ginger." A slow grin spread over his face. "You know, I always wanted to be ginger."_

_"It's all so very spy-fi," Ginger said, satisfied. "These code names."_

_"Alright, so I have to admit something else to you, now that we've got that settled," the Doctor began, moving on. "That thing you said last night, about being a time traveler...Well, I actually am one. I'm a time traveling alien. I have my own ship and everything. If you really want to get away for a bit, see alien planets or times past, then you could come with me! Have an adventure! You don't have to be trapped on this boring planet anymore. Because this isn't all there is. There is so much out there to discover. What do you say, Ginger?"_

_She was sorely tempted, she had to admit. "If this is some kind of weird trick to get me to come back to yours, I've got to say that it's the lamest pickup line I've ever heard."_

_"It's a purely platonic offer, I assure you," he grinned. "Come on, I know this can't be your idea of a good time. So what of it, then? Do you wanna be a real time traveler?"_

_She hesitated, thinking it over. "No. Sorry, I've only just barely met you and I'm...I'm not there yet. Not ready to just pack it all up and go backpacking across space-time with a relative stranger. Can't believe I'm saying this but...think I might need to keep my feet on the ground."_

_The scene and song changed one more time in a flash, like there was no warning._

_"Oh yeah oh yeah you could tell me  
Man didn’t walk on the moon and I’d believe you  
Oh yeah oh yeah I don’t care  
Cause I just wanna get with you soon."_

_The lights were dim and green. They were in a hotel room that was decorated in tacky alien apparel. Her hair was longer than it was in the previous memory, but shorter than it was now. She was on top of him under the covers, moving over him as though in a dream._

_He laughed. “Must be what it’s like to reside in the secret parts of Fortune.”_

_She moaned. “God, talk more Hamlet to me. That helps. Just don’t try talking about ‘nothing’, because I studied Shakespeare and I know what that means.”_

_“You get off on the nerdiest stuff,” he said breathlessly._

_“You’re one to talk,” she said back. “I am the nerdiest stuff.”_

Ginger sprang away from him as though she'd been burned and looked away quickly. The Doctor could see the color rise quickly to her cheeks. Her eyes were filled with mortification and heartbreak.

"Sorry," she said. "I didn't mean for you to see that. It's the connection, it just sort of goes random-"

He was staring at her, feeling a dawning comprehension as well as complete bewilderment. So many questions answered that left so many more in their wake. "You can't control where your mind goes," he said. "I understand."

"I was trying to show you the first time we met," she said. "My mind skipped ahead. Just a bit."

"Right," he said.

She cleared her throat. "I'm hoping you can just forget what you saw so we can work the problem?" She could feel Rose staring at her.

"You'll have to keep more in control of your mind if we're going to work together," he cautioned.

"Won't happen again," she promised. 

"What is it?" Rose demanded. "What did she show you?"

"Nothing," the Doctor lied. Then his eyes widened. "I didn't mean nothing like... _Shakespearean_ nothing...I wasn't trying to be funny-"

"No, no, I got that," Ginger said hurriedly. "But you're making it worse by calling attention to it, just so you know."

"And here we go again," Alex said under her breath. "Hey Agent Tyler, did you ever think you'd get your Doctor back just to lose him to a Ginger? Because that doesn't sound like happily ever after to me."

"I'm not after him," Ginger insisted. "I'm not, I swear." She implored Rose to understand. "He's yours. I promise. I'm trying to find a way to save you both so you can have that life you want."

"I trust her," the Doctor said. "And anyway, I don't think we have any choice."

Rose considered this for a moment. She was liking it less and less. "Alright," she said. "But let's say this plan of yours works? How are we gonna convince them to let the two of you be touching during the whole thing?"

"We'll work that out," Ginger said. "Somehow."


	27. The Fear Song

Alex, Nova, and Thea reappeared in Sarah Jane's attic.

"Mr. Smith," Thea said. "In the interest of saving time, I will immediately report that, yes, the others were left behind on the alien spacecraft in order to secure our own passage so that we may attempt to solve this mystery from the ground."

"Your brevity in this matter is appreciated, Miss Thea," said Mr. Smith. 

"We're heading to the TARDIS now to see if we can't get to this planet of theirs and backtrack," Alex said. "We've been assuming up til now that this princess is on Earth, but if there's one thing I know it's that you can't always trust what you're told."

"I shall keep in touch with Thea throughout this process," Mr. Smith said.

"I look forward to your insights," Thea replied.

...

Armed guards escorted the Doctor, Jack, and Sarah Jane to an infirmary on the other side of the ship.

"What experience have you with Nerideen physiology?" asked Karvillian.

"No practical experience," the Doctor admitted. "I know enough to know about the venom sacs in the abdomen and the fact that your heart and brain are essentially the exact same organ, but I've never operated on your kind."

"Even just some theoretical idea of what to do could prove helpful," Karvillian said.

He parted a curtain to reveal a small cot. Upon it lay a Neridian female, but something seemed to be wrong with her. Her skin hadn't retained its yellow glow - it was literally ashen and crumbling off, revealing patches of bone. Her eye cavities were sunken and her breathing appeared labored.

"She's close to death, I'm afraid," said the Doctor. "At her age, there isn't much to do but make her comfortable."

"What age would you place her at, Doctor?" Karvillian inquired.

"One-twenty?" he guessed. "Maybe a hundred and twenty-five?"

"She's forty-eight."

"No..." the Doctor breathed. 

"What's the problem?" Sarah Jane asked.

"She's Neridian," said Jack. "They can live to be two hundred."

"This one's hit old age when she shouldn't even have hit her midlife crisis," the Doctor said. "It would be fascinating if it wasn't so concerning. What happened to her?"

"She was with Hahmidecta at the time of the kidnapping," Karvillian explained. "No one can explain how she came to be in such a state. She was only missing for four hours."

"Four hours?" the Doctor repeated. "This woman hit old age in four hours?"

"It appears so. We haven't been able to get any information from her. She's been in this coma the entire time. I've had my best experts on the case and none of them can explain the damage or find a way to reverse it."

"I'll do everything I can," the Doctor said. "Hopefully my daughter will be able to put together a timeline of events for you while we sort this out."

"Who is she?" Sarah Jane asked. "Was she targeted just by proximity to Hahmidecta or is there some other reason she'd be attacked?"

"Sorry, I suppose I didn't remember to introduce you," Karvillian said. "This is Hahmidecta's mother, Queen Rina. This is a politically motivated attack, but vengeance will be a personal one."

"I understand," Jack said. "We'll do everything we can to find out why this is happening to you."

The Doctor scanned Queen Rina with the sonic screwdriver. 

"Anything?" Sarah Jane asked. 

"Not as of yet," he said. "But I'll continue looking."

...

Alex threw the final lever as the TARDIS finished materializing on Planet Hecta. 

"Wait," Nova said. "If we're looking for Neridians, shouldn't we be going to a Planet Neridian or something?"

"Common misconception," Alex said absently. "Fed to you by scifi, most likely. Whole planets are almost never named after just one species."

"The Neridians are one species of Hectarian," Thea explained helpfully. "Their kingdom spans from the vast Nerideen desert to the mountains of Jevrilah. They are bordered also by the Magrideen sea and the Forest of Bewilderment."

"Forest of Bewilderment," Nova said. "Sounds like my kinda place."

"So what's the plan?" Alex asked. "Infiltration? Spy work?"

"I thought we should just warn them of the upcoming attack," Thea said.

"Oh that'll be a laugh," Alex said. "Oi, Mr. King Man, your daughter's about to be kidnapped and we're totally not the kidnappers also we don't know who's gonna do it."

"It's a point," Nova said. "They'll think we're mad at best if they don't think we're scheming somehow."

Alex began keying in different coordinates. "So let's change course. Let's backtrack. If we can't prevent it by warning them, let's prevent it by saving it from happening in the first place."

Thea put her hand on the lever that Alex was about to flip and looked at her sternly. "You can't just change established events that you're in the middle of. You know what your father would say."

Alex thought about arguing but finally sighed. "Yeah, suppose so. Doesn't mean we can't go back and take a look for ourselves, then point the good guys in the right direction."

"Just so long as we're clear," Thea said. "The plan is to go back, observe, then report. It's _not_ to be a hero."

"Cross my heart," she said. 

"No interfering?"

"No interfering. Honestly, Thea, it's like you think I'm new to this. Now can I get on with this?"

"Alright," Thea said. "Now that we're on the same page."

...

"The tissue damage is extensive," the Doctor said. "I don't understand it. It's as if she physically aged, but I can't find any evidence of a chemical accelerant."

"But this can't be natural," Sarah Jane said. "Her skin literally looks like ashes. It just crumbles off."

"That's just a biproduct of living until her age," the Doctor said. "Think of it as an extreme version of wrinkles. The collagen fades and your skin stops being elastic. Difference is with them, if you live past a hundred and eighty, your skin typically starts to crumble off. There are treatments, but they do nothing more than delay the inevitable."

"Is there anything you can do?" Karvillian asked.

"About the damage?" the Doctor asked. "I'll keep trying to find a way, but I'm not going to lie and say there's a good likelihood of being able to return her to the way she was. But what I can do is find a way to wake her up. We should know what she saw out there. Her eyewitness account could tell us what I'm missing."

...

The TARDIS materialized.

"First an alien spaceship, now a planet?" Nova asked.

"You ready?" Alex asked.

"Born ready."

They left the TARDIS to find that they'd materialized within a small orchard. There were purple wispy trees bearing a glimmering red fruit.

"A Hectafruit orchard," Thea said. "The fruit is meant to be quite similar to plums. But don't touch them. They're toxic to humans."

"Good to know," Alex said. 

Nova was more distracted by the gleaming bronze palace that was before them. "Hold on," she said. "What's this castle made out of? Looks sorta like solar panels."

"Very similar to solar panels," Thea said. "The idea was to draw energy from the sun wherever possible."

"They've sure got a lot of sunlight," Alex observed. The planet was flanked by double suns.

"Let's get to work," Nova said. "Where's this kidnapping supposed to take place?"

Alex consulted the note that the Doctor had slipped her. It was easy to read with the TARDIS translation circuits active. "In the back of the orchard, near the salt fountain."

"Then that's where we go," Thea said. "But keep low. Stay out of sight. Remember we're only here to observe."

...

"What's the delay?" Karvillian demanded. "You said you'd be able to wake her."

"I said I might be able to," the Doctor replied patiently. "And even that is a risk. If we do this too fast, she could damage herself further when she wakes up..." He could see movement behind her heavy eyelids.

"Can I ask the obvious question?" Sarah Jane said. "If she was only missing a few hours, how can you be sure this is your wife?"

"She has her marriage mark," Karvillian said.

"Nerideens get unique tattoos during the marriage ritual," Jack said. "Only the pair themselves know what their specific mark looks like."

"Everyone, quiet," the Doctor said in a low voice. He was sure Queen Rina was close to waking. "Queen Rina?"

...

"Guys, I think I found it," Nova whispered. 

She waved Alex and Thea over toward a yellow-orange structure that was shaped like a fountain, but contained no water.

"Good work, Nova," said Thea.

"Guys, someone's coming," Alex said.

They crouched behind a bush as a slender figure approached the fountain wearing an orange cloak. This figured knelt before the fountain as if to pray.

"That has to be her," Alex said. "The note said she was kidnapped during her nightly prayer. This must be it."

Thea could sense Alex's heartrate increase. "Alex," she cautioned. "We're only here to observe. Say it with me. Only here to observe."

"Yeah," Alex agreed. "You're right."

"We're doing as the Doctor would do," Thea said.

"Actually we're not," Alex said. "We're doing as the Doctor would _say,_ not what he'd actually _do._ I've known the guy for almost ten years at this point and he'll always witter on about timelines and rules and whatnot, but he'll always jump in and try to do the right thing. If there's even a chance of doing the right thing that won't totally break the universe, he'll do it. The past can be rewritten. And in this case, it should be."

Before Thea could stop her, Alex got to her feet.

"Excuse me, miss?" Alex said. She couldn't bring herself to genuflect or say 'your majesty' or anything stupid like that. "You wouldn't happen to be the princess, wouldja?"

The cloaked figure got gracefully to her feet and pulled down her hood to reveal a face that almost appeared to be chiseled out of bronze that was framed by soft rings of tawny hair.

"Who dares seek me at the War Shrine?" Princess Hahmidecta demanded.

"I don't know nothin' about any War Shrine," Alex said. "Look, lady, I came to warn you that your life is in danger."

The princess shook her head slowly. "No. You must be mistaken."

"There is a plot to kidnap you," Alex said. "I don't know by who, but I know it's supposed to happen soon. You're in danger."

Princess Hahmidecta appeared quite shaken by this information. "How do you know this?"

"Let's call it reliable intel," Alex said. "Is there somewhere safe we can get you? Away from prying eyes?"

"Yes, of course," the princess replied. "I know of a secret tunnel around the side of the palace. Follow me."

Alex kept her eyes resolutely front as they began the walk back to the palace. "I dare you to say I made the wrong call," Alex muttered to Thea.

"We shall see," said Thea.

...

The Doctor tried not to hover too near to the ailing Queen. He was aware that touching or even breathing on her could cause further damage to her skin.

"Queen Rina, can you hear me?" the Doctor asked. "Don't try to move or open your eyes. I'm-"

Queen Rina's mouth opened, causing cracks to spread along her face. "The Doctor," she croaked. Each breath dislodged a coat of dust from her lungs. "You're here to help."

"Yes," the Doctor said. "Do you know me?"

"I was told..." She took a rattling breath. "...To expect you. On the final day."

...

Princess Hahmidecta took them to a small dark chamber inside the palace walls. She turned to face them and crossed her arms.

"Who are you?" she demanded. "And how do you come by this information?"

Alex thought it was best to tell as much of the truth as possible. "I'm Alex. These are my friends, Nova and Thea. We sort of intercepted a transmission, I guess you could say. We're here to help."

"Transmission?" Hahmidecta asked. "What transmission?"

"There was a letter," Nova explained. "We think it was a diversion for the real kidnappers. It said you'd be kidnapped and taken to Earth in front of the salt fountain."

"That's impossible," Hahmidecta breathed.

"I know it's hard to accept," Thea began.

"You don't understand," Hahmidecta said. "That's literally impossible."

"You have to believe us," Alex said. "You're in danger."

...

"Rina?" Karvillian said. "Rina, my love, it's me."

"Karvi?" Rina replied, with something like hope. "Is that really you?"

"It is, my love, it is-"

"I missed you," she said. "I missed you so much."

"I've been right here," he said.

"You still look so young," she said. "Exactly as you always did."

"What happened, Rina?"

"Life."

"I don't understand."

"I know. I was taken to another place. There was no way to get back until now."

"How long were you there?" Jack asked.

"A hundred and fifty years."

The Doctor nodded. "No poison was used to age you rapidly," he said. "You were removed from your own timestream. You aged naturally."

"Who took you?" Karvillian demanded. "Who would do such a thing?"

"The woman. She said things were happening and the only way to save our daughter was to be removed from events."

"Woman?" Sarah Jane asked. "What woman?"

"I never saw her face. All those years, and she wouldn't show it. She said that I was about to stumble onto something that I would be killed for seeing, in which case I wouldn't be able to help."

"So she couldn't just tell you what that was?" Jack asked. "She couldn't just send you somewhere else? She had to imprison you out of your time stream for almost 200 years?"

"She had her own plans in motion, never would say what they were. Sometimes I think she was being cruel on purpose." She coughed. "I don't have much time left. Our daughter. Where is she?"

"Kidnapped," Karvillian said. "Did you see what happened?"

"No. But that does not mean I don't know what happened. Things are not what they seem."

"I don't understand."

"Our daughter has always had ambitions that were larger than our planet. You yourself have admitted to being disturbed by them."

"Yes. But what-"

"Hahmidecta is not the innocent she would make herself seem. She's too clever to be a true victim, even in her own kidnapping."

"What are you saying?"

...

"I do believe you," Hahmidecta said. She pulled a laser gun out of her cloak and aimed it at them. "But you're the ones who are in danger."

...

But the Doctor thought he was beginning to understand. "Are you saying that Hahmidecta orchestrated her own kidnapping?"

Queen Rina locked eye with the Doctor. "She told me you'd be clever."

"But why would she do that?" the Doctor asked. "Queen Rina, please, tell me why would your daughter kidnap herself?"

...

"We're not a threat to you," Nova said. "Seriously, we're trying to help."

"By getting in the way of my plans?" Hahmidecta asked. "Who have you told about this?"

"No one," Nova said. "We haven't spoken to anyone but you since we arrived."

"Good," Hahmidecta replied. "Then no one will look for you after I kill you."

"That would be unwise," Thea said in a low voice. "I'm going to have to ask you to stop aiming a gun at my charges."

"I'm the bloody princess, mate," Hahmidecta said. "You have no authority to give me orders."

But Alex was thinking far beyond the immediate danger. "Wait, plans? What plans? Are you telling me you already knew about the kidnapping?"

"Of course I bloody knew," Hahmidecta said. "It's my plan, after all! And I'm not about to let some little humans get in the way of my conquest!"

...

The Doctor pushed his way back towards the primary flight deck with Jack and Sarah Jane in tow.

"Who do you think you are?" Karvillian shouted. "You can't just give orders on my ship!"

"I can and I will!" the Doctor shouted. "This isn't up for discussion! We're leaving orbit! Now!"

"And heading where?" Jack asked. "She could still be on Earth somewhere!"

"I don't think she is," the Doctor said. "She'd be in the next logical vantage point to watch the carnage."

"Where's that?" Karvillian asked.

"Think about it. Where would you go to get a front row seat to the destruction of the Earth?"

It dawned on Sarah Jane. "The Moon?"

One of the guards stopped the Doctor from entering the flight deck. "Your majesty, should we stop him?"

"You'd better not," Sarah Jane said. "His daughter kidnapped my daughter, and if the Doctor himself doesn't make you get out of the bloody way then I will."

The guard took one look at Sarah Jane and backed off. "Sorry, ma'am."

The Doctor seemed startled by Sarah Jane's proclamation. "What makes you think Hahmidecta kidnapped Alex?"

"She hasn't checked in yet," Sarah Jane said. "She would've checked in by now if she'd followed the plan. I've been ringing her and she hasn't picked up."

"She could just be busy," the Doctor said. "Stealth."

"Doctor," Sarah Jane said. "This is Alex. This is the little girl who rushed into a burning building hoping to change a fixed event. She's all grown up now, but she's still that same girl. She knew Hahmidecta was supposed to get kidnapped. Even with strict orders not to interfere, she was always going to."

"If it's true that Hahmidecta kidnapped herself, then there's no way that Alex trying to warn her would end well," Jack said. "Frankly, I've got to believe that she's gotten away. But the best case scenario would be her getting kidnapped. Because otherwise..."

The Doctor didn't want to think about that. "They're smart kids, they'll make it out. And they're with Thea! As soon as Thea has an advantage, she'll take it!"

...

Alex kept her hands raised. 

"Alright, sure," she said. "So you're, what...kidnapping yourself? Not that I'm knocking the plan, definitely not knocking it. It's a good solid plan, I'm sure. I'm just not sure I understand-"

"It's not _for_ you to understand, human," Hahmidecta replied.

"Yeah, yeah, I get that," Alex said. "Sort of. It's just if I could make a small suggestion? Maybe don't kill us?"

"No use trying to talk your way out of it. You'll only get in my way if left alive-"

"But I mean, it's actually _more_ of a hassle if you kill us," Alex pointed out. "Because if you kill us, there's gonna be blood and stuff. Probably an inquiry after that. And that'll all definitely throw off your time table. Especially since you won't be around long enough to try to put your plan into motion."

"And why's that?"

Alex nodded at Thea. "You see my associate there? She's an android. She's all shielded and stuff, so you can't actually hurt her with that thing. But if you kill us, she'll kill you. Simple. What I'm proposing is you kidnap us instead. Use us as leverage once the Doctor finds out what you're up to. Because he _will_ find out what you're up to."

Hahmidecta peered at her. "Who? Is that supposed to frighten me, that some physician could find out what I'm doing?"

Alex's cool façade flickered. "Oh. Well. You should be scared, but never mind then. Anyway, yeah. We'll make better hostages than corpses. Just something to consider."

Princess Hahmidecta considered this proposition. "She's an android?"

"Yeah," Alex said.

"So how'm I supposed to believe that she won't just kill me the minute my back's turned?"

"Because I'll tell her not to," Alex said. "She listens to me."

"It would be easier just to kill you," she sighed. "But my window is closing. So looks like I'll have to keep you." She gestured with her weapon. "But stay in front of me. No tricks."

...

Hahmidecta led them to her ship and allowed them to climb inside first. A platoon of Neridians awaited with their weapons drawn.

"Stay alert, everyone," Princess Hahmidecta said. "We've got hostages."

"That wasn't in the plan," said a bald Neridian who was wearing a tan sort of leather suit. 

"It is now, Trivlek," she replied. "We don't have time to debate. Radio the deck to get us in the air."

Trivlek nodded and moved to a radio on the wall. He began speaking into it softly.

A slender Neridian with blonde braids spoke up. "So what should we do with the hostages?"

"Keep them with me," Hahmidecta replied. "I want them in my sight at all times. No funny business." She proceeded to a small throne mounted against the wall and sat just as the ship took off. "Now. I have some questions. Who are you three? Who else knows about the plan? And which one of these idiots leaked it to you?"

"We're time travelers," Alex replied. "We're trying to prevent a war."

"War?" Hahmidecta mocked. "There won't be a war. I picked a low-level planet so there's no chance of real retaliation."

"I assure you," Alex said. "If you go after the Earth, the retaliation will be swift and without mercy." 

Alex could only hope that this proclamation sounded as impressive as it did in her head. It felt like bluffing coming from her. She just wanted to sound as dangerous as the Doctor or Jack or even Sarah Jane sounded when they said things of that nature. But she was just Alex. The threatening didn't exactly come naturally.

Nova had been taking in the room during all of this, scoping out the place for weaknesses. She took a step in the direction of the throne and all weapons aimed directly at her. She put her hands in the air.

"Hey, not trying anything funny," Nova said. "Just had a few questions. It's not really fair, you getting to ask us all these questions and us not getting to know anything about you."

Hahmidecta tilted her head and rested her chin upon her fist as she regarded Nova closely. "I am a war queen," she replied. "I am not beholden to human conceptions of fairness."

"War queen?" Nova replied. "I thought you were a princess. So which is it?"

"Future war queen, then," Hahmidecta replied. "My people share a noble lineage of conquest and triumph. We've been in a restful peace for eighty years. This makes the people grow complacent."

"Oh so I see," Nova said. "You gonna kill the Earth to stir up the natives? Cause a little drama?"

"The Earth is a starting place," Hahmidecta replied. "It needs to be razed. Once it is habitable for colonization, then we use it as an outpost for conquest."

"And you'll do to other planets what you intend to do to Earth?" Thea asked.

"Not to most of them," Hahmidecta said. "We'll require workers, after all. It's really only humans we need dead."

Alex crossed her arms. "Because you know we'll fight back?" 

"Because you're too soft for the kind of manual labor we require of you, and you don't taste terribly good."

"Oh." Alex this off quickly. "But there's still something that doesn't make sense. Why go to all the trouble of kidnapping yourself?"

...

"This is all my fault," Karvillian said. "The warning signs were all there, but I didn't heed them. Hahmidecta's been growing more unstable for some time, but I thought it was just a phase. Everyone goes through a rebellious phase in their 30s."

"This is more than just a phase," Sarah Jane said. "I've raised three children and none of them have ever kidnapped themselves and framed an entire planet for it."

"Which raises the question of what she gets out of it," Jack said. 

"She's obsessed with the war god legacy," Karvillian said.

"The what?" asked Sarah Jane.

"There's an old legend on Neridian," the Doctor said. "They have a sort of war god - similar to Ares. They prayed to the deity before battle and she blessed them."

"She's been dormant during our long peace," Karvillian explained. "My father created agreements with all of our major realms. We no longer seek to expand our territories. Hahmidecta recently got it into her head that this was a mistake. We fought constantly about it. She believed that we looked weak to our enemies. She thought that if we weren't expanding territory, others would think we were open for taking ourselves."

...

"It's all for the glory," Hahmidecta said. "Our goddess will be pleased when I've colonized Earth. I will be the queen that returns her favor to our people."

"You feel you've lost that favor?" Alex asked.

"I don't feel. I know."

"How?"

"She told me."

Nova scoffed. "Right, so you get, what, prophetic visions or something? Convenient cult leader excuse."

"She wasn't a vision," Hahmidecta insisted. "She was real! She appeared to me! She said we had to move on the Earth or lose all favor with her! For the great glory of the Neridian empire!"

"Wait wait, hold on," Alex said. "Someone actually _told_ you to move on the Earth? Like specifically?"

"Madraykin," Hahmidecta said. "Madraykin told me to move on the Earth."

But Alex had bigger fish to fry. "And she told you to move on Earth now? Like right now?"

Hahmidecta rolled her eyes. "Yes. Her instructions were very clear."

"Oh were they? What were they specifically?"

"To send a ransom note to my parents, framing the Earth for my disappearance." Hahmidecta rose from her throne and walked toward them. "Our custom dictates that any and all crimes against the royal family are met with swift justice without mercy. I was to keep myself out of the way until humanity is destroyed then step in to claim my birthright."

Hahmidecta stood directly in front of Alex, who just looked at her for a moment.

"Just one more question," Alex said. "Where were you when she appeared to you and gave you these orders?"

"At the fountain where you found me," Hahmidecta said. "Three months ago, on Ravlok's Day, at sundown."

"Right, okay, cool," Alex said, clapping her hands together. 

"Any other questions?" Hahmidecta asked.

"No," Alex said. "Think I'm good for now."

Hahmidecta looked satisfied with herself and walked off to confer with one of her hired guns. Alex waited until it seemed like nobody was looking at them.

"Wait til we get to wherever they're going," she muttered out of the corner of her mouth. "Then you grab us and teleport us back to the TARDIS."

Thea didn't respond, but Alex knew that she understood. 

...

When they finally teleported back to the TARDIS, Nova wasted no time.

"The moon?" she said. "They're on the _moon_?"

"For now," Alex said as they pushed their way back into the TARDIS. "God, I'm so stiff after sitting there for hours."

"We're lucky they didn't kill us," Nova said. "If we could teleport the whole time, why did we wait that long?"

"We needed to know the whole plan, including where they'd be," she said as she began setting coordinates. "If we disappeared before they got there, they could just go somewhere else and we'd be at square one."

"Okay, but why not just grab princess pea and bring her with us?" Nova asked. "We could end this whole thing."

"Because it's already part of our timeline," Alex said. "It'll be more effective just to point her father in the right direction."

"Is that what we're doing?" Thea asked.

She threw the final switch. "Not quite yet."

...

Nova opened the door just a crack. "We haven't moved at all," she whispered. "Are you sure you did this right?"

Alex fought a smile. "We moved, just not in space." 

She watched with barely disguised amusement as Nova figured it out.

"Oh, we moved in _time_?" the human asked.

"That's right," she said. "We can't interfere this time, I know better. But maybe we can get a look at this god. See if we can't snatch her instead."

"It's a risky plan," Thea said. "Your father-"

"Isn't here," Alex said. "And he'd do the same thing if he was here, so he shouldn't be lecturing me about risks. Are you gonna stop me?"

Thea looked at her in a way that Alex knew meant she was weighing all the options. "I will if I have to."

"Fair enough. Let's go."

...

They made their way back to the fountain and crouched in the bushes.

"This is the same bush we hid behind hours ago," Nova said.

"Technically it's the one we will hide in months from now," Alex said.

"Trippy," Nova said. "I'll never get used to that."

...

A hooded figure approached the fountain then knelt before it. Hahmidecta removed her hood and began praying.

Suddenly, a figure appeared behind the princess. This person was dressed in a shiny skin-tight green and black bodysuit with a matching mask with horns. Her long green hair was flipped over one shoulder. She approached Hahmidecta and placed a gloved finger under her chin, coaxing her to rise and face her.

"We should move," Nova said. "This is her. We just need to follow her..." She noticed that Alex was being oddly still. "Alex?"

Alex was staring at the newcomer with a look of pure terror.

Thea put a hand on Alex's shoulder. "Hey," she said. "Look at me. What's wrong?"

Alex didn't take her eyes off the lady in green. "We've got to leave. Now."

"We're not gonna stay?" Nova asked. "Follow the wannabe god back to base then snatch her?"

Alex didn't answer.

"Alex?" Nova said. "Hey, you alright? Talk to me."

The lady in green disappeared into thin air, leaving Hahmidecta behind.

"It's too late anyway," Alex said. "There's nothing we can do now."

...

Alex didn't speak as she set their course.

"Hey," Nova said. "What happened back there? Not judging or anything, just wondering."

"I choked," Alex said.

"The plan never would've worked," Thea said. "She didn't leave anywhere we could follow. She just disappeared. You can't blame yourself for being a spectator, which is what you were supposed to be in the first place."

Nova put her hand over Alex's, stopping her from throwing another switch. "Alex," she said. "Please. Just explain this to me."

"I can't," Alex said. "Not yet. I'm still working it out. It's just a distraction. We've got bigger fish."

Nova removed her hand to let Alex get back to it. "Sure. Like the fish in the oceans that are about to boil if we don't get back to that ship."

"Exactly," Alex said. 

"So we go back to London?" Thea said. "We should call to check in with your parents."

"We'll take a more direct route," Alex said. 


	28. Little Bird Heart

**Pete's World**

Bits and pieces of memories returned to Ginger like flashes.

_"Doctor...?" Rose had said. "I'm feeling sorta..."_

_Alex had groaned. "Great. Anesthesia."_

_"What?" Ginger had asked._

_"They're going to knock us unconscious before they move us," Alex had explained. "Safer that way. There are colorless, odorless gasses they use in the decontamination process anyway. Wouldn't be hard to add knock out gas to the mix."_

_Ginger had noticed how the two humans appeared to be having trouble keeping their eyes open. She frowned. "But I'm not feeling anything."_

_"I am," the Doctor said. "Just a little. Starting to feel a little..." He chuckled._

_"Doctor..." Rose said softly before her head fell forward slightly and she dropped off to sleep._

_"Everyone try to stay awake!" Alex had commanded. "Everyone...whatever you do...don't fall..."_

_"Well she's a goner," Ginger had said. She noticed the Doctor's eyelids sliding lower. "Hey. Hey, stay awake, you hear me?"_

_"I'm trying," he said. "You are...remarkably resilient."_

_She frowned. "How do you mean?"_

_"You didn't have nearly the expected pain reaction to the decontamination," he explained in a near whisper. "And now you're not even phased by the knock out gas..."_

_"Yeah, I've got a high tolerance," she said. "I'm the only person who can dose me successfully. They never get the quantity right. Unless it's magnetization. For some reason that knocks me out flat..." She frowned and shook him. "Hey, stay awake, please?" A note of desperation entered her voice. "Stay awake, please. Don't leave me here alone."_

_"I won't if I can help it," he said. "But if I can't...I have a feeling that you don't need me nearly as much as you think you do."_

_"What does that mean?"_

_"Do you love me?"_

_Her hearts seemed to crash in her chest. "What?"_

_A gentle smile crossed his lips. "The other me, I mean. You know what I saw."_

_She still felt a little embarrassed about that. "I can't see how that's relevant."_

_"It's very relevant," he said. "Because I know you love me. The other me. I can feel it. But it's holding you back. Clouding your judgment."_

_"What do you suggest I do about it?"_

_He laughed to himself. "I don't suggest anything. I've been accused before of being proof that emotions destroy me. It would be hypocritical of me to offer a solution to your problem when I can't fix mine. When I'm not even sure that I'd want to if I could." He took a breath. "You don't have to be a Cyberman to not let your emotions get the better of you. Logic isn't the absence of feeling, it is the wisdom to know how to use it. So stop convincing yourself that you've got no control over how you feel. Learn how to use it."_

_"This is a lot of advice you're giving to someone you only just met who's an accused murderer and manipulator," she pointed out._

_"I can't explain why I know I can trust you, only that I do," he replied. "But I'm not letting that feeling get the better of me. Just because I trust you doesn't mean I'm letting my guard down. If I see any reason to believe that you're endangering Rose in any way-"_

_She smiled and laughed._

_He squinted at her. "What?"_

_"You're just so intense about her. You always have been. It makes it sound ludicrous that AlterAlex believes that I could ever come between you."_

_"...AlterAlex?"_

_She grinned. "Good, isn't it? It's so I can keep them straight in my head...Well not straight, since they're gay...but you know what I mean. Alternate Alex - AlterAlex. Just like how in my universe I had DoppelGinger and DoppelDoc."_

_The Doctor laughed in earnest. "That's actually very clever."_

_"He always thought so too." She stretched a bit. "God, I think I'm beginning to feel it a bit too..." The Doctor didn't answer. "Doctor...? Doc...?"_

_She had vague memories of being partially awake when the guards returned to fetch them._

_The guard grabbed her arm. She shrugged the hand off of her and crawled closer to the Doctor. She shook his arm._

_"Doctor..." she whispered. "Doc...You've gotta wake up..."_

_The guard spoke words that she shouldn't be able to understand._

_"Viskarioom elde Maha."_

_She understood it instantly. The translation was:_

_"This one's still awake."_

_The other guard answered. "Progvarioom."_

_This translated as: "Impossible."_

_She opened her mouth and what came out was entirely on instinct._

_"Mirvashnik elde komdra."_

_The guards exchanged a look before the one closest to her replied: "Lorvana?"_

_She rolled her eyes. "Wysh."_

_The guards glanced at each other again before the one closest to her tried to snatch her again._

_"Nid," he said._

_She shook her head fervently and tried to resist, but was too sluggish in this drugged state. "Nid Irishnik."_

_She had a dim memory of protesting as she was half carried from the room. She tried to fight back, but passed out mid swing._

These memories all came back to Ginger the second before she opened her eyes. She gasped audibly and sat up sharply, her eyes instantly searching the room for threats. 

The first thing she noticed was that she seemed to be alone. She knew better than to trust this, so she made no sudden movements.

The second thing she noticed was that she appeared to be unbound, apart from the magnetic cuffs that were still attached to her. 

The third thing she noticed was that she seemed to be in a well furnished bedroom, lying on a very comfortable bed. Everything was furnished in shades of brown and red, and there were no windows. There was, however, a door directly in front of her.

She first checked underneath the bed to make sure she had no nasty surprises lurking under there before carefully lowering herself to the floor. The minute her feet his the ground, a holographic yellowish-orange orb sprang up before her.

Ginger scrambled back onto the bed and assumed a defensive position. "What the fuck?" she spat.

The orb spoke in a mechanized buzzing and seemed to pulsate with each syllable. "Identifying preferred language as...English," it said in an approximation of a cheery tone. "Apologies for startling you, Gallifreyan. I am the Homing Consciousness. I am responsible for overseeing your care while you're in our facility."

"Facility?" Ginger responded. She took a moment to get her bearings. "No humming or buzzing or rumbling - apart from you, I mean...So we're not on the ship anymore?"

"You were put into medically induced comas and transported off-ship to a Venutian holding facility," the Homing Consciousness replied helpfully. "Standard procedure."

"So I'm on Venus?" she asked. "...Cool." She shook this off. "Alright, but this doesn't look like a jail. I'm not tied down to anything and there are no guards."

"We believe in humane treatment of prisoners," the Homing Consciousness replied. "We get so few of them since all but the very worst offenders simply get put into rehabilitation outpatient programs, but we don't want even our violent offenders last moments to be spent in suffering. That would be inhumane."

Ginger was rather taken aback by this casual proclamation. "I suppose it would be? So what's the catch?"

The tiny orb bobbed slightly and whirred louder for a moment before answering. "Catch? Earth English dictionary defines this term several ways. Do you mean to intercept or capture or in the figurative colloquial sense of having a hidden drawback?"

"The last one." But another question occurred to her. "Wait, you said _Earth English._ Are there variants of English scattered throughout the universe? How many dialects are there? Are they similar to Earth English or would we need a translation?"

"Answering your questions in order...There is no 'catch'. There are twenty four distinct branches of the English language family, splitting themselves off into at least two hundred and fifty dialects. Some are easier to translate than others."

"Woah," Ginger breathed. She shook this off quickly. "Wait, sorry, got distracted. How can there be no catch? I'm awaiting execution and you tell me I'm allowed to have a comfy bed? Where's the gruel? The torture?"

"Those would be inhumane."

"Do I have internet access here?"

"Through me. You may think of me as a filter. I can procure any digital entertainment you wish while you wait."

"I can sort of live with that, I guess. Well, not for long, I suppose. But how can you say you're against inhumane treatment? Isn't execution in itself inhumane?"

"They are a last resort punishment for non Venutians. Only war criminals tend to receive the punishment of death, but even in that case it is seen as putting an individual out of its misery."

"All this philosophy is starting to hurt my head."

"Apologies. Would you like me to procure some medicine for your discomfort?"

"No, no, it was a figure of speech." There was a short pause. "So here's the real question, I guess. Am I allowed to leave this room?"

"Of course you are."

"Really? But when I leave this room, there will be all kinds of guards waiting, right?"

"Why would there be guards waiting?"

"To make sure I don't escape."

"There's no escape. You've reached the end of your suffering."

"Not ominous at all, thanks. You know, if you were an actual person with like a personality, I'd actually probably like you. But I can leave this room?"

"Yes. You have free range of your villa."

She blinked. "Villa?"

...

Ginger emerged from the room into what appeared to be a long hallway. She couldn't help but be reminded of the balcony-like hallways in Turner Manor as she looked over a small courtyard that was completely encircled in all sides by walls. There wasn't even a speck of greenery to be seen in this courtyard, but there was a small fountain resembling a serpent. Looking up, Ginger could see that this almost charmingly rustic feel was undercut by the appearance of a field of red energy that she could only figure would hurt like a bitch if she came near it in an attempt to escape. There seemed to be nothing but stone above her. She reasoned that she must be underground. But escape wasn't the thing on her mind. She had to find the others.

"Homing Consciousness?" she asked. She hoped that was the right form of address because it felt so awkward to say.

The tiny orb appeared. "Yes, Gallifreyan?"

"How many people currently occupy this place? Apart from me?"

The orb bobbed slightly and hummed louder before answering. "Apart from you, there are three other occupants."

She knew this had to be her friends. She tried to think of a way to find them without alerting the Consciousness to her plan. "Where can I get some food?"

...

The Homing Consciousness directed Ginger to a kitchen that was located on the ground floor of the estate. It was large and spacious and evidently well equipped. Ginger was briefly alarmed to see a large metal humanoid standing directly in the center of the kitchen before the Homing Consciousness flew into it. 

When the Homing Consciousness spoke again, it was with pulsating lights on each syllable that emanated from the stationary eye and mouth holes on the head of the robot.

"What can I prepare for you?" it asked.

Ginger just stared at it. "Uh..."

The Doctor rounded the corner at that moment and was relieved to see her. "Gi..." He remembered their ruse and course corrected. He cleared his throat. "Doctor, is that you?"

Ginger jumped, but also relaxed at the sight of him. "Thank Illyria, you're here!"

He laughed. "Illyria? Is that like a real phrase you used or do you mean that Buffy character?"

She couldn't help but smile fondly. "The Buffy character. I don't do gods."

"Standing by for orders," the Homing Consciousness said.

"Oh sorry," Ginger said. "Doc..." She cleared her throat as she realized the mistake she was about to make. _"Wes,_ this is..."

"The Homing Consciousness," the Doctor said. "We've been acquainted."

"Did it fill you in on the 411?" Ginger asked.

"Broadly speaking."

A question occurred to Ginger. "Hey, Homing Consciousness? Are all my friends here?"

"They were transported with you in order to give you comfort in your final moments."

"And what happens to them when I die?"

"They will be returned home."

"Alright. And are we being monitored here? Like are my final moments being recorded for like historical record or anything?"

"That would violate your right to privacy."

"Oh," she said. "Cool. Do you know how to make pancakes?"

...

Ginger waited for her food in a nearby room that she supposed must be the Venutian equivalent of a living room. She and the Doctor stood at opposite sides of the room.

"So do you buy it?" she asked.

"Buy what?" he asked.

"That we're not being monitored. It seems too good to be true."

He shrugged. "We just have to go with it, don't we?" He noticed the way her hands were fidgeting restlessly. "Feeling nervous?"

"What?" she snapped.

"Fidgeting," he pointed out. "Or should I say stimming?"

She couldn't help but smile to herself at that. "You told me once that you knew I was autistic from the first day we met. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you did it again."

"Should I say sorry?"

"No. It's fine. You were the one who helped me come to terms with that part of myself. I'm glad to get that part of the introduction out of the way."

"So listen..." He took one step toward her, but she took one wary step back. He stopped. "Sorry, was that...Too fast? I wasn't going to attack or anything, I just thought it might be easier to plan if we weren't standing so far apart."

She shifted her weight to one foot as she absently toed at the ground with the other. She kept her eyes on her fidgeting hands. "No it's not that, it's just...I don't think we should be seen too close together."

"Why not?"

"People might get the wrong impression."

"And what impression is that?"

"You know..." She gave a frustrated sigh. "You heard the way AlterAlex was talking about me. I don't want anyone coming in and thinking I've been trying to move on you. For Rose's sake, I think it's best if we keep things at a distance so as not to be suspicious."

"You don't think the way you're acting is at all suspicious? Being very deliberately awkward around me and keeping a distance doesn't do anything but make it seem like you're guilty of something."

"Fuck, you're right." She sat down heavily. "Sorry, I just...Nothing's gonna happen with you and me. And I can hear myself saying that I know it's part of my pattern with the other you. I always say that and then something does. But I mean it here."

"You didn't mean it with him?"

"I meant it, I just..."

He nodded. "I'm not him. You see me as half the man he was."

"No!" she said hurriedly. "No, that's not it at all. I know you're him. A different him, but still him. I've just been through a lot lately. Seeing you is opening wounds that I thought were finally healing, but I can get past that. Because I feel clear headed. I never felt clear headed around him. We were both so..." She took a deep breath. "It's not about you. If anything, I'm acting so weird because I know how this looks. I know the things that are being said about me, and I can't deny some of them. My purpose is to corrupt the Doctor. So it's best that you remain with Rose."

"Good, because I wasn't planning on leaving her." She looked up at him sharply, so he pressed on. "AlterAlex keeps talking about me like I can't make my own decisions or like you're just some irresistible temptress, but I have news for you both: I'm stronger than you think and you're not all that, missy."

The corner of her mouth twitched slightly and she bit back a laugh. "Is that right?"

"Yeah," he said. "For starters, you're sort of funny looking."

"Oi, so are you!" she protested. "I mean, look at your little sideburn things! And what's up with your little hair tuft thing?"

"Oh you like the little hair tuft thing," he said. "Look at you, you're into the sideburns!"

"I do not, you take that back!"

"Let's face it, little miss. You fancy me."

"I do _not_ fancy you!"

"You do fancy me, there's no use denying it! Well, you fancy this face, at least. Me, you're a little iffy about, but I've seen into your mind, Ginger Roswell, and you didn't look to me like you had any objections to the hair then."

She was caught between a laugh and a clever retort when the mirth died in her throat. 

He spotted the sudden sadness in her eyes. "What? Something I said?"

"No," she breathed. "Just...It was almost like old times except slightly to the left. Reminded me that you can't do that. People will think you're flirting with me."

"I'm not," he said truthfully. "It was just teasing."

"Yeah, and we're around humans," she said. "Humans have a concept of heterosexuality. The human conception of heterosexuality assumes flirtation to be the cause of teasing. Honestly, man, like read a manual. I'm just trying to look out for you and not cause any unnecessary drama."

"You don't think that purposely avoiding even looking at me would rouse the same amount of suspicion?"

"Fuck you're right," she said. "No matter how you slice it, we'll always look like we're hiding something." She sighed. "I wish AlterAlex had never planted ideas in your head about us. I was hoping to get out of here without you ever even having the thought."

"Don't worry so much about me, I'm not your responsibility."

She smiled to herself. "Yeah, one of these days maybe I'll believe that. Right around the time you stop feeling responsible for me."

"Who says I do?"

"Oh come on. Don't try to tell me that the second you saw two heartbeats you weren't seeing some glimmer of hope. I know you did, because he did too. But you've got to put that from your mind. I'm no one. I've never even been to Gallifrey. Hell, my genetic anomalies make me about as Gallifreyan as you are, at this point. So don't try to save me as some last hope for taking back the Time War. That's what they want you to do, so you can't do that."

"He told you what he..." He swallowed. "What _I_ did? In the Time War?"

She nodded. "Not everything, because I wouldn't let him. I regret that now. But I know enough. He wanted to tell me."

"Could you...show me?"

She hesitated.

"Please, I just...You didn't show me anything before that gives me reason to trust you. I felt like I could based on how I saw him react, but...Give me a real reason to trust you."

She knew all the reasons that this was a bad idea, but she hated knowing that he was doubting her. She nodded. He walked slowly toward her and extended a hand. She hesitated for a moment longer before placing her hand in his. 

_They were sitting on a rooftop in London. She was dressed in dark sunglasses and a dark suit. He was wearing a Wonka costume._

_"It's just a costume," he shrugged. "I only wore it to get a reaction from you."_

_"No, but it's Wonka!" she protested. "When you're a kid watching that movie, you focus on all the wonder of the world he's built. It seems fantastic and wonderful even as it's actively trying to kill you. But I realized upon watching it as I got older that this character, Wonka, he's...sort of sad. Lonely. Listen past the words in 'Pure Imagination'. He's singing about how this place is paradise, but as the song goes on he seems to be slightly depressed. Just an old man with no one in the world, wanting to show someone else the wonders of his world so he can see it through their eyes. Growing up really is a curse."_

_The Doctor was a bit shaken by this. "Maybe you're reading a bit much into this. But I think doing this whole Halloween thing with you has made me understand you a bit better.”_

_“How do you figure?” she asked._

_"The point of all this is that none of it is really you. The girl hiding behind the dark glasses.” He lifted a hand. “May I?” She hesitated, then nodded. He gently removed her sunglasses. He smiled. “That’s better. Now, as I was saying. You’re the actress who likes Dollhouse whose favorite holiday is Halloween. Because you don’t like yourself at all. You want to be someone else. Someone larger than life. Larger than your life. Because this one isn't good enough for you."_

_She shivered. "Well you've just got me figured out, haven't you?"_

_"But it's true?"_

_She hesitated. "Yeah, it is," she admitted. "I just never feel right in my own skin. Everything feels too small. I've been looking for a way off this rock for the longest time. I always fancied being abducted by aliens. It seemed like the logical answer to my problems. I read everything I could find about them when I was a kid. Then I got in with a Scottish alien hunting group and we used to go round checking out sightings, but I never got to see anything. So I sort of gave up on it. Just like I did everything else. There's no use wanting anything in this world, you won't be able to have it."_

_"That's a pretty bleak way of looking at things," he said. "But you've found aliens now. You've got me."_

_"Sure, for right now," she said, dismissively. "Then you'll just go hopping on back to your planet like nothing happened."_

_"I won't," he said. "For one thing, my planet really is gone. I can't go back even if I wanted to."_

_"What happened?" Ginger asked. "Global Warming?"_

_"There was a war," he said. "Everyone lost. Now there's just me. I do understand, though, about feeling suffocated on your home planet. I've told you before, I hated life where I was. I had trouble playing by their rules, so I ran away. Got off planet. I didn't wait for someone to take me away, I just jumped at the opportunity. You say you waited your whole life to be abducted by aliens, and yet every time you're asked you hesitate."_

_"I'm just not ready to take my feet off the ground," she admitted. "I have to live with myself. I've maybe run as far as I can. I don't deserve to forget."_

_"Forget what?" the Doctor asked. "Ginger...are you in some kind of trouble? Because if you are we can help. Sarah Jane and Jack have connections, they can fix things up. You can tell me if you're in trouble."_

_She hesitated, confused as to why she suddenly wanted to tell him. "I'm always in trouble," she joked, finally. "Like that Lenka song, you know? Trouble is a Friend of Mine? Not a friend like Jack's friends, admittedly..."_

_"I can help too," the Doctor said, not letting her deflect. "For them to help they'd have to know everything, but I don't have that problem. I wouldn't have to know anything."_

_The scene changed to one of the two of them arguing on a faraway planet. Judging by the length of her hair, some time had gone by between the two scenes._

_"But it's important," he said. "Important that you know I'm not some barometer of goodness to measure yourself by. I try, but I can't...I didn't tell you the whole truth about the Time War. I made it sound like something that just happened around me. But I was drafted and before I knew what to make of it, I was on the front lines calling shots. The Kwickzots were caught in the crossfire of a conflict they weren't a part of. I relocated them because I felt guilty. All those times they asked for asylum for persecution and Gallifrey turned them away. But when the war ended and there was nobody left...I thought I could fix it. I'm sorry."_

_She was startled. "Why are you apologizing to me?"_

_"Because we're alone. There's nobody else. And that's down to a decision I made that not only nearly wiped out the Kwickzots, but also killed every other remaining member of our species. Ginger, we're alone in the universe and you're cut off from your people and your culture and it's my fault."_

_The scene changed and suddenly they were arguing on the TARDIS._

_"I never pretended to be stable." She laughed bitterly and gripped a railing, swaying slightly. She glared at him. "Is this really going to be the deal breaker for you? You gonna leave me because I won't let you know me? Because that's hypocritical."_

_"First of all, I never said I was leaving you," he said. "Also, I keep trying to let you know me. Do you know how rare that is? I hide my real self from everyone. I want you to know me."_

_"We don't have to do this."_

_"Why not? Why are you so afraid of having a conversation?"_

_"I'm not afraid of having a conversation. We talk all the time!"_

_"Debating the merits of Twin Peaks isn't exactly meaningful conversation."_

_"Well too bad, because that's what you get from me-"_

_"I don't get it, you don't want to know anything? At all? You're so curious and you always want to know everything! You always have an opinion. Sometimes it's like you don't really understand what's happening."_

_"That is so condescending!"_

_"I'm sorry, I know it came out that way, but I didn't mean it like that. I'm just." He closed his eyes and leaned against the console. "Concerned. About you. And it makes me wonder if I'm doing the right thing by giving in to what I want. If you want to know the truth, I'm confused. I don't know what you want from me."_

_"You know what I want."_

_"But do you?" He looked at her. "Do you really understand why you do the things you do? Because your moods change so quickly and you do things sometimes that I'm not sure you're comfortable with. It leaves me in the dark because I don't know you well enough to know which part of you is really you. Sometimes you look at me and it's like magic. But then you say you don't love me. That it's a stupid idea that you'd love me. And I don't know what to make of that."_

_"Wait, slow down, when did I say-"_

_"When they were torturing you. They asked if you love me. You said 'don't be stupid'."_

_"And that's what's got you all twisted up? We're not doing this." She let go of the railing and turned away from him._

_"I just don't understand what I am to you-"_

_"Don't," she warned, glancing back at him with steely eyes and one pointing finger. "Really. We don't need to talk about this." She crossed her arms and turned away again. "It's too complicated."_

_"It doesn't have to be. Make it simple. Because I'm not sure you know how you feel about me sometimes."_

_"Oh for god's sake, Doctor!" she snapped, throwing her hands in the air. "This is a waste of time. Why are you so hung up on this? It's ridiculous. You knew going into this that I don't do this kind of thing well."_

_"What, talk about feelings?"_

_"Yes! So how about we don't!" She let her arms fall to her side and turned to him to plead. "How about you just accept the truth?"_

_"Which is?"_

_"That to have me around is to accept that you'll never know me, because you really don't want to. And I can't be your girlfriend. That's not something I can be. I can't belong to anyone. Not ever. It's like you say, I can't be boxed in. I can't live my life on one side of an ampersand." She laughed again, the slightest edge of desperation entering her voice as she begged him to understand. "It's funny that you, of all people, would think I was trying to be possessive about you. Because that's not me. I'm not that girl."_

Ginger hastily snatched her hand back and looked away. She stumbled back a few paces and the Doctor was startled to see tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," he said. "Did I push-"

"No, it's not your fault," she said. "It's just my mind. It goes places. Did it work, at least?"

"What?"

"Do you have reason to trust me yet?"

"Maybe you're not showing me the right things. Sorry, but as much as I can see how much he trusted you and how much he _wanted_ to trust you, you're not showing me that you gave him particular reason to."

She cast her eyes to the ceiling before closing them and shaking her head irritably. "Well I don't know how to show you that! Sorry, but I don't exactly know what would be good enough!"

He could see that she was becoming frustrated. "It's okay, it's fine, it's not a big deal."

She squinted at him. "Not a big deal? It's kind of life or death for me."

He opened his mouth as if to ask another question when they were interrupted by the Homing Consciousness.

"Your food has been prepared," it said. "Please report to the dining area before it grows cold, as data indicates humanoids prefer hot meals."

Ginger couldn't think of a way to decline, especially considering the fact that she was hungry. "We're on our way," she said.

...

They ate in silence for a few moments. Ginger knew the Doctor was trying to be inconspicuous about the fact that he was staring at her.

"Ask what you want to ask," she said without looking up from her plate.

"Sorry?"

"I can always tell when you've got questions. Your eyes sort of start burning holes in me and you try to seem casual but you get all stiff."

"Do I?"

"You do."

"You sound like you know me pretty well."

"Yeah, well, you spend every waking moment with a guy, you get to know his tells. So just ask me."

"You've never been to Gallifrey."

"That's right."

"And it was news to you that Gallifrey had been destroyed."

"It was."

"You didn't know anything about the Time War or even anything about the planet."

"Just spit it out, already."

"How? Who are you?"

"That's a big question. How would you like me to answer it?"

"Truthfully."

"That's very vague. There's a lot that I don't know about who I am. A lot that's been kept from me. I didn't start making sense of my life until very recently. And even then, I barely know anything. Am I Ginger? I'd like to be. Same as you'd like to be the Doctor. So why don't you ask more directly."

"Are you Gallifreyan?"

"My parents both were."

"But you didn't grow up on Gallifrey?"

"I didn't know Gallifrey or Gallifreyans existed."

"So where did you grow up?"

"On Earth."

"How did you get by on Earth with two hearts not knowing about Gallifrey?"

"Simple. I'm a Gallifrel."

Comprehension rose in his eyes even as a sadness overtook him. "I'm sorry. How long have you known?"

"Not even a year. It's funny being on this side of the conversation, since you were the one who actually explained it to me."

"I was?"

She nodded. "I always felt like I was different, but I could just dismiss that as being because I was an autistic orphan. But nope. Turns out that pocket watch that was left to me was a chameleon circuit."

He wasn't even hiding the fact that he was looking at her now. "So how did he find you? I mean the odds of ever coming across one of you is..."

"Astronomical? Yeah. And it's a long story. He didn't even know what I was til we'd known each other for a few months."

"I can only imagine how excited he must have been once he knew."

"Excited might be the wrong word. I was sort of...getting over a near death experience at the time. He didn't think it was wise to stress me with it. So he waited a few months before telling me. Just to make sure I was stable enough."

"That must've been a lot to take in."

She shrugged. "I accepted it pretty quickly. I've always wanted to be an alien."

"Strange dream to have. Did you imagine your parents were aliens?"

"I didn't imagine my parents at all."

"Really? Most orphans would have."

"I never cared much about them. Sometimes I'd pretend certain fictional characters were my parents, but mostly I've always been very self-reliant."

"I know it's a long-shot, but did you ever find out who your parents were?"

She looked at him with the weight of so many buried secrets. Her heavy heart was evident in the pained expression in her eyes. She opened her mouth slowly as she contemplated just saying it, even as she wondered what such honesty could cost her.

"Pancakes?" said a voice. "Hell of a choice for a last meal."

Ginger almost seemed to deflate momentarily before she regained her composure. The moment had passed, taking with it all the pressure. "Yeah, well. Nobody ever accused me of planning ahead."

AlterAlex scoffed as she took a seat. "Yeah they have. You Gingers are always scheming. Planning like twelve steps ahead of the rest of us."

"Yeah, that's not really me," Ginger said. "I'm more of the impulsive type. Gets me into trouble."

"You don't get into trouble, you _are_ trouble."

"Potato, potahto."

"Is Rose awake yet?" the Doctor asked.

"How should I know?" AlterAlex asked as she dug into her pancakes. "Besides the Homing Consciousness, you're the first people I've seen."

"Very lax security system around here, isn't it?" Ginger asked. "Just us and this Homing Consciousness? Seems a little suspicious."

"This is just how Venutians do things," AlterAlex shrugged. "We're underground and locked in tight. That's enough for them. I mean where are humanoids gonna escape to? The surface? We'd suffocate."

"Actually, there wouldn't be time to suffocate," the Doctor said. "The temperature would get to us first. We'd burn in under a minute and our brains would cook themselves. We'd quickly be reduced to piles of carbonized bones."

"Wicked," Ginger said. "I mean, obviously, it would be terrible for us, but the science is cool as hell."

The corners of his mouth twitched - he obviously found something about her reaction to be amusing. He looked away.

"I shouldn't be surprised that you're not appropriately horrified by that image," AlterAlex said. 

Ginger was trying so hard to remain patient with this Alex. This was still a version of her friend, and she understood that she had a right to her pain. But it really was so frustrating to her that she couldn't seem to get through to her.

"It's alright," she said. "I'm used to not being the most likeable person. I tend to rub people the wrong way. I guess you'll have to be this universe's Corsair."

The Doctor looked up sharply. "You know the Corsair?"

"Yeah," Ginger said. "We've met a few times. Gotta say, she's not my biggest fan."

"And who can blame her?" AlterAlex grumbled.

The Doctor laughed. It was a sound of relief. "She survived. And she's a _she_ again! Good for her!"

It was good to see him looking so happy, even just for a moment. Ginger could hardly bear to look at it. So she didn't.

The Doctor quickly brought himself back to their present situation. "Alright, we're all here. So why isn't Rose? She should be awake by now. Homing Consciousness?"

The orb appeared directly above the center of the table. "Yes, Wesley?"

"Where is R..." He struggled to remember the false name that Ginger had given her. "My friend Debbie?"

"Still resting," the Homing Consciousness replied. "Would you like me to take you to her?"

"Please."

...

The Doctor hesitated before entering the room. He wanted to give her privacy, but he was worried about the fact that she hadn't awakened yet. 

_But is that really what this is about? Maybe you're just scared because you don't know yet how to act around her. I mean it's not exactly like you've set out clear boundaries or defined anything yet. Maybe the real conflict is between your insecurity and how much you want to be around her._

He took a breath and knocked lightly before opening the door. Rose was asleep on the bed, out completely cold. He almost didn't want to wake her. But he had to.

"Rose," he said softly. No response. "Rose?" He slowly approached the bed and crouched beside it. He brushed her hair out of her face. "Rose, it's time to wake up. Come on, you've always been a heavy sleeper, but this is a little ridiculous..." She stirred a bit. "That's it. Come on, Rose. Wake up."

She opened her eyes blearily then slowly smiled. She gently caressed his face. "Doctor."

He grinned. "That's right. I'm here."

"Is it morning already?"

"Not sure. We seem to be underground."

Her memories started coming back to her. She sat up. "What did I miss?"

The Homing Consciousness appeared behind the Doctor, startling them both.

"Apologies for the interruption," it said. "But it is time for transport."

"Transport?" the Doctor said. "To where?"

...

"You know, I'm cooperating voluntarily," Ginger said as a guard roughly thrust her into a room. "You don't have to handle me so roughly."

"Thought that's what you'd be into," AlterAlex said under her breath.

Ginger chose to ignore that. "So what is this place anyway? Some sort of lab?"

The room was full of glittering equipment, none of which she recognized.

The Homing Consciousness reappeared in front of her as the doors were closed and locked behind them.

"This is the Transport Lab," the Homing Consciousness said helpfully. "You'll remember it from your previous visit, though it looked different at the time."

"Yes," Ginger said. "Of course."

"The guards will remain outside the door for their safety. There's no one in here to take hostage as leverage and I've been instructed to report any destruction of property before it can occur."

"Not ominous at all," Ginger muttered.

"So what are we looking at?" the Doctor asked as he moved around the room. "Some of this looks like standard vortex manipulation technology - all rather crude and mostly nonfunctional for anything other than short jumps."

"The peoples of this planet cannot move about on the surface of their world," the Homing Consciousness explained. "They will use spacecrafts if necessary, but the process of breaking the surface is so dangerous."

"So they try to come up with ways to get around that," Ginger said. "Same thing I would do, really."

"So what's the Doctor meant to be fixing?" AlterAlex asked.

"The Doctor trapped the Venutian queen in a pocket dimension," the Homing Consciousness explained.

"Why would he-" The Doctor quickly corrected himself as he remembered that Ginger was pretending to be him. "-she do that?"

"Motivation unknown."

"How was this achieved?"

"A purposeful sabotage of our experimental transport system."

"Could you show us to that?"

"It is what you are here to fix, after all." The orb began bobbing away. "After me."

The Doctor and Ginger exchanged a look and followed, with AlterAlex and Rose in tow.

They reached an unfamiliar hexagonal machine with refracting panels.

"You're kidding," the Doctor said.

"So you recognize it?" Ginger asked. Then she remembered that she was supposed to. "Unusual for a human to recognize something with such a sophisticated design. I'm impressed."

"The Venutians are trying to build a dimensional portal?" the Doctor asked. 

"Hold on, a portal?" Rose asked. "Isn't that incredibly dangerous? Couldn't it rip a hole in reality?"

"For starters," the Doctor said. "It could also backfire spectacularly for anyone who tries to use it."

"Not to mention that portals are just doors," Ginger said. "Any door can be accessed from either side. There's no telling what you could let in." Something occurred to her. "Has this portal ever been used before?"

"The only time the machine was used was to trap the Queen on the other side," the Homing Consciousness said.

"Which side is she on?" 

"Unknown data. The Doctor said she was trapped outside of reality. The running theory is she's trapped between worlds in a dimensional bubble, but we have no data. You will fix the machine and restore our queen."

"Right, yeah," Ginger said. "We'll get right on that. Sure."

The orb bobbed slightly. "I will be around if you need anything." It disappeared.

AlterAlex fixed her steely eyes on Ginger and crossed her arms. "So. Dimensional portal. Very coincidental."

"I know," Ginger said. "It's sort of tripping me out too."

"Uh-huh."

"So why do you think it was destroyed?" Ginger asked. "I mean, why would I have a reason to?"

"I can think of why I would," the Doctor said. "It's dangerous. I'd shut it down to prevent anyone from disrupting reality and causing chain reactions."

"Yeah, but you didn't do this," Ginger reminded him. "You took the fall for me."

"So this is the inevitable part of it all," AlterAlex said. "We get you here, which was your plan all along, and-"

"I won't do it," Ginger said softly.

This genuinely seemed to stump AlterAlex. "What?"

"I won't risk blowing a hole in the fabric of reality," she explained. She turned to the Doctor. "I know you could probably figure out a way to do it safely, but the danger is too great. I won't put any of you in harm's way if this goes Fringe-level. If any of you had to be Ambered because of me..."

AlterAlex couldn't believe what she was hearing. "You're serious?"

"This is your ticket home," the Doctor said gently. "Maybe I could fix it up to be one way then immediately close the bridge-"

"No," she said sternly. "I know you well enough to see that you're only saying that to make me feel better. You don't like your chances any more than I do. I won't ask you to compromise yourself for me. Not again. I won't put you in this position."

"Alright," Rose said. "But what about this queen who's trapped between worlds? Are we just supposed to leave her there?"

"Could there be a way to pull her back without disrupting the fabric of reality?" Ginger asked.

Suddenly, a pink-clad figure with blonde hair that was dyed pink at the ends appeared directly in front of the machine.

"Ginger," Cupid said, relief evident on his face. "I found you. I know it's you this time because of your aura."

" _Cupid?"_ Ginger said. 

"You know him?" the Doctor asked. 

"Never mind that," Rose said under her breath. "Did she just call him Cupid?"

Cupid's gloved hands reached for Ginger's shoulders. "Of all the places I could look for you...I never expected..."

Ginger noticed that he looked a little pale. "You alright?" she asked.

"Fine, I'm fine," he insisted. "Just need a rest...bit of a recharge..."

He collapsed to the floor before anyone could catch him.

"Well," Ginger said. "I can't figure out if this is good news or bad news."

"Who is he?" Rose asked.

"He's Cupid," AlterAlex replied. "Yes, _the_ Cupid." She noticed the Doctor kneeling to check on him. "Don't touch his skin! He secrets pheromones that make people absolutely lose it."

"Maybe if you're human," the Doctor said. "But I'm-"

"No, Doctor," Ginger said softly. "Listen to her, please. Even ignoring the fact that you're partially human now, we encountered this before. It infected you in full Timelord form. We almost..." She looked away quickly. "Well that doesn't matter. The _real_ interesting point is that you and Jack nearly had your clothes all the way off before we got to you."

"Wait?" Rose giggled. "Him and _Jack_? You're making this up."

"Swear on my life," Ginger grinned. "Point is, this is some strong mojo even for a Timelord. Now you're part human. We can't risk it."

"So what do we do?" the Doctor asked.

Ginger thought for a moment. "Homing Consciousness?"

The orb appeared. "It appears we have an unauthorized visitor."

"He's a friend and he can help us," Ginger said. "But I think he's hurt. Would it be possible to take a break until he comes to?"

"I can arrange it."


	29. Have You Seen My Sister Evelyn?

**Prime Universe**

A familiar noise filled the flight deck and a slight breeze kicked up. The Doctor, Sarah Jane, and Jack couldn't be bothered to disguise their relief as the TARDIS materialized in front of them.

The guards instantly stood to attention.

"Unauthorized vehicle approaching!" one shouted.

"Don't shoot!" the Doctor said. "That's my ship!"

"That's my daughter!" Sarah Jane said at the same time.

Inside the TARDIS, Alex took a quick look at the scanners and saw that guns were pointed at the exterior of the TARDIS.

"Alright, everyone," she said. "Hands up and move slowly."

"Right," Nova said. "Don't wanna give the fascists any reason to shoot." She noticed that Alex was barely disguising a grin. "What?"

"Nothing," she said. "Just remind me of Ginger, is all."

"You're really worried about her," Nova said. Alex seemed surprised so Nova pressed on. "I don't have to be an empath to tell that you guys sort of walk on eggshells around her."

"It's not that we walk on eggshells," Alex said. "Most of the time. She's just been through a lot. She needs space to figure herself out."

"Ready?" Thea asked. "I'll go ahead of you just in case. I make a good shield."

"Don't say that," Alex said. "Also go slow. Just open the door a crack to let them know we're not attacking."

"Gotcha," Thea said.

"You really know how to handle these situations, don't you?" Nova asked.

Alex shrugged. "Let's just say I've been at this a while. Plus Torchwood trained me for de-escalation before I was even school age."

Jack was proud of the way Alex emerged from the TARDIS. It was just as he'd always trained her. Hands in the air, posture ramrod straight, head not turning but eyes moving everywhere. Her eyes landed on him. She smiled.

He was very relieved to see her in one piece. "Mission status?" he said.

"It's more complicated than we thought, Jack," Alex said. "The Princess staged the whole thing and-"

"Kidnapped herself?" Sarah Jane interjected. "Yeah, we just figured that out."

"Great," Alex said. "Now that we're on the same page and can work together, would your tin soldiers mind putting down their weapons? We know where Princess Hahmidecta is."

"Let them pass," Karvillian replied. 

The weapons were lowered, and Alex and her friends slowly lowered their hands. Sarah Jane instantly rushed to give Alex a hug.

"So how long did it take you to decide to scrap the plan?" Sarah Jane asked.

Alex crossed her arms. "What do you mean?"

"You expect us to believe that Alex Mitchell-Smith _didn't_ immediately try to warn the Princess of the evil plot?"

"It was almost immediately," Nova said helpfully. 

"Nova!" Alex protested.

"What?" Nova said. "It was!"

"She's honest," Sarah Jane said. "I like this one, Alex."

Alex was instantly mortified by what Sarah Jane was getting at. "Mum, cut it out."

"Don't be too hard on Alex, Miss Smith," Nova said. "She got us kidnapped, but that turned out to be really smart because Alex got her to reveal her whole evil plan."

"How'd you manage that?" Jack asked.

A smile tugged the corners of Alex's mouth. "People who think they're super geniuses _always_ love talking about themselves. You just had to keep asking more questions so she'd keep wanting to explain."

"That's a clever observation," the Doctor said. "How'd you figure that one out?"

Alex chuckled to herself. "You really have to ask after all the time I spent with you and Ginger growing up? If there's one thing I learned from you two, it's that people who think highly of their own intelligence _love_ hearing themselves talk."

"She's got a point, you know," Jack said.

"This is all very amusing," Karvillian said impatiently. "But you said you know where my daughter is?"

"That's right," Alex said. "I had them kidnap us back to their ship. They took us all the way to the base before I gave the signal to Thea to teleport us out of there."

"Why not just teleport out of danger instead of being kidnapped?" Karvillian asked.

"Because then I wouldn't find out where they were going or why," Alex said. She thought this was fairly obvious. "They're on the moon. Close enough to monitor the situation, not close enough to register on a scan."

Karvillian nodded at the pilot, who began steering the ship at once.

"There's another thing," Alex said. "Have you ever heard of this god, Madraykin?"

"War god of of the Neridians," the Doctor explained. "We know that Hahmidecta had been trying to claim contact with the god-"

"We saw her," Alex said.

"What?"

"We _saw_ her," Alex repeated. "She was right there in front of us, giving instructions to Hahmidecta."

The Doctor could see terror in Alex's eyes. "Alex, what's wrong? Did she-"

"I'm not hurt," she said preemptively. "I doubt she even knows I exist, I just...I'm not saying she's real. In fact, I know whoever this was _knows_ she's not a god. I could feel the glee she took in her deception..."

"You felt...something else?" the Doctor prompted.

Alex shook her head and the Doctor understood that she didn't feel comfortable speaking about it further.

"She was hot though," Nova said.

Alex found herself slightly nettled by the comment, though she didn't really show it. "You didn't even see her face."

"Didn't have to," Nova said. "I've always been into the villain aesthetic. Like I know you're freaked and I respect that, but put aside your feelings and look at it objectively. She didn't have a bad figure."

Alex realized that the others were looking at her. "Fine," Alex said. "I suppose, objectively-"

Jack nodded and clapped her on the shoulder. "That's my girl."

"What?" she said. "It's not like I was looking."

"Kind of sounds like you were-"

But Sarah Jane couldn't let herself join in on the teasing. She turned to Karvillian. "Does this satisfy you?" she asked.

"I beg your pardon?" Karvillian asked.

"As you should," she replied sternly. "You've spent all day threatening my family and my planet. I should hope this clears us of any suspicion and you'll leave us alone."

"Hahmidecta was in the wrong," Karvillian said. "Her actions will have consequences."

"But this means you'll no longer try to destroy my planet?"

"Consider my threats retracted."

"Good."

"Do us a favor," Alex said. "After all this is cleared up, don't _ever_ come near the Earth again. And sort your shit out. Your girl got it into her head that the way to glory is to exterminate other people. That's fucked up and unacceptable."

The Doctor had a feeling he knew exactly what Ginger would say if she were here, but decided to keep it to himself.

...

Everyone prepared to leave the ship as the moon came into sight.

"Fierce bargaining back there," Nova said. "I'm impressed. Must be what it was like watching you do all those rent strikes."

Alex's cheeks grew pink and she avoided her gaze. "I just don't like people threatening my home, is all."

"So this is where you leave us, Doctor," Karvillian said. "I can't apologize enough for my rash conduct."

"That's right, you can't," the Doctor replied. "My condolences about your wife, by the way."

"Thank you," he said.

"It's never easy to lose someone."

"You've lost many people, Doctor?"

"Too many to count. And I don't want to lose any more, so if you don't mind, I'd like for us to leave before we get to the moon. This isn't our fight and I don't want to see any of my people get hurt."

"You didn't strike me as a man to bow out of a battle, Doctor."

"Normally, I wouldn't be. But my daughter is here. And there's someone else out there who needs my help. I'm not bowing out of a battle. I'm picking one."

...

The Doctor set the course for London. He noticed Alex looking pensive as she helped. He waited until everyone was out of the TARDIS to talk to her.

"Good work today," he said.

"Hm? Oh. Yeah."

"...Do you want to talk about it?"

She hesitated then shook her head. "Not yet. I'm still trying to sort it all out. Starting to get sort of a headache." She focused on him. "Hey Doc? Do you think we'll find Ginger?"

He didn't immediately answer or look at her. "We have to."

"But if we don't?"

"We have to, Alex. There can't be another option. I can't stand the idea that I..."

She knew exactly what he was feeling. "You didn't abandon her. You've got people on it. She wouldn't want you to throw away everything to save her."

"Wouldn't she? Ginger has never been anyone's first priority. Never once in her entire life. Even when she was important, it was only as a chess piece. I want to be different, I want to show her that someone cares about her beyond what she could reasonably expect. I want to put her before everything so she knows..."

Alex understood. "Look, I won't deny that a part of her will always want you to throw everything away for her. She's dramatic and needy. That's who she is. But she knows she can't come first. She knows what that does to the pair of you. That's supposed to be the point of all this, isn't it? That you put each other first by sacrificing each other?"

"Amazing."

"What is?"

"That you're still doing it, after all this time."

"Doing what?"

"Being the wise one, shouldering everyone else's problems. Even when you said you weren't going to do that anymore."

She turned her back on the console and leaned against it. "Yeah, well...You know what they say about habits?"

"They die hard?"

"Apparently they're harder to kill than Timelords. Ginger will be fine, wherever she is. I don't know of anything strong enough to kill her. I mean, I've lived my life around immortals and I'd still bet on Ginger outliving all of you by sheer dumb luck. And she'd be so mad about it."

He chuckled. "She would be, wouldn't she?"

"Oh for _sure_ ," Alex said. "Look, I need to go have a lie down. Can't remember the last time I slept at this point. Will you be alright?"

"I'll manage."

"Yeah. You always do. You let me know if you have any updates the minute you get them, yeah?"

"That's a promise."

Alex left the Doctor to ponder his next move. He thought about reaching out to Cupid and the others, but didn't even know where to begin. The door opened again.

The Doctor turned to face the newcomer. "Thought you were going to bed, Alex-" he began.

Before him stood a woman dressed all in green with a long cloak and a dark mask.

"You're not Alex," he said. "Madraykin, I presume?"

The woman kept her eyes on him as she withdrew a small hexagonal prism from her cloak and threw it at his feet. He braced himself for impact, but it simply lay dormant, emitting a dull red glow.

"What is this?" the Doctor asked. "What do you want?"

The woman spoke and her mask filtered the words through a voice changer that made it come out mechanical and raspy. "I give you a gift, Timelord. You passed the test."

"Test? Oh you mean sending an army to destroy the Earth? You call that a test?"

"You chose the world over your Wysaella," she said. "An impossible choice to any of your predecessors. But you managed it and found a solution."

"My daughter did most of the legwork." He peered at her closely. "Hang on...Do I know you from somewhere? You look really familiar...Which I realize sounds ridiculous because I can't see you through that costume or even hear your voice...But something about you is _very_ familiar."

"Do you always ask such complicated questions?"

"Call it a bad habit," he admitted. "But what's so complicated about it?"

"You have bigger questions. Allow me to start you off: Have you seen my sister Evelyn?"

"Your...sister?"

"Where oh where'd my sister Evelyn go?"

"I don't know anyone by that name."

"Not by that name. I suppose she's never gone by that one, though she's gone by many."

He thought he was beginning to somehow catch on. "You mean Ginger? Is that who you're talking about?"

"Very good, Timelord. I suppose I'll cut right to the chase. Your Wysaella is trapped in another dimension. The one you call Pete's World."

"Oh," he said. " _Oh._ That's very..." He felt as though all the air was being sucked from the room. "That's very...How?"

"Does that matter?"

"Yes. If I'm never going to see her again, at least it would help to rationalize it."

"You assume you'll never see her again?"

"She's in an alternate dimension. I can't get to her without breaking the universe."

"I'm gifting you a way to get to her without breaking the universe. You earned it by proving you weren't willing to risk the lives of the Earthlings and now you prove it again with your willingness to leave her in the other dimension."

"There's not a way to get to the other universe," the Doctor said. "Not anymore."

"This is a way older than your Timelord society, so I'm not surprised you don't know of it. The technology has been kept secret in the few of us who know of it for thousands of years. There isn't another one in the universe and it is rigged to self destruct in one hour. It will help you retrieve her."

"How?"

"Activate the prism and insert DNA from the person you're seeking. It will then take you to that person."

"There are other Gingers in this universe," he pointed out. "How will I know it won't take me to them?"

"Each universe has a slightly different composition. Any doppelgangers will be ruled out due to their exposure to the other universe's radiation. The prism will take you to her, but you won't be physically in the other universe. Think of it as the universe bending around you, getting ready to snap you back like a sling shot. If you stay too long, you will tear the fabric of reality. You can retrieve only the person whose DNA is within the prism, as the field around you will bond to them as well. You can swap out the DNA once arriving to take someone else, but it will only take one other person at a time."

"Why would I want to take someone else?"

The woman stepped up to him and slipped something into his pocket. "It will not unlock until you reach the other side. If you change your mind about your intended, you may use it then."

"I need more than this," he said. "I need answers. I need an explanation."

"You're running out of time."

"You did all this just to test me?"

"To test both of you."

"Why do you care so much about us?"

"I don't. I find you fascinating. I want to see how far you'll go."

"So you arranged for her to go to another universe."

"She did that to herself. I merely took advantage of a unique opportunity."

"And if I'd failed this test you would've called it off? Spared the Earth?"

She laughed. "No. Actions must have consequences! What good is testing probability if I don't follow through with the outcome? Now are you going to attempt to detain me, Doctor, or shall I save the rest of your questions for a later date? Pick up the prism or come after me. You don't have time for both."

He glared at her for a moment before stooping to pick up the prism. When he looked up, she was gone.

...

The Doctor rushed into Alex's apartment.

Alex stood up at once. "Woah, Doc. Am I picking up some tentative hope? Did you find something that would save Ginger?"

"Does she have a hairbrush?" the Doctor asked as he barged into Ginger's room.

"Fair question," Alex quipped under her breath.

"No, I mean it. It could be important."

"There's one on the vanity just there."

"Perfect!" 

He snatched it up and began pulling hair from it.

"Uh, making a Polyjuice Potion, Doc?" Alex asked.

"I need DNA," he said as he pulled the prism from his pocket. "Your Madraykin payed me a visit."

Her eyes widened. "What did she want?"

"To give me this. Evidently it was all a test. She arranged this all to see if I would choose Ginger over the Earth."

"Seriously? She gambled all this on the pair of you? We're lucky to still be alive!"

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, Alexia."

"Sorry, but it's true! You two would make moon eyes at each other during the bloody apocalypse, so forgive me for being a little indignant that my life was the collateral for one of your relationship tests _yet again._ "

"You actually have a point. But I do have to go. If this works-"

"What if it doesn't? What if it just blows up? You can't know this isn't another test!"

"She says Ginger's in Pete's World."

Her brow furrowed. "Pete's World? Wait, hang on, didn't you say that's another universe?"

"Exactly. And this might be the only way to get her back and I only have 45 minutes left until it self destructs, making it impossible to even try to replicate it."

"Then you have to go," she said. "You have to get Ginger back. If you're sure this is safe for us and won't explode our world or anything."

"She says it won't, but I'm not sure about anything. I just know that Ginger's out there."

She could hear the pleading note in his voice. "Then you have to try. But please. Be safe."

"I'll do my best."

He fit the hairs into the prism then closed the hatch. He looked up at her one last time.

"I'm so proud of you," he said. "I mean that. I couldn't've asked for a braver daughter."

"And I couldn't've asked for a weirder dad," she said. "But that's why I love you, I guess. Geronimo?"

He nodded and pressed the button on the prism. He disappeared from sight.


End file.
